Your Mileage May Vary: Younger Mistresses, Herpes Prevalence, Golden Spigots, Proper Bikini Shaving, Truth

Episode Transcript

Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.

[00:00] Keith: Hello and welcome to your mileage may vary. We talk about sex and relationships with frankness that is controversial but mostly in good faith on today's show we're going to talk about a woman with an eye patch how to shave your bikini area. How and when to discuss herpes and if we have time. Golden showering I am Keith my co-host is Mike how's it going mike.
[00:21] Mike: Good good Keith I thought thought of you at the beach today I'm in Lake tahoe and um I was at the beach and I saw a woman lying on her stomach in a bikini and ah.
[00:29] Keith: Um.
[00:33] Keith: Nice.
[00:37] Mike: She was extremely attractive and I was looking at her and then she turned over and still very attractive. But then I noticed that she had like some kind of a scar on her leg and I thought of you because I thought oh this is the kind of thing that would like immediately turn Keith off and like it did it. It worked on me a bit too like I mean everything else was very very.
[00:41] Keith: O r.
[00:55] Mike: Amazing and then she just had this one defect and I was like oh and it was just probably two inch two and a half inches long not huge but it was it didn't look good so that yeah oh.
[00:55] Keith: Right.
[01:03] Keith: How was her how was her face Did you even notice or was the scar so off putting you didn't okay.
[01:10] Mike: Everything else was great I mean she yeah she she clear that she fit her bikini really well like it was really compelling. But then that yeah it was just it wasn't It was sort of puffy. This was sort of puffy though it wasn't just a scar it was like it looked like something like a.
[01:15] Keith: I think I could tolerate I think I could tolerate a scar I I I like tattoos for example or at least oh I see there's a deformation. Yeah.
[01:30] Mike: They call them keyloids yeah like something had gone wrong Maybe like the healing process hadn't worked properly and it was yeah.
[01:36] Keith: Yeah, yeah I don't love that I guess um have I talked on the podcast about when I see ah dating app photos and somebody like is in Crutches or in a cast and how that just that. Turns it to an immediate next for me.
[01:54] Mike: You have talked about that you haven't talked about the thing you sent me the image you sent me today though with the ah doing I don't know if that topic maybe you don't want to talk about but you have some expertise on that.
[01:58] Keith: Um, oh yeah, ah yeah, we can talk about it I guess I've noticed on dating apps. There are a lot of people that I don't know if they.
[02:07] Mike: Um.
[02:14] Keith: Should be ashamed or not I mean I guess it's better for their mental health that they're not ashamed, but people will prominently display their cutting scars on their online dating profile photos and.
[02:24] Mike: You think they're that may you think they they they think that the people looking at them would know what they are like they're doing it. They're they're doing it on purpose. Yeah.
[02:34] Keith: Well, okay, first of all, what are what are cutting scars. So a lot of people. Um more young women than young men. But ah folks will cut themselves maybe with a razor or some other um sharp. Blade. Um, and they'll cut themselves in in small ways just to I don't know there's various reasons but um, people do this to maybe get a sense of control when they feel like they don't have good control of their life and um, it will leave these like little. Scars where where you've done it and some people have just a few um a lot of people will start like on their upper legs where you can't see them as much but if they really lean into it. They'll have them on their arms and maybe some other places. Um.
[03:27] Mike: Is it insensitive of me to ask the other's gonna be yes. Ah why? like? Okay, you want to you want to get some control and you want to sort of do something that hurts you want to you want to sort of you want to feel alive or something I I can understand I can vibe with that. But why not like. Try to do a plank for as long as you can because that's pretty painful right? I mean even me I'm I'm I'm an expert planker but even me at like minute 6 it starts to you know, start shaking and stuff like that and and for most people it's probably like 20 seconds in that happens like what? What do you have any any insight into this why or or you know do a bunch of pushups. Do that thing where you like are like sitting down without a chair with your back against the wall there. There are things that really hurt that you can do that are actually but good for you right? I mean why? why why? Why do they have to hurt themselves I actually don't understand.
[04:11] Keith: Ah, yeah I mean I don't know why people self-harm. Um I think the sort of generic answer is it's a outlet for emotional pain. You know when they feel like they can't bear it. Yeah.
[04:22] Mike: But isn't exercise is an exercise, a form of self- harm I mean couldn't you say like I'm I'm so upset I'm going to go do a wind sprint and just feel awful. You know, throw up afterward which is you know, sort of easy to do to be honest I mean just get out there and sprint you know for for 2 minutes I mean you're gonna.
[04:37] Keith: Um, yeah I mean exercise is a good solution to almost all mental and emotional issues. It's hard not to feel better after but I think people can't see that in the haze of their.
[04:40] Mike: Be in real trouble after that. Okay, okay.
[04:51] Keith: Depression or feeling out of control or emotional pain or whatever it may be and I think it I think it becomes an addiction like they feel this overwhelming urge to harm themselves like particularly during times of emotional pain.
[04:54] Mike: Okay, I mean yeah.
[05:04] Mike: Okay, that makes sense. Okay, so you see you see people on dating date dating apps and the like who display these the results the scars.
[05:13] Keith: Well yeah I mean I think I first sent you a photo of somebody a number of months ago and then like ever since I guess I've been noticing it more but it's interesting that I mean I guess it's good that they're comfortable showing it like.
[05:23] Mike: And will that not though because you have told me that you unusually will sometimes actually directly ask about it. You'll say which I look I think it's sort of appropriate. It doesn't but.
[05:31] Keith: Well yeah, yeah.
[05:38] Mike: Yeah, you you say look I have some expertise here I've seen this enough times to know what it is and you ask about it and the people but the important thing here is that they are not they have you had a person be straightforward about it when you asked. Okay, so they're not. They're not displaying it.
[05:41] Keith: Um, yeah.
[05:45] Keith: no no I think it's not good I think it's not good pre first date pattern that's my main lesson but like obviously that should fit pretty clear.
[05:56] Mike: Fish.
[05:59] Keith: Before but I thought like look yeah I'm trying to relate and you know make an interesting conversation and it's better than just saying hey or whatever and like if you're showing your your scarring. Um I feel like it. Ok I felt like it could be sort of inviting.
[06:15] Mike: You wait.
[06:15] Keith: Um, some sort of attention to it but mostly they're probably just recovering and they're you know part of their recovery is trying to you know, be less feel a shame around it themselves and but but that doesn't mean that that doesn't mean they want to talk about it with some random stranger that just matched with online.
[06:25] Mike: So when you brought it up. You weren't just.
[06:32] Mike: You were genuinely. You genuinely thought they might want to have a conversation about it. You weren't just doing it to this wasn't somebody that you you just were curious to see how they react or kind of okay, okay.
[06:41] Keith: I don't remember I don't I don't normally do things for sport like that. But I don't remember for sure. Yes, yeah, but I think I did send you one of those conversations and.
[06:49] Mike: That's true. You don't I that's much more what I would do is to is to? yeah.
[06:57] Mike: I think she denied it now you I think got irritated when she said it wasn't what it was and then you said look I I know what to say you know you weren't You were not nice. You were firm. You are firm.
[07:00] Keith: Yeah, but yeah I think I was nice in it I don't remember if we'll have to go back and check the archives.
[07:10] Keith: Oh I wanted I wanted your opinion on whether it was obvious to you that they were cutting scars. That's right I remember that congress you know right? I remember now right.
[07:19] Mike: It's hard for me to say because this isn't something that I mean I'm not a clinician I haven't encountered this my my kids knock on wood. Don't do this and I've certainly I've cut myself but not on purpose. So I don't know yeah these these weird sort of linear cuts that are all parallel very odd. Um.
[07:30] Keith: Ah, right? so.
[07:33] Keith: That right? Yes, she tried. Yeah I could imagine stretch marks occasionally looking like cutting scars but these did not.
[07:35] Mike: And you're right that it is. It's remarkable I mean I think she argued there were stretch marks Maybe I mean I I don't think stretch marks tend to be that linear. They tend to sort of follow the contour of the skin more. But yeah.
[07:49] Mike: Um, no, they did not That's right.
[07:52] Keith: Yeah, um, okay I wanted to talk about 1 other thing before we get into our our topics of the day. So I have spoken to 2 women in the last week that let's see they basically said that they aren't looking for a relationship. They do want to meet up and potentially even probably have sex. Um, but they both expressed irritation at men wanting to date them and falling for them and I actually have somebody texted me one of these 2 people texted me this and she said specifically. Problem now is that I'm basically just looking for fun experiences and good sex. But every guy I meet is infatuated with me. So now I'm the asshole and I wanted to know how that squares both of these women are in their mid 20 s and so I wanted to know what you think is going on. What is your theory of mind for these 2 women.
[08:50] Mike: Well, there's a there's a gentleman on Tiktok who makes videos about this sort of phenomenon and his argument would be for sure that they're trying to kind of optimize. So basically they his argument would be that they are only dating top. 5 % men or something and and I'm talking about physical attractiveness year. Um, and they basically are just kind of having sort some sort of relationship. Add where they date a guy until they kind of get bored and then they move on. Um and they're flighty and not.
[09:11] Keith: Um, yeah.
[09:28] Mike: Really looking at flighty might not be the right word. They're not looking for sort of anything anything long term and they don't the ah rhetoric about guys getting infatuated with them may be ah more related to a perception that they once or twice dated a guy who was a 6 Or a 7 instead of a 9 and then they had that experience with that guy and so they're constantly kind of trading up out of that experience. Um, that was what that's what this guy in this guy. Yeah, he makes a lot of hay out of that I forget his username um, my view wanted is that this is definitely not ah optimal.
[09:50] Keith: Ah.
[09:53] Keith: Are.
[10:06] Mike: Mating strategy for a woman. Um it it doesn't make a whole lot of sense and I think they're basically responding to what they've been taught from social media and from from society at large and and and I'm sure this is surely surely a path to being extremely unhappy.
[10:24] Keith: Ok here we go I was hoping you would take this this tack. Okay, what if I mean both of these women are exceptionally attractive and so they sort of have their pick amongst men.
[10:26] Mike: For them.
[10:42] Mike: It's really really hard when you say things like that and I don't get to see the pictures immediately but go on. Yeah yeah.
[10:46] Keith: Yeah, I'm sorry ah I mean is it not a good strategy to just fuck around for a while and then settle down later.
[10:58] Mike: It is not. It is not a good strategy It's not a good strategy for a couple reasons number one it ah lowers the her their loot they're they're lowering their own value now I don't know I mean are these are these women ah doctors lawyers 10 x are engineers. Are any of them going to be on the supreme court like what would you say the odds that the smartest one of these women is on the supreme court in 30 years what are the odds.
[11:22] Keith: I mean the same as they are for you and I which is 0
[11:27] Mike: Okay, so zero they're not like so we're not This is not um I'm not sure if the supreme court actually is the right standard there but I was just picking something I can't pick congress or president because the yeah getting there just requires being having dementia.
[11:38] Keith: I Don't want to I don't want to I don't want to dox these women but they both are in very respectable careers like they're above average like materially above average and in that aspect.
[11:47] Mike: Okay, okay.
[11:56] Mike: Um, so that's good. That's good for them. Um, the bad side is that that's not necessarily I mean to the extent that they're single and they remain single that's fine. That's not necessarily the value that's going to be optimal. The thing that a man is going to be optimizing for in selecting a woman. Their attractiveness will decrease over Time. It's decreasing daily if they're in their mid 20 s they also every time they have a new partner or decreasing their value. Ah, frankly, whether or not they reveal it to some later partner.
[12:19] Keith: Who.
[12:32] Mike: Ah, there will be behavior changes and whatnot that ah that that So so in other words, you know they had a certain amount of value and every time they have a new partner that value is decreasing and people could say oh well, you're just so anti-feminist look this is just I didn't make the rules I'm just describing the rules of the game here like this is how it works and and.
[12:48] Keith: Yeah, but even if it were true that there was some measurable drop in their attractiveness because of this behavior. There's some potentially measurable value in the short term hedonism.
[12:51] Mike: Yeah.
[13:04] Mike: That's true. Ah I mean yeah so you have to like do the area under the curve of the value they would have for their entire life. Um I mean ah women women prioritizing hedonism.
[13:09] Keith: Right? Yeah yeah.
[13:21] Mike: Interesting I mean so so the way the defense of that would have to be something like you'd have to say something like this. You'd have to say essentially every successful culture in the world ever was poorly constructed. You've discovered a new way to do culture that will work really well. Where you're just a super hedonistic female and like literally everybody else every other me I'm sure that you can find some like corner case culture where women were super super hedonistic. All these other ones just had it wrong. They didn't understand what sort of Maximized happiness and social welfare and so forth and you'd be saying look I've I've figured it out I've I've cracked. I've I've cracked the the combination here I mean on the other hand I would say look the thing that you're pursuing makes doesn't make a whole lot of sense for a woman. It's super easy if I were a hot woman in her mid 20 s I could do what you're doing instantly. It would be trivial. So I mean.
[14:11] Keith: Yeah I think their complaint is something around maybe feeling badly for the men after or something I'm not I'm not sure exactly yeah or ghost them or whatever it may be.
[14:20] Mike: After what the guy after they break up with him. Yeah I mean it's ah there How how let me ask you this. How is a woman like that ever going to be a mother like how can that work like she's basically training herself to abandon people. She purportedly likes cares about Loves. She's she's learning to Abandon. Abandon people and so then all of a sudden. She's going to just do a big u-turn ah Hairpin and suddenly she's going to have you know she's going to find a guy that she's just all this. You're the one like it's just not plausible like I mean to the extent that like you're learning how to live your life like this is nonsensical.
[14:55] Keith: Um, well men men that have slept with a lot of women are expected to make that hundred eighty degree pivot right.
[15:07] Mike: It's much easier for a man because men well actually I mean there's a point where I think a man could go off this cliff as well Actually but I think it's easier for a man because the social like the the so the the position that men occupy differs from that of a woman. The man is not expected to be sort of the primary. Love Giver to ah to the to the kids. The man is not expected to you know he's He's expected to have a wandering eye and like there's all these social structures that are designed to um, make make it not.
[15:27] Keith: Right.
[15:40] Mike: So socially palatable for him to follow that wandering eye if a woman also has a wandering eye like what what next like now. What.
[15:40] Keith: Ah, okay, okay, so you're making an argument that um the the short term hedonism sort of does some irreversible damage to things like compassion and empathy and.
[15:56] Mike: I'm certain that the damage pre predated the shortterm hedonism in these cases. These are people that have either had challenging life experiences that have altered them kind of ah you know in in a somewhat permanent way from the typical life path that like we know from.
[16:11] Keith: Aha.
[16:13] Mike: From thousands of years of human record mean there literally is nothing in human recorded history. That's parallel to this like there's no, there's there's just nothing like no no society never works this way so they so either they've either had a bad luck experience. Yeah.
[16:20] Keith: Well yeah, but there's a lot of things. There are a lot of things that are different. You know in the last 40 years that are unprecedented like that's not necessarily an argument in itself. But.
[16:32] Mike: That's true, but that's true. But I mean people's people's brains haven't haven't evolved in the last forty years they might have involved in the last thousand years but not in the last forty and so people and so you're creating fundamentally like an inhumane situation for yourself now that's true that there are other things that are inhumane for people like.
[16:39] Keith: Fair yeah.
[16:50] Mike: Fast-paced society having access to screens having all of the world's information at your fingertips pretty soon having an ai assistant that you can just talk to all the time ai porn. There's all these things that are like wow this is really different. Um, but but the underlying argument here that these women are basically making unless I'm misunderstanding it is look. They're just they've just ah they figured it out. they've they've changed they're they're now a new type of person who does not have the ah sort of desires that a woman more than twenty years ago had they've they've discovered that they've they figured it out and they've moved on.
[17:20] Keith: I don't yeah I can't speak for either of them. But I suspect they would say something like they have plenty of time and in the short term. They're not interested in settling down.
[17:36] Mike: Yeah I mean some some things when done can't be on an and undone they can't be undone like you can't you know you're learning how to live life. You're basically yeah, the argument is I'm going to live my life this way and then all of a sudden look if they want to be hedonous their entire life I would respect that more but you see I know they don't.
[17:45] Keith: Um, okay.
[17:55] Mike: The thing you said is very telling you you said you suspected it. They want to be hedonous until they turn a certain age and then switch around and that's literally the cock carousel idea that incels have they're they're literally doing the Incel Playbook Ah, in other words, what incels think women do they're literally doing that and.
[17:56] Keith: Um, yeah.
[18:14] Mike: So and and I just it just doesn't yeah it's sort of Cliche and I don't think it's going to work out. Well for them. You know about the cock carousel. It's basically the idea that it's the idea that women so it it does. There's this idea that incels have that.
[18:19] Keith: Hu Okay, maybe I can now what is the cock carrot So sounds horrible.
[18:33] Mike: You know because the the whole incel thing is you know you're a guy you're let's say a 5 or a 4 or 6 or something and you're fine. You're a guy that like fifty years ago would have had him a wife and so forth. But now so so there is this phenomenon that is all over social media where um, essentially all okay if you do the curves.
[18:38] Keith: Ah.
[18:53] Mike: Of Who upfoots people on Tinder Bumble hinge and so forth who swipes right? women do it in a women swipe right on men less than men swipe right on women but they do it in a Bell curve. No sorry, it's either other way on men swipe right on women more than women do but men do it in a bell curve meaning that there's a certain set of women that just like. Absolutely no swipes. There's a certain set of women that everybody swipes and then it but it follows a Bell curve. It's like a probabilistic distribution. It's sort of what you would expect So the woman in the middle kind of gets the middle amount of swipes whereas women swiping on men. It's It's like that curve except it's way to the right meaning that there's like 50% of men who get never get a swipe right.
[19:24] Keith: Um.
[19:32] Mike: And then there's this tiny fraction say 5% at the top that are getting swept right by women much more frequently and the argument is basically that incels make is basically that this causes women to do what they say they call riding the cock carousel which is women will say oh they all figure out that they can date the top 5% guy which is true.
[19:35] Keith: Okay.
[19:51] Mike: Most women can because the top 5% guy doesn't care. He doesn't want a relationship. He just wants to fuck attractive women or whatever. It's women and they're ah ah, men are perfectly willing to just change partners all the time and psychologically set up to handle that type of lifestyle and that makes sense because men don't carry the baby men can you know have.
[19:58] Keith: Um, yeah.
[20:08] Keith: Okay, okay, yeah.
[20:09] Mike: And Principal thousands of Children. So So the insel argument is that women basically do this and then at some point they do this hairpin turn where they say Oh I've finished writing the carousel now I'm going to now I'm going to settle down with somebody and they get extremely animated and irritated about this and I think rightly so but in that like. This is sort of this this lifestyle that people adopt ah makes it basically so they have no chance of finding a partner and there are a lot of men that just sort of give up on dating because of that.
[20:37] Keith: Um, okay, okay, um, yeah I guess they are both attempting to ride the Cock arisbel.
[20:44] Mike: For former Wilson is here I want to say I want to say that I am married so I'm not an incel but I totally I think they have a really good point like I'm not I'm not an involuntary celibate person. But I think they I think they're making a really good point and yeah I think that these women are not. Ah, filling the role in society that like makes sense for them. They've like turned the the um they've turned the mating strategy on its head and there is a psychological price. They will pay for that and they probably already are paying.
[21:17] Mike: They would be much happier if they just had it if they'd met some guy in college that they liked and they'd settle down with him. They'd be much happier if they'd done that.
[21:25] Keith: I Think on average that may be true I don't know if I don't know if that doesn't mean that there aren't some exceptions people that have.
[21:31] Mike: Um.
[21:35] Mike: I bet you if you did a psychological inventory of women that do this thing and then did it against traits traits that when I'm trying to say traits or life experiences that indicate for either abuse. Or some sort of extreme like feminist theological indoctrination I bet you there'd be a strong correlation meaning that it's not a genetic trait. It's not like they're they're super butch. They have a lot of testosterone. It's not that it's that like something happened in their life where they and it could just be like their exposure to modern culture. But.
[22:08] Keith: Perhaps perhaps but it's yeah, it's not deaf. It's not causal in in both directions right? So like if you had something bad happen to you that doesn't mean you'll be like this and if you're like this it doesn't mean that something that happened to you but they're.
[22:09] Mike: This sort of tweak has happened to them.
[22:23] Mike: It very frequently does for women. In fact, like there's there's a lot of abuse scenarios for and I don't understand this at all is yeah sure I'm not saying they were abused. There's a good chance.
[22:28] Keith: Yeah, we're just we're just arguing about the degree of correlation I guess.
[22:38] Mike: But I'm not saying they were I think it's I think it's just as likely that they were sort of psychologically abused by feminist culture.
[22:43] Keith: Man if either of them listen to this I'm going to get get yelled at um, but that's a good place to move on from you have any Eddie you want to do any anymore of your misogynist rant ranting before we.
[22:53] Mike: Sure.
[22:59] Keith: Move on.
[22:59] Mike: Um, it's not. It's really so I want to say that it's sad. It's sad that we're at a place in our culture where I know it's that's very sad all I'm saying is like read some history like get off a Tiktok I could say that to myself and it.
[23:05] Keith: Um, that's how it's going to be heard. That's how it's going to be heard.
[23:14] Mike: And like read any history of any epic of human history in any culture and you'll see that what you're doing is just makes no sense. Um I am frustrated that I haven't seen their pictures yet. So I'm hoping to get that eventually just thus showing the male, the male.
[23:21] Keith: All right.
[23:27] Keith: Ah, yeah.
[23:32] Mike: Wandering eye.
[23:34] Keith: Right? All right? Let's talk about the ipadch lady. Ah this person says my boyfriend of 5 years just told me he no longer finds me desirable because I lost an eye. Um, my partner boyfriend of 5 years just told me he no longer finds me attractive since my brain surgery that caused me to lose 1 eye. So he's gotten a mistress in her twenty s for sex this couple's in there I think late 40 s I have an eye patch now and probably will for the rest of my life. But really I'm not even sure what to do with this I'm still recovering so can't quite leave yet. We live together but I'm just in shock besides the £10 I gained and the eye patch I looked the same as I did when we started dating. Formal model but I wasn't when we met I did my best to find a man that I thought wasn't with me solely for my looks because I knew one day they would go. The irony is they stood with him through chemo he lost his hair and then gained £25 and I still made sure he felt desirable mad at myself for letting this put me in a deep depression. My surgery was two months ago strangers still compliment me on my looks. Ah, graciously say thank you and move on so I still believe at least 1 man will still find me attractive with high patch but I just feel awful because this is the one person who I've shared my life with and looks at me with disgust so I cry and then I get mad at myself for crying. How does the crying work I guess.
[24:46] Mike: Because she's upset. Oh you're wondering about her crying with the missing eye.
[24:50] Keith: Yeah I was making a very off color joke I keep thinking he is crazy but that doesn't stop the Tear. So I guess I'm just asking for encouragement from people who are on the other side of leaving an unappreciative partner and now with a good one and really any encouragement. Okay, so this is. Heartbreaking of course. But the reason why I brought it up is um.
[25:13] Mike: What's I mean it's kind of a cool story for the guy right? I mean the guy had cancer. He got helped through the chemo and now he has like a 20 something year old mistress. So like I mean don't don't like drop that on the floor like the guy is having a pretty good time. Yeah.
[25:23] Keith: Right? Sorry right? Yeah, the the net happiness here might be around the same right? She's a little bit lower. He's a lot higher. Um, ah yeah, the effect of altruists would have to weigh the scales there and see whether this is a preferable situation.
[25:38] Mike: Yeah.
[25:40] Keith: Um, what is reasonable as couples that have been together for a long time progress like okay, let's say your partner puts on £400 Okay you you might say that the partner that doesn't put on £400 may be within. Their rights to be a little bummed and less sexually attracted. It's like Okay, what if a partner is in a car accident and loses an arm. Ah yeah, you know is that reasonable. You know is is your agency in the disfigurement important like. I I could imagine being less attracted to a person with one eye myself and it wouldn't be on Purpose. Ah.
[26:24] Mike: Would you would you if you were in his shoes and let's assume let's just stipulate that she is still pretty attractive based on what she said would you rather she have one eye or no eyes.
[26:34] Keith: Ah.
[26:37] Keith: 1 one. This is like the old mermaid question would you prefer a woman. Do you know this one? Okay, let it sit here for a second would you prefer a woman who is a mermaid from the waist up or a mermaid from the waist down. Yeah.
[26:43] Mike: No.
[26:49] Mike: Ah, right right? And of course we don't know what the genitals of a mermaid are like so it's tricky Wait isn't the mummaid from the waist up isn't a meradeid from the waist up just a person.
[26:57] Keith: Right? Yeah I mean you're Presuming. It's just a fin. No, they have a fen and no vagina.
[27:08] Mike: Um, you know wait The waist is above the Vagina key So a mermaid from the waist up is going to have legs so isn't that just a person.
[27:11] Keith: Now Mermaid from the waist up. No a mermaid from the waist up is a person but doesn't have.
[27:23] Mike: What's I mean they're they're human from the waist down in a mermaid I don't think this joke makes sense right? because.
[27:25] Keith: Oh sorry in that case, Yeah, from the waist down they have female Genitalia but the top is a fish.
[27:33] Mike: Oh Jesus. Okay, so it's not it's not I get it so it's not a mermaid. It's some sort of freak. It's like the opposite of a mermaid. Well so obviously obviously people would rather yeah so people would obviously pick the mermaid because I mean.
[27:39] Keith: Oh I see what you're saying I see. Okay, you're right? It isn't very well stated yet I Guess it's a fish from the waist up or fish from the waist down. Yeah.
[27:53] Mike: Historically you know the Mermaids come from these various although I'm well aware that the story. The little mermaid comes from is actually not quite as friendly as the disneyified version of it. But anyway there is this stuff from history of people fetishizing Mer people.
[28:07] Keith: Of.
[28:09] Mike: And so obviously you'd pick the mermaid not the facial fish with the human legs like that makes no sense I mean neither is particularly appetizing but okay.
[28:13] Keith: Well, the joke is that men are like so obsessed with vaginas that they would tolerate a person who's a fish from the waist up.
[28:26] Mike: That's not true because a man then you could just go have sex with goats or whatever like that's not that's not actually right? They there's a lot more to it than that For instance, where would you where would you Ah, where would you bust your nut who what would happen to the come on tongue sub ruddit in this world.
[28:40] Keith: They would yeah I mean people maybe you know some would choose one half and some would choose the other half.
[28:43] Mike: Think of come on gills. It's great. Okay, so what's yeah so I mean this is like a somewhat common situation that comes up like 1 partner I mean it could be as simple as a person is asexual like just is like look I don't want to have sex anymore.
[29:02] Keith: Yep people change over time.
[29:02] Mike: Um, you could also have somebody that just becomes a bum like I mean let's say you're a woman and you're married to a guy and he just is like becomes a bum like your you know he just doesn't He's yeah and doesn't have doesn't doesn't provide in the way he did and maybe you're a stay at home Mom or something and you're like wait a minute I mean I think that there.
[29:11] Keith: It's playing video games at home all day.
[29:20] Mike: You know it's basically there, there are points where people it's reasonable for somebody to say look the Baseline agreement that we had at the beginning of there's relationship is no longer operative in this case. Um, yeah, it's a little more complicated I mean I think that yeah because it sounds like she's still sexually interested in him and so.
[29:29] Keith: Null and void.
[29:38] Keith: Um, yeah.
[29:39] Mike: It's basically just he just doesn't want to have sex with someone who has an eye patch. He's also probably taking advantage of the situation to trade Yes, which is kind of understandable I mean I you know? And yeah I mean I.
[29:43] Keith: Um, that's an excuse. Yeah.
[29:53] Mike: It's tricky for her because even if she got him to agree not to do this. He's still the kind of person who would do this So how is that better. So I mean I think it's the woman's fault in all and in these situations generally I think it's the woman's fault and let me see Yes, no, it's her fault because the woman's job is to be selective and to pick.
[29:57] Keith: Right? right? Well yeah, forgetting the brain surgery.
[30:11] Keith: Yeah, and this guy's deterred.
[30:12] Mike: A good guy that's their job. It really is their job and like I like I was in um I was in where was I was in Walmart in Carson City Nevada a couple days ago um what was I in there for I needed something to be able to pipe pump up the tires of my um mountain bike.
[30:19] Keith: Why.
[30:27] Keith: Okay.
[30:29] Mike: These like cool devices that have a battery in them. It's good. You know, nice anyway, I so I saw a couple 2 different couples in Carson City Nevada which is the state capitol but still where the woman was really attractive and like the guy was not so great and I'm thinking to myself. Okay, maybe 1 of them is like the governor or something I don't know. But it always sort of irritates me when there's like a really attractive woman that has chosen one of these guys I think you just failed you you you did it you you did now of course I don't know you sometimes the guy may have some qualities that I'm totally unaware of I'm just making some snap judgments but like but in general that's the woman's job. The guy wants to have sex with everybody. And the woman has this job of like weeding out and finding ah a high-qual guy and this woman picked a guy who you know would do this and so it's like well I mean why did you know it's tough. It's a delayed reaction mistake. Obviously they've probably been together twenty years but still
[31:09] Keith: Right.
[31:18] Keith: Could you make an argument that she should want him to go find sex sexual fulfillment elsewhere right? So maybe not in this particular case but let's say that. I put on £200 and I've been married for 20 years and my partner is like Keith I think you're fucking gross now I mean wouldn't the compassionate and loving thing for me to do wouldn't that be to say to her. You know what you're right? I'm sorry you should go find what. What is a mistress if it's a man go find a mister like isn't that the like compassionate thing to do the the the caring thing to do yeah but.
[31:56] Mike: A Mr a warlock I don't know.
[32:06] Mike: I Don't think I mean I I don't think that the gender dichotomy works that well here because I don't think it's that likely that a woman is going to say that um women are much better like turning their sex drives off, but but if you flip it So It's a woman who has something happened to her and there's a man and her husband. Yeah I Actually think that? Yeah ah I think it would be a compassionate reasonable thing and there's probably some analogous situation if you switch the genders I just have to think about what it is right? where the man is unable to provide something and so it's like hey you know why don't you find that elsewhere or something like that like offer her some way to get that I just. Doubt that it would normally be Sex. You're you're ah hot friends notwithstanding.
[32:44] Keith: Right? I mean I think that people I mean this just isn't how relationships work like Jealousy is sort of baked into it and people would rather their partner be. People would rather their partner have an unsatisfying sex life than have then their partner have sex with other people.
[33:08] Mike: Maybe selfishly so but I mean you could you certainly could imagine I mean there isn't an obligation on both people in a relationship.
[33:15] Keith: Um, like that's what that's what monogamy is built on is this like well yeah, we're going to be with each other forever and we're not going to sleep with anyone else and we know that's non ideal. But for. Both of our own Jealousy's sake. That's what we're going to do.
[33:33] Mike: Yeah I mean this is one of the reasons why I think that it's not completely gender identical I mean ah there are I don't know there. There's some very large fraction of men who are married who have gone to prostitutes and that doesn't mean that they're going to abandon their wives.
[33:46] Keith: Um, yeah, fine.
[33:48] Mike: Or have gone to a strip club and like gone into the champagne room or whatever thing you want to come up with like this is a relatively common occurrence and historically so too I mean you know it's basically throughout all of recorded human history and I've done things like this and it it doesn't prevent the man from fulfilling his husbandly duties. But for a woman to go outside the marriage like that is a little different.
[34:12] Keith: Um, what do you think the ratio is ah men who have had extramarital sex versus women.
[34:13] Mike: Of men that have gone to a prostitute versus not.
[34:24] Mike: Ah, you're you're asking me what percentage. Okay, the ratio. So um, the the okay it's going to be much higher for men. So I'd say 10 to 1 for women. It's going to mean something different of course.
[34:29] Keith: Um, yeah.
[34:35] Keith: Yeah.
[34:41] Mike: Ah, so when a woman starts doing that. That's pretty red flag for a guy. It might not mean anything realistically that I took her to me Keith maybe your two friends. Maybe maybe your two friends could start dating each other. They could just have sex with each other.
[34:45] Keith: Right? right? Yeah, okay under I don't know what I don't know what the ratio is but that might be right anyway, go on.
[35:01] Mike: Should have the ah a benefit of then we don't you know they'd sort of be taking themselves out of the population. They won't.
[35:01] Keith: What if 1 of them what if one of them what if one of them fell for each other then they would just have the same complaint.
[35:12] Mike: It's funny but they've both said they can't see so they they'd be in this sort of weird. Ah logical fallacy. Do they know each other could you introduce them to each other. Oh that you could be Matchmaker look at that He the hedonistic matchmaker.
[35:16] Keith: Um, right now they do not.
[35:25] Keith: I Don't think that would go well. Okay, let's go out to this person and her bikini area. So she wrote a fairly lengthy thing here I am deciding.
[35:30] Mike: All right.
[35:45] Keith: Whether it's worth the well let's just dive in all right? She says what am I doing wrong shaving my bikini area I've asked for advice in the past about the best way to do this I've been following the instructions carefully and it has made no difference I Also let the pubic hair grow out for a considerable amount of time to Try. To ensure I have no inground hairs anywhere and no skin irritation here's my current process. Okay, you ready for this I use baby oil all over to soften the hair I enter the shower and use exolant I use a men shaving cream on the area I use a brand new disposable razor that generally speaking leaves my skin feeling incredibly smooth. She says in other areas I don't know what that means I get at Okay, Okay, oh okay, but it doesn't leave her feeling incredibly smooth in this area. Okay.
[36:23] Mike: Maybe she shaves she shaves other areas. So other areas it works Fine. Yes.
[36:33] Keith: Get out of the shower and after padding dry with the towel I use rubbing alcohol on the area which has a very mild burn at some spots which hinted to me. It was definitely closing pores I wipe in unscented Dove Deodorant strick on the area sparingly to avoid sweat and irritation. Maybe she means antiperspirant not deodorant although does.
[36:50] Mike: The ah the I'm not sure the the couple things the the rubbing alcohol meaning that it's closing pores that sounds like not real to me that sounds like I'd want I'd want to know what a doctor says about that I I doesn't sound right to me.
[36:51] Keith: Dove make antiperspirant.
[36:56] Keith: Are.
[37:04] Keith: That's what after sha ostensibly does right? Yeah, okay.
[37:08] Mike: I don't know but it just sounds weird to me to okay and then in then in terms of the the antiperspirant that's like sort of a a thing I've heard repeatedly is that like that can it but it's not. It's actually what I've heard it read is that it ah it kills bacteria.
[37:22] Keith: Um, the alcohol. Oh.
[37:25] Mike: Well, the anti-perspirant. Whatever kills it's It's deodorant. It's deodorant. It kills Bacteria and so then that reduces the odds of you getting you know inflammation or whatever like spots. Yeah.
[37:32] Keith: okay okay I didn't know that part. Ok all right? So let's see here I've done all these steps and I'm left with a bunch of unattractive red spots all over my bikini area. Anyway, it's the exact same skin sensitivity to past shaves I feel like I can't shave the area again for at least a week and the same ugly red bumps are present within 12 hours for the record I have I'm someone who has very minimal allergies. So I don't consider that to be an element here. What am I doing wrong? Um, and she mentions she has no in growns to get a wax. Um. But she says this is seriously affecting my sex life I refuse to let my boyfriend look at my vagina during sex if I can even bring myself to have it without feeling ugly and I haven't allowed myself to be eaten out in a very very long time I've lost all confidence towards being sexy. My boyfriend doesn't make me feel this way I just literally cannot think about. In regards to sex I refuse to go swimming with people this summer and I just wear shorts in a bikini top to sit by the pool I'm miserable and I can't really afford routine waxing on the budget I'm on right now anyway should just accept I'll never have a porn star vagina. Yeah.
[38:45] Mike: Maybe so I think ah I mean before I heard I figured there was some lack of so this low low cash low cash dimension to this because I think can't you get laser. So that's a thing that you could consider in a situation like this I mean that you probably are just people who have.
[38:46] Keith: Um.
[38:54] Keith: You can get laser. Yeah.
[39:00] Keith: What if pubic hair comes back into style. You can't undo the lasering like like chest hairs back into style I Hope yeah I think it was I have a I have a modest about a chest hair more than you.
[39:02] Mike: A skin sensitivity.
[39:09] Mike: Was it out you hope Okay, well the um okay I have none. Yeah I have the I zero I'm like an Asian Asian man but I'm not Asian I'm I'm ah English more or less. But yeah.
[39:19] Keith: Yeah I know I've I'm aware. Yeah.
[39:26] Mike: Ah, yeah I mean this may it makes sense to me that there're women who would have sensitivity in that area I think that if I I actually know I've never shaved I know and I'm very well aware of the issue of the growth when it grows back in it being very itchy So I'm not inclined to shave that area.
[39:39] Keith: Well yeah, and you'll notice it around if you look at women's as bikini lines like when you're at the beach or the hottow or whatever you'll notice like some are smooth and then some have like sort of razor bumps. Um, you know on the tops of their legs. Yeah, it is.
[39:49] Mike: I Don't know to what is this something that you look for specifically keep. Okay, why? Why do you do that.
[39:57] Keith: I Don't know I think I'm looking for like that smoothness. But also I mean but also it can be a little bit hot if you see some razor bumps because you feel like you're seeing something you're not meant to be.
[39:59] Mike: Oh you don't see. Yeah yeah.
[40:09] Mike: I was thinking that it's like they've put in more effort right? because they've they're they're They're really going through something to get the look. Yeah um I assume that waxing makes it much more smooth like I assume that's actually what porn stars do um.
[40:13] Keith: Oh to be smooth.
[40:24] Keith: Um I don't know Yeah I think I mean you can still get ingrown hairs after waxing. It just takes a little while because the volicles have to grow enough.
[40:34] Mike: That makes sense. Although she's not talking about Ingo and hairs right? She's talking about just general like sort of inflammation after shaving.
[40:40] Keith: Well she mentions ingrown hairs a couple times I mean it's It's sort of both. You can get razor bumps without ingrown hairs and then you can get these little like cystic infection things within grown hairs.
[40:52] Mike: This is this also isn't ah the other thing a thing I think is interesting about this is this isn't just a question of um, having sex This is this is like she can't go out in a bathing suit because of the style of women's bathing suits that's in it.
[41:09] Keith: Right? right? like it. It's not like she could just not shave and and have a bush and and do whatever it's that like she can't even wear a bathing suit because of the the the cut of most suits these days presume that you're shaving everything you're squeaky, clean.
[41:11] Mike: That everybody wears right? So there's this you know.
[41:26] Mike: Or shaving or at least yeah at least sort of shaving That's right? Ah so I mean that's actually kind of um life impact. Well I guess all of it's life impacting but that that that like has an even broader impact on our life. Um.
[41:29] Keith: Ah, right? sorry shaving the majority.
[41:43] Mike: I don't yeah I don't really yeah I don't really know you you would know more I mean you, you've shaved more stuff than I have right? Well like what to do.
[41:47] Keith: Um, she. What's the question I don't know somebody. There's an edit here that I mean I don't have this problem so that this person says here's what you should do. Foliate then rub the area with baby oil. So that's the same before you shave to soften the hair and screen skinned shave using a men's razor one with 4 blades and men's moisturizing shaving cream since they are made for faces. They are extra gentle. Deb some rubbing alcohol on the skin after you shave to kill bacteria and close your pores. So I don't know if that's right or not That's what this person says then apply deodorant and uncented of stick works best liberally this will keep you dry down there so you won't chafe and prevents Razor Bumps you'll have the smoothest jiny ever? Yeah, ah.
[42:22] Mike: Good bit.
[42:34] Mike: It's in that exactly what she did. Okay.
[42:37] Keith: There's a couple differences there. She's using a different razor the shaving cream I think is different. This person says I was a dancer for 4 years and did this almost daily no problems.
[42:47] Mike: Yeah I mean I think this is one of these things that come. It's like ah this comes down to individual difference like people people don't people are really in our culture maybe in all cultures really uncomfortable with the idea that people aren't all the same. Yeah.
[43:00] Keith: Yeah I can't shave my face every day and it just gets I get I get red bombs. Yeah it it gets irritated.
[43:03] Mike: What what happens.
[43:10] Mike: Okay, yeah, so that's right? So then you have to you have to make this. Ah maybe there could be like a but so what do you do you basically use a thing that that did yeah clipper a clipper that keeps it at like say a couple millimeters of length right.
[43:23] Keith: I did that for like for like 15 years I didn't shave once but I started shaving again a couple years ago and now I don't use the clipper anymore I just shave like once every 3 or 4 days. There's some issues with that actually ah like on on days 3 and 4
[43:33] Mike: Okay, ah so I mean what are the issues.
[43:41] Keith: I Have like my facial hair is fairly coarse and so kissing me I think can be a bit painful and then you know people will say like.
[43:53] Mike: That's excluding the emotional pain the trauma I hear you? Ah so yeah I mean women could try to bring into vogue some notion of like I'm imagining some something like a five o'clock shadow for their bikini area could be something they could.
[43:56] Keith: There is no emotional pain of kissing me. It's only only joy.
[44:10] Keith: Um, it would at least give a more runway but I mean the problem is yeah, the bikinis are cut so that that that five o'clock shadow would be visible. Um, and so yeah, so like when women go on you know their vacations to some beach area. Are they.
[44:11] Mike: Bring into vogue.
[44:19] Mike: Right.
[44:27] Keith: Shaving every morning.
[44:29] Mike: Presumably Yes, unless they're waxed. It's something they have to think about right? I mean that's yeah, straightforward right? Yeah well they want to look as childlike as possible.
[44:33] Keith: Um, and some people's hair grows at different speeds. But yeah man, what a chore.
[44:43] Mike: That's that's when I see the women at the beach as I did today in their bikinis. That's what I think I think like wow these they're really making an effort to look sort of childlike. They're rounded their bodies are rounded. They have no hair. That's what's wanted.
[44:52] Keith: Yeah, well youth is always and forever positive selector. All right? Let's talk about herpes you ready all right? This person says I'm positive for Hs At H S V one
[45:04] Mike: Yeah, yeah.
[45:11] Keith: I'm hooking up with tinder date in a week very nervous about reaction. What should I do like the title says I've tested positive for Hsv one the most common of the hsv complex infections and I'm scared to tell my potential new sexual partner I met them on tinder and they're long distance so they're coming to my area to meet me for the first time and potentially hook up. Guessing. He's hoping it's not potential. Although once he finds this out anyway, she goes on of course I will tell them because it's the right thing to do but I'm afraid they'll stop speaking to me or think I'm unclean this person doesn't even want to get vaccinated for reasons I don't understand niche I asked them.
[45:46] Mike: What's the using? What's the using the word them again and again because it's not clear the genders here all right.
[45:48] Keith: Um I think they are yeah, it's and it's ambiguous.
[45:52] Mike: Oh my gosh. So I mean this could be 2 non biary people can two can nonbinary people have sex with each other. Do they have some sort of like puzzle piece instead of a penis or a vagina they got. It's like kind of a it's like a lego contraption that fits into the other.
[46:08] Keith: I Got a tetris it in there. Um yes, ah and nonbinary people can indeed have sex this person doesn't even want to get vaccinated for reasons that don't understand well it depends it depends how you're nonbinary.
[46:12] Mike: I don't know. Okay.
[46:16] Mike: How how are you? So sure of that go on.
[46:25] Keith: Well, you can identify as non-binary and still have a sexual organ.
[46:29] Mike: Okay, okay so nonbinary people have a gendered sexual organ that they just don't like to talk about and then.
[46:35] Keith: Not all of them I think some nonbinary people remove their sexual organs.
[46:41] Mike: Um, so then then they can't right because it's gone.
[46:43] Keith: I Yeah I don't know what sex is like when you don't have sexual organs I regret the confidence.
[46:47] Mike: Well, you very confidently said that they do so yeah I mean if they and if they don't want to talk about what it is then does that mean and this is sort of interesting. It's like a double crying game situation where it's like a surprise for both of them. Let's say there's 2 Yeah, that must be actually in some ways that's kind of fun right? It's like you.
[47:00] Keith: Right.
[47:07] Mike: You're like okay, we're going to do yeah so go with some of what you got all right.
[47:07] Keith: Let's see what you're working with I mean if you're pansexual or whatever you know, maybe you can find attraction and even just a little and just a little Barbie waste down there. There's no sexual organs or or holes.
[47:17] Mike: Oh no.
[47:23] Mike: Oh you mean like a Barbie crotch. What would you what would you do if you were going to have sex with a woman and that was what was there just an anus would you and you'd say what happened or.
[47:25] Keith: Whatsoever.
[47:31] Keith: I would be disappointed and confused. I mean I think it would probably come up. Yeah.
[47:46] Keith: What that's that's something you could just blow by and ignore right like it's like oh I was planning on going down on you but like what do I do now do it just lick the little nub here or like what what's going out. Ok now this has not This is not um, all right I asked.
[47:50] Mike: You're like how how do you pee? Okay, so this hasn't happened to you This is your imagining here. Okay, good. Okay.
[48:04] Keith: Them to get an Sti panel before we had sex and they obliged and I planned to send them my results H I V Syus Gonorrhea etc really worried about what they might think I have a negative panel Otherwise I know it's common but not so sure they'd understand and will feel like not telling them but can't shake feeling wrong thoughts. So um, all right.
[48:24] Mike: Um, I feel like the gender matters here like isn't it. No it does because isn't it. It's more likely to be asymptomatic for a man right.
[48:33] Keith: I think there's a difference between hsv one and hsv two I think one is oral herpes and I don't know if it can jump to Hsv 2 if you like like if you have a sore.
[48:38] Mike: Okay, okay.
[48:51] Keith: And then you go down on someone. Can you get genital herpes I don't know I don't know.
[48:53] Mike: Okay, well according to Google 50 67% of people under age fifty globally have Hsv one which is the main cause of oral herpes. So if you have something that 50 60 SixtySevenPercent of people have.
[49:12] Keith: Um.
[49:12] Mike: Then it's more than fifty fifty this other person has it too may or may not know they have it. Um, it also says now Johns Hopkins says that Hsv one can cause genital herpes. So I'm not I'm a little confused I don't have a whole lot of herpes knowledge to be honest with you I know I know there's no cure and there's things they.
[49:26] Keith: Yeah me they are I mean if it's if it's 67% for an arbitrary person that means there's like a 45% chance that you and I both have it. How do you know.
[49:32] Mike: Have on like the ads.
[49:38] Mike: I Definitely don't I Just don't I'm a clean marine I don't even use toilet seats.
[49:43] Keith: My understanding is you can't even test for it I have I don't know if I've had it or not I've never tested positive and I've never had a sore but like how can you be certain beyond that I think they can only test it I think they can only test if you have a sore and then they like I don't know if they drain the.
[49:54] Mike: I Don't know.
[50:02] Mike: Um, well then how are they? How do they confidently say that 67% of people have it if they can't even test for it.
[50:03] Keith: Lesion or whatever I don't know I don't know I think they can test for it. But there's so many strains that testing negative doesn't necessarily mean you don't have it. That's my wreck but that's my recollection.
[50:15] Mike: But this's just bullshit then okay, so look then then there is okay well when you tested but maybe it goes away. How do you know? Well, how do they know I mean look this is like Schrodinger's sti I say don't tell.
[50:19] Keith: But what if you test positive you're positive if you test positive you do have it. No, it can be dormant though. It can be dormant.
[50:33] Mike: Don't tell it doesn't make any difference everybody already has it and they could You're you're saying oh it if it goes So if if it if you test negative later, you still have it? Well, how do they know? how do you know? How do you know you didn't it didn't go away and then come back.
[50:43] Keith: Oh that's true. You have plausible deniability. You can say you got it from somebody else. Sorry they got it from somebody else.
[50:47] Mike: It just I mean this just this just sounds like right? This just sounds like a thing that everybody has so it's just like it doesn't make any difference.
[50:55] Keith: Yeah, that is my general read on this I Think if you have a a herpe set is that what is is a herpe another word for a cold soar.
[51:04] Mike: I think it had wouldn't It couldn't be the herp because the herp is just a synonym for herpes right? So a herp herpetic cyst. Maybe you're saying if you have actually like a visible lesion.
[51:08] Keith: Right.
[51:16] Keith: Yeah I mean it's well you should probably mention it because if they find it and you haven't mentioned it. It's going to be bad news.
[51:26] Mike: Yeah I I mean I guess you could mention it. But it's just and I'm not sure because that you know, ah here's something though if you bring it up the reaction of the person will tell you something about them because if they would it would show you how rational right? So you could talk about it.
[51:32] Keith: Um, yeah.
[51:39] Keith: Um, well most people aren't educated on this most people aren't educated. Yeah.
[51:43] Mike: You could talk about it and see how good they are at critical thinking how they're able to understand it and if they just respond in an irrational way. Ah then.
[51:51] Keith: Um, well most people especially young people probably don't like hearing the words I have herpes.
[51:58] Mike: Um, but apparently everybody you know, effectively everyone does except me.
[51:59] Keith: Yeah I know I've seen numbers that are higher than 67% but I don't I don't know how you even test for it.
[52:08] Mike: Yeah, so I mean I Yeah but so in that sense I mean it would be good if if you're interested in cultivating a relationship. It might be a good way to find out what kind of person they are and then you're sort of being honest at the same time so that I'm not sure. There's a huge downside there.
[52:22] Keith: Right? right? I Wonder what like the planned Parenthood Web site says about telling people. Ah I Just think that in general if you told people you're going to run into problems.
[52:39] Mike: That's true I mean there's some things that are better.
[52:40] Keith: Especially men telling women like if a man has it like I think almost all women would nope out and then just go find another man in line that doesn't have it or super or claims he doesn't have it. Oh boy.
[52:48] Mike: This reminds me of the of the most this reminds me of the most recent episode of the bachelorette where one of the 3 remaining guys they were this is I mean this is just terrible. Yeah, so they're gonna have sex right and like the chick clearly wanted to have sex with this guy and so I don't.
[53:00] Keith: Um, oh it's fantasy sweet week. Okay, yeah, where they don't need.
[53:08] Mike: Anyway, So at the dinner So I guess they have a dinner I've watched this show that many times this the second season I've watched they're not allowed to eat Why not.
[53:15] Keith: They are but they never do I don't know I don't know if they eat beforehand but the meals just like sit there and they never touch him. They drink the wine though.
[53:23] Mike: Okay, okay, so they get drunk but she's supposed ostensibly deciding during this meal whether or not she's going to have sex with the guy and then she has a card that she can give them if she wants to this guy.
[53:34] Keith: Um I Guess yeah.
[53:40] Mike: The whole the whole situation was insane. This guy brought up that in the past he had been unfaithful in a relationship right? right? Obviously this would be a good thing to say say the next day like he's like by the way.
[53:45] Keith: Why is he self-s saottaging like this. He's saying this on the date before he's going to get laid like read the room buddy. Yeah.
[53:59] Mike: And then the other thing that was sort of interesting was that she yeah she just noped out. It's like look like you understand there's only 2 possibilities here with all the guys you have remaining. They either tell you this that all of them have been unfaithful in a relationship.
[54:11] Keith: Yeah, these guys are all they're on a television show that being a hot philanderer is almost a requirement.
[54:19] Mike: Sort of so I mean then you know her her reaction just shows like a lack of critical thinking. It's kind of the same situation right? He's told her something that should be a no op but she's decided to go nuts now fair. That's fair.
[54:30] Keith: I'm not surprised though. Mike I mean they psychologically profile these people to be psychologically damaged because it makes makes for better television right? right.
[54:38] Mike: Right? in incoherent and incapable of normal dialogue. Ah anyway, but yeah, and and then right the the strategic error he ah and also he was the first one out of the 3 So. There's no crusty stale. Leftovers coming from the other guys like he could have been the Crusty stale leftover for the other guys right? so.
[54:54] Keith: Man he is getting the pristine vagina. Do they go is it 3 nights in a row or is there like a night in between man.
[55:04] Mike: It must be some time in between otherwise I mean there are all kinds of problems. It seems like if you were going first. Yeah, if you're going first like it would probably make sense to try to make her store right? kind of work that thing.
[55:11] Keith: Yeah, she'll be she'll be tired maybe sore.
[55:19] Keith: Yeah, this could go dark quickly. Yeah yeah, a little bit of bruising. Yeah.
[55:21] Mike: Like if you're if you are if you're on the bachelor on the bachelor like it would make some sense if you were the first woman to just give him some some Hickey or like some teeth marks but I she has like a she gets like a.
[55:30] Keith: Um, right? yes him scratches on his back or or elsewhere.
[55:37] Mike: She gets like a thing on her like let's hear her name is Stacy she gets a thing on her teeth that says Stacy was here and like and like puts that on his dick somehow.
[55:45] Keith: Yeah, it's it's alpha, it's pro move. Um all right I think we have time to do this pissing one. Um, this person wonders should I piss on my girlfriend. We'd been out for a walk and cut soaked in the rain and I hopped in the shower to warm up she got in with me and as you expect. We started to get into it. She was going down on me and I said I needed to pee when I went to get out of the shower. She held onto my cock and told me to use it on her face instead of using the toilet I laughed it off and used the toilet. It had never come up before and I didn't think she was serious anyway, I didn't think much about it again until last night when we were in bed. Thanks for getting sexual again and she paused and said something like I was being serious in the shower I'd like you to piss on me. We were in bed so just had sex but I'm now on the fence about what to do next I'm sort of interested by the idea but not exactly turned on by it anyone done this before advice welcome and before you respond. Basically everyone has the same take as the first person which is here's my take especially in the shower nobody is possibly hurt here. There's no mess. Whatever um, and then he says if you aren't. Actually averse to trying this I think that you should give it a shot. It's ah, almost It's always awesome to do things for your partner that they are into even if you aren't um is that true I mean look okay philosophically there's something that doesn't affect me at all.
[57:11] Keith: And makes your experience much better. Okay I should obviously do that but can you be sure that it won't affect you at all.
[57:16] Mike: No, you can't because I mean aside from I think I don't think he was doing a whole lot of deep thinking here in the shower but I do I do imagine that he he probably just had general squeamish issues like that makes me a little uncomfortable which makes sense to me but it would be reasonable if 1 thought about it for a while.
[57:25] Keith: Um.
[57:32] Keith: Um, yeah.
[57:36] Mike: To say hey this may become something I have to do a lot and it may not be something that you want to be doing a lot and so there could be this kind of uncomfortable situation that arises if you agree to it? Um, so there is a downside I mean what? if what if this was you know.
[57:37] Keith: Bright.
[57:54] Mike: Yeah, now he starts having to do this all the time That's right? and.
[57:54] Keith: Yeah, you don't know how slippery the slope is right starts it starts innocuously in the shower and then next it's she's cooking in a asparagus casserole and demanding you pee on her in bed right? You know it's there's.
[58:12] Mike: That's interesting. Have you have you encountered somebody who wanted asparagus Pee specifically is that like a thing no have you read about him is is that I've never actually considered that somebody would want flavored golden shower.
[58:13] Keith: Different. Yeah.
[58:19] Keith: I haven't encountered. Ah.
[58:27] Keith: Um, would you know there's some like enzyme and asparagus or something that makes your your p Okay, yeah, um I don't know. Yeah, do they want it amped up. Do they want it more demeaning more more stinky.
[58:29] Mike: Oh I know I just didn't know if a woman would want that would would to be to be honest I always assumed it was men that wanted this not women. It's a little surprising to me that a woman would be interesting I mean it might just be a 1 time thing you know. Although on her face somewhat less likely.
[58:49] Keith: Yeah, face is not where I would start I don't know where I would start nowhere I don't I don't want to do this? no.
[58:57] Mike: Oh you don't so you would actually say no if this if if you were if this was offered to you or desired.
[59:04] Keith: If it was offered to me I would say no if it was requested of me I would consider it I I agree that that is probably what you would do.
[59:11] Mike: I think I would immediately do it I mean like okay because it doesn't really hurt me although I do see the downside the long term downside of like oh now I have to pee on you all the time.
[59:24] Keith: Right? Yeah, it could be a chore after a while you always have to make sure you're well hydrated and you never know when you're going to when the request is going to come.
[59:34] Mike: Yes, yeah, it's sort of worrisome. Yeah, but I mean I think I think in most cases, a guy would just do it because it's like you. You know you want to sort of see masculine and like you can you can You're up for anything and it really doesn't affect you play all right.
[59:48] Keith: Some people lauded her for somebody says she didn't just want it. She wants it enough that she brought it up later after it was left off. That's good communication in a serious act of trust on her part. Yeah.
[01:00:02] Mike: That's true. Well it could open the door to something else right? I mean like what if look here's the thing Keith what if let's say that you had a crystal ball and you knew like okay you wouldn't immediately say yes in the shower. But let's say that I told you that the next request was going to be a 3 hree -way with her hot friend then you would see and that's the thing so like saying generally I think that men if a woman wants to do something just are like yes because you figure like always keep the door open like why we if you say no, then you're basically you're you're rejecting.
[01:00:20] Keith: Um, yeah.
[01:00:29] Keith: Right? Yeah, but let's keep knocking down the dominoes and see see what what comes? Yeah yeah, that sounds right? all right? We're over time here so that will do it for this episode of your mileage may vary.
[01:00:37] Mike: That's right? which I think is sensible.
[01:00:47] Keith: If you didn't like some of the things Mike had to say earlier in this episode just keep in mind that's not my fault. He just you know he's he's a man I can't can't can't can't control it. Ah we cherish feedback. Ah maybe we need well especially negative feedback since.
[01:00:52] Mike: Really.
[01:01:06] Keith: That's the most interesting and most actionable. So if you have any hit us up. We pay $10 for any feedback. Even if it's short. Just let us know if you want Paypal or cash app or whatever it is. You can also ask us questions and we'll answer them on the air unless you tell us not to. Ah, the email address for all that stuff is y mmv pod at Gmail.com thank you for listening and we look forward to catching you next week on your mileage may vary.

YMMVYour Mileage May Vary

Episode 130: Younger Mistresses, Herpes Prevalence, Golden Spigots, Proper Bikini Shaving, Truth

Episode Transcript