Your Mileage May Vary: Regretful Camgirls And Politicians, Somnophilia, Extenders, Too Much Free Use?

Episode Transcript

Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.

[00:00] Keith: Hello and welcome to your mileage may vary. We talk about sex and relationships with frankness that is mostly in good faith but often controversial on today's program we're going to discuss sexual interactions with people who are sleeping penis extenders free use and more I am Keith my co-host is mike. Mike You told me you have something good to kick off the show with today.
[00:24] Mike: I do um there is so'm one of my sad predilections is using Tiktok and although you've admitted that you use Instagram's equivalent product because you feel like Mark Zuckerberg's curation is better than um, the chinese ah.
[00:35] Keith: Reels.
[00:39] Keith: Now it's not. It's not that I think is curation is better. In fact I bet Tiktok is a slightly better product. But I don't know I don't like that the Ccp may control bye dance which is the owner of Tiktok.
[00:41] Mike: Ah, communist party.
[00:46] Mike: Okay, okay, but.
[00:54] Mike: I Think it makes it funnier in any event this is so there is an account. There is an account of a now. Yeah, we've discussed what a thirst trap is on on the show in the past. It's a usually young woman who posts non pornographic but sort of alluring.
[00:58] Keith: Yeah, in any way.
[01:05] Keith: Yes, yes.
[01:14] Mike: Ah, short videos and the like online to attract men typically to a what they might call a spicy page and only fans page. So I'm going to show you a couple of ah what I think are thirst traps of of a woman A lovely young woman. Can you see my phone. Okay here.
[01:30] Keith: I Can a while? yes.
[01:33] Mike: And you see the one at the bottom. It's like kind of the brady bunch here. You can see a series of photos. Why don't you describe the the bottom the one that my fingers over right? there.
[01:42] Keith: The one where she's ah wiggling her torso back and forth which is creating a wobbling effect with her breasts.
[01:47] Mike: So I clicked on it and you notice what she's wearing. Can you describe that.
[01:53] Keith: I'm actually a little confused is there it it appears to be a bikini but there's no strap connecting the 2 um bra cups.
[02:03] Mike: That's right? So this woman has extraordinarily large breasts and she often will wear something that looks like some kind of ah a toga or something that kind of holds them up holds her breasts up but kind of.
[02:16] Keith: Um, yeah huh.
[02:19] Mike: Leaves a gap in between them and so this seems to be 1 of her typical moves and I've seen her before on the on the site her username on Tiktok is court Ceo o URT so maybe your name is Courtney I don't know she has other ones that's true.
[02:31] Keith: What's a good username I'm surprised she was able to get that she must have been around for a while.
[02:36] Mike: She has other ones you know I mean she has like some text here but they're all just sort of highlighting her breast. She has a ah very blond hair Blue eyes and you know she's on ah all the platforms I Assume you've not seen her before on your platform of choice.
[02:42] Keith: Um, yeah.
[02:48] Keith: I have not she's she's very pretty I would say the feature attraction though is her chest.
[02:56] Mike: Okay, so she posted yesterday. Ah 19 hours ago even a video that is titled the dark truth of my only fans experience now. It's 3 minutes long so I don't know if you want to listen to the whole thing. But um I'm going to play some of it and maybe you can stop.
[03:09] Keith: Um, yeah.
[03:13] Mike: Ah, when when you think we've gotten the gist and um so it's called the dark truth of my only fans experience. So here we go I marked the day where I have made over a million dollars on only fans I want to talk about what I wish I knew things I regret.
[03:14] Keith: Okay, okay I'm ready.
[03:31] Mike: And just in general knowledge about everything I've learned throughout the process of being an only fans girl for about two and a half years so when I started my only fans in 2020 during the pandemic I was in kind of a crazy place in my life I felt very alone I was financially.
[03:38] Keith: Okay.
[03:50] Mike: Unsure of where my life was going and I was in a very very very low spot. I had a very close friends just me that I should start social media and start Nullie fans and start just to see what would happen I Just wish there had been somebody to tell me about the things that come with it. As they say there are no free lunches in life and making a big big income on only fans comes with a huge price. So as crazy as it is where I'm in a financial position I feel very sad.
[04:16] Keith: Who.
[04:23] Mike: You know the internet does last forever and these are things I can never take back One of the biggest things too is that I have lost the ability to have yes that was a good part there. But oh well, she's hang on the next bit thing she says I think is important. Let's let's just quickly do that and then we can talk about it. Yeah.
[04:27] Keith: Wait okay can you pause is she's just Goingnna winene. Okay, okay, all right, let's go. Let's go. Okay.
[04:43] Mike: 1 of the biggest things too is that I have lost the ability to have a real relationship in a family every single guy that I date now knows about this I'll find out about this and it's something I'm going to have to explain to my children and. It's going to be difficult so it goes on and on and it goes on and on like that that was we we listen to about half of it. Um, and just in case you didn't catch it at the beginning a couple of points one is that she is making this video on the anniversary of her making $1000000 ah presumably of I mean that's before tax who knows if.
[05:02] Keith: Okay.
[05:15] Keith: I caught that? yeah.
[05:21] Mike: Probably only vends makes you pay tax. So that's probably actually half a million dollars depending on what state she lives in um and second thing she ah 3 hours after posting that video was back posting a video of herself with her boobs hanging out there.
[05:35] Keith: Um, right right.
[05:39] Mike: And then another one just 3 hours ago now another one in so so on and so forth. So it's just she hasn't stopped producing this content. What are your thoughts on what what you heard there.
[05:52] Keith: Um I don't understand what the concern is like okay, let's say she has let's say she has a daughter Okay like why is it embarrassing to tell the daughter like hey.
[06:01] Mike: Um, yeah.
[06:07] Keith: I figured out a way to monetize my beauty when I was young and made $1000000 like what is what is what is it? That's bad about that. Well I think that she thinks.
[06:12] Mike: Um, Thrive and.
[06:16] Mike: What do you think? or do you want me to answer do you? What do you think.
[06:25] Keith: I Mean ostensibly she thinks she's like a sexually liberated person and that she doesn't think that body shaming should be a thing and so while it's certainly true that she's getting judged for what she's done I think it's inconsistent to yeah like ah. I Don't think people should care what? ah puritanical folks think about them sharing their bodies are like it is true that some men are going to see that stuff or know that she does that stuff and not be interested in her because of that but shouldn't she want to filter those people out anyway because they're not. Um, sex work positive to the extent that what she's doing could even be considered sex work it it. It probably is.
[07:09] Mike: It's a fair point I mean it's a fair point that she ah on that sex point sex work point I mean she let's just assume that she hasn't actually engaged in escorting or anything like that and I have no indication that she has so let's just stipulate that then.
[07:19] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
[07:25] Mike: Yeah I mean it's It's pretty fine line there I mean she may not you many people might not even consider it sex work I mean there's not that much of a difference between what she presumably on only fans I'm going to assume that she posted. Ah you know graphic sex scenes not just these sort of alluring taste try taste or straps my pet.
[07:42] Keith: Thirst traps.
[07:44] Mike: Thir straps ah and this by the way. Um I guess I should mention in this this week um a woman I think did I send you this I did a woman running for the Virginia house of delegates which is their congress. Yes.
[07:57] Keith: House of representatives. Yeah, there's their state Their state congress.
[08:03] Mike: Right has been outed for having she's running as a democrat and she's been outed for having a pretty active chatterbait presence making money with that with her husband on that. Um your comment. Yeah.
[08:10] Keith: He has yeah she was camming she was camming with her husband and the nature of her camming is yeah she's like having sex with him and it's the normal sort of chatter bait thing where. People give you tips money but money tips if you do like they'll request that you do something and then if you do it, they'll give you a tip.
[08:37] Mike: I actually didn't think it was the I mean I I may ah be more of an expert at Chatterbait than you are in terms of as a viewer and I didn't think it was I didn't think it was the most typical ah type of chatterbake content. Um, and if I feel like it'll post I know I know.
[08:44] Keith: I I think so.
[08:56] Mike: Because I get data on this that if I post in the show notes links to the videos that those will be the most clicked things we have all year but ah, ah they it's more of a hotlife type thing so actually was more. It's not.
[09:00] Keith: Yeah, yeah, it's reliably the case.
[09:14] Mike: Trying to elicit tips. The stuff she was doing as much and then there's 1 in particular that he was putting his his her husband was putting his finger up her butt and kind of very obviously with yeah without any lube pretty obviously and um, it didn't it almost wasn't sexual was kind of bizarre. It was like what.
[09:19] Keith: Yeah, she was complaining about it hurting. Yeah.
[09:31] Mike: Yeah, he's just sort of poking it up in there. But okay, she the the main point here is that she now is facing criticism from various quarters for having produced that content and so it's a little bit similar right? I mean there there here you have like fast fast forward I think this woman this woman running for office maybe in her forty s in your fast forward. You have.
[09:48] Keith: Yeah.
[09:51] Mike: In fact, someone being I guess Slut shamed when trying to do something in their life. So it's yeah.
[09:55] Keith: Yeah, importantly, she's a democratic candidate and the republicans her Republican opposition is the one who leaked this and are trying to do the shaming here and her defense has so far been.
[10:08] Mike: Sure. So.
[10:12] Keith: This is a smear campaign I was having sex with my husband. What's wrong with that blah Blah blah.
[10:18] Mike: I so I think that's what she's said so far. Yeah, but okay so you you have difficulty understanding I mean I think that I think that what's going on with this young lady on um Tiktok is she's whole I don't think it's that.
[10:33] Mike: I Think she's holding up to herself up to a standard that's in her own mind. It's not that she's being shamed by other people. It's that she is holding herself up to her own standard and I think that standard and I said something about this last episode really is ah she's imagining what she would want her own kid to do. And she's thinking. Oh So why wouldn't she have that conversation with her kid because she doesn't want her kid to be a cam girl. That's why like.
[10:55] Keith: Yeah I think this this stuff. Okay, who think about what I want to say here I think that women are often misogynist and and they would like find it outrageous for me to like start a spiel like that. But like.
[11:03] Mike: So.
[11:15] Keith: You see this on seeking all the time so seeking for our newer listeners is a sugar daddy matching website and ah, you'll see profiles on there all the time where the women say I'm not just a pretty face I'm a really good conversationalist and it's like you would never.
[11:31] Mike: Sure yeah.
[11:34] Keith: See that on a man's profile like a man wouldn't say like oh I'm smart right? like like by saying by saying there are good conversationalists. They're implying that most women aren't like the thing that separates them is that they're not an idiot.
[11:39] Mike: It would actually if somebody if somebody wrote that on their um yeah.
[11:46] Mike: Think that's interesting.
[11:50] Keith: Like they're they're revealing their own bias.
[11:51] Mike: I actually don't think they're implying that I think they're just trying to 2 things first I wanted to say that if a guy put that on his profile. It would immediately be taken his humor. It would be taken as like oh that you know he's just joking I mean they know like I like oh that's funny. He's implying. That no one could ever find a guy say ah that a guy is a pretty face but blah. There's like a joke in there and secondly um I don't think I think I think that she's she's not implying the most I don't think that's what she's implying. She's in she's trying to push back against the idea that all that matters is her looks.
[12:10] Keith: Right.
[12:22] Keith: I Don't know that's not right. It's not that we disagree. It's that like I've seen thousands of profiles that I think my understanding of the situation is better like the women subtly are constantly putting down other profiles. They're trying to say what separates them.
[12:24] Mike: Okay, we disagree. That's fine.
[12:42] Keith: And the thing that separates them are normal things like oh I Sometimes read it's like that's not that's like that you think that most women don't is misogynist and so the reason why I bring this up is she.
[12:54] Mike: Okay, okay.
[13:00] Keith: Is doing this camming. She claims to be sort of feeling this pressure. But for starters she has $1000000 rolling in. So obviously most people seem to be okay with it. Ah, and then.
[13:09] Mike: Um, well she you're saying she should keep doing it another because she she doesn't like in the videos or the thirst traps I've seen like I don't see any reason why she would if it's been two and a half year or yeah, two and a half years or maybe a year and a half she said. And she's made $1000000 I would say okay well she should be able to make 2 or three more million dollars before maybe those breasts start sagging too much or something. Yeah.
[13:32] Keith: Yeah, sorry I guess I haven't yeah I buried the lead here. Yeah I definitely think she should keep keep doing this or at least not feel shame about it. I mean look there's sort of 3 possible constituents that would be upset that she did this one is a potential future mate and if he. Can't tolerate that she did that she should next him anyway. So that doesn't matter like if some guy she meets is like oh I wish you were you know more church going like I don't know why she would be interested in that person in the first place person 2 is like would be child. And yeah, same like she should teach her children to be like strong confident people and to sort of like reject the puritanical culture that you know is sort of everywhere and then the third would be a would be employer and ah yeah, for starters I don't know what state she lives in but in California. If you found out that an employer rejected you because of like your only fans page you just sue them and now she has $2000000 like it's there's no risk of it like if you applied to Google okay, and they you found out. They didn't hire you because some senior manager found your only fans page. Oh my god that's such an like easy windfall and so like I don't I just don't understand what the yeah like what? what the even like hypothetical concern is other than that she feels some embarrassment.
[14:55] Keith: About what she's done and I don't think she should but I think she does feel that.
[14:56] Mike: Okay, so so I'd like to investigate a little bit your ah your anti-sham. You're basically saying she should not feel shame or it's inappropriate for her to feel shame. Um, let's say so you were not willing when we had a listener offer. Certain amount of money. There is an amount of money where you would give a man a blowjob. Let's say that you found out that you could make a million dollars a year by doing something kind of raunchy with your anus on camera and your face is visible like a lot and your parents would know and everybody would know like your your view is you should do that.
[15:16] Keith: Correct.
[15:24] Keith: Ah.
[15:33] Mike: To get that million but or say ten million a year whatever
[15:33] Keith: I'm not sure I'm not sure yes 10000000 for sure. Yeah, there's some number where yes I I think it's it's basically a responsible not to do it.
[15:41] Mike: And you would say to everybody like look fuck off like yeah I've got this money and you don't Okay, okay, um, so it's so then it's just a question of how much but there is some it matters. There is some shame.
[15:43] Keith: Yeah I'll so I'll see you in on my yacht.
[15:54] Keith: Not only that Mike Mike it's not only that it's it's not just that. Okay, there would be a little bit of shame for sure. But that's what the money's for um, but I don't even know if they're well I'm not even sure there should be shape for sure. Our culture would make me.
[16:00] Mike: Okay.
[16:10] Mike: Yes.
[16:11] Keith: Try to feel shame. Ah yeah, but I'm not sure I would want to be friends with anyone who would depend a little bit but generally if someone was like I can't believe you did that you're you know your're.
[16:30] Keith: You've you've cited with the devil or whatever or aren aren't you embarrassed that people have seen the inside of your of your anus I would just say no and I think it's super obvious that I like I have $60000000 in my bank account now because I've been doing this for 6 years like why.
[16:47] Mike: Okay, what let's say let's say I'm just trying to like probably the outer limits here. Let's say there was no risk of of violence toward you when there was no jail time but to get the $10000000 you have to live the rest of your life. Basically as Jared the subway guy.
[16:48] Keith: But you're an idiot for thinking that I shouldn't have done this like it.
[16:59] Keith: Ah, okay.
[17:05] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
[17:07] Mike: So everybody in the world literally actually everybody knows that you're a pedophile and they know your face because you were all over these commercials. So every time you walk in a room. It's like oh that pedophile like there is a point where the shame would matter right.
[17:13] Keith: Yeah.
[17:21] Mike: Like I wouldn't I wouldn't make that trade I think either, you'd just be too lame or or like or you have to be oj simpson you know you get a bunch of money but it's like oh now I have to be Oj simpson I mean they should yeah.
[17:26] Keith: Yeah, right, everyone hates me ah in O J's case. Yes, sorry let me be clear Also injure its case.
[17:37] Mike: Yes, yes, we've had some some issues with that in the last few weeks but yes we are opposed to pedophilia in all forms. Yes.
[17:44] Keith: Yes, we are Ah, ah yeah, ah there are certain boundaries. Yeah I wouldn't want to like be a pariah for my entire life. There's there's there's some edge there that I wouldn't want to go over.
[17:58] Mike: Um, okay, but you don't think it's possible that a for women the way that their kid sees them is like that is that kind of an edge. So it's in in other words, it's not. It's not society exactly it's that they're they're deeply afraid of their daughter.
[18:14] Keith: Maybe maybe even probably but she should inspect her thoughts about how she feels about sex work or camming generally and if she's embarrassed by it. She shouldn't fucking do it and she could have known this.
[18:15] Mike: You know, not looking up to them or something.
[18:26] Mike: Um, yeah.
[18:28] Mike: Well, that's sort of her That's actually your point in the video.
[18:33] Keith: She could have known this in prospect like she's like oh I wish I would have known. It's like what how did you not know like your choices were you do this and it's unsuccessful and nobody finds out about it or you do this and you are successful and lots of people find out about it. There is no middle ground there where you're successful and people don't find out about it. And she should have known this in prospect and complaining about it in retrospect seems um ah misguided unsympathetic.
[18:55] Mike: Right? Yeah and I mean I guess I would say to our listeners that that's this is to some extent a ah, a question that both Keith and I have had to think about in our own lives with this show because as it be as it with hooks.
[19:09] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
[19:13] Mike: Success of the show could put us in some kind of similar situation and particularly in sort of with the ah the kind of woke nature of things when anytime 1 of us says something that would you could you could get flak from both sides at the point of' making you get flak from people who say why? do you? Why are you involved in a sex and relationship podcast or. And why did you say penis and clit and stuff or talk about porn online on on on the internet and then on the other side of like well you're a misogynist. So basically everybody hates you? Yeah I mean becoming well-known basically often involves people hating you um and and you're right that it's a little strange people wouldn't know that's part of the bargain. The other point. The only other point I would make is that.
[19:33] Keith: Um, yeah.
[19:50] Mike: Ah, for the average person getting a million bucks is so much money that um yeah I mean it's it's maybe 20 years of income for her and so that makes it challenging and I can see how people think oh well? Well I'm going to be able to.
[19:58] Keith: Um, right.
[20:07] Mike: Handle this because I'll have all this money and to them. It's this massive amount of money She may now be figuring out that that's not quite as much money as she hoped.
[20:12] Keith: Ah I see right? or that the blowback is more than she'd imagined.
[20:17] Mike: Yeah, as well. I mean your lifestyle you know there are there are various people who argue and I think you and I have debated this that if you make like $70000 a year that's enough. Maybe it's eighty now so that your life is basically and indistinguishable from somebody who makes like a million dollars a year like you. Most of what you do in life is kind of the same this is you can debate it a bit but like maybe she's sort of finding that out. It's like oh so so like there's um, what do they call? There's an economic concept there where like you you as you get more and more of something the incremental value goes down and so it's sort of like she's like well I would've rather had $100000 and have.
[20:55] Keith: My life back right? Yeah I mean in some ways. It's a useful filter for me if somebody is critical of this podcast. It's like oh okay, well if we just disagree on like what's valuable and what's important and so.
[20:57] Mike: Less shame? Yes, exactly So I can see that. Ah.
[21:12] Mike: Who.
[21:15] Keith: If someone is like oh I could never talk about sex in public. Okay well I think you're sort of boring then um and yeah, and especially if they think there's something shameful about it. It's but yeah I mean I don't know what her experience is like maybe she like recently.
[21:22] Mike: Right.
[21:35] Keith: Met a boy that she liked and then he was like oh I want you to not be on only fans and that hurt her feelings or whatever like you know, maybe there's some proximate cause for this for this complaint I don't think she can.
[21:39] Mike: Right.
[21:49] Keith: I mean in many ways the horses have left the barn right? She's already famous. There's going to be content online forever. So like even if she stopped now like that she posted another video 3 hours later of her wiggling her chest around doesn't isn't necessarily incongruent with her being upset about the position. She's in.
[22:05] Mike: Oh no I agree with that I agree with that I mean she's got to look the the show must go on and and frankly at this point right? She might as well keep it making the money because yeah, nobody's going to delete it. Yeah not doing it for three months I mean I'm not sure how much time she has that she can make this kind of money.
[22:09] Keith: Right? Yeah, she's already suffered most like 90% of the downside risk has already been realized.
[22:23] Keith: Um, yeah, yeah.
[22:25] Mike: But it's certainly less than 10 years and so she should she should continue to do that. Ah I think I I will say that I think that um like your willingness to your the way you think about this is extremely unusual I think most people would not see it that way. Yeah.
[22:35] Keith: I Know I know I agree it is I think most people have more conservative thoughts around sex and sharing their sex lives and talking about it out loud I think just reflexively.
[22:49] Mike: Um, and also they want they don't want they. It's something like they don't want to be constrained from possible future behavior like like this woman who's running for. Ah, Virginia delegate the house of delegates in Virginia they don't want to be have something like that this come back and bite them. Oh I can't be on the the president of the pta for my kid because somebody objects and I live in Oklahoma or whatever like I could see people they think about that and I think you're unusually more willing to take risk to.
[23:12] Keith: Um, yeah.
[23:19] Keith: I've thought about that I I don't understand why when people first of all I'm sure I have said things on this podcast that if sound but sound bitten sound sound bited the right way would.
[23:20] Mike: Ah, get the cash.
[23:34] Keith: Make me come off as a like terrible oaf. Ah I I think generally and the full body of work on this podcast I reveal myself to be fine like certainly no worse. No more misogynist than average. In fact, far less. So and so ah.
[23:44] Mike: Sure.
[23:53] Keith: I've always wondered why when people get called out for um, you know like tweets that they you know tweeted twelve years ago like why don't they just say like look I'm really embarrassed about this but you know when I was that age i. Wasn't as educated as I am now I I still make mistakes and you know I probably will make mistakes going forward but I commit to try to learn from them and like always be listening and try to you know, adjust as as we all learn instead. They're always like. Yeah, their apology doesn't sound like they've actually learned anything from it. They're like oh I'm sorry this got found I'm sorry if people's feelings have been hurt. They don't they don't take the opportunity to say like hey I'm fallible and I'm trying here and if there's something that you guys want me to talk about that I've said I'd be happy to say what my thoughts are now on this and. Let's move forward I don't.
[24:48] Mike: I think it's some combination I mean this make that when this topic always makes me think of Michael Richards in the famous laugh factory incident that people I'm sure know about. Ah yes.
[24:54] Keith: Yeah, yeah, that Michael Richards was Kramer and Seinfeld and what he started shouting the n-word at somebody in the crowd or something.
[25:04] Mike: Right? And I mean like he's known he was known in his standup career I don't think he was thought to be a great standup comic he was he was something he did. He was obviously a great physical comic Nobody nobody doubts that um, but it's something you did and these people you know comp comedians Do it to refine their craft makes sense. But.
[25:15] Keith: Um, yeah.
[25:23] Mike: He Yeah, it makes me think of that because that's there is a playbook that people often follow that I think comes from kind of Pr people damage control and they often don't own what happened in the way you're describing they sort of they they're various strategies people use but essentially they don't they they they. They basically try to get past it as fast as possible and things like that and I think that that it's it's confusing to me. Why people don't just say look like you know, just yeah, just sort of own it and be like yeah this is the thing that happened. Okay, you know.
[25:52] Keith: Yeah I don't it seems like apologizing is not a very well-known art. And yeah I don't understand why so many people are are awful at it. Can we talk briefly about this politician that was camming.
[26:10] Mike: Sure.
[26:11] Keith: This would be politician. Ok so her situation's a little bit differently different. She's not making a million dollars from this. She's ah yeah, like you said she's running for the state congress in what do they call it the house of delegates in Virginia.
[26:25] Mike: Right? Virginia that's right.
[26:31] Keith: And ah yeah I just saw 2 videos that have been released presumably. There's more presumably. They camed a number of times. So it's.
[26:39] Mike: There are yeah there are sites that that record basically everything that happens on chatterbait I mean people thinking of caming should know this? Yes, my emperor. Oh that's a good question I don't know if it's the top 100 but generally my impression is that there are sites that have.
[26:44] Keith: Do they do do you know that they record basically everything or is it just that like top 100 or what is it.
[26:59] Mike: Of the ones that get a reasonable number of viewers. They have everything and yeah, they monetize it right? They're probably hosted not in the United States and they'll show you the first couple videos and then like you have to give them money to get the rest and I'm sure there are people that do it because it's cheaper than paying the only fans or whatever.
[27:03] Keith: Right? right? right now.
[27:16] Keith: Yeah I had to fight through a number of ads and clickbaity things to to see the video. Ah yeah with her. Yeah, so the question you have to ask her yourself is that a.
[27:21] Mike: All right.
[27:32] Keith: Person running for office did this kind of camming in the past actually looks like it was fairly recent past ah is that exclusionary does that exclude them or does that affect their candidacy and I think.
[27:39] Mike: Yes.
[27:50] Keith: Might for me just because well let me think okay I don't think it should affect her candidacy like what she wants to do and the you know quote unquote privacy of her own home is her own business. But.
[27:55] Mike: Um I think I know what you're going to say.
[28:08] Keith: She can't she should know that doing this is would would have like a downstream impact later down the line and she clearly didn't consider that right? So it's revealing of some stupidity or naivety on her part and that stupidity and naivety is what concerns me about her. Not that she has kind of weird boring Kinky's like not that kinky sex with her husband.
[28:36] Mike: Yeah, the I mean the um I guess you would you would feel differently about it if she'd made more money maybe doing it because then she would have sort of a life changing outcome she she constrained her life without much benefit without much upside. Essentially yeah.
[28:50] Keith: That's that's the problem. Yeah.
[28:54] Mike: I mean I think that's that's like that's ah, a reasonable take and and also I I think you're going to say that it's sort of a sign of not being the sharpest bulb that she didn't consider that with this potential career.
[29:02] Keith: That's that's my concern. It's it I don't care that she was naked on camera. Ah what bothers me is that she should have known that that would have some sort of downstream impact and now she's you know.
[29:19] Keith: Yeah, now that she's facing that she's acting outraged that it's having this impact.
[29:25] Mike: Um, I mean yeah, it's not a great way to do it. But it is true that this is a way she's now much better known than she would have been otherwise I doubt that was a strategy.
[29:32] Keith: Yeah, this might end up really helping her I'm not sure apparently it was a close race so it'll be really interesting to see what happens here but you can imagine this galvanizing ah for them like what were the wasn't there um a couple black congressmen and like Alabama or something. And they got evicted from the house because I don't there were they were kicked out for some reason. Ah, anyway became like this national news story and then they raised like.
[29:54] Mike: Oh not evicted, but but they were removed they were um, yeah yeah I mean things like that can I don't remember that house on that sure. Yes.
[30:07] Keith: Millions of dollars in races where like $10000 put you over the edge and.
[30:08] Mike: There was there was a congress woman maybe from Southern California in the last five years who it was revealed was in some sort of complex sexual relationship and that did not help her she lost reelection. So I yeah I mean I think it's a tenuist. Yeah.
[30:14] Keith: Are.
[30:21] Keith: Um, yeah, yeah, there's probably some randomness here. But yeah, you.
[30:27] Mike: Um, but if your goal is I mean the goal in I mean a lot of times I don't think this is her goal. But if your goal was just to basically get known. So then you could somehow make money off of some level of celebrity. It could be a clever clever play right? You go on Chatterbait and then you run for an office and get caught.
[30:40] Keith: Maybe this is all. Right? Maybe she never wanted to be a congresswoman. She just wanted to get more traffic to her chatter bait page. It's 40 chess here. Mike.
[30:46] Mike: And say oh no, you revealed my secret plan.
[30:55] Mike: That's that's that's not likely. That's not likely right? She she gets like a couple extra ah tokens.
[31:02] Keith: Yeah, but yeah, again, like I don't care that she did this I care that she didn't know that other people would care is that how.
[31:12] Mike: Yeah, and you you and you recognize the vast majority of people I think it's fair to say vast majority of people do care about this ah and would treat these people differently having done this and are very concerned for example about what that means I mean. Okay, if you had a kid.
[31:16] Keith: Yes, for sure I yeah.
[31:29] Mike: Let's see and you found out this person was their boy scout or girl scout den leader or something like that would that bother you I mean this is the thing right? It's like it comes down to this. It comes down to school and kids and and it's not fair and it's probably not even reasonable or right and a lot I think this come a lot of the I mean there's.
[31:30] Keith: Ah.
[31:41] Keith: Yeah.
[31:49] Mike: People who as I do follow the much maligned libs of tiktok Twitter account will know that there have been repeated incidents or situations involving principals teachers and so forth at schools who turn out to be drag queens and so on and so forth and it's. I'm not sure people being rational to have a problem with it. But I'm also not surprised. They have a problem with it because they're just hyper concerned about their kids.
[32:13] Keith: Yeah I mean. Ah, yeah I know someone who thinks that men basically shouldn't be allowed to coach ah women's sports teams. And this person actually goes so far as to say that maybe men shouldn't be allowed to be high school teachers and I think they're probably wrong in that. But yeah, he would say like look like 99% of you know, sexual violations are committed by men and so yes, there's some downside of not exposing. Children to men but the upside of making sure that basically all instances of sexual violations goes away is considerable and so it is with stuff like this like ah it.
[32:57] Mike: But I mean would this friend of yours support differential police treatment of people based on their ethnicity because there's similar data with ethnicity and violence I mean like where do you stop? like sure. There's data supporting hey this group of people does this more than that group of people. But I mean you're going to wind up in a pretty.
[33:07] Keith: Ah.
[33:15] Keith: Yeah I don't think like yeah I know that I mean we're really waiting into it here I think the numbers suggest that ah black people commit more crime or get convicted of more crime. Let's say.
[33:15] Mike: Not colorblind situation then.
[33:33] Keith: And but I think even in that case I think it's like it's twice as much or 3 times as much and it depends on the crime and if you adjust for various factors. It drops a bit but generally let's just say for the sake of argument they commit more crime but it's not like it is with like sexual assault where it's like 99 point whatever percent men and so.
[33:42] Mike: Sure sure.
[33:52] Keith: I Think that person might argue right? right? So you yeah I mean you just basically have to weigh the downside of not allowing men like yeah like not exposing children to men basically at all except for maybe their fathers and.
[33:54] Mike: That's true if you if you were to murder all men. You would get rid of all sexual assault all essay as they call it. So it's yeah, that's true.
[34:12] Keith: You know is that worth the upside of getting rid of a bunch of sexual assault but I don't think so but I I I understand at least the spirit of the argument.
[34:20] Mike: Sure I mean that's look the frustrating situation that I find myself in almost daily of not being able to go in the women's locker room is a consequence of these men if that if these men didn't exist. Maybe I would be able to go in there and frolic.
[34:33] Keith: I think there are a number of places in California now that just have 1 bathroom.
[34:39] Mike: No locker room not bathrooms, not inch I don't want to watch them poop I Want to watch them do other stuff. Yeah.
[34:45] Keith: Want to watch them Frolic I think that women's locker rooms have a lot more towel wearing than men's locker rooms. Do I think men men like imposing their their penises even on other men even if they're straight they they just like having them dangle. Although.
[34:53] Mike: Um, that should be against the rules.
[35:00] Mike: It's true.
[35:02] Keith: Have you noticed there is a certain type of man who's also like always wearing a towel in locker rooms like like they have some sort of shame. Yeah.
[35:07] Mike: Sure and you you are or yeah or the guy who doesn't take off his swims so you after swimming. Ah the thing the thing you do 100% notice is that any maybe women listening the woman who listens to this will not know this but any guy under stage 15
[35:22] Keith: Um, yeah, yeah, there are I think I was more modest when I was younger. But at some point I just stopped caring and I think.
[35:24] Mike: In the locker room will not take a swimsuit off while showering but there are some men that do that too and then you have to wonder like does he have a small penis. Yeah, you realize you're about the same as the other guys it doesn't matter.
[35:38] Keith: It's just a sign of adulthood I had a friend in college and and after college too actually who had like really skinny legs and he like had basically never worn shorts in his life. He was so embarrassed by them. He was like crippled by anxiety about it that seems like a horrible way to live. Thank you right.
[35:48] Mike: 2 well, and also when you realize that no one cares, he's he's afraid of something that's not there. Yeah, he probably does now.
[35:58] Keith: Well, he doesn't realize that right right? I don't know I haven't spoken to him in a number of years but I mean he was well into his thirty s and he was still very anti shorts. Um, ok, let's get into some of our. Ah.
[36:12] Mike: That's really weird.
[36:18] Keith: Ah, promised topics here. So do you know what? Somnophilia is.
[36:22] Mike: I I mean given your teasing of the topic at the beginning I now know? yes.
[36:28] Keith: Yeah, it's like ah find what it is exactly Yeah, that's right, it's It's a sexual interest in engaging in sexual activity with a sleeping person. So.
[36:32] Mike: Um, it's sort of a it's sort of ah a light version of Necrophilia Probably it's Necrophilia light.
[36:43] Mike: Right.
[36:45] Keith: Here's what here's what this lady says I think I found a new Fetish. So the other week I came home from work sick I passed out on my boyfriend on the so on the sofa wearing just a tank top and panties. It sounds nice I woke up from my nap because he was jerking off while fondling me when I was passed out and I woke up just as he was about to come and he came all over me. Is it weird that it was actually really turned on by this and thought it was super hot like I kind of wish he had tried to put it in or wasn't so close and could have fucked me but I feel like such a freak for getting turned on by this and don't even know how to address it. Um, first of all.
[37:23] Keith: Yeah I mean this is a little tricky. You definitely don't want young men reading that there's a woman that thinks this is super hot because that might nudge them toward like this person clearly didn't ask for consent before he did this? No she said she was sick. So that's why she.
[37:36] Mike: Is what did she say they'd been drinking I Just don't remember Okay, she was sick I mean he might have thought she was awake that would be like a kind interpretation of this. Um.
[37:42] Keith: Was asleep. Yeah. That is a kind interpretation. She wasn't and and she doesn't mind that she thinks she doesn't mention that he thought she was awake that she thought he was awake.
[37:52] Mike: I don't.
[37:57] Mike: I Think that in general a person who's awake is more attractive than a person who's asleep due to like a whole bunch of factors like the way their body's position the way like what's going on with their mouth knows.
[38:13] Keith: Um, well the reciprocal attraction to you is also there in a way that it can't be when somebody's sleeping.
[38:15] Mike: And so forth like so.
[38:21] Mike: That's a that's a good point as well. Now if let's see I mean I would I sort of think that the most compelling thing about a sleeping person is oh well if you don't know them So in other words, it's a novel person. So so if I saw a video of a sleeping naked woman. Okay, well.
[38:38] Keith: Right? right.
[38:38] Mike: But it's mostly because she's novel that makes it compelling. But if it's someone you know I think that them being asleep decreases their attractiveness by some amount. Um, but I mean I know from the various stories we've seen on the podcast that not all men agree with that or they.
[38:44] Keith: I Feel the same.
[38:53] Keith: Well one of the things I wrote down in my notes here is okay, what do you think the next wrong on this latter is.
[38:55] Mike: Find something compelling about it.
[39:04] Mike: Um, not it's not Necrophilia um next wrong I I don't I don't think it actually is I Hope it isn't.
[39:06] Keith: No, but that's that's on the same ladder I Bet. Ok, well,, there's a few forks in the latter but it I think it starts with something like this. It's like some sort of imagined nonconsent like being able to have your way with something that can't consent or resist like I think yeah yeah.
[39:26] Mike: You're talking about the guy not not the woman because here this question was the woman but okay like.
[39:30] Keith: Look I look I know why she liked it. She liked it because she's like obsessed with this man and like just him using her for pleasure. It turns her on so like it. It doesn't matter what he did like she just yeah, she really likes this guy.
[39:37] Mike: Right? She likes being vulnerable to him maximally right? So that makes sense. Okay, but for the guy, what's the next step. So you think you think that that it this is a nonconsent interest. Not.
[39:51] Keith: Well I don't know it's certainly adjacent.
[39:55] Mike: I Mean the next step could just be something like free use right? He's He's excited by full access at all times to her body. Um, so yeah I mean I could fork it could it could fork I I don't think it has to be him being finding a compelling that she has lack of consent. Yeah, his his.
[40:11] Keith: Um, yeah.
[40:14] Mike: I Think it's if I had to guess I would say I think it's more likely that it's just that he's turned on by the implied consent that he has from her right? So it's more for use. Um, non-conscent I think is more likely to be I think a person who's into non-consent is more likely to find.
[40:26] Keith: Um, yeah.
[40:33] Mike: Interested in her reactions when he violates her right? So having her be asleep actually maybe takes that away a little bit now of course yeah I mean like I'm well aware that there are stories of guys like finding girls sleeping in the library and beating off on them and stuff like that. So there's another.
[40:36] Keith: Does something that's non consensual. Yeah.
[40:51] Mike: There's another kind of fetishy thing available there I know that.
[40:54] Keith: Yeah, that's more of a noncon consent than lack than lack of consent. Okay, there was a ah there was a free use topic I wanted to get to. So maybe I should do that now are so this person says folks in a free use arrangement. What is your system.
[40:59] Mike: It's the ghost.
[41:03] Mike: Sure.
[41:09] Keith: Quick background My boyfriend and I have high sex drives. We love each other very much and sex is one of our fundamental shared Love languages what this like love Languages talk is so bothersome like oh having physical intimacy is a love language like no shit.
[41:24] Mike: Um, what's you? What do you? What? if what have people said your love languages Keith is it arguing.
[41:27] Keith: Okay, do you know? what? Ah do you? not? yeah maybe you've maybe you're distanced enough from dating that you've been spared. That's okay, there are 5 classic love languages. There's some book that came out. Okay, there's um.
[41:32] Mike: I've been spared this? Yeah oh let's hear it. How do you know this is it because some woman made you listen to or tell you it or or does you read it on Wikipedia or something.
[41:43] Keith: It would be like asking me how do I know about astrology I've heard it so many times now that I've just have it through osmosis.
[41:51] Mike: Um, you you've because because you actually have met have you met an SP you've met a woman who is who believes in astrology. Okay go on.
[42:00] Keith: Yes, its three quarters of all women in the dating bowl frustratingly okay, ah actually I have a story to tell you about that but and have to save it for offline.
[42:05] Mike: Yes.
[42:14] Mike: I've told my kids by the way about your astrology experiences and they're just astonished. They're like they're not. They're not that old but they still I mean they immediately know that and I told you that ah my son had a piano teacher that left teaching piano to become an astrologer. It's like I mean he he.
[42:16] Keith: Yeah, good. Yeah.
[42:25] Keith: I.
[42:31] Mike: Consider this we said hey can't you just keep teaching him and he's like no no, there's so much I'm so busy in the astrology game I don't have I I don't even have a half an hour or an hour a week I'm sorry and he you know it's like really mad really.
[42:43] Keith: I Mean if he was entering it cynically and he was like I found a way to make more cash and it's easier than like teaching piano.
[42:51] Mike: He said that? no he said that he said that it was a bunch. He made a lot more money and he and when and and when we sort of verbally rolled our eyes at him. He said um, look it's amounts to like counseling. You know he's like look so.
[43:05] Keith: Yeah, yeah, but.
[43:06] Mike: He I think he does believe in it. But ah, he also is there's a wink and a nod there like it's a little bit like a stage magician.
[43:14] Mike: So okay, okay I know my know. Okay, the Love languages.
[43:15] Keith: Ok I don't want to do astrology today I'm I'm I've had a recent wound on this that I don't want to pick at right out all right? So um, ok the love languages. Okay here we go all right? So one is words of affirmation. You know like compliments I suppose.
[43:29] Mike: So this would be like the woman who says she climaxes immediately after being told she's a good girl.
[43:30] Keith: Or. Something like that. Yeah I think Praise Kink is related to liking words of Affirmation. We've got quality time which is I guess spending time together. We well? yeah.
[43:38] Mike: Okay, okay, second 1 no, no, it's quality time. So it's not like just watching Tv next to each other. It must be like is it. Do you think they would consider it quality time if like I'm arguing with them. No, that's probably not so that's that's I'm her haranguing them about.
[43:52] Keith: Interacting.
[43:56] Keith: I think I'm I think a man would but yeah woman right? No, it's like you know, asking them how their day went and letting them talk about some scuttlebutt with their friends or whatever.
[44:02] Mike: Some my latest and rage. Okay.
[44:12] Mike: It's but it's not like honey. Why don't you come watch me play Super Mario Sunshine It's not it. Okay here. What.
[44:15] Keith: No, that is not quality. Time would be for you though. So there's a there's a yes, there's another thing here which is what are you giving Love languages and what are you receiving Love languages So you're receiving might be having them watch you play video games but you're giving.
[44:27] Mike: Wow, then you can have 2 books. Right? So you could have like a book that's colored blue for one and green for the other I can see I can see how this like turns into a lot of money for some author. Okay, what's the third one
[44:34] Keith: Us.
[44:42] Keith: Ah, third one is gifts so gift giving you see this I seeking arrangement a lot. It is really one of the 5 Yeah, and.
[44:46] Mike: That sounds is that real is really gifts Really one of the love languages or is you just I mean isn't that every okay fine.
[44:58] Keith: Ah, yeah, you wonder if like whoever came up with this. It was published in 1992 the five love we love languages how to express heartfelt commitment to your mate you wonder if the author who I will note was a man cynically was like.
[45:08] Mike: L Ron Hubbard certainly
[45:14] Keith: It's it's ah but it's about the same amount of truthiness and and and wellresearched you wonder if he cynically was like oh what can I put in so that women who you know are that this is not a woke term but who are gold diggers will will feel like they can relate to this book. He's like ok let me put in.
[45:32] Mike: Move it.
[45:32] Keith: Let me put in gifts all right? So that's 3 ah 4 is acts of service. Ah so probably? Ah or I think it's you know, saying like oh I'll help you know whatever you can do.
[45:38] Mike: Such as like doing the dishes kind of.
[45:52] Keith: I Don't know breakfast in bed I don't know shit like that. Okay, and then the last one is physical touch which is basically sex but it's going to say hand it's going to say hand to handholding and like neck kisses and stuff as well. But.
[45:53] Mike: Okay.
[46:00] Mike: So all guys risk but all guys receiving Love languages is going to be that it I mean let's be honest, pay it effectively. All I think I know you have safe save vast majority that's fine. So this is really.
[46:11] Keith: Yes, the vast majority has.
[46:20] Mike: Am I getting this wrong to say that this is all need for women really because for men. It's simple.
[46:25] Keith: I Suspect that the ah average purchaser of this book is female. Yes, the the Median purchaser but um, so.
[46:30] Mike: Um, okay, okay, which so when you've had this conversation with women on dates and so forth. What? what love language? Do you evince I Assume you've had it. Been tortured with this before. So What do you?? What do you say? What does she say like what's the how does this work.
[46:52] Keith: I mean I think most people are ah afraid to admit gifts. Um, so like most people don't don't say that and then yeah I mean I think for receiving I'm probably.
[46:55] Mike: Okay, so you say quality time. Maybe.
[47:07] Mike: Your physical touch dude but go on. Yeah.
[47:09] Keith: Probably quality. Yeah physical touch I mean everyone's physical touch. Yeah, setting aside the obvious. Ah yeah I do like quality time but I also like having a lot of a loan time. So there's a little bit of a swinging door there.
[47:20] Mike: Um, right? Okay, okay.
[47:27] Keith: But and then acts of service gift giving is like a hard. No for me I actually hate when people give me gifts. So if it's past.
[47:34] Mike: So if you go to a woman and you say that you're giving Love language is a physical touch that's like repulsive to them right? that you can't say that that's it's an immediate. No, it's just they're like really you like look my.
[47:42] Keith: I Wonder yeah I would probably wouldn't go. Well yeah.
[47:51] Mike: But just the head just the tip of my cock is so giving it I it'll Ill it'll offer physical touch to any woman. It's amazing. So you okay fine I know that I wouldn't fruit.
[48:00] Keith: Ah I just just feel overflowing with with love here. Just just have to have to give it away.
[48:07] Mike: So forgiving if I were dating the thing I would say would have to be quality time I think is the thing I think that's like the key. Yeah, that's the correct answer the other one's gifts is risky ah words of affirmation sounds sort of it's It's not deep enough. It's too too surface level.
[48:14] Keith: That's the correct answer.
[48:25] Keith: Um, I think if you're dating a much.
[48:27] Mike: Acts of so acts of service I think is a woman might feel like she does that as her giving love language. But really, that's just for giving you a blowrop like acts of service is just her side of the physical touch right.
[48:39] Keith: Ah, this is a good critique of this book I'm going to I'm going to add some of this to I quiver and see if I can make a little comedy routine out of it next time it comes up.
[48:46] Mike: It probably won't yeah.
[48:51] Keith: The problem is like when it comes up. It's it's like when somebody brings up, you know what's your Myers Brigg score what's your Enneagram type like if I don't take it seriously they get upset.
[48:59] Mike: Oh you don't take Myers-briggs. Seriously.
[49:05] Keith: I'm not sure what to say to this I you and I have both been in that same Myers Sprick straighting several times and I know for a fact that ah you you did not take it. Yeah yeah.
[49:12] Mike: I Yes, the only difference you're ah you're extroverted and I'm introverted. No I was I was in one once that wast that you were not in that um their wife they they had a result that I thought was interesting. They were able to line us up on some variable they had.
[49:29] Keith: Um, yeah.
[49:30] Mike: Now I'm not sure I don't think it was from Myers Briggs I think it was just self-reported. It was interesting in that it was yeah I think it wasn't but I think this one wasn't based on test. It was just they asked the question it was. It was how when you have a vacation how much planning do you like to do ahead of time or how much how unplanned do you want it to be.
[49:32] Keith: Well then there are there are other enneagram tests that aren't Myers Briggs
[49:46] Keith: Um, yeah.
[49:47] Mike: And that was actually very interesting in that the people on one end clustered about it. Did I think it did reveal that question which actually had nothing to do with Myyersberg I think did reveal something about people's planning versus not not planning personality types and would tell you something like you're like oh now I get why if you're in a meeting with these four people. It goes this way. It's because you guys are all like.
[49:51] Keith: Ha.
[49:58] Keith: Um, yeah, yeah.
[50:05] Keith: Right? right? right? right? Yeah, now that's interesting. Yeah, right.
[50:07] Mike: Obsessive planners and this dude like just jumps in his van and drives away and it's like oh that's why in the meeting. He's tapping his foot and he's bored and anyway okay, but yes, generally I agree with you that Myers-briggs is not science. It's not scientific. Myers and briggs were ah actually art majors now I made that up but it that the truthiness of what I said was around the same truthiness as myyers briggs. So if you believed that then yeah.
[50:26] Keith: Is that true. Do you know that.
[50:33] Keith: Fair enough right? All right? All right back to these free use people. Okay so they're 26 and 24 they have high sex drives and sex is one of their shared loves languages. We came up with a system that I later learnedred was called free use in porn terms. However, in our case, we simply set ground roles as we can both assume consent whenever we feel the need.
[50:45] Mike: Um.
[50:53] Keith: Either of us aren't up for it. We can simply say no at that point and the other will understand and keep it in their pants for the time being. Okay, she's misunderstanding what for use is but yeah, exactly naturally it also comes with using good judgment. Don't come and poll at me while I'm attending a Zoom meeting or not to touch him when he's using power tools. Okay.
[51:00] Mike: That's not really free use I mean yeah.
[51:11] Mike: Hearts. Okay, don't don't ask for a blumpkin etc. Yeah.
[51:11] Keith: It's good system for us. How do you get your free use privileges revoked. Ah, we eventually started to make up little shortcuts to make life easier for us such as a stash of towels some condoms and a squirt bottle of lube. And random crevices around the house. What how big is their house checkins with 1 another before one of us has to leave somewhere so the other is it left waiting to name a few would be kind of nice like every time your wife left she comes and says like hey do you need a blowjob real quick. Um.
[51:35] Mike: The fuck These people need a hobby.
[51:44] Keith: Like to be proactive about these things so it just got me wondering do any of you guys in a similar arrangement with their partner have any tips or tricks to make this life easier. So the entire reason I read this was I wanted to read the first comment because I find this ah almost unbelievable. This person says I am 100% free use for my partner for us.
[51:55] Mike: Now.
[52:04] Keith: Means that I have consented to be used by him in any way he wants me at any time we are also Kinky So This free use includes any kink activity he desires I Fucking Love it so much I Love being his I Love our sex life I Love being used. Love when he gives me that look or uses that voice or touches me in just the way that I know we are game on and he's going to take me for a ride. It's red. Okay here we go. We are both 50 both high libido engage in sexual acts about 4 times a day sometimes for extended periods of time in parentheses.
[52:35] Mike: This is that virgin this is actually that Virginia house of delegates candidate right here but go on. Yeah.
[52:35] Keith: Over an hour.
[52:39] Keith: How I mean this is a life that just I mean are they retired like how do they even function in a normal society.
[52:48] Mike: Oh you're wondering. Yeah, you're wondering I like but who go who does the shopping. They obviously don't have kids etc. Yeah I got it. Yeah, that's problematic.
[52:55] Keith: Right? 4 times a day for over an hour and they're in their 50 s.
[53:04] Mike: Um, that sounds really boring that sounds really boring like ah I okay when I was in college. Ah I I I remember being in college at that age like 19 and.
[53:16] Keith: Yes, yeah.
[53:21] Mike: Having sex for like a period of time like maybe an hour and being like I got to do something else with my life and like getting up and leaving even at that age. So at 50 I mean you think come on. Don't I mean you you just have nothing better to do I mean it's ah.
[53:36] Keith: I Don't it. It just seems this whole thing seems preposterous like we've we've joked about for use in the past but like obviously there have to be boundaries but you can't yeah it's just like where that boundary is ah and.
[53:49] Mike: Oh well I mean the other yeah the other thing when you were reading it before you got to the age part I was thinking to myself this this this relies on the guy being it relies on a really really strongly matched libido or something because I think.
[54:03] Keith: Um, yeah.
[54:07] Mike: I think in most cases, the guy will come up with something that the woman it could go the other way too. But in most cases I think the guy will come up with something the woman doesn't want to do maybe at age 50 that wouldn't happen but sufficiently young the the guy is going to see something in porn and be like oh let's do this and she's going to be like I don't want to do that I'm not sure exactly what it would be.
[54:20] Keith: Sure right? Yeah I mean this person goes out of her way to say includes any kink activity he desires. But yes, again, presumably There's some edges there.
[54:27] Mike: Hands on the couple.
[54:37] Mike: Right? Well I mean since I assume they're long-term couples so he wouldn't want to do something like branding her on the butt or you know giving her ah 1 of those like tattoo like tattooing the whites of her eyeballs these are things I would consider doing but.
[54:49] Keith: Um.
[54:51] Mike: Ah, tattooing the whites of the eyeballs a thing people in prison do sometimes ah well in prison. Ah you get the ink from like a ballpoint pen and you just sort of dribble it you dribble it through like a incision that's made with a razor blade. Yeah.
[54:54] Keith: Um, how do you do that.
[55:02] Keith: Ah, okay, all right I'm sorry asked. Okay, all right I'm sorry asked my but that's that's on me my bad.
[55:10] Mike: Know Yeah I mean yeah, it's she'd be like man free use was really great until he gave me the swastika tattoo on my forehead and then it then my life went downhill. She's like the the cam girl but worse. Yeah.
[55:21] Keith: Right? right? Yeah, like you can feel this person has often been asked the question like well of course there's some boundary. But yeah, she goes out of her way to say like 3 different ways. There are no boundaries all right, let's move on I want to get to this last topic and we're running out of time here all right? This is about a penis extender.
[55:34] Mike: Yeah, okay, um.
[55:39] Keith: Ah, my girlfriend mentioned she would try penis extender with me now I can't help but feel insecure. So she's 22 he's 21 ah we were out of town. We went to a sex shop. Um, we browse through the aisles spelled I s l e s.
[55:44] Mike: Yes.
[55:55] Mike: Who.
[55:57] Keith: Ah, we come across this big selection of penis extenders. Ah I told her it's the 1 thing I wouldn't try and asked her what she thought about them. She kind of just shrugged off the question at first which I thought was kind of strange. So I asked her again and she said she would try it with me I know probably she did mean. To make a dig at me but I couldn't stop thinking about it I'll be honest I do have insecurities I've never mentioned this to her but I guess watching porn since a young age you know I've seen a lot of big cocks but blah blah have ever I have an average penis. Heck, it's even a tiny bit above and then he says 5.5 to six inches with 4.5 to five Inch girth now that's quite a big range. Yeah yeah, all right? She assures me all the time she loves the sex and is satisfied but I see she enjoys the sex way more in the positions I can get very deep like legs up missionary.
[56:36] Mike: That's not above. It's also not above I mean it's it's it's a round average. It's fine.
[56:51] Keith: There's time. She's told me deeper even though giving her everything I have I mentioned the penis extended to her later that day I know I shouldn't have but she could tell something was up and she again assured me everything was fine but also mentioned that every girl fantasizes about trying to take a big penis right? Okay, this is now I remember why I wanted to bring this up right.
[56:54] Mike: Um, move.
[57:06] Mike: Um, that's not true. Yeah.
[57:10] Keith: Hold on. So that's what I want to interrogate you about but let me finish I guess that didn't help but oh well she hasn't had many partners before only 2 drunken one night stands so I guess she hasn't experienced that I can't help to feel insecure with my size but to feel I also think of. What ifs which I know is fucking with me. Any advice is welcome. Thanks okay, this is what I wanted to ask you could there be yeah, like maybe you want a partner that has had sex with a man with a big cock so that they know it's not you know, but materially better.
[57:44] Mike: You mean a partner with a big cock other other than me.
[57:48] Keith: Right? That sorry I should have clariyed that this is this is for a person with a hypothetically modestly sized penis who's you in Essence sense. This is the hypothet. They the hypothetical person. Yes.
[57:56] Mike: Right? So you want them to have had to experience that so that what one wants them. 1 wants them to have experienced that look. There's some what? what's so funny.
[58:16] Mike: Ah, there's some set of women I don't think it's a very large set that get a lot more out of a much larger penis I Believe that's true. Um, yeah, so that's that's that's a case and if you have a small or modest penis or even a above average penis like.
[58:18] Keith: Yeah.
[58:24] Keith: Um, yeah, they they're called size queens.
[58:33] Mike: That might actually be I mean her love language isn't one of these 5 but it's it's her love language is it's like a picture of a fist. It's ah it's a fist a rubber from her rubber fist but the ah ah I um what? what is your point about having oh oh oh right so your point would be.
[58:36] Keith: Physical deep touch.
[58:52] Mike: She should have tried that to know whether that's her love language.
[58:53] Keith: Yeah I could imagine when inexperienced women definitely wondering what if like if they've never had the experience of a cock that's too big.
[59:02] Mike: Um, now I mean maybe the reason I don't ah could you imagine it? Yes I'm sure that happens but the typical woman I don't think so and my my evidence is that there's this really significant percentage of women who haven't even had an orgasm and that like why don't they all wonder what if and with a vibrator most of them would.
[59:14] Keith: Yeah I tried to do it. Yeah I yeah I I tried to do a thought experiment on this which is yeah if I had only had sex with 1 vagina what I like fantasize about a tighter one and I don't think I you think you would.
[59:20] Mike: Go ahead.
[59:28] Mike: Oh yeah I would well only because men are programmed to want diversity of partners. So show a fantasize I mean that's strong but I'd be curious and like I would I would be interested.
[59:37] Keith: Well I would definitely fantasize about a different vagina I'm not sure I would fantasize about a tighter one. Maybe I would I'm not sure I've I've had I've experienced enough vaginas At this point that I know that tightness is not a material.
[59:50] Mike: Um I think it would var a vary the things. Yeah.
[59:56] Mike: Um, sure. But that's that's ah you have visceral knowledge of that fact, what what other attribute about a vagina might you fantasize about besides tightness length or like.
[59:57] Keith: Difference between.
[01:00:01] Keith: Right? But I only have that because I've you know sucked with multiple people. So.
[01:00:12] Keith: Have a topic I've wanted to talk to for a while about about vva color but we'll we'll get to that next week. Maybe um, that's right, Yeah, the avatar people.
[01:00:15] Mike: Top. Okay I've never fucked a blue vagina or something like top to bottom length like anus to clit distance I could see fantasizing about that. Um I've never had a woman with a twelve inch anus to clit.
[01:00:30] Keith: I Don't think that exists I think it varies between like millimeters and like a couple centimeters or something.
[01:00:35] Mike: You have no idea Keith if a woman had a millimeter between her anus and her clit that'd be brought very no no no I was talking by clit because I'm talking about like the the full length of the.
[01:00:42] Keith: Oh not her clit sorry I'm at the bottom of her vaginal cavity. Yeah, okay, got it I got it? yeah.
[01:00:53] Mike: Operative operative surface here. It could. It's probably not. It's probably on the order of six inches typically or something maybe a little longer. Um, you've never considered having one of these extenders I um i.
[01:01:09] Keith: I have it but I've never had it requested either like if if a person I was seeing requested I use a penis extender I think I would probably just break up with them like I don't think my ego could handle it I think so.
[01:01:10] Mike: Yeah, it's usually a mistake for a guy to do it.
[01:01:22] Mike: Um, really your ego couldn't I think your your first reaction would be to get upset. My first reaction would be that it's hilarious I think I would I would dev I would be like all right.
[01:01:31] Keith: I think my first reaction would actually be better than my after thinking about it reaction like my first reaction would be like okay maybe and then but then my my longer reaction to be like oh I may never be able to satisfy this person and I would and that would in ed in my brain.
[01:01:37] Mike: What.
[01:01:44] Mike: Wait wait. But if given the choice given the choice I'll say what I would do given the choice. Let's say there was a woman and she expressed a strong preference for this I would rather okay, let's assume that I was going to break up with her I'm like okay this is going to work because there's something deficient about me.
[01:02:01] Keith: Um, yeah, oh yeah I think so too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[01:02:04] Mike: I would still rather get the size extender and see what happens to her just just okay so you would do you would you would do it see the effect on her but you aren't and the reason I brought that up is you're not worried for your ego that you would see something something would happen in that room that you could never unsee.
[01:02:18] Keith: No no I know that there are people with you know, enormous cocks and so and I'm not yes no I think I already know that that exists I don't think.
[01:02:23] Mike: And that there are women who get tremendous pleasure from it so that wouldn't bother you see seeing seeing okay and you in since you were planning to. But if if it was a woman you were not planning to break up with it would bother you.
[01:02:37] Keith: And well and in this content in this context, they've already asked for an extender. So like I bought you like most of the recognition that I'm deficient in some ways already occurred before actually viscerally experiencing it.
[01:02:49] Mike: Um I have to say like I kind of I don't think I would necessarily break up with the person I think I think I probably wouldn't and I kind of like the idea that there's this thing that basically I can choose whether to give her that extra pleasure. So I can like I can withhold the extender like look stop being such a bitch.
[01:03:04] Keith: Um, isn't it wouldn't it be something like always having to wear a condom like doesn't the extender lower sensitivity in some way I'd say.
[01:03:07] Mike: Not giving you the extender. No I wouldn't no because of course but I would I wouldn't use it most of the time I'd be like look you know, Occasionally, that's our love Language is not the penis extender honey. It's that's that's that's for special occasions right? My love language is.
[01:03:21] Keith: Ah, it's the not using the peters Extender is my love language right? right.
[01:03:26] Mike: Is ah is preventing you from from getting that height of pleasure I don't know though and I know the fear guys would have in seriousness the fear would be if it's that much better. She's just going to find I mean it's not hard for a woman to find other men to have sex with her. So yeah.
[01:03:39] Keith: Right? right? All right? That'll do it for this episode of your mileage may vary. Thanks for listening. Ah, we pay $10 for any feedback received you can send us feedback at ymmvpod at Gmail.com and put your venmo or cash app or whatever in there. You can also ask us questions there if you are interested in our expertise. Um, if you'd like us to keep your question private that is to say not to use it on the show just say so in the email and we will honor that thanks again for listening and we look forward to catching you next week on your mileage may vary.

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Episode 135: Regretful Camgirls And Politicians, Somnophilia, Extenders, Too Much Free Use?

Episode Transcript