Your Mileage May Vary: Cis-Orgasms, Failure To Launch Orally, Feeling Her Climax, Campground Sex Noises

Episode Transcript

Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.

[00:00] Keith: Hello and welcome to your mileage may vary. We talk about sex and relationships with frankness that is mostly in good faith but often controversial I've collated another spectacular list of salacious topics to cover today including men who claim they don't clump come from blowjobs camping sex etiquette. Whether men can feel when a woman is coming and more I'm Keith my co-host is Mike hi Mike and today against her better judgment. We have returning champion Allie on the show. Welcome back Allie so I thought of you.
[00:23] Mike: Hello keith.
[00:30] Ally: Hello.
[00:37] Keith: At the end of our last episode and then you texted in response which I was pleased by because I speculated that you might not want to talk about the topic that I brought up. Ah, basically we were We were talking about ah the experience.
[00:39] Ally: So.
[00:56] Keith: That I think women may have as they age through their mid 20 s into their mid 40 s whereby their perceived attractiveness physical attractiveness to others. Ah. Clients is that a controversial thing to say.
[01:15] Ally: No, that's definitely true.
[01:18] Keith: Ok I mean it's obviously true. But I think a lot of people would contest.
[01:18] Mike: Yes, It's True. Yes. I Think that the counter would be something like there although before the show we were just having a discussion that suggests maybe this isn't the case but the counter would be something that there could be other attributes that improve other attributes that are less valued by the.
[01:45] Keith: Like dishwashing ability.
[01:45] Mike: Superficial man like.
[01:47] Ally: Um, yeah I mean.
[01:48] Mike: Yeah, that's right? Keith ah style fashion sense.
[01:51] Keith: Just just kidding just kidding.
[01:53] Ally: Yeah I think my my take from that was a you should ask someone who is or was a 10 because for me starting from you know, middling attractive and then like slowly losing attractiveness. That's never been something that I've really banked on or used. And the same way. Um, and it doesn't seem to be affecting my life and in that way. Also I'm also in an industry where if you are very attractive that can count against you where people will take you less Seriously, you'll get fewer opportunities people think that you're less serious.
[02:27] Keith: Um I don't I don't think that's true like.
[02:32] Mike: I do.
[02:34] Ally: I've had people tell me that they discounted me for roles because I looked too young which I think is a kind of coded wave saying that.
[02:42] Keith: But after you talk for like 30 seconds doesn't that fade like I'm I'm sure like when I see a beautiful woman I probably ah prejudge her intelligence a little bit lower than an average looking woman but it. I think that judgment is almost immediately. Ah like I think might I think I changed my prior on that almost immediately after they say something now. Usually it's confirmed but um, not always.
[03:09] Mike: What kind of thing would they say that confirms it. Keith.
[03:10] Ally: Um, yeah.
[03:14] Ally: So it it could be intelligence. It also could be you know some men wouldn't want to I guess have a really attractive woman on their team either because they're concerned for the perception or concerned about their own relationship or they feel it would be distracting.
[03:30] Keith: Right? Like Mike Pence
[03:32] Ally: I Think yeah I think there are middle aged guys like that who are a little bit insecure and who've been married for a really long time and don't want the perception that they're hiring this person or you know adding this person to their team for the wrong reasons.
[03:47] Keith: I Feel like.
[03:49] Ally: Which again is not really something that would happen to me but is something where I feel like not being that person has helped no I'm saying like the I'm I'm not attractive enough that people would worry about that.
[03:54] Keith: Okay, let's say you were.
[03:56] Mike: Um, you just said it did happen to you.
[04:07] Mike: Okay, so when you were 20 on a scale of 1 to 10 how attractive were you.
[04:09] Ally: As much.
[04:14] Ally: I like 7 I mean everybody set up and you see those videos and like 5 or 6 like I think you know it's like a linear.
[04:19] Mike: That's not bad 7 and and now what do you think you are so so okay so you're viewing your viewing.
[04:28] Keith: I Feel like there's steps. But yeah.
[04:31] Ally: And.
[04:32] Mike: You're viewing ah 9 or 10 as when you when you say super attractive. You're talking 9 or 10 I see.
[04:36] Ally: Yeah, and I've I've never been there and I don't feel like there's anything I could do with you know, clothing or makeup or something to get there. It's not.
[04:44] Keith: Well I mean would you suggest that you know prime Gislle if she's walking into a board meeting where yeah with an ugly mask or like do her makeup in a way that that minus choose her.
[04:54] Ally: Um, Prime is ah um.
[05:01] Ally: No I think she you know if if she's interviewing for a position as a physicist or something I think she's going to get taken less seriously and I think there's nothing she can do about that.
[05:10] Keith: Well, but couldn't she change if she's taken less seriously because of the way she looks she could change her look so that they're less gillli.
[05:21] Ally: It's like the I mean it's the body type Also though I think.
[05:24] Keith: Yeah, that's true. She did have a good body. Ah maybe she could wear a hoodie or offensive I don't know I Just yeah I think I mean I do think that um men generally.
[05:30] Ally: Like yes, maybe.
[05:42] Keith: Judge women is dumber and I think that's probably accentuated if they are more attractive but I think that the various benefits of pretty privilege generally. Ah yeah I bet in almost every case it exceeds the the minuses of it and.
[05:58] Ally: Oh yeah, I'm sure the benefits are great. Yeah I guess I'm thinking the converse of your position that women are going to find this decline to drastically limit the sex. They're able to get is presupposing.
[06:01] Keith: To the extent that to the extent that they're.
[06:15] Ally: That everyone who any type of woman wants to have sex with is first and foremost judging on what they look like and I'm saying someone who's willing to have sex with someone who's a 6 is not doing that.
[06:23] Keith: Okay, okay, okay, let's say let's say you were a 7 and when you were but when you when you were a 7 Ah, did you find that like men who might be considered say 5 s.
[06:24] Mike: Well, she was.
[06:32] Ally: Um, to be um.
[06:41] Keith: Treated you differently than men who might be considered say Nines like were you able to to perceive that or do you remember I mean it's It's very subjective.
[06:50] Ally: Treated me differently like if I were flirting with them were just in general. Um.
[06:53] Keith: I Guess both.
[07:00] Ally: No I don't I don't think there really would have been a difference.
[07:04] Keith: Ok, and you think that someone who was a woman who was a 9 might feel more of a difference.
[07:12] Ally: Um, I think a woman who is a 9 would just get more attention overall from everyone and I'm sure that there are men who are five s who only pay attention to women who are nines and there are men who are nines who only pay attention to women who are nines.
[07:17] Keith: Right? Yeah I definitely.
[07:30] Ally: But like.
[07:32] Mike: Um I sense some pain here is this is this a is this a like is this is this tapping into like the sort of core female desire to want attention I wouldn't have thought about it attention until you mentioned it.
[07:35] Keith: Ah, so.
[07:44] Ally: No like I'm if I'm pausing. It's because I'm trying to remember or like trying to think of an example of a like a man who has a 5 versus you know who I would have known when I was 20 um, no I think like in some ways it would have been. Like if I'm thinking about the the people who I wanted to sleep with back then who wouldn't sleep with me. Do I think they would have slept with me if I were just prettier. But if I were the same like personality and everything like no probably not. Um.
[08:11] Mike: Um, what is that like as a woman having wanting go ahead hang on what what is it like to want to have sex with a guy and he won't have sex with you. What's that What is what is the general experience there I mean this is a thing that men experience pretty frequently.
[08:13] Keith: We disagree I I I bet they would.
[08:27] Keith: Right? constantly.
[08:27] Ally: Yeah, well I think yeah I think you probably experience this Mike because you've said that like while you've been married women have no like you've said well you've been married women have like offered to have sex with you and you've turned them down so like some of the people that I'm talking about are people who were married or who were in serious relationships and didn't want.
[08:29] Mike: Ah.
[08:33] Mike: Okay.
[08:46] Ally: Have sex with me presumably partially for that reason and that's understandable and I don't think that me being prettier would have changed that or they probably wouldn't have been in those marriages like there are pretty people.
[08:59] Mike: Okay, but so that's different from somebody who's just above your pay grade right? That's somebody who's actually unavailable.
[09:09] Ally: Yeah, right? But then there've been married people who would have sex with me So like you can't use it as a total blanket criteria and to direct your attraction. Um, but yeah I yeah I'm trying to think if if I can think of an example of someone.
[09:14] Mike: That makes sense that makes sense.
[09:26] Ally: Who was single and just like too hot to have sex with me right? Yeah I mean I guess like David de coveny or something but like I've never met him so that does right? So maybe he would have yeah.
[09:29] Mike: And you wanted to have sex with him.
[09:35] Keith: Well then he was famously a sex addict so you might have a might have a shot there now.
[09:46] Mike: Okay, so it's not yeah, it's much more. Ah, so yeah, it's much This is much more rare of a phenomenon than it is for men which is not surprising.
[09:53] Ally: I Guess yeah.
[09:54] Keith: The thought phenomenon of somebody not wanting to have sex with you I mean that's the constant male experience like even for Ryan Gosling like it's just constant micro rejections one after another.
[10:01] Mike: Um, that's true. Yeah I think that if ah I think that if men could have the world be the way they want it.
[10:01] Ally: Um.
[10:12] Mike: The world would be sort of it's sort of like ah in that video game second life when they allowed gambling and all of a sudden everything turned into casinos. It would just be a gigantic men would just turn the world into a gigantic bathhouse with with women though.
[10:20] Keith: I Really wonder I Really wonder like it if I had like a holodeck that had machine learning and could tell what I liked and you know slowly adapted itself to be exactly the world that I want a I Just wonder.
[10:21] Ally: And.
[10:37] Keith: If it would just be women throwing themselves at me constantly or like I need some amount of rejection so that the successes feel more triumphant I'm dead. Yeah yeah.
[10:44] Mike: It's probably right? It's probably the latter. Yeah, that's how I know the world is a simulation is because it's It's appears to be set up exactly like that for you some percentage rejection some percentage. Yes.
[10:56] Ally: Right? because Keith also like it would be really ugly women throwing themselves at you too like the whole spectrum of women and you would get fed up with that really quickly. Okay, um.
[11:02] Keith: Well not on my holidaylock though either right amount of whatever I want it.
[11:10] Mike: You probably have it so that the ugly women were just awed by you as you walked by, they wouldn't even try. Yeah, that's right, they they'd applaud as you walked by? yeah.
[11:12] Ally: Assembling.
[11:18] Keith: Which is like stopped out. They get on their knees and pray yeah that would be nice. yeah yeah I could hear like Hush tones admiring me. Um.
[11:22] Ally: Um.
[11:28] Mike: Right.
[11:33] Keith: We want to talk about God Pussy we've had it on our spreadsheet here for a while.
[11:38] Ally: I Don't know what this is so yes I do.
[11:39] Mike: I think Allie might be interested in seeing it. Okay, well I think you should go I don't think I can share my screen but it's a subreddit that you can go to you can just search Google for it. Um god pussy g o d p ss y.
[11:49] Keith: Yeah, it it just reddit.com/our/godpussy all 1 word
[11:56] Mike: You can do that too. Ah I sorted mine based on the ah, the top of all time and no no wait. Let's do top all time. Although the problem is that now that um I girl Emger has eliminated pornographic content.
[12:01] Keith: Okay, yeah, let's do top all time.
[12:01] Ally: Then.
[12:13] Keith: Um, yes.
[12:13] Mike: You run the risk with that stuff of of having the top ones from all time be missing which is frustrating. Um, but the top 1 of all time. This is one people that follow the podcast can check out. Um, actually it's not It's not that easy to see what the premise is I guess you have to. It's a video. To wait till you get a few seconds into it to see the second one at top of all time is just a much more obvious one.
[12:38] Keith: Yeah, let's talk about the second one. The second one is do men who eat pussy for their own pleasure exist.
[12:43] Mike: Yeah Allie do you have this up on your computer.
[12:44] Ally: Me Yeah I mean this is less interesting than I thought I thought this was going to be like people trying to draw what God's pussy would look like if God were a woman but go on this is just regular pussy.
[12:55] Keith: Now that.
[12:57] Mike: That's good. That's good. No no, these aren't.
[12:59] Keith: Okay, so so I think I can describe the the various features of of this god pussy that make it so godly. But I'm curious Allie what you think.
[13:02] Ally: He have no supernatural power. Yeah.
[13:10] Ally: Oh.
[13:17] Keith: Makes this get so many up votes.
[13:18] Ally: I I guess they like the labia both Menorah and majora for Mike's scientific friends are very small and the inner ones are very pink I don't know she's shaved really? well there is.
[13:25] Keith: Um, yeah.
[13:29] Mike: Um, thank you.
[13:34] Keith: yeah yeah yeah I see that yeah it gets into the sunlight there at the end of this is this ah for our listeners. It's about a 2 second gif that keeps repeating. Ah.
[13:36] Ally: Ah, bump at the bottom that I'm not sure what that is what is that.
[13:39] Mike: Um, let me check.
[13:48] Mike: I Don't know that that's a bump don't you think that's just sort of the bottom part of the labia.
[13:54] Keith: It is but I agree with the implication of what Allie said which is if that were a little bit smaller. It would be and incrementally better like I wouldn't wouldn't stop on wouldn't turn this down I'm just acknowledging it. You know it is a.
[13:54] Ally: Oh maybe it looks a little round.
[14:03] Ally: Ah, so yeah, it's just like a yeah I Guess it's like it doesn't open very much. It's like very closed. Ah, it seems like her clit is very small.
[14:07] Mike: I don't think Ali was angry. You guy go on.
[14:12] Keith: Minor, Yeah, it's seems tight.
[14:20] Keith: Or yeah, at least it's not at all swollen in this particular image.
[14:21] Mike: Um, streamlined even.
[14:23] Ally: Um, right? Yeah yeah, she doesn't look wet at all is that part of it I'm I'm basing so seeing 2 so far. Okay.
[14:32] Keith: Ah, yeah, yeah, yes.
[14:35] Mike: I Don't think that's part of it I think it's the ah the smallness. Well one of them is the title is my pussy is wet enough for you to slide right in so presumably.
[14:39] Ally: Well actually no now I'm scrolling down none of them look wet. So maybe that is part of it.
[14:46] Ally: I Don't know these are unreliable narrators. So yeah I would just say these are like small and have very closed labia that are also very small and like they yeah their clits are very small I guess.
[14:50] Keith: How far.
[14:53] Mike: Um.
[15:01] Keith: Um, yeah.
[15:05] Ally: Oh don't know there's one if you scroll down far enough to work Upskirt pussy my boss told me today she follows me on Reddit hard eyes emoji devil emoji hard I so that one is weirder I find that one.
[15:08] Keith: What's the caption. Okay, Wow now. Yeah. Yeah I find that one not as attractive although the panties pulled to to the side and this one is I like that I don't know just feels like.
[15:28] Mike: Why.
[15:35] Keith: I think I've mentioned this before. Yeah it feels like things are in a rush. There's There's like some passion involved.
[15:41] Ally: Um, but her thing that was notably different to me because like the lavi are more wrinkled and ah yeah.
[15:45] Keith: Yeah, they are well and the the shaving job or waxing job that these women are doing is just I mean there's not you can't even see like a single hair pore.
[15:46] Mike: But they're still they're delicate and small alley.
[16:01] Ally: Um, yeah, um.
[16:02] Keith: There's there's like no razor bumps like everything is just pristine.
[16:04] Mike: Ah Allie the sola confirm your thing about wetness the the fourth one from the top I think the person meant to say the best desser is mommy's pussy but they wrote the best desert is mommy's pussy. So I guess that pretty dry there.
[16:11] Ally: Um.
[16:17] Ally: Ah, well there you go? Yeah yeah.
[16:22] Mike: I Think maybe this is referring to shaving now let me look for the ah at the ah description. Okay, this subreddit is dedicated to showcasing gorgeous close up photos of Vaginas of course there? Yeah um, submissions should be of high quality should focus primarily on showing the pussy.
[16:25] Keith: What were those boobs real in that one.
[16:32] Keith: Here.
[16:33] Ally: About.
[16:42] Ally: Um, um, um, yeah, but can you sort by worst I Want to see um you can't sort by worst.
[16:43] Mike: Yeah, so it's not necessarily one. These are the ones that get the most up votes. We're like it between ten and Twenty Thousand up votes. These are are even 30000 these are ah well you can you could do controversial.
[16:55] Keith: I Don't know if you can this guy says let daddy irrigate that desert with his eggplant Emoji water droplets Emoji Water Droplets emoji.
[17:04] Ally: Oh I see Yeah okay, the most controversial.
[17:07] Mike: So um of all time do what most do controversial all time and you'll see one. That's it's titled perfection when you it's it does look like a prolapse situation. You know.
[17:12] Ally: Yeah, what is that that looks like it's coming out of her abdomen. Yeah, and then there's one with a lot of hair below that. So yeah I guess you're right? It is about shaving and then there's some that are but what? so.
[17:30] Keith: Smooth.
[17:31] Ally: It's the one titled happy Thursday like that's too far in what is.
[17:38] Mike: Um Allie this is surprising. You're being kind of cruel to these ah fellow ladies. That's right.
[17:41] Ally: Um, I mean oh yeah, no, that's a photography issue like this is like ah this required a scope of some kind.
[17:41] Keith: Ah, yeah, they were. It's just genetics they were they were born this way Allie it's not their fault.
[17:58] Mike: So is this do you would you ever aspire to have a what what these people call a God Pussy alley.
[18:06] Ally: Um, sure not the controvers. Oh my God The controversial ones are so bad. Sorry I can't like.
[18:11] Keith: There's good news. Ah, there's good news here which is by the time and we've discussed this on the show before but by the time somebody is ah, closely inspecting your vagina you know I don't think anyone has ever.
[18:14] Mike: That's rough.
[18:25] Ally: Um.
[18:29] Keith: Well I'm sure it's happened but generally men aren't going to be like oh your labia are two millimeters longer than I was hoping I'm I'm out.
[18:35] Ally: Oh right? It's not that it's more I would like to have I guess skin that does not react to shaving that would be great.
[18:42] Keith: Um, yeah, me too I only shave so often because if I shave too often I get razor bumps myself and so um.
[18:52] Mike: Um, so you that's the thing you notice the most Allie is the seeming effectiveness of their depolation techniques.
[18:57] Ally: Yeah I mean I've never tried waxing but like yeah I don't I don't think that I could achieve perfect smoothness with any kind of depulatory efforts.
[19:09] Mike: Nice day.
[19:10] Keith: Um, never I think people wax like before they go on like a beach vacation.
[19:14] Ally: I Just shave.
[19:18] Keith: But that a hassle.
[19:19] Mike: It's it is fairly normal for women to have some some ah areas down there that they are ah uncomfortable about or so is this something women talk about with each other like hey my lab are just kind of big.
[19:27] Ally: Saving? Oh no I don't think I've ever.
[19:33] Mike: Even though that is like it's a thing that's very well like for somewhat common for women to have some yet discomfort or discomfort's the wrong word that they sort of they don't feel they don't feel confident lack of confidence about how they're how their labia look and so forth.
[19:49] Ally: Yeah I've never had that conversation with someone else I'm trying to remember women don't really see each other's vaginas either. So I don't feel like I've seen No um.
[19:56] Mike: Um, you don't check them out in the locker room you could or I guess you sort of couldn't because they're typically standing up.
[20:05] Ally: Yeah I mean you could but like it might be sort of obvious I'm also so there's also a God Pussy V Two subreddit is that the same It's kind of the same.
[20:07] Mike: Um, well oh I didn't know about that is it better.
[20:08] Keith: Don't have the angle.
[20:12] Keith: Now What is the difference between V Two and the original.
[20:19] Mike: Well a lot of times it's because 1 gets banned. For example, there was a subreddit called balls deep and coming they got banned and then there's now balls deep in coming to. Yeah yes.
[20:23] Ally: Um.
[20:25] Keith: Yeah.
[20:30] Ally: And then there's also God Pussy Apprentice oh you need to have a certain amount of karma to post in God Puss If you don't have that much. You can post in God Pussy Apprentice which has many fewer remember.
[20:42] Keith: I mean what? a what a strange emergent culture around who has the best they should do a bracket you know, just take like 64 all time. Yeah, all right? Well, that's god pussy I don't.
[20:42] Mike: Um, make sense.
[20:45] Mike: Say.
[20:49] Ally: Yeah, but fun. Yeah I almost should do a bracket right? like that's yeah, okay.
[21:01] Keith: I mean Mike and I talk about my circumcision pretty often I don't know if we're unusual though I get the feeling might be unusual Mike yeah.
[21:04] Mike: Yes, we're unusual.
[21:08] Ally: Probably it is oh yeah I mean like do you feel like god Dick is less circumcised than you are yeah.
[21:16] Mike: Then then Keith there is it been it's been banned let me check god dick to god big too does not exist god cock I've got to think such a thing exists. Yeah.
[21:18] Keith: Ah I don't know it for starters is there god Dick how let me try god cock.
[21:29] Keith: There is God Cock Do you have a God cock post it on slash our slash Massive cock.
[21:36] Ally: Oo.
[21:39] Mike: Um, no massive cocks just a bunch of pictures of me.
[21:44] Keith: Ah, this is all a wind up for that joke All right, Let's move on to ah some of the topics I teased in the intro here. So ok, here's a guy who claims he doesn't come from blowjobs and this is a woman writing in.
[21:44] Ally: Um, good one.
[21:53] Mike: Wow.
[22:00] Keith: Is this even a thing I've had more than a few guys claim this over the years I've never once just blown a guy who didn't come is a little virtue signaling there I had a friend claim. He doesn't this afternoon and it took me like 6 minutes tops I'm convinced that this is just a thing guys say when they want head at this point works on her. It appears.
[22:18] Ally: Um.
[22:19] Keith: So is it just a clever way of kind of opening me up to accepting that challenge I'm told I give really good head by my friends and hookups bit even still I Just find it hard to believe a guy won't come from having their dicks sucked I don't know I won that little bet again and I'm just wondering what everybody else has experienced huh.
[22:32] Ally: This sounds like she's fallen for this multiple times so I would say yes that is something I say.
[22:38] Mike: Food.
[22:38] Keith: Yeah, her her user name is Miss mumble. Um I wonder I mean her inbox must have just exploded after she posted this.
[22:41] Ally: Okay.
[22:47] Ally: Much like the cock of it. Yeah I But this is more one for you? yeah.
[22:52] Keith: I Think there are men who who don't come from oral now. It's not that it's like impossible. It's that they prefer the control they have in a P I p situation.
[23:09] Mike: They're men I think they're well, they're men who report that online but I think that I would be curious. Ah Allie might have a view on this um is there some sort of curve of probability. So you're giving a guy oral you start and. After some number of minutes. Do you know? He's not going to come from it and if so how many minutes is that and I think this is true for women I would when you say Keith like that. There's some like there's some curve. It's like it's like if if they haven't come by now or if it's not sort of clearly going that direction.
[23:28] Keith: Ah.
[23:35] Keith: Yeah, but it's different. It's different with women because I mean okay I talk about this a lot on this show but I don't know when a woman is going down on me whether I'm supposed to come or not a woman knows she's supposed to come if a man is going down on her because does the sexual encounter isn't as likely to end.
[23:49] Mike: Is that right.
[23:55] Keith: When the woman comes as it is when the man comes.
[23:56] Ally: Yeah.
[23:59] Mike: It's much less likely to end I would say fact I think almost zero end when the woman comes.
[24:00] Keith: Yes I was I was trying to foreclose on people writing in and saying like oh I have a refractory period of two milliseconds you know.
[24:09] Mike: I Hear you that's true.
[24:12] Ally: I think I think the kind position would be to say that unless your partner tells you don't come. You're free to come.
[24:19] Mike: Okay, but yeah, go ahead here.
[24:21] Keith: No that no no, okay, so so the classic example is you're on a first date or sorry you're on a first sexual encounter which may or may not be the first date and ah the the lady starts going down on you now.
[24:27] Ally: And ah.
[24:39] Keith: I'm guessing she would prefer look. There's all kinds of different mitigating circumstances here. But in general she probably doesn't want me to come from that. Yeah me too.
[24:48] Mike: I want to hear Allie reaction to this. Do you care Allie would you care? Yeah, see.
[24:56] Ally: No, um I don't.
[24:58] Keith: Don't you want to know what it's like to have me inside of you like isn't that like something you're sort of like wanting to figure others is the Royal you of course.
[25:05] Mike: Um, yeah Allie don't.
[25:10] Ally: I um I guess maybe if I know that we only have like 20 minutes or something and I definitely want that then I wouldn't want you to come. But.
[25:17] Keith: Um.
[25:21] Ally: Then I might only go down on you for a very short amount of time but I feel like as long as we have you know an hour. So.
[25:23] Keith: Would you intentionally say like would you deploy bad technique to make sure I don't come from your blowjob.
[25:33] Ally: No I think I would just do it for a very brief. You know a minute or something. Um, if the idea is I'm just doing this kind of to to lube you up so that your tick is when um.
[25:37] Keith: Um, okay.
[25:43] Keith: Right? Yeah yeah I think people use blowjobs to like you know help the man get fully hard or whatever. That's a thing. But anyway yes I Do think there's this like asymmetry like women are almost always.
[25:52] Ally: Um, yeah.
[25:59] Keith: Trying to come from a man going down on them.
[26:00] Mike: She just said there isn't an asymmetry you're saying you think there is even though someone's just told you there isn't.
[26:07] Ally: I Think it's complimentary when someone comes because particularly in an early encounter. You don't know if they're a premature ejaculator you're going to assume they're not if they come really quickly I think that implies they're really excited and into you and that would be nice.
[26:21] Keith: I don't I can't do that. Okay isn't it not hard to make a man come.
[26:28] Mike: The.
[26:30] Ally: I Don't know it varies for guys I think it would vary based on like how recently they've masturbated and like what else they're thinking about or doing like.
[26:38] Keith: I see I just feel like it's much less of a gold star getting a man to come than it is getting a woman to come.
[26:46] Ally: Sure Generally yeah.
[26:47] Mike: I mean Keith is also keithsall is also worried about this notion of ending the encounter kind of quickly right? I mean so ah, how much like how much how important would it be for you like would you not would you avoid giving oral to a man until. You were satisfied yourself or something like that because I mean there's this risk you're running this risk once that penis goes in your mouth like your physical gratification is going to end. It could end at any moment. It's like a grenade. Okay, fine.
[27:14] Keith: I would argue that it ends as the dick is in the mouth. But I know people feel differently about that. Yeah I know I know I know women claim to like blow jobs. Yes, giving.
[27:16] Ally: Yeah enough. Um.
[27:22] Mike: Allie definitely doesn't agree with that she enjoys moving clothes jobs.
[27:26] Ally: Yeah, no, you know, historically that you know my position has been that I'm not holding out for me to come but also yeah I think unless I knew of some really short time frame restrictions I would assume that if he comes maybe we do something else. Maybe we you know. Have a drink or something and then go back to bed and then we have Piv sex like that that it could be a whole evening rather than just that he's waiting to come once and then getting yeah out I would assume that I'm around.
[27:55] Mike: Um, and actually by by coming during oral early in the encounter. The man could be showing his virility courage and strength showing what a man he is because he's saying look I can do this again tonight.
[28:04] Ally: Yeah, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[28:08] Keith: Yeah, but that's almost the opposite of the point I'm making what if he's not going to do that like she's saying that it's It's a mid it. His premature ejaculation is mitigated if he's willing and able to go again.
[28:14] Mike: Not going to do what.
[28:27] Keith: But let's say that's not on the table.
[28:29] Mike: Let's say you couldn't do it again. Well then that shows weakness sort of sadness. So yeah, so this.
[28:30] Ally: Exactly yeah well I think Keith is thinking about these times when he wants to go to bed early and he's like thinking that he's only going to bring a woman home for exactly 1 orgasm and that that needs to happen in 20 minutes 1 thing that I've enjoyed doing is you know you you give the guy a blowjob before going out to dinner. You go out to dinner. You come back.
[28:32] Keith: Right.
[28:44] Mike: Interesting.
[28:44] Keith: That's right.
[28:50] Ally: Then you have the Ivy sex. So like now.
[28:51] Keith: Um, yeah.
[28:53] Mike: Doesn't that alter your experience of dinner some I mean not not at all.
[28:56] Keith: It's like a unmused Bush. So then how do you pronounce it.
[28:58] Ally: Oh yeah, do you mean like does dinner taste differently like no, you can drink a glass of water. It's not, you're not like holding it in your mouth but whole if anything it might make dinner nicer because then you're not as 10 like oh you know what's going to happen. Yeah, it's like oh we've already had sex like now there's a little bit more.
[29:03] Keith: 5
[29:05] Mike: Okay, are hungry.
[29:12] Keith: Takes the edge off the hunger. Oh I see I see you need is not is bunch protein in the ah Andre. Yeah.
[29:16] Mike: Life I Thought you wouldn't be as hungry. Sorry.
[29:17] Ally: You know with.
[29:25] Ally: Ah, right? Well yeah then I would I would do that so that I can order vegetarian and you know be nicer. Yeah.
[29:29] Mike: Hang on. So so you would wait. It takes the edge off because but don't you want isn't that edge sort of titillating like you don't know what's going to happen and so forth now you you just want everything to be relaxing and clearly delineated. You don't want that sort of passion and.
[29:47] Ally: If it's the very first time or if there's some kind of uncertainty about whether you're going to have sex. It can be a little bit uncomfortable. You know it it can make you kind of on edge more than I think is ideal.
[29:48] Mike: You know, suspense.
[30:03] Mike: Um, what what factors for a woman would make it so you didn't know on a on a given date if you were going to have sex or not what's a a guy asks you out on a date isn't the woman basically 100% in control of whether sex happens that day.
[30:11] Keith: Um.
[30:18] Ally: No, um.
[30:19] Mike: How how might you not be let's so let's say you decided you're going to have sex this day and you're on a date with this guy and.
[30:24] Ally: Oh I'd see you saying if I really want to know I mean like I've I've gone on dates where the guy you know did not invite me back to his place but instead just set up a second date. Maybe he was assuming that I wouldn't have sex on the first date or you know. Had to go to bed early or something. Um.
[30:43] Mike: But you could have you could have caused yourself to have sex probably so it was just a cultural whereas for a guy if he tried to make it happen. It might be like a crime.
[30:46] Ally: Possibly yeah.
[30:55] Ally: Right? yeah yeah I think on a first date I would try not to be so pushy as to you know, invite myself over and then if he doesn't I assume oh he just wants to be you know or come off as being more chivalrous and he's going to. You know he's going to wait until.
[31:10] Mike: Hi Sam.
[31:14] Ally: Ah, third date or something to ask me. But.
[31:15] Keith: Yeah I feel like at any point you can just throw the Trump card down on the table and be like hey do you want to come in and have sex really quick. Um, but I think almost every man would say yes to that.
[31:27] Ally: Okay, yeah, I've never tried that but that's a good idea right? Yeah things like I mean really quick. Um.
[31:28] Mike: Notice that for Keith the really quick was important.
[31:32] Keith: Um, like I am insanely protective of my time and one of the issues I have when ah I'm in like early relationship situations is yeah like wouldn't.
[31:42] Ally: So.
[31:49] Ally: They're like should I extend my parking and he's like you do not need to do that before we in and out of here.
[31:51] Keith: And yeah, it just don't I don't like not knowing like most people have really crappy sleep hygiene and they like don't care and so like they want to come in. They want to have like two more drinks and then you know.
[31:53] Mike: Um.
[32:07] Ally: Um.
[32:09] Keith: Talk about some horse shit and then and then you know it it feels appropriate to start. You know the ah the proceedings said you know by now it's what ten fifteen p m I mean who stays up that way. Ah yeah, so I yeah just have this issue where um.
[32:28] Ally: Um.
[32:28] Keith: Really like time boxing good. But yeah, like was it last episode Mike or 2 episodes ago where you were like I should just say a a hard stop at whatever time and then it instead of whiny about my beauty rest.
[32:35] Ally: Um, here.
[32:35] Mike: Yeah, sure that makes you sound more like busy and stuff like that it yeah it gives you like a oh yeah, definitely.
[32:46] Ally: Um, I think they might ask if you say I have a hard stop at Eleven P M like what is what is your appointment.
[32:47] Keith: Okay.
[32:53] Mike: Oh that's a fair point I mean I guess you'd be saying I have to go I have to go to bed.
[32:54] Keith: Yeah, it's a fair point. It's a super fair point because yeah, I've said many times like look I Really want to go to bed early tonight and then women think I'm just saying that right? like they don't actually know that I mean what I say I love it and that means I want them Out. By like ten thirty. So I Can you know brush my teeth and um, you know, read my whatever.
[33:21] Mike: Allie if you were on a date with a guy and he was very clear that he wanted to go to bed early and but he still wanted to have sex. It wouldn't I mean wouldn't you take this is like he doesn't really want to get to know you. That's how I would take it.
[33:21] Ally: Um, yeah, um, yeah.
[33:33] Keith: It's not. It's an I don't I think that? yeah.
[33:35] Ally: Ah I mean that is a leading question I yeah I mean when you say that if he said something like Keith did or he's like I have a hard stuff at ten thirty and you need to be fully out of my apartment I would take that as being sort of rude if he just said.
[33:49] Mike: My prostate needs to be totally evacuated and you need to be totally evacuated with the contents of my prostate you get my drift.
[33:51] Ally: Ah, really want to.
[33:55] Ally: Right? Yeah yeah I would not like that if he just said like I want to go to sleep I have to wake up really early, but you know you're welcome to stay over or something that would be fine.
[34:00] Keith: Ah.
[34:07] Keith: Yeah, they are I mean there are some cases where they're welcome to stay over but in general now. Um, yeah ok I have 1 more question about this this guys who claim they don't come from blowjobs.
[34:11] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
[34:24] Keith: So I agree with the the the original poster that a lot of time men are saying that in order to bait her into blowing them and as Allie pointed out it works. But I think the case where like men actually can't is probably some sort of anxiety or anxiousness like given.
[34:34] Ally: Um.
[34:44] Keith: Somebody is you know, an average or better blowjob dispenser I expect that most that's plenty of stimulation for most men and if they can't comments because they're nervous or shy or whatever. Um and and nice.
[34:58] Ally: Yeah I think it would be it would be more common I Just say I can't come from a hand job or something.
[35:03] Keith: I Yeah although I think men might be saying that because they'd rather come in some other way. But yeah, um.
[35:10] Ally: Right? right? yeah.
[35:13] Mike: Allie in the in your life if you had to estimate the percentage of semen producing events that you've experienced that were piv hand job Blowjob. How do you think the breakdown would be and is there some categorym missing. Maybe the guy mutual masturbation.
[35:29] Ally: Oh yeah, um I mean I would say the majority would be piv and then the next high you know, maybe if if it's 60% piv and maybe it's like twenty Twenty five percent below job very small number of. Hand jobs probably more sort of like mutual masturbation than hand job.
[35:49] Mike: Um, would if you were mutually masturbating hang on I'm not done yet if you were mutually masturbating with the guy would you come to or would you fake.
[35:51] Keith: Whoa Mike what are your percentages. Okay.
[36:01] Ally: I Would either come or I would just stop when he came if I felt like it wasn't going to work I don't think I would make it.
[36:05] Mike: Okay, and it and if you're giving a hand job where does the semen go typically the fairies. Okay.
[36:14] Ally: Um, yeah I mean I guess it depends like where I'm positioned like if he's on his back I Guess the seamen just goes like on his stomach. But if he's sort of in front of me then I like yeah wherever effort's sure. Yeah, um I did I slept.
[36:19] Keith: On your and your hand.
[36:25] Mike: Drizzles onto your forehead or are you gonna.
[36:31] Ally: 1 guy who either felt that he couldn't come from piv sex or had some kind of like ocd hangup where like he didn't want to have Piv sex so it was just blowjob and mutual masturbation and so on so that's I guess the the converse of this scenario where there's 1 guy who's like hey I can't come from being inside you.
[36:47] Keith: Would he worried about pregnancy or disease or or I guess pregnancy he would have PIVSex
[36:49] Ally: It can be just no, no I think I think his hangup was much weirder than that I think it was around like Cleanliness O Cd Some kind of phobia of like having I didn't ask and probably.
[36:51] Mike: Now you.
[36:57] Mike: Now. Okay. Wait would he give you oral.. What do you? He wouldn't enter. Okay I was thinking maybe.
[37:08] Ally: Not he would finger me as I recall but.
[37:12] Keith: Is there anything more maladaptive than not wanting to come inside a vagina like that's like the worst possible maladapting like how did his ancestors. Ah.
[37:19] Mike: It's pretty bad does seem like it would be limiting. Um.
[37:26] Ally: Um, yeah.
[37:29] Ally: Well yeah.
[37:29] Keith: Create progeny.
[37:30] Mike: Um, I was thinking maybe he was one of the moderators of God pussy and he's just like look this isn't good. This is this is too wet. This is too wet for me I need it dry the desert.
[37:35] Ally: Me maybe and yeah, no, he had 2 normal siblings. So no, but like his siblings have right? yeah.
[37:37] Keith: Yeah, right right.
[37:44] Mike: Has he had any kids. Yeah, he wait. So this is you're not wait. This isn't a total joke. You wouldn't he wouldn't hang on. He wouldn't put his penis in your vagina.
[37:47] Keith: How could he. I be I guess he could donate sperm.
[38:00] Ally: Correct.
[38:03] Mike: Would he if you wanted to do you Do you think he would have masturbated and had the semen squirt into your vagina you didn't think of that would you.
[38:08] Ally: He masturbated and had this even squirt on my vagina I don't know if any went in. So yeah, yeah, I yeah.
[38:14] Mike: Um, okay so he could have had kids that would work. Yeah, that might have be like prehistorically maybe that's how humans had sex.
[38:16] Keith: Get get a derivation mike. Now I think prehistorically they had piv 6.
[38:29] Mike: You've never obviously never watched a gorilla have sex. They just spurt it.
[38:33] Keith: Ah, this is like the second or third time in our last 10 episodes where ah primate sex has come up.
[38:39] Ally: Um, Mike's been banned from the zoo. Um.
[38:40] Mike: Well, it's how you it's how you know what like humans would genetically evolutionarily do right? her.
[38:50] Keith: That's what that's why you're making such a study ok makes sense. Ok, let's talk about a campsite sex etiquette. So my partner who's a man and I a female are currently traveling around Australia in our rooftop tent. Something we've noticed is we try not to have sex when we're camping in places where we have neighbors. They're up to sixty feet or so away. Although we try to be very quiet. Our tent can make a bit of noise from the bouncing and thrusting I'm wondering if we are being obnoxious or if it is accepted. When camping you will sometimes hear people having sex. Ah, we don't have to talk about this for long but ah I went camping with some friends once and my partner at the time refused to have sex because of this very concern. And then the people we were with we heard having sex and my perspective was ah see we we we could have had sex and her perspective was no see we can hear them having sex and then we had like a little so a little standoff there but you know.
[39:52] Mike: Who.
[39:58] Mike: Do you care if people hear you have sex keith.
[39:58] Keith: We were both right in our own way. No well not in that context now like if I'm well.
[40:05] Mike: What context.
[40:05] Ally: Yeah I think it's perfectly fine to have sex while camping I I've had sex while camping. It's not a big deal.
[40:13] Keith: Do you mind if the people you're with know that you're having sex or did you do it at a time like did you wait until they had left the campsite or did you like go off into the woods somewhere or.
[40:17] Ally: I Guess it.
[40:24] Mike: Um, why don't you give us a preview of the sounds. They'd be likely to hear Allie.
[40:32] Ally: I've I've had sex while camping when I was going camping with my boyfriend and no one else. So the other people who would have heard us having sex for people who just also happens to be around the campsite who we didn't know and I don't care about that I guess if I were going camping with like my family something I would feel differently.
[40:45] Mike: I think that I think the specific sounds do matter. For example, if it's just like bodies maneuvering that could be interpreted as something else if it's you right? If it's the guy like you know you know, get that dick gobble that come.
[40:55] Keith: Ria could just be rummaging around.
[41:04] Mike: You know, saying things like that or the woman saying some female equivalent that's kind of embarrassing.
[41:07] Ally: Yeah, okay I will say if I'm having sex like you know if I'm in a house where there are other people in the next bedroom or something I and my partner will be much less vocal than we would be if we knew no one could hear us. But.
[41:17] Keith: Wait But how is that different from being at a campsite with another couple I guess you were saying you weren't with another couple.
[41:24] Ally: Yeah, and also just that like we're still having sex I don't mind that people hear the you know slapping motions or whatever. It's just that we don't we try not to you know Moan loudly or something.
[41:32] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
[41:37] Mike: The slapping would be a little annoying after a while but but okay, but you don't you don't care if other people hear that she said slapping.
[41:42] Ally: Right? I don't know wet fleshy movements.
[41:42] Keith: Well slapping or clapping. Yeah okay, well slapping is you know hand to face or whatever clapping is more like is like skin coming together.
[41:52] Ally: Oh I mean I don't I don't mind people hearing that either. But yeah, yeah.
[41:54] Mike: Um, no, no, she means she means her so she meant slapping she meant her his pelvis against her all this presumably? yeah.
[42:00] Keith: Right? right? I understand now. Yes, ok all right I think we've oh can I say collectively bargained now because we're 3 okay Tim it would do we need for on or when can I use that.
[42:10] Mike: No now you can't.
[42:17] Ally: Um.
[42:18] Mike: It's just a completely different meaning Keith it's when you're like having a negotiation. Yeah, kind of I mean not not really.
[42:20] Keith: Okay, someday I feel like we were negotiating whether campsite sex was allowed all right can some Ben not feel when a woman is coming when he's inside of her. The guy I'm with can feel when I'm coming every single time even if he gets me off from oral. He'll put. In right afterwards and can still feel my vagina contracting still okay, he says it's like my pussy is milking his stick I've read about women faking it and men weren't aware that they were I'm genuinely curious if some men just can't feel it as intensely as my guy can with me or if some women's vaginas don't contract much or what. So men can you feel when a woman is coming when you're in her so I want to read the first comment here because it's what I would say but I think it's also what someone who is very confused about women lying about orgasms would say so just keep that in mind all right. This person says some women come and it's impossible to tell others become possessed some moan some go silent some have a relaxed vagina the entire time and others squeeze so hard. It's literally pushing you out. There are a lot of different types of orgasms for women. It's a buffet. So yeah, that's been my experience like some I can really tell and some I can't tell at all and. Yeah, Mike's already got his cut his eye up here since Mike thinks that the only orgasms in the history of world have been bestowed by him. But um, yeah, like I mean it. It's tricky here because it is true that some women fake it. It's true that.
[43:43] Ally: Um.
[43:46] Mike: No, not at all.
[43:57] Keith: Some women come differently and so yeah.
[43:58] Ally: I Think a woman who was faking it more expertly would also contract her of a time to simulate.
[44:07] Keith: Um, oh you do see that in porn like they'll like to simulate like you know like leg muscle spasms or whatever and um.
[44:15] Ally: Or just yeah, do you know, kind of the keggel motion to simulate contractions which of course Mike would be able to identify as inaccurate because he knows the precise timing. Um.
[44:15] Mike: That's not yeah.
[44:22] Mike: Yeah, thank you, thank you? Allie.
[44:22] Keith: Well yeah, and he thinks he thinks you'd need like an anal probe because you're looking for sinkter contractions or something.
[44:27] Ally: When does my kind of sex without an an pro like let's ah.
[44:34] Mike: Did you know that the ah astronauts the Mercury astronauts when they went into space. They all had probes up their asses temperature rectal thermometers. So next time you watch like the right stuff just remember that probably.
[44:37] Keith: No, why.
[44:42] Ally: Um, yeah, are those on ebay you get an astronaut Michael.
[44:45] Keith: There's a scene can get ah who is Tom Hanks's character I can't remember ah I did there is a scene in an apollo thirteen where Gary Sinney like
[44:53] Mike: Ah, by that point. Yeah.
[44:57] Keith: Or no Kevin bacon like takes off his oh no Tom Cru's not Tom Cruise Tom Hanks whatever it doesn't matter. He takes off all the medical stuff they have attached to them because they're annoyed hearing from Houston that like their heart rate is elevated when they're going through this like stressful situation but they did not.
[45:13] Mike: So by the time yeah, by the time of the ah the apollo no the apollo missions they didn't they no longer used it was just the mercury astronauts at the very beginning of the space program. You're welcome. Um, but yeah I think Allie's right that and yes in porn they will try to.
[45:14] Keith: Pull out a rectal thermometer which feels like unrealistic.
[45:21] Ally: Um, is.
[45:22] Keith: Ah, thank you for the clarification.
[45:30] Mike: It makes sense to simulate that as well as in porn they will simulate it and you're also right that the timing can be a giveaway. It's the timing and the sort of grow they grow less frequent with a predictable pattern. It's difficult to simulate.
[45:39] Ally: Yeah, okay.
[45:43] Keith: Um, how long do you think the average orgasm lasts Mike.
[45:48] Mike: It depends on exactly what you mean by that but probably 10 seconds maybe last
[45:52] Keith: Do you think you could begin it without PIV and then in certain time to reliably quote still feel the vagina contracting.
[46:05] Mike: So I'm giving her oral and then as soon as she starts orgasming I stick my cock in yeah sure I think it would be annoying for her because you're it's sort of like it's like a female version of a ruined orgasm Actually yeah women women will often say.
[46:12] Keith: Um, yeah.
[46:16] Keith: Ah, yeah, it's that it's textbook growing orgasm.
[46:17] Ally: Um, well.
[46:24] Mike: Do exactly keep doing what you're doing throughout the orgasm. What do you think about that Allie that advice I think it might well I'm not sure what what do you have to say about that.
[46:28] Keith: Um.
[46:31] Ally: I Think that at the very moment of orgasm. It becomes a lot more sensitive and you want them to immediately stop what they're doing but I wouldn't you know, expect them to have that precise timing.
[46:34] Keith: Are.
[46:40] Mike: But it's not a moment right? It lasts for some number of seconds. So when you say you you mean starting when the sensations begin you want cessation of all activity interesting. Do you communicate that to your partners or partner. Well for Fuck's sake.
[46:48] Ally: Yeah.
[46:53] Ally: No I mean I'll I'll usually either try and.
[46:54] Keith: Wait you should Allie you should I have had many partners communicate that to me and it's not offensive at all. In fact, it's like yeah, that's that makes me feel cool. Maybe.
[47:05] Mike: Does your part. Maybe her partner already knows that naturally and so it's not needed to be communicating.
[47:08] Ally: I Think he feels the same way because he wants me to immediately like stop. You know if if I'm giving him a blow job and he starts coming. He doesn't want me to keep you.
[47:16] Mike: Well, he wants you to probably leave the room right runaway he wants you to hold just a tip in his mouth and gently suckle.
[47:24] Keith: Ah I'm good now.
[47:25] Ally: Um.
[47:28] Ally: Not even that I think just like kind of lick it off and then like take my mouth away I feel like it's it seems from when I've kept going that it becomes almost ticklish to him and you know very very sensitive which I think is similar to the way that I feel.
[47:40] Mike: Did you say you want him? did you say he wants you to lick it off.
[47:46] Ally: Yeah to like you know So he's coming and he he wants I think the seamen to end up all in my mouth and not sort of running down his cock. So yeah, how little bit. Yeah yeah.
[47:54] Keith: <unk>bbling down getting onto the bedspread.
[47:55] Mike: So he wants you to lick but that does involve sort of stimulation of the head of his penis but couldn't you just keep it in your mouth and then it sort of naturally goes in your mouth. Why do you need to lick it off.
[48:04] Ally: Get out.
[48:10] Ally: Yeah, okay I guess I could.
[48:14] Mike: Do you understand this Keith so he so so the.
[48:16] Ally: Like instead of taking it out of my mouth just leaving it in and staying very still I think the problem like he's moving around too.
[48:23] Mike: Um, yeah, so when he's orgasming. You actually take his penis out of your mouth.
[48:27] Keith: I See the discussion here.
[48:30] Ally: Pretty soon after ah pretty soon after? um.
[48:30] Mike: Say that again. Oh afterward. Okay, but doesn't most of the semen then just sort of naturally flow into your into your oral cavity there.
[48:38] Ally: Yeah, but so you know there's multiple spurts and maybe like the first two are very strong and then there might be kind of like a driblely one What you wanted to is like make sure that you get whatever's coming out from the driblely one. Also.
[48:47] Mike: I see I see that's pleasant.
[48:50] Keith: Yeah, okay I mean this is 1 reason why I think p I v is a superior way to have an orgasm because like there's only so much. Ah, you know a woman can only do so much to her vagina. So like I can sort of position myself or.
[48:58] Ally: Um, yeah.
[49:00] Ally: Yeah.
[49:07] Keith: Go Balls deep or whatever feels best for me without you know, needing to shout commands at her to like stop applying so much sucking pressure or whatever I would have to say during a blowjob orgasm.
[49:18] Mike: Um, well couldn't you view it as an opportunity to communicate with your partner. Keith.
[49:19] Ally: Ah.
[49:23] Keith: I Could view it that way. Yes.
[49:26] Ally: Like decreased sucking pressure I need to be out of here in 10 minutes
[49:26] Mike: I Mean you could tell them ahead of time That's to go to sleep.
[49:31] Keith: I'm not even sure what like the right I'm not even sure what the right thing that I want is I Guess yeah I haven't had enough blowjob orgasms to like know exactly what my preferences are but.
[49:37] Ally: Ah, and.
[49:46] Ally: Going back to the redditors question. Do you find? There's a difference between So what I think of as a kegel is kind of like a pulling up contraction and then what I think of as like the orgasm contraction is more of like a pushing out contraction. Can you feel the difference or do you think that there is a difference.
[49:48] Keith: Um, ah ha.
[50:04] Mike: That's not right? What you just said there. The the the contractions are the same. It's It's the it's there you go? Yes, it's the contraction you have when you stop urinating right? which I think is you would describe as pulling up. But.
[50:06] Keith: Whoa here comes a bandplaying.
[50:15] Keith: Which which is it. Oh let's say you're midstream and you need to stop suddenly for some reason.
[50:20] Mike: Kegel Orgasmic contraction. Either way.
[50:21] Ally: Um I don't have to do anything just stop peeing. What do you mean.
[50:27] Ally: Oh yeah, okay I mean yeah I guess that would be more like the pulling up.
[50:32] Mike: Okay, what do? what do you mean? you don't have to do anything to stop peeing. What did you mean by that sentence. Oh ok, ok, ok, short sure short. Yeah I met what Keith said sorry.
[50:36] Keith: She means she finishes peeing and doesn't need to like why? Yeah but I made my clarification.
[50:39] Ally: Yeah I don't need to like close it up or anything like it just kind of stops.
[50:47] Mike: Ah, but you're saying that when you orgasm it's more like you're bearing down like for a bowel movement.
[50:52] Ally: No I mean it's they're both vaginal motions I Guess it's just like.
[50:57] Mike: Um, well those are the 2 possible those are the 2 possible motions of those muscles is you can you can I don't think so I don't think so.
[50:58] Keith: Ah.
[51:04] Keith: Maybe maybe there's a third baby there is can you ah ah elucidate Allie.
[51:10] Ally: Um, um, yeah, it's I mean obviously I'm like trying and if the the trying the bow movement thing is definitely a different set of muscles. Um, yeah.
[51:21] Mike: Are you sure you think you have a you think you have a separate set but when you contri when you pull up as you described it. It also tenses your anus doesn't it.
[51:21] Keith: Yeah, okay, that's that's comforting.
[51:28] Ally: Yeah, um I think I have to like feel to be sure. It doesn't seem like it is it involves the clit to pull up more than it does to push down. Um.
[51:35] Mike: Um, it it is sounds right? yeah.
[51:36] Keith: I'm trying right now it kind of does. I think Mike it's at least for me and my anecdotal trying right now not sugar that like pulling back trying to pee it. It is also causing my sphincter to clench. But I think. You know, like when some people you know how some people can't raise like one eyebrow they have to raise them both. It's not that they're actually connected. It's that they're just sort of connected. It's hard not to do one without the other and they yeah exactly.
[52:06] Mike: Um, the.
[52:08] Mike: Um, what are they in that sentence the the anus and the kegel. Okay, but so what is so can you describe more of this sensation. You're you're talking about Allie where you you, it's some. It's some third muscle group that you're employing while you orgasm.
[52:23] Ally: So I mean what I've noticed what I've noticed before from like having a finger inside me all masturbating maybe is that like the the kind of closing that my vagina does in the the orgasm contraction feels more like the pushing down than like the the pulling up. It's not.
[52:25] Keith: Um, it's It's next.
[52:41] Mike: Um, like a bowel movement.
[52:43] Ally: Like ah first of all I don't worry some bowel movements and I don't think that there's any vaginal involvement in a bowel movement.
[52:47] Keith: That you know of.
[52:51] Mike: Well I want to say I just mean pushing out like like ah like ah yeah, bearing down it's It's a movement that would.
[52:55] Ally: Sure Yeah I want to I want to clarify I Never shit while coming and I never will.
[53:06] Mike: Wow. Okay, um, the but the I mean I think that it would be best described as like alternating between the 2 right? It's sort of squeezing and then relate releasing and squeeze.
[53:07] Keith: That's bold statement.
[53:16] Ally: Um, squeing and releasing. Yeah, but not then like pulling up. So 1 thing that you've never experienced is like if you have a tampon in. And you want to like pull the tampon further up like you can do that if it's already partially in at least I can do that I don't know like if you have a tampon I'm showing you but like you have a tampon and it's like partially in and you want to like bring it.
[53:35] Mike: Um, sorry what do you mean by pull it further up.
[53:37] Keith: Um, that's interesting.
[53:41] Keith: Up the vaginal canal.
[53:49] Ally: Further up like you can kind of you can do that? Um, and that's a different motion.
[53:51] Keith: You can shimmy it up using your muscles.
[53:53] Mike: Well doesn't it make sense that that's sort of the I don't think you're shimming it up. It's the opposite of bearing down like so that the way a way a man could experience is that and I'm sure so let's say you're you're doing number 2 and it feels like it's going to come out but then it doesn't and it kind of sucks back into your rectum.
[53:58] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
[54:12] Mike: And sometimes painfully so I'm sure everybody's experienced this before no Keith never ok, ok that pulling up up would be similar to what you're describing right? I mean it's it's just sort of the general area kind of sucking something back in more. You know you could call it that but it's just sort of closing up.
[54:14] Keith: Now of course it's called turtling would it like come comes out and you pull it back in.
[54:30] Mike: And there's a little bit of like negative pressure just like there's positive pressure causing you to something to come out when you bear down. Okay, all right. There isn't I think it's just I think it's just terminological.
[54:37] Keith: All right? Can we can we move on. Maybe there's a third muscle group next to the squirt reservoir. Okay, um.
[54:43] Ally: I am.
[54:49] Keith: Man we only have like 5 minutes but I I won't I want to hit on this because we have Allie here. Okay this this man writes every woman I have had sex with wants to be quote dominated and I hate it to me. It seems like the overwhelming preference for women in the bedroom is to be dominated from talking with partners over time they have said roughly the same things they like the feeling of being desired.
[54:59] Ally: Um.
[55:07] Keith: Like the raw nature of it. They like feeling small or overpowered etc. The thing is though this totally ruins sex for me and it turns me off completely I don't get off at all on dominating my partner and so what this normally means to me is that it's boring and a lot of extraphysical exertion without much reciprocation. Fact I find it to be the opposite power dynamic. It's me doing all the work to please them. But I don't get anything in return since the act of dominating isn't to turn on for me at all just ran into this again the other day I went on a few dates with the woman. We ended up getting a room after the third getting a room she like every other woman I've been with told me she wants to be roughly fucked. And dominated I'm so overdoing it at this point that I played along for 10 minutes until I completely lost interest and then found an excuse to stop and get trust I wonder what excuse he found I have no problem with these women wanting to have sex in a way they enjoy. But what it means for me is that it's extremely difficult to find a partner I'm sexually compatible with at this point.
[55:52] Ally: Get a art stop.
[56:02] Keith: And don't even want to have sex anymore because all I associated with is boring, emptiness and anxiety. How can I either learn to give women like this what they want while finding some enjoyment or find a sexual dynamic I Actually enjoy So I Think this man is right in his general analysis that most women prefer to be. Ah, on the submissive side in the bedroom I don't know what he should do if he hates that I think it's true that most women will be less interested in him sexually if he's not interested and at least being a bit dominant.
[56:36] Ally: Yeah, I'm not sure from what he wrote if he wants to be submissive like if he wants the woman to be dominant to him or he just wants everything to be like really caring and gentle and slow like.
[56:44] Keith: Yeah, he doesn't go. Yeah, it's um, it's ambiguous.
[56:48] Mike: I Think he wants to be pegged. There's only so much as a guy that you can do to be submissive I mean within the context of like what I would call like a typical heterosexual sexual act. It's that's somewhat limited.
[56:54] Ally: Um, that's an option.
[57:03] Keith: Um, that's a fair point right? So you can have the woman be on top is that the end of the list.
[57:13] Mike: Allie. What's the most dominant thing that you've done in the bedroom. Okay, so she's she's she's laughing. She's pegged a guy.
[57:14] Ally: Um.
[57:21] Ally: No, not that I wouldn't I just haven't unfortunately um sure I would try it. Um.
[57:23] Mike: Oh you want to right? Why don't you you.
[57:27] Keith: No, you got a key master here. You got to find the gatekeeper.
[57:32] Mike: And but what is the yeah.
[57:33] Ally: I don't yeah I don't think I've done very many sort of dominant things in the bedroom I guess I've like held a guy's wrists down but not in any serious way like he obviously could have taken his wrists back.
[57:43] Mike: Um, and was that was that for fun for you or was it to turn him on was it because he wanted you to dominate him some have you ever have you ever tied a guy up Huh I've been tied up before.
[57:44] Keith: Um, yeah.
[57:50] Ally: Now I think just fun for me. No no.
[57:55] Keith: Yeah, that's the that's sort of the classic man being a bit submissive.
[58:00] Mike: Yeah I've been tied up before and the problem was there that there was nothing for her to do. It was just stupid. It will yeah frankly was kind of stupid so was like oh this didn't yeah it's like it's like yeah she doesn't have any body parts that protrude. It's like like okay.
[58:06] Ally: Right.
[58:17] Keith: Can you elaborate on that though Mike like what I mean she can ride you she could um she could ride your face I guess and then you you could tend to not be able to stop it or something.
[58:22] Mike: Um, yeah I mean it she a little but it doesn't but it's like kind of yeah, it's better if you can move your body around and also like your hands can be important in that position. So it's kind of lame like it just what? yeah I just wound up being like kind of a no op. It was like well.
[58:34] Keith: Um, yeah.
[58:38] Mike: Yeah I mean so yeah, she tried that I don't remember that specifically but I just remember it being like it wound up being just her for her like how like basically pleaasuring a a mannequin or something like it just was like it's kind of important that the man's body be active in sex for it to be interesting.
[58:41] Keith: Right.
[58:47] Ally: Fun.
[58:51] Keith: Right? Yeah, right? Yeah I mean and you've implied this but I'll just make it explicit. Yeah I mean missionary and doggy are both men in control positions and so it's not even exactly clear what he wants I mean maybe she's starfishing and that's boring. But. Presuming She's being like or I mean he's described a number of partners here. So Probably they're not all like that. But yeah presuming they're being normal women like I'm not sure exactly what he's hoping for.
[59:21] Ally: I think it's yeah I think it's weird that he would say that everyone he's been with before the first encounter has said I want you to be really dominant I don't know where he's finding partners. But yeah, if if all he wants is just to have you know, slow gentle sex.
[59:39] Keith: Yeah I I think Mike Jumps to conclusions too quickly. But in this particular case like just reading between the lines of this. It's not clear what he actually wants and so it might be.
[59:40] Ally: Maybe he should say that upfront.
[59:57] Keith: That Yeah, what he actually wants is something like to be pegged or some sort of much more dominant behavior from the women. He's with.
[01:00:05] Ally: Yeah I mean if he wants that he could ask for that and yeah I guess a combination of.
[01:00:05] Mike: Um, yeah.
[01:00:08] Keith: No most women present company excluded are not going to be into that I suspect.
[01:00:15] Mike: I don't think that Allie would like it I think Alie would be unhappy with it if you're like oh I'll try it out but this gets back I mean this is one of the reasons one of the several reasons why I say Keith doesn't want to be on the recipient side of this is that what if the guy likes it and then. It becomes a required activity. So now. Let's let's say okay fine. You try it once but let's say every second time you have sex you have to peg him that would that might not be your favorite thing right.
[01:00:35] Keith: Um.
[01:00:38] Keith: Yeah, you you have to get the apparatus out of the bedside table. Yeah.
[01:00:42] Ally: Right? Yeah, yeah, it's more like I would do it if it were a one night stand or something or something that he just wanted to try.
[01:00:47] Mike: Um, yeah, and then you're like one day you come home and he's got. He's bought one of those ah fucking machines that's like ah that's like he's just like bed over the bed being fucked by this dildo and you're just like I'm out of here like that's see ya.
[01:00:59] Ally: Yeah, no I don't I don't want that speaking of which did you guys get that cocking that somebody said okay.
[01:01:01] Keith: Ah, yeah.
[01:01:04] Mike: It hasn't I haven't got it yet. we we there's a person that wants us to interview them that has a cock ring that measures your you really you really listen assiduously to the episodes Allie think that was at the very end last episode.
[01:01:11] Ally: Oh yeah, it's like a scientific cockering. It's not just playing.
[01:01:19] Mike: It's I'm not totally sure but they want it. You know it's no, it's it has some health benefits purported health benefits and they want to do an interview. Yeah now then there's the problem of I think only one of us can test it probably.
[01:01:24] Keith: He wants to talk about that's right? So that's so we requested the device so that we could um know what we're getting into so to speak I know we both get. It's just I have to go first. Yeah.
[01:01:26] Ally: Oh okay.
[01:01:39] Mike: Ah, that's great. It's right, That's email.
[01:01:41] Ally: Ah, because Mike is going to stretch it out.
[01:01:44] Keith: No, that's that no that was not the implication. Ah you guys are the worst. Okay, that's it. That's it for this episode I got I'm going to wrap it that will do it for this episode of your mileage may vary.
[01:01:48] Mike: Ah, it's true. But.
[01:01:56] Keith: You can send his feedback or questions to ymmvpod at Gmail.com that's why mmvpod at Gmail.com we pay $10 for any and all feedback received so just let us know which payment platform you prefer and you could be $10 richer even today thanks to allie thanks to bike. We appreciate you taking the time to listen to our little show here and we look forward to having you back next week on your mileage may vary.
[01:02:14] Ally: And.

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Episode 140: Cis-Orgasms, Failure To Launch Orally, Feeling Her Climax, Campground Sex Noises

Episode Transcript