Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.
[0:02] Keith: I don't find porn without a man in it. Compelling. I
[0:05] Mike: think you're not spoke, not hang. Hang on. That can't be right. I mean,
[0:12] Keith: I mean, look, that's a strong statement like that. And, like, you know, like, immediately people are going to go Well, you know, isn't it? No, it's not.
[0:27] Keith: Okay. It's interesting to watch. Like a porn of a woman masturbating. I'm like, you know, that that could be arousing, but I prefer porn where she's actually getting fucked.
[0:40] Keith: Greetings and welcome to your mileage may vary. I am Keith. My co host is Mike. Your mileage. Mayberry is a show about sex and relationships. We take a look at myriad sexy topics with an imperfect blend of seriousness and humor.
[0:50] Keith: Please subscribe to us on your favorite podcast staff. We also have a Facebook group, unsurprisingly named your mileage may vary. And an email address. Why? Mm. Peapod at gmail dot com.
[1:00] Keith: Um, okay, Mike. So I have two more tips from the woman who has sex 10 times a week with new partners each time. But did you have anything else you wanted to chat about before we get into that?
[1:03] Mike: No, I mean I hope you're putting air quotes around. Woman on that. But go on.
[1:11] Keith: Right. Yeah. Fair enough. Okay, so the 1st 1 it Well, the first of the last two are
[1:29] Keith: she says, say something during sex. I find the guys love it when I even say simple things like, keep fucking me like that or that's so hot. And I would love to hear something like that in return. So yeah, don't just be quiet. You're thinking to yourself, Should I say it or not? The answer is always say it, especially when I'm taking my clothes off and feel vulnerable. That is a good time for a compliment.
[1:41] Keith: So, uh, yeah, I mean, I generally agree that people like getting good sexy feedback, but I think theat vice that you should say it, no matter what you're thinking is maybe not exactly right.
[1:45] Mike: Yeah, well, I mean, this reminds me that Dave ship l. A thing where it's like, uh,
[1:48] Mike: men like it if you tell them where to come.
[1:51] Mike: Even if it's in, like, an absurd, You know what I'm talking about, right? Like it's like
[1:53] Keith: I actually don't know this kid, but I can imagine the setup.
[1:56] Mike: Yeah, well, it's just like it's like, you know,
[2:01] Mike: a guy finds it hot Even if you say something like, you know, come over in that potted plant
[2:05] Mike: or whatever. It just doesn't matter, right? They just want you. They want the guy wants the woman.
[2:08] Keith: Tonto, Tonto, Permission to come. It's nice.
[2:24] Mike: And the fact and like, there's something about, like the guy wanting the woman to care where he comes. So it's like, Yeah, you want me to come in your shoe? Okay. Uh and so, yeah, I mean, like theirs. But the reason I bring that up actually is because I think he's right. I think Dave Chappelle's right. I think it's his joke. Ah,
[2:31] Mike: in that like, yeah, and I think that has the guys find that attractive likes hot for a guy. And I think that's because
[2:42] Mike: you guys want to have the be persuaded by the fantasy that the woman actually cares where he nuts men obviously care a lot. What were they not like? That's you have, like, facial porn and, like,
[3:06] Mike: you know, all these kinds of corn. Uh, and the reason I bring it up is that the opposite direction I'm not so sure. I'm not so sure I find what she's quote unquote. She is saying believable there that women care about, like some guy saying some clever thing to them during sex. Like I'm trying to imagine. Like Like I mean, I don't know. What would you imagine to be the sentence that a woman wants to hear?
[3:08] Keith: Um,
[3:15] Keith: the thing example she gives is keep fucking me just like that or that so hot, I think. I mean, this sounds like
[3:27] Keith: she sounds like a man of sort of. Yeah, it does. But I think she's trying to assuage some sort of insecurity, Right? So getting feedback that, like what she's doing is feeling good, I think is what she's looking for their
[3:32] Mike: hang on but isn't okay. I mean, actually, I get confused by this sometimes, because, like isn't
[3:39] Mike: in, like, normal discussion, isn't it? The man who's doing the fucking and the woman is receiving the fucking
[3:52] Mike: you know. So So normally. So in other words, when you said that sense keep, I think defense was keep fucking me like that. Was that just like that? And just like that, that would be a sentence I would expect a woman to say to a man,
[3:53] Mike: Right,
[3:58] Keith: Well, I mean again at the air quotes for whether this person is a woman in the first place period.
[4:00] Keith: Yeah,
[4:03] Keith: I think she's looking for
[4:11] Keith: some sort of confirmation that the person is currently attracted her like it's hard for me to imagine, like a girl
[4:16] Keith: being insecure about how she looks or it's not hard for me to imagine, but like, it's
[4:21] Keith: like matter generally, like pretty obviously enjoying themselves, right?
[4:23] Mike: Yeah, for sure. I mean, yeah, I think,
[4:29] Keith: but maybe, yeah, I mean, maybe women have, like, a flood of insecurities around this. I'm like getting like regular feedback
[4:36] Keith: once a minute or so with some sort of not sweet. Nothing but hot. Nothing is Ah is beneficial.
[4:39] Mike: Well, hang on. There's a couple things I want to say about that. First is
[4:51] Mike: I actually think that's one of the find things I find difficult about. Sort of hyper professionally produced porn. Is it actually very professional porn? The men don't seem like they're enjoying themselves,
[4:57] Mike: and I think that sort of takes me out of it. I'm like, like, this is it's just clearly like a job with this guy and like it's like Come on, man, like you
[5:00] Keith: guys, it's It's almost perfunctory,
[5:02] Mike: Like I actually think that
[5:04] Mike: one of the I mean, it's weird because I know that
[5:22] Mike: as a man, I'm supposed to not care at all about the man in the performance. I understand that. But like I think for me just being honest about it that, like if the guy is not sufficiently into it, like it's a bummer for me because, like the just feels it's feels unrealistic if it's just not believable, it's like, sort of robotic, then, like
[5:32] Keith: because of what you said, Yeah, I mean I mean, there's a couple things to impact your I mean, first off, I don't find porn without Amanda in a man in it. Compelling.
[5:32] Keith: I
[5:35] Mike: think you're not supposed No, hang Hang on. That can't be right. I mean,
[5:52] Keith: I mean, look, that's a strong statement like that and like, you know, like, immediately people are going to go Well, you know, isn't it? No, it's not look okay. It's interesting to watch, like porn of a woman masturbating and like, you know, that that could be arousing, but I prefer porn where she's actually getting fucked
[6:02] Mike: and noticed that you used, in my view, the word the verb fuck properly there, Right. The woman is receiving the fucking thank you, right? Yeah. You know, I'm not. It's not right.
[6:08] Mike: Thank you. Think it's just like one of the things that I found confusing, like by the reason I say that is that there are
[6:22] Mike: You do see women, but not women. You see, people, he used the word the opposite direction, like a woman will be like, I fucked him. And I always find that confusing like, because in my brain fucking is, like the inserting of one object in another. And I'm like, but
[6:23] Mike: so I guess
[6:31] Keith: I think Okay, if if okay, if a woman was on top of you and sort of grinding herself against you, you could imagine saying, Keep fucking me just like that.
[6:34] Mike: I could imagine it. But when I hear it, I always think of pegging.
[6:43] Keith: Sure. Oh, it's straight up. Sure. Okay. Okay. Yeah. I mean, I think that yeah, I mean, there's sort of like a framework in your mind that is a little bit
[6:46] Keith: not quite exactly right, But I don't think you're being crazy.
[6:51] Mike: It's rigid. It's rigid. I know, but Okay. So what was the point? You were making them.
[6:52] Keith: Ah,
[6:59] Keith: well, I'm saying that it's Oh, well, you were saying something about like yet. Like, if the man looks like he is not
[7:08] Keith: into its in professionally produced porn, which is pretty common, like turn off. Yeah, I agree with that, but yeah, I guess my counterpoint was,
[7:17] Keith: uh yeah, it is sort of important. It's more interesting if there's if there's a man actually delivering the sexual pleasure to the woman for my enjoyment of the porn,
[7:20] Mike: right? Right. I mean, I
[7:23] Mike: Well, I mean, the the counterpoint I would do There is
[7:26] Mike: some sort of lesbian porn could be hot,
[7:30] Mike: but it's true. I mean, I think that for me, I think it just comes down to like you.
[7:38] Mike: I think that men typically, like, put themselves in one of the roles in the porn. And so if there's no male role in the porn in
[7:41] Mike: it, like becomes harder to, like, get into the fantasy.
[7:50] Keith: Yep. I agree. I think that's what's going on in my head. Do you think? OK, do you think One more thing on this, like sexy talk thing. Do you think it's possible? Like,
[7:53] Keith: uh, yeah. Can you say something?
[8:01] Keith: I I think that the blanket advice that, like you should say whatever you're thinking is not good. Like, I think some people are more comfortable
[8:06] Keith: saying, you know, quote unquote hot things than than others. And
[8:13] Keith: some people should probably keep their mouth shut because they're going to say things that actually lower her arousal.
[8:16] Mike: I really hard to say, like I mean, on
[8:16] Keith: some
[8:26] Mike: level, it makes sense to me that they would a woman, actually a lot of levels. It makes sense to me they would want various things to be said because, like, I'm gonna like
[8:49] Mike: the sort of typical thing is typical way of viewing. This is that men are more visual and women are more sort of like fantasy oriented. So there's like, you know, there's like a whole genre, their whole genres of female quote unquote porn that are like literature, erotica and, um, audio like just sounds, and this is like commonly consumed by women. And so then that makes sense naturally that they would
[8:53] Mike: be interested in you saying things. I think it's,
[8:56] Mike: I think that the things it's,
[9:06] Mike: I think that usually the things that gets said are like, Yeah, indicating how much you're enjoying it, how much pleasure they're giving you. So it's like that kind of a thing. I'm not sure
[9:12] Mike: I don't know. I mean, I guess I guess you could also say, like talk about how hot they are, something like that in porn happens a lot.
[9:22] Mike: I Yeah, I'm a little. It's a little unclear to me what, like the opted like, Let's say you were trying to say the optimal things you're like really dialed in on that I'm not even sure what it would be. It would probably be
[9:25] Mike: very different for each person because it's like a fantasy thing, right?
[9:41] Keith: I My suspicion is there's like a universe of, like, sort of you could develop like a quiver of like 20 to 30 things and, you know, they're mostly applicable. I mean, you have to know, Went went to deploy each one, but ah
[9:54] Keith: yeah, I think if you don't have such a quiver, uh, it's probably better to not say anything or like, yeah, I I guess my concern is yet like saying something, uh,
[9:58] Keith: dorky or uncomfortable. While it could be endearing to,
[10:04] Keith: you know, certain partners, like especially if it's like an early sexual encounter. Like, I think that could be sort of bad and take them out of the moment. Yeah,
[10:24] Mike: I'm also thinking like, Let's say that you I mean, it could be any body part, but let's say you say a sentence that draws attention to a particular one of her body parts. It's like that's a minefield, right? Because, like, some woman might really think her legs or unattractive and like, if you say that she's immediately way less aroused,
[10:26] Keith: yes, she lasers it on it and yeah,
[10:34] Mike: right. And so So I mean, it's like, now you're talking it here. And so so I mean, this could actually explain why guys are reluctant to say things is because it's like,
[10:40] Mike: yeah, I mean, like, it's a minefield. It's so much more complicated than simply doing actions.
[10:47] Keith: Yeah, well, I mean, there have been security is too, so I think, you know, sometimes they don't want to say things because, you know, they have their own
[10:51] Keith: sort of, you know, things that are going on in their minds. It sounds
[10:54] Mike: to me like you have something to reveal here.
[10:57] Keith: I
[11:02] Keith: like coming up with, like, the right sexy thing to say is a little bit
[11:03] Keith: is a little bit tricky.
[11:08] Mike: You're actually you're actually Ah, uh, reluctant to, because you're worried about getting tongue tied.
[11:23] Keith: I don't know about tongue tied, but yeah, I do not have the quiver that I just, uh, you know, suggested might be useful to have. I do think I could learn how to do this. And I have seen, like, some reddit threads. And maybe maybe I'll look for one for the for the next show, where
[11:27] Keith: people give tips on unlike sexy things to say,
[11:32] Mike: Wait, what do you usually say that? And also I'm going. What do you usually say?
[11:35] Keith: I don't usually say very much as a consequence of mine.
[11:38] Mike: You just say things like this is great.
[11:39] Mike: I love That's
[11:42] Keith: really nice. I like it. I like the way this feels. And then
[11:47] Mike: occasionally you'll actually let slip like a commentary on, like the latest Netflix show,
[12:03] Keith: right? Right. Exactly. Is a total total disaster of about No, no, but yeah, like I don't. Yeah, I guess I'm like concerned. I'll say something that it's not. It's not that it's, like, not appropriate. It's just that it's not, uh, you know, delivered properly or something. I don't know. Um,
[12:17] Mike: do you Let me ask you this to Do you ever feel Do you ever sort of feel like you have to put on a show a little bit verbally like, uh, making more like moons or something than you would save when masturbating in order to, like, put on a show for the girl?
[12:18] Keith: Uh,
[12:30] Keith: no. Well, no, I don't think so. I might I might moan a lot. I might make some noises that that imply that I am.
[12:40] Keith: Yeah, that that's sort of like, make it seem like I'm enjoying myself. But I mean, generally, it's like it's not that I'm not enjoying myself. It's that, like I'm doing it, too,
[12:42] Keith: confirmed that I'm enjoying myself
[12:43] Mike: right.
[12:45] Mike: You're like putting on a show a little bit.
[12:51] Keith: I guess it's not a show implies that it's not genuine.
[13:00] Keith: It's that it's not natural for me to ah give aural feedback. A u r l uh,
[13:01] Mike: no, I mean one of the like
[13:08] Keith: sometimes sort of like encourage myself to do so because I think that that might make my partner feel more comfortable.
[13:15] Mike: There. There threads on Reddit, a fairly often on the sex subreddit, about women liking to watch their men masturbate,
[13:21] Mike: their significant other whatever masturbate. And I always think that's strange because I'm like, you know,
[13:22] Keith: hard for me to believe
[13:26] Mike: it's hard to believe for a variety of reasons. But one of the reasons is I think that, like
[13:33] Mike: if a woman saw that, she'd be like, Wow, you have just no reactions It's just like you're staring at a monitor.
[13:34] Mike: I'm saying,
[13:55] Keith: Yeah, yeah, I mean, maybe they enjoy watching the masturbate if they're doing it is like part of a show, like they know that they're being watched and they're trying to do it, you know, they're like looking at at their partner, and the partner is able to like, sort of feel herself is like the object of their sexual desire, like maybe there but like, nobody wants to watch me, like from the other side of my monitor,
[14:01] Keith: jerking off like that's right here just like that. It's like one of the least sexy things I could possibly. D'oh! It's
[14:04] Mike: like the dead eyes of, like, an executioner or something
[14:05] Mike: like
[14:09] Keith: it's not, like quickly clicking around from, like, stimulus to stimulus.
[14:14] Mike: And your eyes are just going from, like, chest to crotch to face to chest crotch to face. Yeah,
[14:22] Keith: right, Right. And that that doesn't see seem attractive. Okay, let me get to this to this woman's last tip. So, um,
[14:47] Keith: I don't think we went over this last year. Remind me if you don't like her. She said she says, if you want to come, just come seriously. Don't hold back or stop halfway just to put it off. Very baffling for me breaks the rhythm and certainly don't think that going for a literal our makes you feel any more attractive having sex with you. I like you. I want you to feel happy. You can always go again if you want to. Don't hold back. What is okay for starters, do we Do we do this one before? No. Okay. What is theater Pro pri. It amount of time.
[14:58] Keith: Well, given that like this. Okay, so this person has sex with new partners 10 times a week supposedly, Um given that this person is you're having a first time sexual encounter with this person.
[15:14] Keith: And let's say she hasn't communicated well to you. Like what gives her an orgasm and whether she's had an orgasm in these kinds of things. Like, what is the appropriate amount of time to have sex with someone before you? You can feel sort of reasonably liberated to orgasm.
[15:24] Mike: Well, I mean, this gets back to this fundamental issue of what percentage of women even are going to orgasm from intercourse, which is not as high as you want it to be.
[15:34] Keith: Yeah, I mean, well, yeah. I mean, that's sort of generally unknown with this person. Like, you know, seems like a fairly sexual person. Maybe, but you don't know her well enough to know like it's It's for the sake of this conversation. Let's say it's unknown.
[15:36] Mike: Yeah, look, I mean,
[15:48] Mike: yeah, I mean, like, it's just like, how much? How much disbelief do you want? I haven't. Haven't you wanna, like, ignore the reality of what's going on here? Like she's not having an orgasm because you don't know where that well, like women on first and second
[15:56] Mike: sexual acts with the same guy like whatever 1st 2nd 3rd time. They have sex like their orgasm frequencies very low, like This is
[16:06] Mike: data. This is like there's there's multiple research surveys on this, like, you know, So how long you go? I mean, I think in that context, it sort of doesn't matter. It's like
[16:07] Mike: it
[16:16] Keith: doesn't matter, though, Like it does matter because, Well, yeah, okay, So I think we can agree that, like 20 seconds would be bad, right? She's gonna think poorly of you. It's your I don't
[16:28] Mike: think so Have I think that's actually I think that's actually from my extensive reading of the sex subreddit. I think that's actually like, not true. I think that she would be flattered. I think maybe not.
[16:40] Mike: I don't think she would care that much and maybe flatter, but probably just nothing. I mean, because the thing is like, anyway, they're repeated threads on that sub Reddit, where women are trying to reassure men that not lasting very long, is fine now. That being said,
[16:42] Mike: like if you are
[17:06] Mike: far, relatively far into a relationship and let's see if let's say you're like the guy who's like look, once I once. I not, I'm just done. And you're not in 20 seconds. Will. Then yes. A little selfish. Well, yeah, it's it's that. But like, let's say that your experience is that you give her an orgasm and then you're not in 20 seconds. I think almost no women care about that. I think that I actually think that in today's day and age of porn and guys with, uh,
[17:08] Mike: what's the word? The word you were You
[17:12] Mike: what's what's thing we were talking about last time? Were guys masturbate too much? It's death grip
[17:18] Mike: or in the female equivalent, white claw. Um,
[17:20] Mike: be ah,
[17:21] Mike: no, perfect for for good.
[17:23] Keith: We should try to make that happen for
[17:25] Mike: sure.
[17:35] Mike: But for, ah, for guys with the with the death grip like then they're gonna go too long. And actually, my impression is that, like what this actually person is saying is that like there's a stain. Were guys
[17:48] Mike: last for like an hour, and I don't think that's all about the guy trying to impress the woman. I think a lot of that is death grip, like it's just like the like. I think that I have a suspicion that over the last, like 30 years. That's changed significantly
[17:51] Mike: because you guys just have so much access.
[17:56] Keith: I don't really have that problem with new sexual partners.
[17:57] Keith: Um,
[18:01] Keith: but it's pretty. It's pretty fun to have a new sexual partner
[18:02] Keith: like it's,
[18:07] Keith: you know? I mean, for me anyway, it's not difficult to have an orgasm,
[18:10] Keith: is quickly aside with, like with the new sexual part.
[18:25] Mike: Wait, what do you think that what do you What do you think like the back off is on that then. So, like on the sea, you're saying on the first time you could, How long would like, Let's say, Let's say that you were doing nothing to stop it. What do you think like the natural period of time would be on the first encounter with a new partner?
[18:29] Keith: How How quickly can I have an orgasm if I'm trying to have an orgasm is quickly. No,
[18:37] Mike: no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm saying, let's say that it like you do nothing to delay it, and you do nothing to advance that. You just do whatever you want to do.
[18:39] Keith: I go through my normal routine,
[18:40] Mike: Yes,
[18:43] Mike: but But it looks like importantly, like
[18:54] Mike: she doesn't She's fine with anything. So, like, you're not sitting like that's the point. Like how long and what I'm interested in here is like on the 10th Encounter with the same person. How long do you think it would take? Like I'm interested in that Delta?
[19:01] Keith: I mean, this is tricky. For starters, I feel like a lot of sexual encounters are
[19:04] Keith: just generally
[19:06] Keith: trying not.
[19:07] Keith: I mean,
[19:15] Keith: sex feels really good. Like it's It's like it's pretty easy to have an orgasm if I want to. Um, sure. But there
[19:25] Mike: must be some like you. What? The impression I got from what you said Was that the first time with a new partner, actually, like you might be in the category of, like, tryingto hold back from orgasm? Me too soon?
[19:27] Keith: Yeah, I think I am. So I feel like
[19:32] Keith: So when does that concern? You think that's not the case for most people know that?
[19:42] Mike: I'm not sure. That's why I'm asking. So I mean, like, when does that concern start like is it started? One minute, 10 seconds at two minutes. Look, at what point are you like shit? And I need to think about baseball here.
[19:45] Keith: Ah,
[19:49] Keith: there's there's too many. Like there's too many variables here. Like, Well,
[19:52] Mike: certainly after the 10th time, it's much slower, right?
[20:04] Keith: Yes. Yeah. Everything else being equal later. Sexual encounters are less arousing than the earlier ones. Sure, but everything else is his temper equal, right, that it's hard to
[20:24] Keith: control for all the variables here. And like everything else, being equal isn't even like the right way of saying it. Like everything else being equal. Like subsequent ones are, like way, way, way, way, way more boring. Like your novel nous is a pretty important value. Um, so, like, yeah, if you're going through, like, the exact same routine than its,
[20:37] Keith: that's gonna be much longer. Okay. So Okay, but it started. It's, like, hard to set up even a hypothetical thing here. But, I mean, I definitely agree that, like, I don't know if I agree, but I definitely think that, um,
[20:43] Keith: yeah, like later sexual encounters with the same person or less arousing. And but I don't know how to get, like, a good, like, controlled measurement of that.
[20:46] Mike: Okay, But you're never going for an hour.
[20:51] Keith: Uh, not unless you know, I'm wearing four condoms or something.
[20:54] Mike: I see you probably could if you had to. The right.
[20:58] Keith: Uh, yeah, yeah. You know, gunpoint or something? Sure,
[21:01] Mike: Not at gunpoint. But even on the first encounter, you could
[21:07] Mike: I think so, Yes. Okay, so I mean that, surely. Okay, so this is all just like this. See?
[21:20] Mike: Ah, thing that the person okay. And the other thing is like, What if you stop consuming porn at all for, like, a month? Do you think it would get harder to go for now? And I ask this because there are definitely men who could not go for an hour.
[21:21] Keith: I see.
[21:24] Keith: Maybe younger men.
[21:31] Mike: I think that well, yeah. I mean, I think there's also, like, some sort of syndrome the guys have where they just have, like, premature ejaculation.
[21:32] Mike: Premature. That's a weird word.
[21:38] Keith: Okay, I don't know, but premature ejaculation is such a weird thing. Like
[21:59] Keith: some of it is just like selfishness, right? Like, you know, it is sort of on you Does, like control yourself. Um, like, most of the time. If I if I wanted to, especially with the new sexual partner, like I could get in there and like orgasm, like pretty much as quickly as I would like. Um, so it's a matter of
[22:07] Keith: yeah, you like that. I think some people are just, like, not paying attention and are being and are being selfish. But then I think there might also be a thing where
[22:12] Keith: some people's orgasm sort of like, rise faster than others. Um
[22:25] Keith: so, like, for me like it? If I feel like I'm getting close, I could sort of back off of it. But maybe, like, some folks don't have that like, they just it comes so fast, and then it's gone like that. They were not able to pull back in time to avoid it. Oh,
[22:28] Mike: definitely. They have that anyway. Yeah. I mean this. I think
[22:34] Mike: this person's thing about guy lasting an hour is just, you know, like that, right? I mean, like,
[22:41] Mike: whatever I think that's mostly from guys thinking that if they go really long time, the woman will have a vaginal orgasm. Frumpy ivy.
[22:47] Keith: Yeah, you know, she'll be impressed with this stamina or thinks he sees some sort of sexy no e.
[22:53] Mike: I don't think that's a thing for women, really. I mean, It's in the popular culture of stamina and stuff. But
[22:56] Mike: I think mostly stamina is just referring to the guy lasting more than, like, two minutes.
[23:02] Keith: Yeah, I think so, too. Yeah, yeah, there's some point beyond which you're not getting
[23:10] Keith: any incremental value. And then there's some point beyond that where you're getting diminishing returns, nothing, not diminishing returns. You're getting negative returns. And I think
[23:16] Mike: I personally think that that point is surprisingly early in the act. I think it's, I think, like
[23:21] Mike: I'm gonna say, between five and 10 minutes. I think you start getting going to start going downhill for the woman.
[23:22] Keith: Yeah,
[23:33] Keith: I agree. But I I also think that there's a point before which she's definitely going to think something negative.
[23:35] Mike: Yeah, I like, but I think that point is like,
[23:37] Mike: Okay,
[23:39] Mike: I think it depends. I think
[23:42] Keith: defensive. She's had an orgasm, you know?
[23:51] Keith: But it's happening every single time rights, right? Right. But let's say this is your first sexual encounter. She you know, she has not had an orgasm before penetration and,
[24:03] Keith: you know, here you go, like, yeah, I mean, I think if you I think if you came in 20 seconds, she would potentially be mildly annoyed. She might. I mean, look, there's also that she might be mildly flattered,
[24:04] Keith: but
[24:11] Keith: yeah, I think in the main her emotion would would be more likely toward annoyance or or or
[24:13] Keith: or
[24:14] Keith: concern.
[24:28] Mike: Yeah, I don't think so. I think that it's, I think, mostly they just wouldn't care. And that, like the by far, the more important things are all the other things that happened on the date. I think that, like by the time you're having sex for the first time,
[24:30] Mike: like that's not.
[24:34] Mike: That's not like the main thing that she cares about from what's happened,
[24:36] Mike: you know, it's just like
[24:37] Mike: I think that
[24:42] Keith: the thing because even if you think even if it's 20 seconds in, she's not gonna
[24:46] Keith: I mean it's her sample size at this point is one. I
[24:52] Mike: think I think it would be notable. Maybe she would notice it, but I just don't think she would care, because I think that like look, when
[24:56] Mike: when women are like going over on their heads, what happened in a date?
[25:00] Mike: I think they're thinking way more about other stuff than that, I think, like,
[25:02] Mike: yeah, I just don't think they care.
[25:22] Keith: There was an episode. There's this terrible television show called you about this, like stalker who, like the stocks, this woman and hey eventually starts dating her and had sex with her. And I think he comes within, like, 20 seconds. And there's like an entire episode about this. I think
[25:40] Keith: regardless of the reality of the situation like the cultural zeitgeist is that that's like an embarrassing, shameful thing. Oh, definitely, definitely. What you're saying here is actually sort of interesting because of that. Like I I think you might be right that generally she doesn't care and like you're gonna get another chance to sort of, you know, prove your mettle. Um, I don't think
[25:45] Mike: women like this is like a purely male thing. Like, I don't think that women view it that way. I think that, like
[25:52] Mike: if you were totally not attentive, meaning that, like you, just immediately went to P. I V and 20 seconds later you went to bed,
[26:05] Mike: then that's different. But like is a lot, you know, But like, I think it's all the other things that happen outside those 20 seconds that matter more and also like I think it would be. I think there's a point at which she would find it weird. Be like, Oh, could be an old but only because it's like,
[26:13] Mike: you know, she'd be like, Oh, I'm interested in, like, the closeness of it and all this kind of stuff in the fact that that only last 20 seconds would bother. But like, I don't think
[26:21] Mike: I don't think it would be like a major issue, you know? And I think it's a much bigger issue. Probably be like the guy's emotional reaction to it.
[26:22] Keith: Okay,
[26:42] Keith: okay, fine. I think we've accurately litigated this and then, yeah, this is like a somewhat decent Segway into a top we discussed before, but there was that There was a reddit post about this, and it's funny. I found it and then you sent it to me as well. This person says Boyfriend says it's normal to leave me after he's finished s Oh my. This person's a 22 year old female. Uh,
[27:07] Keith: some, uh Wait, hold it. So I've been OK. So I've been dating my boyfriend, who is also a 22 year old male. For two years. We have sex often after he orgasms till either sleep or do something else. I go and satisfy myself on my own. He's not bothered. When I spoke about it today after sex, he says it's not. Yeah, He says it's normal and no boy continues after he orgasms. I don't expect sex right after, but some attention to me in my body.
[27:12] Keith: Um, so we've we've discussed this before.
[27:18] Keith: We've even come up with, like, a term for this, which I don't know if it's unique to us, but yeah, that's that's like post nut clarity. Uh
[27:20] Mike: oh, no. Everybody talks about that
[27:40] Keith: time. Okay, Okay. Let's do that. I thought I thought that maybe you'd coined that. No. No. All right. So, uh, what? I saw this, like, I did the thing that I often do on Reddit, which is I sort by controversial you concert, you consort. The comments by controversial and ah, there wasn't anything good. Like almost everybody's saying,
[27:45] Keith: How can you date him? This guy's terrible above, above blah. Um, and
[27:51] Keith: I suspect that this boy's behavior is not terribly unusual.
[27:51] Keith: Well,
[28:00] Mike: I'm emotionally. I mean, way have talked about this before. It's like it's like this. This falls in the category for me of like getting someone to do things they don't really want to D'oh
[28:23] Mike: right? So there's like, this happens in relationships a lot. It's like, Oh, you know, I want youto come to dinner with my parents so great, like there's sometimes a serious of things like people don't really want to dio and, uh, and like and the truth of the matter is like, Yeah, I mean, like, right after he nuts, The guy does just want to go play video games are going to sleep or go do something else. And I realized that you are
[28:26] Mike: the shiny exception of the guy that wants to cuddle for a couple hours.
[28:37] Keith: Well, I think enjoying cuddling is it's not like I wantto, like have sex immediately right after, right? Like what I definitely don't want to be doing is like, uh,
[28:39] Keith: continuing the sexual. Let me Let me just let
[28:51] Mike: me give me a minute here to represent the other side of you because you may actually not be familiar with this, but like, honestly, for me, right? Right afterward. Cuddling makes me feel gross. Like I feel like,
[29:13] Mike: uh What does it do it like? Makes you feel like some sort of like a loser, like there's, there's there's other stuff I should be doing with my time, like, What am I doing here? And I feel like, sort of possessed possessed in a way, I don't like that. I really don't like Like, I feel like I feel like I'm I've agreed to something that I want to be an independent person. I'm being serious here. Look, I wanna be an independent.
[29:18] Keith: I'm giggling. But like I know you're not simulating This
[29:40] Mike: is like an emotion. There's an emotion that I have, and it's very strong. It's like I don't I like I like like, like, Why have I agreed to this like, this is so embarrassing for me, like I'm not. I'm not an infant. I'm not a little child like I'm an adult. I can I'm quite capable of, you know, facing the world on my own, like, Why am I wide? Why am I doing this? I get all these emotions like that and it's actually kind of hard for me.
[29:43] Mike: I mean, you know, So it's like, so like I have to
[29:49] Mike: yes, annoying It's uncomfortable and annoying, but apparently you don't have those kinds of emotions.
[29:53] Keith: No, I feel, I guess, sort of
[29:59] Keith: bonded to the person and there,
[30:37] Keith: you know? I mean, hopefully this is the case, but, like, yeah, they're they're compulsion to be close to me after that is, I guess, comforting in some way. Like it Come, God, Comfort. I mean, like, I mean, it's completely different. Well, right, Like I have just sort of, you know who are. You know, we've sort of, like, used each other's bodies in this way and instead of, like, is suddenly being repulsed by each other and, like, you know, a little bit embarrassed about what's just happened. We've were We're both sort of, uh into each other in such a way where we, like, sort of still want to be close. And yeah, that could be I don't know, is settling or something.
[30:43] Keith: Yeah, I don't Yeah, it's interesting how, like, get, like, upset on the spectrum. We are in that.
[30:45] Mike: Yeah. I can't understand. Like, I don't know.
[30:49] Mike: I think I can accurately say that I've never felt that way.
[30:52] Mike: Wow. Ever like, it's just not No, I'm just saying right after I know,
[30:56] Keith: you know. I know. I don't know. It's not that like, Yeah, Yeah. Union ship.
[31:19] Mike: No, no, I get this other. It's Yeah, it's sort of lame. Like, yeah, I have a number of sort of stories I could tell, but it's Yeah, it's always sort of the same thing, like it's just a dragon. So I totally understand what this person's doing. The flip side is like, I think that people learn from sort of hard experience like, Look, what's gonna happen is this girl's gonna break up with this guy over this probably, Or she's gonna something. Something lame is gonna happen. Actually, probably the worst thing that probably
[31:27] Mike: probably Instead, she'll just, like, sort of psychologically torture him about it without being without getting to the point. Be much better to just tell him like, Hey, this bothers me.
[31:30] Keith: But I think 22 she doesn't right. We have the tools to do that,
[31:47] Mike: right? So it'll something weird will happen, and he will later learn, like there's this set of behaviors you need that he absolutely must simulate. But it's kind of it's interesting, cause I don't even know what the right answer is there. It's like, because if I was, if I was like you and I want it, let's let's say I was like you and I was with a woman who was like me.
[31:50] Mike: Okay, Yeah. Um and so she wanted
[31:52] Mike: toe leave.
[31:57] Mike: Yeah. I mean, it's like how, actually, how would you feel? It's an interesting question. How would you feel if you were with a woman? And every time
[31:58] Keith: you have haven't you been with
[32:03] Mike: a woman that just wants to get up and leave immediately or is that not happen to you?
[32:06] Mike: Ah,
[32:07] Mike: probably. I think
[32:11] Keith: some women have felt like they're supposed to
[32:17] Keith: leave Erica, you know, like they're like, they're, like, concerned about, you know, being a burden or whatever.
[32:17] Keith: Yeah,
[32:29] Mike: so it may just not happen with women because they don't have the same. So it only happened like, I guess you have to be a gay guy, and then it's so this is a realistic, but yeah. I mean, like, how would you feel? Would you like, would you be able to, like, sort of
[32:32] Mike: just deal with it, be like, Oh, well, this is just how it is for my partner
[32:38] Keith: I think I would be. Yeah. And it's not like, Yeah, I I
[32:42] Keith: I don't think I would feel, like, empty inside or whatever, like, I mean, if they
[32:53] Keith: that I mean, they're sort of like another question here is like, Yeah, like, if you're dating somebody and you really care about them And then every time after sex, they immediately, like peace out. But yeah, like, I think I could feel used. And
[32:54] Keith: even
[32:56] Mike: if you like, That sort of bothers me, though, because you
[33:13] Keith: let me finish my thought here, all right? I could feel used to not really cared for, but if, like, in the rest of the relationship, like, everything was normal. And that was just, like a thing that that, you know, like if they like, you felt like they sort of wanted physical distance. I kind of I don't think that would really bother me that much.
[33:14] Keith: Okay.
[33:14] Keith: Yeah, I
[33:17] Mike: think it bothers women a lot, so I don't know, but obviously,
[33:19] Keith: I think that's because
[33:32] Keith: oftentimes, like, more often, they are being used in, like, that kind of behavior where they're just sort of like, Yeah, I'm I'm done. I'm leaving the room. I'm going to go do something is sort of, like, indicative of a larger thing where they don't really care for them.
[33:33] Keith: Yeah,
[33:46] Keith: well, yeah, I mean, it's like it's possible to, you know, ah, one physical distance after sex, but, like, you know, be reasonable in all other facets of the relationship. But I would say they are non correlative, anti correlated.
[33:52] Mike: Yeah, well, this reminds me a little bit of that. There's another topic on your list here for today about, uh
[34:05] Mike: ah, the semen on the tongue. Oh, yeah. And shall we well know? Hang on. I want to say something about it. Well, I mean, you could bring up the topic first, but the point is that, like, why don't you bring up the topic? Then I'll say when I say it'll be marking
[34:21] Keith: textural. All right, So this person, the title is showing come before swelling it, they go on. I love to come in my girlfriend's mouth. It feels so great, but this is not very visual. I sometimes ask for, not swallow immediately, but hold it in and show it before swallowing. There's a return for this kind
[34:27] Keith: and little bit of kinky act. If not, I think it needs one smiley face that seems to be quite popular, important to
[34:39] Mike: okay, saying on So So I actually don't like this important. We get that. We can discuss that in a second. The thing I wanted to say that because I I was thinking about this the other day is that, like
[34:52] Mike: I reflect sometimes maybe when watching porn or whatever on the fact that like when the guy's Nutting, which is an important part of porn, right when you're masturbating, you probably you probably I I know this because PORNHUB has that little
[35:05] Mike: meter of people there, people listening. You don't use pornhub like there's this little meter at the bottom that shows you the frequency with which people watch each say Second of the porn so you can see what part of the porn is watching was actually kind of a clever innovation.
[35:13] Keith: This it really is, You know, when they change scenes because there's sort of a spike. There are like right when penetration starts because there's a spot, a spike there and then there's always a like at the nut,
[35:33] Mike: right and there's right. That's the point is there's a spiker on the nut. And so it's like, Well, why're guys watching that? If it's obvious, right? I mean, they're watching that because, you know, that's what they're headed for, guys like that. But it always also occurs to me the lake. You know, it's the not particularly saying in a woman's mouth. It's like one of the
[35:41] Mike: situations in life where two people are experiencing something in a totally different way, like fundamentally different way, right? Like the guy is having this like,
[35:45] Mike: you know, dopamine release or whatever it is in your brain
[36:02] Mike: that caused you to have the orgasm. And the woman is basically having a flesh tube squirt. Some like funky stuff in her mouth. Yes, like 5 to 10 times and, like those are fundamentally different experiences, right? And so it's like it's like her experiences, just like, oh, squirt, squirt, squirt
[36:08] Mike: on. And I think about that with regard to the the come on the tongue or whatever. Now it's like, Oh, now after
[36:13] Mike: play, this role of like, the guy has these weird things. He wants to have happen.
[36:16] Keith: Hold on. So look.
[36:17] Keith: Okay. Okay, fine. You want to finish your thought fun.
[36:21] Mike: Yeah, it just reminds me of it. Reminds me of
[36:25] Mike: this situation in the previous topic about, um,
[36:51] Mike: you know how they fund the city Experience is just so fundamentally different, right? It's like the, you know, right afterward. The guy wants Thio get away and the woman wants to cuddle, and then right at the moment of orgasm, it's like, What's going on? The guys like, Oh, this is the greatest thing ever in the woman's like, Yeah, I mean, you just squirted Cem piss water in my mouth like that. And And also, the other thing is for the guy. I'm sure you have this experience for the guy. Like when you not it feels like this really powerful thing.
[36:58] Mike: But like if you just look it, it's not it's it's not a powerful thing. It's like this little bit of seeming anyway. Now you go.
[37:04] Keith: It is Yes. It could be a bit a bit pathetic looking okay, but all right, listen. All right, So
[37:31] Keith: one of the reasons why I find blowjobs so strange is that like, yeah, like that moment where I'm coming feels like Yeah, this gets very difficult to believe. They're They're enjoying that very much. However, I've been told over and over again that I should get over that I should understand that, like, they're, you know, they're enjoying giving me the pleasure. Um, okay, So if given that, like, what's the difference between, um,
[37:36] Keith: you know, making a little show of it after after I come?
[37:37] Keith: Well, the problem
[37:44] Mike: I have with that is that, like, you mean, it just gets back to the same thing is like, now you're asking for a show during your post, not clarity.
[37:52] Mike: So it's like, Well, like, I totally don't understand why God wants to see that. It's like you're you actually are now not aroused anymore. And so it's like,
[37:55] Mike: so, yeah, the way I interpret this and,
[37:56] Mike: you know, look,
[38:06] Mike: maybe I'm just misunderstanding it, but the way I interpret it is one of those things where they're trying in the porn to prove that it's riel, that the guy didn't fake the orgasm.
[38:20] Mike: Um, And by the way, by the way, when you say that you like to cuddle, it occurred to me at the moment when you said earlier that, like, maybe you're not actually having orgasms. I mean, we could be equal opportunity here on throwing shade on male and female orgasms. Maybe.
[38:27] Mike: Maybe you're not having real orgasms because you you don't get that. You don't get sufficient post not clarity.
[38:36] Mike: Anyway, I think in the porn, they're trying to show that it really happened. But maybe I don't know. Do you do in in real life or important? Enjoy that.
[38:41] Mike: Enjoy. What? What's that? Having your having the man or your
[38:43] Mike: nut shown to you on a tongue afterward?
[38:46] Keith: No, I don't think so.
[38:50] Keith: I don't want no, no, I'm not super interested in, like
[39:11] Keith: anything about my semen, especially. Well, I mean, I guess the only time is right after right after producing it. Uh, yeah, it's not it yet. No, It's like the opposite of compelling like it's it's It's a pain to deal with. You have to. It's kind of it's there, but But I'm not I'm not.
[39:29] Keith: It doesn't make it any any more interesting to see it, I think, like, yeah, I mean, So what do you think is going on with these people that, like, want to see it on their tongue, like like, is it? Are they trying to like maximally demean them. Are they trying to, like, comfort themselves that the girl like, really, really, really wanted it? Like what? What's going on there?
[39:36] Mike: Well, I like I said, I have always assumed in porn that that was just this was just like a cum shot. It was like the thing like, where they pull out or whatever they say. It should
[39:45] Keith: be a little device to demonstrate that the guy that the guy that the guy came Okay, fine. But like, what's going on in actual deployment?
[39:52] Mike: Yeah, I know that's hard for me. It's really deeply difficult for me to understand, because I would say, Well, but your arousal lt's gone.
[39:58] Mike: And I mean so I guess it would be some sort like submission thing. Like, Oh, look at you. You have to
[40:01] Mike: do this thing, then pretend to like it.
[40:07] Keith: Yeah, I I think it's something around coddling the man's eagle ego.
[40:21] Mike: Maybe. I mean, the biggest is the big issue I have with it is that the guys no longer aroused when he's consuming the the visual content. It's like, Well, what could possibly be compelling about this?
[40:22] Mike: Yeah,
[40:24] Mike: so, yeah, I'm sort of it's It's Ah,
[40:31] Mike: I've sort of lost on it. And I cannot imagine that women like doing that.
[40:33] Mike: Blankets? Yeah, they would rather die.
[40:40] Keith: I can't imagine that. They like doing a lot of things in and around Blowjob. So? So I'm not, like, confused about that part. I know
[40:42] Mike: what you should be confused about. That because
[40:48] Keith: it really worse than than something other aspects, like, Yeah, it was worse than like, having someone come in your mouth
[40:54] Mike: because, well, that because Because tthe e the coming in your mouth thing, uh,
[40:55] Keith: I know what you're gonna say, but go home. Go
[40:56] Mike: ahead. What do you say it for me?
[41:04] Keith: Okay, you're going to say they like that part because it's like explicitly delivering physical pleasure.
[41:04] Keith: Yeah,
[41:18] Mike: it's like they're in there. They're connected in this very like, direct way. I mean, I still think it's odd because it's like the way they're directly connected is actually not very direct. I mean, they're just feeling like some squeezing of muscles and some fluid,
[41:25] Mike: so it's all kind of odd, but like the, uh but yeah, I mean, like, there's some connection going on there,
[41:39] Mike: You know? Where is after afterward. It's like nobody's enjoying themselves. Yeah, that's that's kind of mean, and suddenly it's kind of funny. It's like a little humor sketch like nobody's enjoying themselves. The girl doesn't want to have it on your tongue, and the guy should not be enjoying it, either, because he's not aroused anymore.
[41:45] Keith: I mean, do you think this guy's lying when he says that, he wants to see his come displayed to him before she swallows it?
[41:57] Mike: I have to be honest. I do sort of thing. He's lying a little bit like it's like like I see, like, I think he may be lying to himself. He's like, Come up with He's like, decided he likes that. But it's like, Well, how and why. I mean, like,
[42:09] Keith: Okay, I think we both agree that it would be hard for it to be like, sexually stimulating, but yeah, I mean, maybe it's mentally or emotionally stimulating in some way where yeah, he likes the demeaning aspect of it he likes Uh huh,
[42:13] Keith: simulating, really wanting it or something or you
[42:14] Mike: don't mean that,
[42:22] Mike: and that sensibly around is stimulating is like if you got a blow and right after he had, like, hander something terrible to eat,
[42:24] Mike: unrelated like you just you just does something to meaning,
[42:33] Keith: right? You just slaps her knowing you continue to do it knowing chores for me to show me how much you care for my physical pleasure. Yeah, I don't know. Man from
[42:34] Keith: Yeah,
[42:36] Keith: Okay. All right. Let's
[42:43] Keith: Yeah, we're talking a lot about, like, timing here, but all right, little It's an immoral, sexy Let's go. Let's stay with it. Okay, so this person says,
[43:07] Keith: Ah, this is written by female. Any ladies feel bad when they take too long to come? Even if what your partner is doing feels good, enjoy the sensation of having my clit licked. After about 5 to 8 minutes, I start feeling bad for my boyfriend because I still have not orgasms. And I don't want it to turn into a chore for him are usually suggest switching to sex so he won't get bored. In the past, he has commented that it takes a long time for me to get off.
[43:23] Keith: That's that's that's That's a relevant comment there, ladies, how long does it take for you to orgasm from cunning, cunning Lingus men Be honest. Does it become a chore for you if she takes too long? How many minutes are you able to go down on her before? It's not fun for you anymore. And you lose your erection.
[43:38] Mike: There's a lot of messed up, so I mean, like, way at first question is like, Do you maintain a full erection the entire time while giving oral to a woman? Not usually, no. Yes, it's so right there. Like their shows. Like a somewhat lack of understanding of male
[43:41] Mike: anatomy or behavior. It's a little weird.
[43:47] Mike: Um, but I mean, what what What do you think about what's what's the answer for you? What's the after how many minutes do you?
[43:51] Keith: Yeah. I mean, I think this is actually pretty interesting question. Like, uh,
[44:01] Keith: yeah, like how long is appropriate to hope that somebody will go down on you for And how long is? Uh, yeah, like
[44:10] Keith: how long after, which would would I start to feel feel badly if they if they were still down there? Um
[44:12] Keith: I don't know. I I did this for sure.
[44:29] Keith: I did date somebody who I think I told you about this person who, like, would have me go down on her basically indefinitely, and I think like the first,
[44:50] Keith: Like, I think there were, like, numerous encounters whereby I went down on her for what seemed like more than half an hour like on. I think it might have been more than 45 minutes. I think one time I don't remember exactly. I think maybe I've been drinking a little bit and wasn't completely paying attention. But I think there was a time where, like I was, I was down there for, like, you know, 50 minutes or something. 50
[44:54] Mike: Well, what way? What's happening during this time? I mean it is it
[45:00] Keith: you're looking? Just I'm going to say some things here that you're going to contest, but yeah.
[45:02] Keith: No,
[45:19] Keith: no, it's not. Not me. She gave me feedback. So to avoid you saying the thing that I know you're going to say, she told me that she was having multiple orgasms and up and indeed appeared. Thio appeared to be doing so
[45:24] Mike: for 50 minutes. How many on it? Like how many? Like we're talking like dozens or like to
[45:31] Keith: I don't remember not well is something in between two and dozens, but the but much closer to
[45:34] Keith: know that's believable. I mean, let's say you know, three or four or something.
[45:46] Mike: Okay? No, it's when the people, like, claimed dozens that I start wondering where all that that hormone comes from in their brains, Like Howard. How are they producing so much pleasure? And, uh, yeah, like I don't I don't think I have that much hormone available to go on.
[45:58] Keith: You know, like I mean, you could say, like, your usual things. Like, you know, she could be faking it to, like, Otto my ego. Why would she want me to be down there for so long? Like I remember, I remember one of the times. Um,
[45:59] Keith: yeah. Like
[46:18] Keith: I, uh I often have facial hair on my face. This giving oddly specific here, but yeah, uh, and yeah, like, yeah, she liked it, but, uh, yeah, you know, like my facial hair was was like, uh, you know, like like, like, chafing her a little bit. Um, And so
[46:20] Keith: Ah,
[46:25] Keith: yeah, she would she want to take, like, a brief break, and then and then And then you started. Get back to it. But
[46:29] Mike: I mean, like, what are you What are you What's going through your head? It's a minute 37 of
[46:31] Keith: that's all. Like I thought it was pretty rude.
[46:32] Keith: If I'm being honest,
[46:34] Mike: you actually started getting angry.
[46:43] Keith: I mean, it was fine and that, like, it's fun toe like, you know, impart pleasure to somebody on, like, you know, So like, my ego felt sort of
[47:10] Keith: coddled in that lake, you know, she seemed to be enjoying it like she, you know, she claimed to be having already. Look, let me just say and then we could We could debate this if you like, but I think we'll be boring. She was having orgasms on dso you know, that all was fun, but like, yeah, I mean, there is, like, ah, physical aspect, right? Like it's you know, unless you get in like a special position, like, you know, your neck gets sore in your mouth and you're telling of these kinds of things. Um
[47:12] Keith: and,
[47:21] Keith: um also and that I don't know if you'll like this If you don't like sometimes if you eat like too much candy, you'll get, like, elongated taste. Bud
[47:24] Mike: Uh, yeah. You're like tongue starts to hurt in some spots, you
[47:33] Keith: get, like, a little sore on your tongue. I think it's called an elongated taste, but, um okay, Yeah. Anyway, yeah, that happened, Um,
[47:36] Keith: like, the next day or whatever. Ah,
[47:45] Keith: so that was That was a little bit annoying, but like in the moment, like, yeah, like there's there's like a Yeah, like, you know, probably my neck and whatever. We're a bit sore. So
[47:52] Mike: would sort of end. This is what would end the experience. Did you have to end it or would you? You know what? What? She kind of call it a day. At some point, I
[48:01] Keith: was thinking about this as I was, like, recounting this episode. So I think this happened two different times. We didn't stay together that long. Um
[48:03] Keith: ah,
[48:07] Keith: I don't remember. I don't remember. I think we had
[48:09] Keith: sex after,
[48:11] Keith: um
[48:17] Keith: but I don't remember how the transition ultimately occurred because
[48:26] Keith: yeah, I think I had to do something. I remember thinking like, Oh, my God. Like I wonder if this would ever end Like
[48:35] Keith: like, you know, like, if I don't like, you know, uh, demonstrate some agency here like I wonder if she would let me do this forever. Well, do you think it's
[48:37] Mike: possible to like she was thinking the same thing?
[48:41] Mike: I don't feel like a failure of communication possible.
[48:45] Mike: So, like, I don't want to Like, I don't want to go hard on the orgasm thing, but like Esso, because because
[48:51] Keith: they take really, really enjoying the 1st 20 minutes. But then, like after that, she didn't know exactly what to say. Like she
[48:55] Keith: like most band at that point. Or like all right, fuck this like, let's go.
[49:01] Keith: But yeah, like I was being like to giving you It's possible. Possible?
[49:17] Mike: Yeah. I mean, it's it's ah, like you think that at some point it would just become uncomfortable. But I it gets, like, sort of sort of seems possible that that that could go on and yeah, I mean, if you were with her for two short of a period of time, you never actually had, like, some sort of day new mall of the
[49:20] Keith: todo over patients.
[49:26] Keith: We didn't have the community yet. We were not close enough for comfortable enough with each other to sort of deaf,
[49:46] Mike: discovered like over drinks be like. So what's up with the hour long world that you write? And she probably would have said, I don't like what she would have said back to you. What's up with you wanting like, Yes, she's probably right now telling her friend somewhere about how Ah, yeah. I was once with this guy. He just wanted to be down there for an hour straight, and I didn't know what to do. I did not a
[50:04] Keith: stop it. Yeah, I was chafed all over the place, and it was all Yeah, Yeah, Who knows? You might be right. Yeah. We were like a blind in Mexican standoff. Where? Yeah, Nobody was, you know, strong enough to say something. Okay. Yeah. So that's the high end, right? Like that's that's too long. Right? But like what is?
[50:09] Keith: Yeah. Look, at what point do you think like a normal woman should start?
[50:30] Keith: I mean, there's a couple different things, right? So, like, maybe they're not enjoying it, right? So, like, let's say a guy goes down on you, and you know, he's not very talented in that arena. Ah, How long should you like? Give him a chance to figure it out. Like I think the correct answer is here. Well, you should start giving him some feedback. But, like, you know, a lot of people, especially in early sexual encounters, air
[50:32] Keith: too passive to do that.
[50:42] Keith: And then, uh, if you are enjoying it, Ah, but maybe not enough to drive you to to completion.
[50:45] Keith: Yeah, like how long?
[50:49] Keith: How long should you let him let him let him do it?
[50:52] Mike: Yeah, well, I mean, I think that yeah, I mean,
[50:57] Mike: I mean, there's probably, like, some typical there of, like, five minutes or something, like some,
[51:04] Mike: you know, like, Oh, this feels nice, But it's not going to get the job done. And also, like, I think that sometimes, depending on,
[51:11] Mike: like, hormonal cycles or something, the woman just doesn't It's just not gonna happen Or she's not that interested. Although
[51:14] Keith: I don't know what the beginning of of the encounter.
[51:14] Keith: That's
[51:16] Mike: probably true. I mean, I
[51:19] Keith: you know, the moon is right and whatever Well, I have
[51:29] Mike: been made to know I've been informed by multiple times by women that that's not like so Yeah. So my general impression,
[51:34] Mike: my prior on this has been the like, Oh, yeah, like there are times when a woman just isn't going to come.
[51:35] Mike: But ah,
[51:46] Mike: apparently that's not really right. I think that if a vibrator gets involved, that women pretty much always can, which is one of the reasons why they suggest vibrators for women. Who or not I have never had one,
[51:48] Keith: right?
[51:51] Keith: Well, yeah. Okay. So,
[51:57] Keith: Well, what it comes down to is not always able to orgasm for partner Tax, of course.
[52:00] Mike: Well, yeah, but it just comes down to this thing of, ah
[52:01] Mike: of like,
[52:04] Mike: assuming the woman is capable of that. There's a point
[52:22] Mike: pretty quickly where she's like, Oh, yeah, it's not gonna happen And the like, she has a few options. She could use her hand, but maybe she doesn't want to or doesn't care. I just don't think like, yeah, like, I think that, like, some percentage of the time, the woman is horny and wants to, and some percent of the time, the woman is just, like, basically accommodating the usually hire male sex drive.
[52:26] Mike: And so it just depends on what's going on there and, like, I think you know,
[52:31] Mike: honestly, I think that some percentage of the time. A significant percentage of the time the woman views
[52:41] Mike: is like letting you perform oral sex on her because she assumes that it's arousing you. I'm sure you've had that experience where if you think back on it, you probably is. You're in a situation. Sure,
[52:45] Mike: which is interesting, because I think from my perspective,
[52:54] Mike: maybe you don't agree with this. But I think most guys like if the woman just basically was upfront right at the beginning, that counter the guy would choose not to.
[52:57] Mike: Yeah, if if he knew, it wasn't going anywhere.
[53:05] Keith: It depends. It depends. But yes, I did. I mean, yeah, we can argue about whether with you what the percentages are there, but it's not zero. It's not 100. Well,
[53:16] Mike: I just think that, like most of what's arousing, there is the notion that it's working for her. And if she's just like, it's not gonna work for me today, I think the guy would be like, Well, fine, I'm not like I don't like, I don't have this, like urge to just, like lick a
[53:18] Mike: part. You know, what if
[53:21] Mike: like this totally unresponsive thing like who cares, right?
[53:22] Keith: Yes,
[53:26] Keith: No, I agree, But but yeah, Yeah
[53:27] Keith: yet,
[53:29] Keith: I guess,
[53:37] Keith: Yeah, if I know that she's completely un aroused by it, that I Yeah, I like I don't want to do it. It's almost, like, embarrassing, right? But
[53:45] Keith: if I know she's not gonna orgasm, but she kind of likes it like I still like it. Yeah, it's like a compelling thing, too,
[53:48] Keith: to do otherwise. Yeah, I know it's a little complicated,
[53:49] Keith: Um, but I
[53:58] Mike: think it's only compelling in so far as she is. It's like it's like you because you're I think it's the only compelling and so far is like you're naturally
[54:20] Mike: attracted to arousing a woman because and I think that that is attractive to men because female arousal is somewhat unusual. Like in porn, I would argue importance virtually non existent. And so it's like a commodity. Female arousal is like a commodity. That's sort of hard to come by for guys, which is exactly the opposite women. Obviously, male arousal is extremely easy to come by, like
[54:22] Mike: perhaps too easy. Yeah,
[54:43] Keith: perhaps, uh, yeah. Okay. So, gosh, I mean, yeah, I mean, we're not I don't think there's actually a right answer here. like. Okay, let's say you're a woman. Okay, let me up. Let me give, like, specific, specific serum, and then you give me a number of minutes or seconds, All right? You are a woman. You are. You know, you are not going to come. It feels kind of good.
[54:44] Keith: Um,
[54:50] Keith: but you're not going to come like how long should you let him hang out down there?
[55:05] Keith: And you? I mean, I think consider your own pleasure. Like at some point, I guess it's gonna get a bit boring and butt, And then you also have to consider his ego. So, like, if, like so, for example, if he goes down there, he's there for 10 seconds. And you're like, OK, I'm good. That, like, that's almost like
[55:08] Keith: you're gonna hurt its feelings.
[55:14] Mike: Well, yeah, but I mean that Well, do you've added another wrinkle that I think the answers as short as possible. And,
[55:28] Mike: you know, the ideal obviously would be like communicate. So the guy knows why. It's not like an ego problem, I guess. If you are not alike, let's assume for this hypothetical that you're not allowed to talk or have any other communication.
[55:31] Mike: E I mean, it's probably like
[55:39] Mike: 3 to 5 minutes or something. Like, there's probably some mean in there. That's like, Oh, you gave it a shot. That feels right.
[55:45] Mike: I mean, letting, letting it happen. I mean, have you ever had a woman lets you be down there for, like, 30 minutes, And and she doesn't?
[55:46] Mike: I haven't
[55:48] Keith: No, no, they'll be kind
[55:54] Mike: of amusing, actually. Idea. That would be a nice trick for a woman. He kind of funny. Almost. There
[56:00] Mike: were just Just, like, not like she's just like she just, you know, Uh,
[56:03] Mike: yeah, you could imagine like a dominatrix doing that.
[56:05] Keith: Yeah, you could. You could
[56:14] Keith: Ah. Okay. Uh, let's see her, aren't we? I think we have time for one more topic here. Sure. Yeah. Ah, let's see here.
[56:23] Keith: This one. Sort of weird. This one sort of. This is I don't know around some of the other things we talked about, so it stays like vaguely topical.
[56:27] Keith: Um, this person says, what does it feel like to get noted in
[56:30] Keith: And, uh, that's it. That's all they say. Uh, that
[56:34] Mike: question is posted, by the way, Uh, frequently on this.
[56:50] Keith: Yeah, I think often by men. Yeah, I mean, this This this one? Hell, yeah. 47,000 up votes and read. It has all these, like, various awards you can give now, and yeah, I mean, look, this is, like, the frickin parasite of awards. Like they want everything. Okay,
[57:00] Keith: the first comment, sort of funny. This guy says, I just asked my girlfriend and she said, Honestly, I don't feel when you're not You're not. Isn't that powerful from the guy goes on. That's gonna be my suicide note
[57:04] Keith: was sort of amusing. Um,
[57:08] Keith: but yeah, I mean, I think generally Well, what do you think about this?
[57:13] Mike: Well, I mean, it's a trope in porn that women will pretend to feel it
[57:22] Mike: like in, you know. But, like, I think that look, people can fool themselves. Uh, you know, But I you know, I mean, like, people can.
[57:31] Mike: People could decide that things were going in that aren't really, But I I'm pretty confident that if you did some sort of, like a study involving, like, I don't if you know, these things exist, it's
[57:33] Mike: let me just,
[57:34] Mike: uh,
[57:39] Mike: doing aside here for a second, like there are these dildo devices that exist that Ah,
[57:48] Mike: have, like a little reservoir of semen in them. Are you aware of? No. Yeah, it's it's And there's a particularly revolting thing. It looked,
[58:01] Mike: I guess revolting is too strong because I mean this On some level, women do when they do oral sex, but, like, where they on chatter bait. I've seen where Cam girls will actually take one of these things and, like, empty it into their
[58:10] Mike: down their throat. Okay, which is sort of that sort of okay, But then, like I've seen it where they have a much larger bladder of fake semen
[58:11] Mike: that
[58:13] Keith: what is it he did it out of?
[58:15] Keith: I don't care. Hi. That in the store,
[58:22] Mike: I'm sure it's just like flour and water or something. But like the notion of, like, civil have this, like, enormous amount of it that they, you know, the
[58:26] Mike: be good. A deep throat ing will put this thing down their throat and then they'll just
[58:26] Mike: let fly.
[58:34] Keith: I just quickly google this. Yeah, how to make fake calm, how to make fake come become recipe. How to make fixing. Jesus. Okay, Sorry. Continue.
[58:46] Mike: So anyway, so that's That's like a whole thing that we could we could discuss maybe at some point, but like, I don't know, obviously there men that are aroused by like, Well, it's like you cocky or some like this enormous Monica. My guess it goes back to the come on the tongue thing like,
[58:49] Mike: um but yeah, like, uh,
[58:51] Mike: there's,
[58:53] Mike: um,
[59:01] Mike: like it's a you know, basically, like I think that if you did an experiment with one of those things and
[59:03] Mike: didn't like there was no other
[59:13] Mike: sign to the woman of what was going on, it was just like a reservoir being pushed out through a dildo. I don't think there's any way that I think the vast majority would not feel it,
[59:19] Mike: even if the dildo sort of like pulsated in the way a Penis what I just I just think it's highly unlikely that
[59:27] Keith: they think the comments were sort of corroborate that, like some of them are funny. Somebody says sometimes it feels suddenly warmer and liquidy and there, but most of time I can't tell.
[59:28] Keith: Um,
[59:30] Keith: this person talks about
[59:36] Keith: what it feels like immediately after it feels like giving birth to a small jellyfish made of panic and disappointment
[59:48] Keith: amusing. Another person. Sometimes you can't really feel it. Other times you feel the pulsing and wetness slash warmth, question mark. Which sort of implies that yeah, like I think what they're Yeah, they
[59:58] Keith: Sometimes the man will make noises or sort of, like, stiffen up in a way that, like they know what's happening, and so they're probably almost like imagining a feeling down there. But
[59:59] Keith: that's what I'm saying. Yeah, I
[60:01] Mike: think that goes on a lot.
[60:07] Mike: Um, and you know, I mean, like, it goes, This goes back. It really is really related to the topic about
[60:29] Mike: the post, not clarity. It's like it's like you have this situation where, like, two people have fundamentally different experiences, and the experience and the feelings they have are so strong that it's hard to believe that this person, right next he was having a totally different experience. So guys like, Well, wait a minute. You can't feel that, like, crazy feeling I have. When my nut shoots out, shoots out, guys like to call it shooting. Where is the girl would be like, it's just squirting. It's like this time anyway.
[60:39] Mike: And and similarly right afterward, the woman like probably feels super bond into the guy. Just like you don't feel this like love and all this emotion. And the guy's like Now I just want to go, like, play basketball
[60:48] Mike: or would even, you know, just get that I want to go. I want to go be out in the desert by myself, whatever the guy feels. Everybody except you,
[60:57] Mike: Um, not everybody. Many, many men have this feeling, and it's interesting that, like two people that in this situation have such fundamentally different feelings.
[61:11] Mike: And I think that's why I like that, gets at the root of white guys. Look, the real reason guys ask this question because they're beating off and they wanna have. They want chicks to write something hot for them. Yes, And of course, notable is the fact that when this question is raised,
[61:18] Mike: the fast majority of the women who reply say they don't feel it. So it's like they're basically bursting the guy's bubble. And yet, and yet
[61:27] Mike: on the flip side, like guys, we're supposed to just pretend like in post that clarity there super attracted to the girl. So it's like this. There's a little bit uneven field there, huh?
[61:35] Keith: Yeah. I wonder if you asked. I mean, look, we spend a lot of time on the sex Subreddit and, like, thinking of discussing this kind of stuff. Yeah, I bet the average man
[61:42] Keith: if you asked him, You know, if he hasn't like the thought or read about a bunch about this, if you asked him like whether they
[61:46] Keith: can feel that their intuition would be Yes.
[61:46] Keith: Yeah,
[61:59] Mike: because Because it's it's It's almost everything in life. If you feel something, the person literally adjacent to you is also feeling like, Did you feel that earthquake? Did you feel you know, whatever the car stopped?
[62:05] Mike: And it's unusual to have something that you feel so strongly they don't But it's Yeah, it's purely a psychological event. Yeah, I
[62:15] Keith: mean, look, if you go that, like, I've looked through the 1st 6 comments here, like, here's another one I've never been able to tell. Other than that, he says he's going to come his body language, facial expressions, or all three
[62:35] Keith: afterwards. If he keeps going, it's just much wetter and squelch here like they can feel the semen. Sure, I'd of them right, Like some of them said. Like, Yeah, it feels like a period after because it just rips out right, Like that's that makes sense. But yeah, it's amazing that they can't feel the the actual twitching of the orgasm. Yeah, it's just much less powerful than men think. Which is,
[62:41] Mike: That's right. It's like it's It's like having a small tube escorting
[62:46] Mike: a small amount of fluid somewhere. It's just not a big deal. And you can approve this to yourself
[62:54] Mike: if you want by, uh, by videotaping your Penis while you ejaculate, which I've done, and it's very unimpressive.
[62:55] Mike: I deleted it, right?
[62:59] Keith: I never done that yet. No idea. It would be sort of interesting, too.
[63:07] Keith: I have, like some aversion to seeing myself do that kind of kinds of things. I don't know if it's like shame or embarrassment or like some sort of like
[63:17] Mike: when you can just video that part of your body. It doesn't have to be about me, and then you can immediately deleted. But I was sort of curious. I did this. Ah, while that because I was sort of curious. I just wanted to see if, like
[63:33] Mike: like I was like, what does does like the head get bigger. Does anything happening? Like honestly, nothing happens. It's like nothing. Nothing. Nothing in this stuff squirts out right. It's like the lamest thing possible. You're like, Oh, and I mean, to be fair. Like, I could have seen that just important. But I wanted to do more of a controlled study. I
[63:39] Keith: think it's interesting, too. Like, yeah, see things about your own self that you don't normally see.
[63:40] Keith: That's
[63:45] Mike: the thing is when it's happening, you can't really study it. Yeah, So I didn't. I said I looked at it for a few times, and I don't
[63:55] Keith: like I mean, there's other things in that arena. Like, you know, you can sort of stand over a mirror and see, like, you know, parts of yourself that you don't normally see. That's sort of strange, but interesting.
[63:56] Keith: Sure. Yeah.
[64:09] Keith: Um, okay. Refa, there s O. All right. So that'll do it for upset. 15 of your mileage may vary a cz reminder. You can contact us at why, mm, ipod at gmail dot com or on our Facebook page.
[64:25] Keith: Ah, we've been eager for some more feedback. Into that end, we're going to offer $10 to the first Let's say the 1st 50 folks who email us. Ah, show feedback at you can You can email us at why? Mm. The pod at gmail dot com.
[64:30] Keith: Please tell us how many episodes you've listened to and put a bit of consideration. And your comments We appreciate it
[64:36] Mike: has to be like a paragraph. We do have more money than sense here, but you can't just be nothing.
[64:45] Keith: Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And you know what? We'll Venmo or PayPal or whatever you say, How you'd like to be paid, paid in the mail. And you know what will do that? As a CZ?