Your Mileage May Vary: Bisexual Partners, Nashville Bachelorettes, Being Filmed, Penises Getting Longer, Anilingus

Episode Transcript

Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.

[00:00:01] Mike: Hello and welcome to Your Mileage May Vary. We discuss sex and relationships in a way that is with frankness, that is often controversial, but mostly in good faith. My name is Mike. I'm here with Ali today because Keith is still in South Africa, apparently near in the u Cape Town area. Ali, how are you doing today?
[00:00:20] Ally: I'm great I'm in the California area.
[00:00:23] Mike: Okay, so we're both in California now. I recently came back from a trip to go to a wedding I'm not going to exactly say where it was because it was not somebody who would listen to the podcast, but, uh, you never know. Uh, so I was somewhere in the Midwest and one of the places I went in was Nashville, but I actually want to ask you a couple of things about this wedding I experienced first. Um, so this is a person who has been dating somebody. It's a female person that I know a woman. She's been dating somebody for four years, approximately.
[00:00:55] Mike: And I know I've known her a really long time a friend. She's in her mid 20s. And when they started dating, she was ah in college or just out of college and it was an athlete in college. So very good shape, like very attractive young woman.
[00:01:15] Mike: And at the wedding, she has gradually gained weight. They live in the Midwest.
[00:01:17] Ally: Mmhmm. Mmhmm.
[00:01:18] Mike: All right. They live in the Midwest. So that's relevant, I think, because the Midwest has this kind of one of the key areas of obesity in the United States. And at this point, so the the the groom is i I would guess still around the same weight he was four years ago.
[00:01:33] Mike: He's around her age. She is now I'm going to guess like 350 pounds.
[00:01:38] Ally: Oh my god.
[00:01:39] Mike: Something like I'm just guessing. but But we don't we don't have to talk about these people in particular. I'm i'm curious about the situation here.
[00:01:44] Ally: Yeah.
[00:01:45] Mike: as a woman.
[00:01:46] Ally: How much do you think she weighed when she was an athlete? Like, was she a wrestler? Like, what kind of athlete?
[00:01:50] Mike: I don't want to get too specific. so But let's just say let's just say a distance.
[00:01:53] Ally: Okay.
[00:01:56] Mike: ah Distance ah
[00:01:59] Ally: So she was slim, you're saying. Like, she wasn't.
[00:02:01] Mike: Yeah, she was muscular and slim.
[00:02:02] Ally: Okay.
[00:02:03] Mike: Yeah. So I'm going to guess she was, she's probably five five and she was probably 130 pounds. Let's just guess.
[00:02:10] Ally: okay
[00:02:11] Mike: Okay. And now she is at least double that. And he experienced this change throughout the blossoming of the relationship. What would your thought process be as a woman going into the marriage?
[00:02:22] Mike: Like, would you be worried about this if you were marrying? Was this something you would discuss with your partner? Like, how would you? I can tell you what a guy would think, but I'd like to hear sort of the unvarnished female take first.
[00:02:31] Ally: Okay. Yeah, I mean, first of all, I'd be worried for myself. So like, I don't understand why, I mean, There are GLP-1 drugs that you can get through online pharmacies, not even having to lie.
[00:02:45] Ally: And if you're that heavy, you wouldn't have to lie.
[00:02:48] Mike: So this is like Osembic and yeah, yeah okay.
[00:02:50] Ally: Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, I mean, why would anyone get to that weight? Like I understand, you know, you're 20 pounds overweight or something. You're like, oh, I'm gonna lose this through willpower or something. But if you're a hundred pounds overweight, I mean, just get the drug.
[00:03:02] Mike: Okay.
[00:03:02] Ally: They haven't found any negative side effects from it around years.
[00:03:07] Mike: Not yet. Although I heard a podcast, I heard a podcast about Fin Fin from the eighties or whenever it was that like ultimately had a bunch of, I forget what it did. It like did brain damage or something. This was like a previous weight loss wonder drug that you might be familiar with.
[00:03:21] Ally: Yeah, I don't think it was brain damage. It might have been like heart damage.
[00:03:25] Mike: Oh, you're right. No, it was, you're right. It was hard.
[00:03:27] Ally: well
[00:03:27] Mike: It was heart damage. You messed up your heart valves.
[00:03:27] Ally: ah Yeah, but you know, you don't have to be on it forever.
[00:03:29] Mike: That's right.
[00:03:31] Ally: Like if you start to have side effects. Anyway, um so yeah, I'd be worried for my own health if I were her and like now that there's this sort of miracle pill, you know, why not take it? Because you're saying like,
[00:03:41] Mike: It's not a pill, right? You have to inject it into your ass, I believe.
[00:03:45] Ally: Yeah, there are injections. There's an oral version that I think they're not giving to like non-diabetics yet, but okay, yeah, like a miracle injection.
[00:03:50] Mike: Okay.
[00:03:54] Ally: But you're saying like, would I be worried about the relationship? I mean, yeah,
[00:03:57] Mike: Yes.
[00:04:01] Ally: I'd be worried that apparently my, you know, fiance or husband or whatever, like, doesn't care about my health enough to mention it to me, you know?
[00:04:11] Mike: Oh, OK, let's know they might have talked discussed it. We don't know this because I was just I only have the experience of being at the wedding and knowing kind of to some extent these people. But it might have been mentioned, but wouldn't you be?
[00:04:27] Mike: I mean, it's sort of a glaring thing at the wedding, right? I mean, people are like, wouldn't you be worried that people are?
[00:04:30] Ally: People are coming who haven't seen her since college and like...
[00:04:34] Mike: Well, but it's also just an incongruity between the groom and the the bride, right? I mean, it's like, wow, this is me not this we may not go the distance because it is now.
[00:04:42] Ally: Oh, I see.
[00:04:45] Ally: It's a mixed weight marriage.
[00:04:48] Mike: And and when you find out like how long they've been together and stuff, it's like, oh, this this is sounding troubling.
[00:04:54] Ally: Yeah. But, you know, presumably he's, you know, he's seen it happen. And if they're still having sex and haven't had a serious conversation about it, you know, I guess he's okay with it.
[00:05:07] Ally: So on the one hand, it might make you think maybe they're pretty strong in their relationship. But i yeah I mean, I would worry that he hadn't brought it up because I've definitely had conversations with partners where it's like, oh, you know, I feel like I'm getting fat.
[00:05:15] Mike: I don't. so Right.
[00:05:20] Ally: Like, let's eat healthier. Let's not. go out to bars as much. Let's like go running more like that. And I think that's a healthy conversation to have or like a nice conversation to have.
[00:05:29] Mike: Normal.
[00:05:33] Ally: It's like, you know, I care about my health.
[00:05:34] Mike: Okay.
[00:05:36] Ally: I care about your health. Let's help each other kind of thing.
[00:05:38] Mike: Yeah, I don't think there could have been any guys at the wedding who were looking at this going, how how like what's happening here? Like the it's yeah it's confusing and it just seems like very likely that unless it's a the problem is rectified that the guy is going to just not he's going to know about it.
[00:05:48] Ally: Yeah.
[00:05:56] Mike: I sort of wondered if he, you know,
[00:05:58] Ally: for years though I mean, do you think he's responsible for it? Do you think he somehow has him going to fetish and he's like giving her bad foods and, you know, encouraging it?
[00:06:08] Mike: I'll tell you this, that given the state of affairs in the United States right now, if if you're a man with a fat woman fetish, like an obese woman, this must be a Shangri-La. Must just be so great.
[00:06:19] Mike: you know
[00:06:19] Ally: Well, yeah.
[00:06:21] Mike: There's unlimited supply and there's no problems. Right.
[00:06:25] Ally: Yeah, good for them.
[00:06:27] Mike: that may Yeah, maybe i I considered that. I considered that maybe maybe that was what was going on. I thought like maybe he sort of feels trapped in the situation and can't they can't communicate about it. But I think the vast, vast majority of guys would not be excited about that situation because yeah for the obvious reason. It's just like there's the health side and then just like this is kind of gross.
[00:06:48] Ally: Yeah. And I know I was talking to you, I think, about another friend of yours who you felt like was trapped in his relationship. Or no, no, sorry, that was somebody else. Like, how How common do you think that is or how likely is it that a man would feel so trapped in his relationship that he goes all the way to getting married to someone who he has serious reservations about or who he doesn't find attractive?
[00:07:13] Ally: I mean, couldn't a guy just kind of create problems in a relationship to force it to end, even if he doesn't want to directly come out and say like, hey, we should break up. Can't he just like do enough annoying shit?
[00:07:24] Mike: It seems possible.
[00:07:25] Ally: that Yeah.
[00:07:26] Mike: i I thought there was a possibility that he would ah he would like not show up for the wedding. or ah
[00:07:32] Ally: Well, that's really drastic. I could imagine somebody feeling the social pressure to not stand someone up. But I think like before it gets to that point, like you're engaged. You're realizing, like oh, I don't want to do this.
[00:07:41] Mike: Yeah.
[00:07:41] Ally: You could do a lot of stuff to you know force a breakup, I think.
[00:07:46] Mike: Maybe she gained like half of the weight right in the lead up to the wedding. I'm not actually sure about that. I'm not sure what the but the details are.
[00:07:53] Ally: OK.
[00:07:54] Mike: um Okay, but you so as a woman, if you were attending this wedding, like a man, you would be looking at this going, oh, this is something strange is going on. You're like something potentially concerning is happening here.
[00:08:05] Ally: Knowing that it was such a drastic weight gain, yeah.
[00:08:08] Mike: Yes, yeah.
[00:08:09] Ally: If you told me like she'd been like, you know, overweight in college and now she's obese, I'd be like, well, that makes sense. And like, you know, he doesn't mind, but yeah, getting a hundred pounds in four years is like a lot.
[00:08:17] Mike: Right. Right. Yeah, this is. This was drastic and and confusing, and i yeah, well we'll see what happens, but it's. It seems risky for the the continuation of the relationship. OK, so.
[00:08:35] Ally: We wish you could have like betting markets on your friends, relationships, or marriages.
[00:08:40] Mike: I I don't I don't.
[00:08:40] Ally: like
[00:08:43] Mike: Let's see. I'm not sure I would have done that well because I had one in particular that I went to that a lot of us thought wasn't going to last and it has lasted so far. So it's tricky.
[00:08:53] Ally: You could set it up in some way such that like, the longer the couple stays together, you know, they get some dividend from the bets that have failed, right?
[00:08:53] Mike: ah yeah
[00:09:01] Mike: It's true.
[00:09:01] Ally: Or they
[00:09:03] Mike: There are betting markets for losing weight, by the way, like where you can basically not a betting market, but where you can basically make a bet and you win money if you lose the way you're betting that you'll lose. There's some company that sponsors these things.
[00:09:15] Mike: So similarly, you could have something like that for marriage. Uh, maybe, maybe JD Vance would ah sponsor it given his, his stated desire for people just to to stay married and have lots of kids and not be cat ladies.
[00:09:27] Ally: Yeah.
[00:09:27] Mike: You're, you're a cat lady, right?
[00:09:29] Ally: I am, yeah.
[00:09:30] Mike: Right. Did you find a defensive when JD Vance?
[00:09:31] Ally: I'm a childless cat lady. No, I mean, I don't find it offensive because I think it's a great state of being. And I think that he's jealous.
[00:09:38] Mike: Okay.
[00:09:39] Ally: I read his memoir.
[00:09:40] Mike: You think he's jealous?
[00:09:42] Ally: Yeah.
[00:09:42] Mike: Okay. Yeah.
[00:09:43] Ally: So I read his memoir and it's very, it's contradictory and it's kind of confusing um because he identifies a lot of problems in his life that stem from his relatives and parents and authority figures and so on kind of having relationships that didn't work out but being trapped in them because of having kids or in some cases like his mom and his mom's mom, his grandma like had kids really young. Like I think his grandma got pregnant at 13 or something.
[00:10:14] Ally: and His mom got pregnant at 16 and then you know had to get married, had to have the kid and so on. And he identifies that in the memoir as causing a lot of the problems that he's identifying in his community and in his life and family.
[00:10:26] Ally: And then he's coming out on the campaign trail and saying people should essentially you know be forced to have children and should be forced to get married and stay married. And it's like, but in the memoir, he points that out as a problem.
[00:10:37] Mike: you you view You view the pro-life position as forcing people to have children.
[00:10:38] Ally: So I don't know.
[00:10:42] Ally: Yeah. I think a 13-year-old having a kid is being forced in some you know by someone, think first by whoever impregnated her and then you know by the the system.
[00:10:54] Mike: Right. This is because a 13 year old cannot consent to sex, of course.
[00:10:57] Ally: Yeah, I think 13 is too young.
[00:10:58] Mike: And so she's.
[00:10:59] Ally: I'm going to go on record and say I think 13 is too young.
[00:11:05] Mike: It makes sense. I wonder, yeah, I wonder what the typical age of the the guy, the the father, so to speak, in those situations is probably substantially older than 13. That's almost certainly the case.
[00:11:16] Ally: Yeah, I mean, I forget in the memoir. In the memoir, I think it was, you know, that maybe the father was like 16 or 17 or something, but like still. ah Yeah, yeah.
[00:11:24] Mike: He can run away. He's not stuck with the the child.
[00:11:29] Mike: Right. Right. But you would also favor. yeah Well, I mean, I guess the she could always just leave the child, like lose the kid accidentally.
[00:11:38] Ally: Yeah.
[00:11:38] Mike: Leave it in a bathroom or.
[00:11:40] Ally: also Throw it into a crevasse somewhere. Yeah, I mean.
[00:11:44] Mike: Not throw it.
[00:11:45] Ally: so
[00:11:45] Mike: I mean, don't know, don't be crass. It wouldn't be it would just be an accident.
[00:11:48] Ally: ah
[00:11:49] Mike: yeah
[00:11:49] Ally: yeah
[00:11:49] Mike: yeah If that doesn't happen very often, I guess people don't want to kill their infants, typically. Well, maybe they do do it and you just don't.
[00:11:59] Mike: I mean, there is SIDS, c SIDS, which might well be, you know.
[00:12:02] Ally: Yeah, I mean, now they have that thing where you can leave a baby in like the fire station box and you don't have to leave any like identifying information.
[00:12:08] Mike: Right.
[00:12:10] Ally: So I guess.
[00:12:11] Mike: Of course, there's genetics, so they'll find you eventually.
[00:12:14] Ally: Yeah, yeah, that's kind of thrown a wrench into that whole abandon your kid at the fire station.
[00:12:20] Mike: Right. Well, speaking of middle America ah and and weddings, one thing that I so we did a little ah we went to this wedding in the Midwest and did a little road tripping from there and ah wound up in Nashville, Nashville, I learned is pronounced Nashville.
[00:12:37] Ally: and
[00:12:39] Mike: ah And Nashville, apparently, the downtown on Friday and Saturday nights, and really every night of the week, but particularly Friday and Saturday nights, is just inundated with bachelorette parties. And I found an article about this from 2017, so this is not a new phenomenon. Talking about a woman named Nicole, ah who's got a penis-shaped whistle hanging around her neck. She blows the whistle.
[00:13:07] Mike: dances sort of seductively. I don't want to read the whole thing. It's got various phallic instruments and it's sort of dancing around in the street. They're screaming woo all the time. And we noticed this in on Broadway Street in Nashville. You have these bachelorette parties, these large groups of not kind of scantily clad, attractive young women kind of dancing around and partying.
[00:13:31] Mike: what What is your understanding of why they're there?
[00:13:34] Ally: Uh
[00:13:34] Mike: what what's why why are they Why are they doing that? Why do they all want to be in the same place with a bunch of other bachelorette parties?
[00:13:41] Ally: huh.
[00:13:42] Mike: Why are they dressing scantily? They're with other women. like What's going on there? What's the but the appeal? Have you done this?
[00:13:49] Ally: no
[00:13:50] Mike: Okay.
[00:13:50] Ally: No, of the bachelorette parties I've been to, one, we got a big like Airbnb in Tahoe and like went wine tasting and hung out in the hot tub.
[00:14:02] Mike: Did you have a pillow fight and fuck or?
[00:14:02] Ally: um No, we watched Mama Mia.
[00:14:05] Mike: You didn't. There was no there was.
[00:14:08] Ally: It was pretty wholesome. um And then one was another like kind of wine tasting, you know,
[00:14:10] Mike: Did you like.
[00:14:14] Ally: if somebody rented a big bus and we like drove around, I don't think even think we stayed overnight. um
[00:14:20] Mike: So in either of these, did you compare breasts, vulvas?
[00:14:23] Ally: No, and it was kind of just us, although, I mean, I'm sure that Napa gets its fair share of bachelorette parties also. So in terms of like, why do they all go to the same place, I think, you know, mimesis or whatever you would call it, like you hear about a lot of bachelorette parties happening in a place and you have to plan a bachelorette party and you're like, oh, why don't I plan it at the bachelorette party place?
[00:14:32] Mike: Right.
[00:14:41] Ally: Like that makes sense to me.
[00:14:41] Mike: Okay. So at these bachelor parties you you went to, were you scantily clad? Was that the expected attire? No.
[00:14:48] Ally: No.
[00:14:49] Mike: Okay. So it's not, in your experience, I mean, can you put your mind in the body of one of these young women to understand like what, what are the, cause I mean, normally in my mind, women do this to attract the attention of men.
[00:14:49] Ally: No.
[00:15:01] Mike: There are men in in in Nashville as well.
[00:15:01] Ally: Right.
[00:15:03] Mike: It's not just women.
[00:15:04] Ally: Yeah.
[00:15:04] Mike: And i I was mentally thinking that there probably are men who live in this downtown Nashville area, very attractive men who just have sex with these Bachelorette party women who get drunk.
[00:15:15] Mike: Kind of, I mean, a lot of them are very drunk.
[00:15:16] Ally: and
[00:15:18] Mike: It's probably hard for them to keep track of each other. theres Probably certain ones, when when a woman's drunk and she's at someone else's Bachelorette party, maybe she gets kind of, she she thinks, oh, I'm going to meet someone. Could you imagine that happened?
[00:15:28] Ally: Yeah, I mean, one thing you have to consider is like of the bachelorette party, probably some proportion of those girls are single. So they're probably really glad for the same reason that anyone would be Nashville in my experience.
[00:15:35] Mike: There you go.
[00:15:39] Ally: So i I went to New Orleans recently and I went to Nashville two years ago, I guess.
[00:15:43] Mike: Okay.
[00:15:43] Ally: ah in neither case for bachoy parties. But both of them seem like places where they have kind of one big street that's kind of blocked off to cars and that just has like a ton of bars. And it's just set up to be kind of a little you know corral for drinking. And Nashville seemed a lot cleaner and safer than New Orleans. So it makes sense why more parties would end up and new in um in Nashville. but
[00:16:10] Mike: And is the is the motivation just to be looked at? I mean, do they want some do they want to get a dick in them? Is that like, would is that a good? was it Would that be a positive or a negative or neutral for a woman who's who's single and is one of these attendees at a bachelorette party if she end up having sex with a guy there?
[00:16:27] Ally: it pens I I could imagine it being positive.
[00:16:29] Mike: It depends, OK? It would definitely be it would necessarily be a one night stand, right?
[00:16:37] Ally: I don't know how close these people lived in that.
[00:16:39] Mike: ah
[00:16:40] Ally: I think there's
[00:16:41] Mike: Okay. Okay. I mean, for a guy, like that kind of thing would be a a necessary positive. I mean, it would definitely be a clear positive, but for the woman, I didn't. It's a little confusing to me what their motivations might be, but that. that
[00:16:52] Ally: probably some element of competition in a group of women where like if you're the only one who got male attention to that extent, maybe you'd be a little bit proud of it in the sense of like, you know, out of this group of 12, like I was the one who was single.
[00:17:10] Mike: Do you think so? I mean, i would would but would the optimal thing be to get a bunch of male attention, but then turn all the guys down? Or would the optimal thing actually be to suck a dick?
[00:17:21] Mike: I'm thinking it's the former, okay?
[00:17:21] Ally: I think it depends how attractive the guys are.
[00:17:24] Mike: I'm interesting, interesting. So if a guy is sufficiently attractive, his dick goes up in value.
[00:17:28] Ally: Yeah. Yeah, you don't want an ugly dick.
[00:17:29] Mike: and that in that situation Is that true? I mean, because normally, well, but the dick is always around the same look, right?
[00:17:40] Ally: Yeah, but.
[00:17:41] Mike: there are There are men that are sufficiently attractive that you you start fantasizing about wanting to suck their cock.
[00:17:46] Ally: yeah yeah
[00:17:48] Mike: What's that like in your mind? Like you you you imagine the ridges on the bottom of their cock against your tongue and stuff like that? Like what happens in your mind?
[00:17:57] Ally: I think it's just part of being you know being physically attracted to someone that you would imagine like making out with them and then more, I guess.
[00:18:02] Mike: Okay.
[00:18:08] Mike: Okay.
[00:18:10] Ally: um but yeah And I would assume that this would fit in with your kind of worldview of how women view sex.
[00:18:10] Mike: Okay.
[00:18:18] Ally: But like if you view sex as something like kind of like a prize that you're bestowing on someone, like you don't want to bestow it on an ugly or undeserving person. but you would bestow it on a very attractive person as kind of like an indication that you see and value their attractiveness and the effort that they put into it.
[00:18:30] Mike: If.
[00:18:36] Mike: OK, in that, well, you know, their attractiveness is mostly genetic, though, right? It's not going to I guess maybe if they've weight lifted or something, they might have.
[00:18:43] Ally: yeah
[00:18:43] Mike: OK, but the does the fact that the guy that makes you salivate in this way and desire to. give him oral, probably like all the other women have the same view and the fact that he can service all these, you know, it's not a problem for a guy to service all these women. That doesn't play a role in your thought in in the thought process. They're like, that you're not actually special. Like he.
[00:19:08] Ally: would I think if it's a guy who's hitting on everyone in the group, that would be seen as more like funny and you know he wouldn't you wouldn't want to make out with that guy.
[00:19:14] Mike: Okay.
[00:19:18] Ally: It would have to be a guy who seems to have singled out you.
[00:19:21] Mike: Okay, so the trick for a guy would be to be really attractive. Don't be unattractive.
[00:19:26] Ally: roll up not
[00:19:27] Mike: And then and then cleverly pick out each Bachelorette party group and single one of them out. Maybe maybe not the most attractive one too, I'm guessing.
[00:19:32] Ally: Yes.
[00:19:35] Mike: Maybe like a medium attractive one because that way it's not, it's not, oh, you're always singling out Marcia.
[00:19:37] Ally: Yeah.
[00:19:40] Mike: It's like, you're going for that.
[00:19:42] Ally: Right.
[00:19:42] Mike: Okay, so that way she'll feel special and then he bangs then he bangs or gets the blow and then,
[00:19:45] Ally: and
[00:19:48] Mike: Well, I guess he's probably done for the night, but he could then the next night do the same thing to a group.
[00:19:52] Ally: Yeah, or, you know, there's like 20 bars on this one street, he could go to the next bar, find a different group.
[00:19:58] Mike: Let's say after that one night stand like that, just the way that life worked, you somehow found out how many one night stands the guy had had in his life. And you found out that like his number was like eight thousand. Would that bother you? know Would you be like, oh,
[00:20:15] Ally: feel like
[00:20:16] Mike: Like, let's say that, let's say like, let's say after, after you manage accoladed, like after manage accoladed, there was some number that would show up on their, their penis or something.
[00:20:17] Ally: yes yeah
[00:20:23] Mike: And you saw an enormous number. Would that matter? Or would you just be like, Oh, well, yeah, that makes sense.
[00:20:29] Ally: I mean, i'd I'd be quicker to get tested the next day.
[00:20:33] Mike: But you wouldn't feel like you wouldn't feel like you'd been snookered or something.
[00:20:39] Ally: No, if it's yeah if it's a one night stand, you need to depart.
[00:20:40] Mike: Okay.
[00:20:43] Ally: I mean, this is the kind of trap or like the you know the calculus that goes in the wrong direction for getting picked up at a bar to begin with, which is that like if you're the woman and you're assuming like I'm going to go to a bar and a man is going to approach me and pick me up, like you're overwhelmingly more likely to be approached and picked up by a guy who's kind of a fuck boy, like a guy who who does this a lot to a lot of women, right?
[00:20:58] Mike: Okay.
[00:21:07] Ally: Just because he's going to be more practiced at it and he's more eager, you know he approaches you right away and so on and so on. You know, as a woman, you're in this kind of bad situation where you know that the guys who are approaching you are not the kind of guys you want to meet.
[00:21:23] Ally: But then if you are seen to be like turning down a lot of guys, that's also going to be a negative signal to the kind of guy who's shy and more uncertain. And so then if he sees that he's even less likely to approach you.
[00:21:36] Ally: And so there's.
[00:21:38] Mike: This is really interesting. So what is that what what do you think is the optimal strategy for a woman? you do you want you want to avoid It sounds like you want to avoid the fuck boy, but you also don't want to have to approach guys yourself, or is that is that the right strategy?
[00:21:49] Ally: Right.
[00:21:50] Mike: So what do you do?
[00:21:53] Ally: I don't know.
[00:21:53] Mike: Maybe you don't know.
[00:21:53] Ally: I mean, I haven't figured this out. I don't know.
[00:21:56] Mike: Okay.
[00:21:57] Ally: What should one do?
[00:21:58] Mike: So you there's that that's interesting. I mean, well, men, because we because figuring out how to pick up women is like a standard, thing topic of discussion among men, but i had not i've not I think men naturally assume that women basically just show up at the bar and just sit there, that they don't have a strategy.
[00:22:15] Ally: Yeah.
[00:22:15] Mike: And you're saying that there is, like you actually will sit there thinking, like what should I do to get that good dick?
[00:22:20] Ally: Yeah, I mean, one strategy is probably don't try to be too attractive because the worst ah guys are going to go after, you know, the most attractive women. So you want to be like kind of in the middle. But then if, as you're saying, if the guy thinks that he has a better shot going after the sort of less attractive woman because he thinks that she's approached less,
[00:22:43] Mike: yes
[00:22:43] Ally: you know, then you're in this kind of competitive race condition. What do you think the strategy should be if you want to meet a guy who, you know, doesn't pick up women all the time that this is just his neighborhood bar.
[00:22:49] Mike: Yes.
[00:22:56] Ally: He's like recently single and trying it out for the first time. So he's probably like a little bit shy and unaccustomed to this. Like what should the woman's strategy be to show that he's open to that guy?
[00:23:04] Mike: Really difficult.
[00:23:06] Ally: like
[00:23:06] Mike: I mean, my my first past thought is that women just shouldn't try to meet guys at bars because I think that the men's strategies are very practiced.
[00:23:11] Ally: Hmm.
[00:23:14] Mike: And I think that women I think that women will naturally gravitate. and Women do naturally gravitate toward like the top five percent attractiveness guys who are the fucking boys. So I think women I guess what I'm saying is I think women broadly are terrible at this and it's very hard.
[00:23:23] Ally: Yeah.
[00:23:26] Ally: the no right
[00:23:27] Mike: I think it'd be very hard to be good at it. Uh, yeah, I'm not, but if, yeah, like if a woman had to go to a bar and try to like meet a reasonable guy, it's probably similar to the strategy a guy would use.
[00:23:39] Mike: Like you don't, you, yeah, you reject the fuck boy guys that, that approach you and you try to approach. Well, see this thing, you're not allowed to approach anyone, right? So you're like, you're not nothing nothing good is going to happen because the guys that aren't used to it to working are not going to approach you.
[00:23:53] Mike: So you'll just, they're alone.
[00:23:53] Ally: Yeah, and if you approach them, they'll be like confused and put off.
[00:23:57] Mike: No, I don't think that's necessarily true. That actually is not right. I think if you approached guys, they would be they would welcome that because then it takes the pressure off them. Of course, the woman then has to face the possibility of rejection, which women are not as accustomed to as men. ah But yeah, that but yeah i mean approaching guys is probably like a reasonable reasonable strategy. um but the But the thing about it, it's ah it's a fraught situation because men are definitely going to say whatever they think they need to say to ejaculate in or near you.
[00:24:25] Ally: Yeah.
[00:24:26] Mike: So.
[00:24:26] Ally: Do you think this condition only applies to bars or it app approaches it applies to any place where one might get approached like a cafe or a yoga class or something?
[00:24:34] Mike: I think that ah when you think that, well, I mean, this is why, well, they actually, OK, I think that I think this is why doing something that involves an activity is a better move for people generally, like like something where there's like something going on. So there's a reason why you would repeatedly go to this place other other than just trying to have sex.
[00:24:52] Mike: And so then you can observe and communicate with the person in a kind of like, in a repeated way that doesn't have the sexual pressure behind it.
[00:24:58] Ally: Yeah.
[00:24:59] Mike: And so cafe and bar would not be that it would be something like yoga classes closer, um something that is a shared interest.
[00:25:04] Ally: okay
[00:25:06] Mike: um But to be fair, like, ah my general thought on this is that and this was another thing that I thought with the Bachelorette parties is I actually was under the impression that people didn't really try to meet each other in person like this anyway, because of dating apps.
[00:25:18] Mike: So basically among this 25 year old cohort, like, so, so then it made it even more curious that you have these women. I guess it's just some sort of weird adult Disneyland. These women are parading around and these like seductive and the seductive attire, but actually have no interest in meeting anybody at all because they're just meeting people on Tinder.
[00:25:36] Mike: That was another thought.
[00:25:37] Ally: I think it's been a little bit of a wane in interest in dating apps. Like, um not really like a backlash, but I think that the dating apps now have dipped in popularity and people are more interested again in meeting in person.
[00:25:41] Mike: Okay.
[00:25:50] Mike: I see. I see. So the fuck boys are back on top in some ways.
[00:25:54] Ally: Yeah.
[00:25:55] Mike: Hmm.
[00:25:55] Ally: Although, I mean, the dating apps preference the fuckboys too, because you just get like four pictures and two lines of text. It's biased towards the pictures, you know?
[00:26:03] Mike: That's true. and And as we know, like ah from Keith's exploits, if you pay, you get a lot more data as a guy. so you can then and And you can also pay to get put in front of more people.
[00:26:14] Mike: And there is sort of a statistical advantage you have. If you're put in front of 100,000 people or 10,000 people, you're going to do better than if you're put in front of 50 people.
[00:26:22] Ally: Yeah.
[00:26:24] Mike: um Okay, we should we should move on to this. I've got one more topic.
[00:26:26] Ally: but Did you talk to any of the bachelorette parties? or
[00:26:30] Mike: Uh, let me think about that.
[00:26:30] Ally: and
[00:26:32] Mike: I talked to a bartender about it a little bit, but I did not talk to the but bachelor party people.
[00:26:35] Ally: Okay.
[00:26:37] Mike: they They were too busy ah yelling woo and and ah kind of dancing around.
[00:26:39] Ally: o
[00:26:44] Mike: Yeah, it's extremely loud. like That's the other thing. like it's not It's not conducive at all to any sort of communication.
[00:26:47] Ally: Yeah. Right.
[00:26:51] Mike: it a strange yeah It's a strange environment, ah lots lots of drinking. And like you said, they sort of close off a street for it.
[00:26:56] Ally: Yeah.
[00:26:58] Mike: Okay, so I've got an article here from Stanford, Stanford Medicine.
[00:27:02] Ally: Like it. Okay.
[00:27:04] Mike: And it says, is an increase and increase in penile length cause for concern? According to trends in male reproductive health data, sperm quality and testosterone levels have declined over the last few decades, blah, blah, blah, blah. But there are other changes in men's reproductive health based on 75 studies from 1949 to 2021.
[00:27:23] Ally: oh
[00:27:24] Mike: The team found the average erect penis length increased by 24% over 29 years, a trend seen all around the world. And they have various theories as to why Um, I assume they, yeah, they're talking about penile length. So it's, they they give the specifics. I believe it's grown from 4.9 to something in the fives.
[00:27:43] Ally: Oh yeah, it says 4.8 inches to six inches.
[00:27:45] Mike: Okay. Six inches. There you go.
[00:27:46] Ally: Wow, okay.
[00:27:46] Mike: You found, you found, there's several articles on point here.
[00:27:47] Ally: and
[00:27:49] Mike: Have you noticed this in your exploits with, uh, erect penises?
[00:27:53] Ally: No, but I have not been conducting research over the past 29 years.
[00:27:58] Mike: You also generally deal with small penises. I know this because you have, you told me last time we talked that you had no problem ever getting a penis fully into your mouth when it was erect.
[00:28:05] Ally: No, I did once. There was one guy in college. Very large opinions.
[00:28:11] Mike: Okay. Okay.
[00:28:13] Ally: And he was also the quarterback of a football team.
[00:28:17] Mike: The place where you went to college, we don't need to say it, but the place where you went to college, I didn't even know they had a football team.
[00:28:22] Ally: Right, yeah. Not many people do.
[00:28:24] Mike: Uh, the quarterback of the football team at that college is kind of comical a little bit, but that's, that's good.
[00:28:28] Ally: Yeah.
[00:28:29] Mike: Was, did you, was it a one night stand or did you date for a while?
[00:28:31] Ally: Yeah.
[00:28:32] Mike: You had a one night.
[00:28:32] Ally: It was a one-night stand, but we were in an activity group together, so we were friends before and friends after.
[00:28:33] Mike: stand
[00:28:39] Mike: Did you get an orgasm?
[00:28:41] Ally: No, because his his penis was so big that it couldn't even fit inside me reliably, like it kept slipping out and we were like, this doesn't work.
[00:28:50] Mike: It was slipping out because it was too big. I mean, that doesn't really make sense.
[00:28:52] Ally: Yeah, it was it was too girthy.
[00:28:54] Mike: Shouldn't, but short. It was, it was, it was a short, but okay.
[00:28:58] Ally: No, it was also long.
[00:29:00] Mike: So it just never would go fully in and then it would just sort of like, Oh,
[00:29:02] Ally: I guess, yeah, like on the you know on the backstroke or whatever, like it was the natural contraction or something was to like push it out.
[00:29:13] Mike: ah so if your body thought it was actually birthing a baby repeatedly.
[00:29:16] Ally: think I don't know. My body rejected it.
[00:29:18] Mike: Okay. where did he where did he put it Where did he put his semen?
[00:29:24] Ally: You know, I don't even remember if he came.
[00:29:25] Mike: Oh my goodness, you gotta know these things. You don't know if he came, he definitely came.
[00:29:29] Ally: It was a long time ago.
[00:29:31] Mike: All right.
[00:29:31] Ally: Probably. Did I? I mean, yeah, maybe I went down and I don't remember.
[00:29:38] Mike: Well, you said wait you said that you couldn't fit it all the way in your mouth, so you must have gone down on him.
[00:29:42] Ally: Yeah, and I don't remember if that was like, you know, to warm it up for insertion or it was like after insertion because insertion wasn't working.
[00:29:50] Mike: But yeah it was the one I stand. Why didn't you use a condom?
[00:29:55] Ally: Maybe we did?
[00:29:58] Mike: Have you ever given oral sex to a guy while he's wearing a condom?
[00:30:01] Ally: No.
[00:30:03] Mike: No, so you would have had to not have it on and then put a condom on subsequently.
[00:30:06] Ally: Yeah.
[00:30:07] Mike: Interesting.
[00:30:07] Ally: ye
[00:30:08] Mike: um So you don't you're not you haven't noticed men's penises to get longer.
[00:30:13] Ally: No, it seems like a substantial increase.
[00:30:13] Mike: I would have.
[00:30:15] Ally: I mean, is this just for Americans or is this global?
[00:30:16] Mike: It does.
[00:30:18] Mike: It's worldwide, it's worldwide. i I would have thought they would have effectively gotten shorter because of obesity. um i'm One possibility is just the way it's been measured has changed.
[00:30:30] Ally: yeah
[00:30:32] Mike: ah Although they said they looked at flaccid, stretched and erect length. For those who don't know, stretched is where you have the penis flaccid and you actually like yank on it and how long it is ah without being erect.
[00:30:38] Ally: Yeah.
[00:30:42] Mike: And i I think that's approximately the same as your erect length. It's a little less. um But you can sort of get a sense that yeah of of how long the penis was there and It would be very surprising
[00:30:50] Ally: Yeah, I mean, this article, which is short, says endocrine disrupting chemicals might be responsible. I mean, 29 years is, what, like one and a half generations? I mean, it's really not two generations. so like it's That's too short of a time for it to be. It's kind of like selection for you know longer, penis people are breeding more or something. um So i yeah, I would say it's probably a difference in the way they're measuring.
[00:31:18] Mike: Yeah. Well, it could be, I mean, uh, there is, there are these other effects like lower sperm counts, uh, things relating to environmental pollution, sedentary lifestyles, blah, blah, blah.
[00:31:29] Ally: Yeah. How much taller have people gotten in this time period?
[00:31:33] Mike: Not, not 24%.
[00:31:35] Ally: No, not 24% but like, I mean, does the ah smoking reduce?
[00:31:37] Mike: It could be because people aren't smoking, you know,
[00:31:42] Mike: Smoky makes you shorter. Makes you grow less tall.
[00:31:46] Ally: Okay.
[00:31:47] Mike: ah Well, sorry, that's completely anecdotal. But i my what I've heard is that it makes you grow less tall. I actually don't i don't know the evidence on that.
[00:31:51] Ally: So you think people were smoking like during puberty or whatever and then now they're not?
[00:31:58] Mike: ah Yes.
[00:31:59] Ally: When does your penis stop growing?
[00:32:02] Mike: Well, mine has continued to grow.
[00:32:04] Ally: Well, right, but someone like.
[00:32:06] Mike: I'm a normal guy. I mean, someone like Heath who's down in the in the modest size range.
[00:32:08] Ally: Yeah.
[00:32:10] Ally: Yeah, it has to stop at some point, like, you know, toward the end of puberty, right?
[00:32:11] Mike: ah
[00:32:14] Ally: Like.
[00:32:15] Mike: Yeah, I would guess something like 17, 18 years old, something like that.
[00:32:18] Ally: OK, so were people smoking as like 15 year olds?
[00:32:18] Mike: It's a little hard to say.
[00:32:21] Ally: I mean, maybe, but.
[00:32:22] Mike: Oh, for sure. For sure.
[00:32:24] Ally: In the 80s.
[00:32:25] Mike: Maybe not in the 80s, but now, you know, maybe, I mean, and have you ever watched the the movie Grease? A lot of cigarettes in that. I mean, that's the late 70s, but yeah.
[00:32:31] Ally: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:32:36] Mike: OK, so you don't you don't. have I thought this was interesting. i It was the first time I'd ever seen something suggesting that the people's penises were growing. I would have I would have assumed the opposite because of obesity.
[00:32:50] Mike: So.
[00:32:50] Ally: Yeah, I would also wonder, I mean, data from 75 studies. Yeah, maybe there's some, you know,
[00:33:01] Ally: trend in the way that participants are recruited or something that has generally changed from these studies or in the way that measurements are recorded.
[00:33:11] Mike: That seems likely.
[00:33:12] Ally: Yeah.
[00:33:13] Mike: It'd be fun to think that because then in like 100 years, the average penis would be like 12 or 15 inches long. um
[00:33:19] Ally: Right, because I mean, there hasn't been a 20, as far as I know, there has not been a 24% increase in like the depth of vaginas.
[00:33:29] Mike: I don't think so.
[00:33:30] Ally: Yeah.
[00:33:30] Mike: It would be the other would be less room for that to happen, less. ah It's not clear where the where the the penis would would fit in the female body in that situation.
[00:33:37] Ally: yeah yeah
[00:33:41] Mike: All right, let's ah we got some good topics here. um first This first one actually relates to, I'll bring it up in a second, but this is a person whose new fling, a woman's new, she's 19, he's 22, recorded her while they were intimate without asking first.
[00:33:56] Mike: and She's asking, should she say something? The first time they were intimate, I was turned around. I was turned around.
[00:34:01] Ally: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:34:01] Mike: She means they were in the doggy style position, not facing each other. And she heard his camera turn on. Uh, it wasn't loud, but the house was quiet. And afterwards when I asked him about it, he admitted it immediately. He apologized for not asking after I mentioned it and reassured me that it was just for him.
[00:34:15] Mike: And I want to believe him. My face wasn't in it and I don't mind being recorded, but it bothered me. He didn't ask first. Uh, we ended up getting together a second time and recorded both rounds as well. but he did it on my phone and let me know, but still didn't ask if I wanted him to or if he could.
[00:34:31] Mike: Something, something, something. So have you had this happen with with a partner where they recorded? Like, have you, have you ever, hmm.
[00:34:37] Ally: Well, not as far as I know, but I, she says, we're planning on getting serious pretty soon. I don't think that's going to happen. This sounds like a guy who has a lot of sex.
[00:34:48] Mike: no
[00:34:49] Ally: It's not going to get serious with anyone. um Yeah, I would say this is concerning ah because it seems like something that he has done before and like is practiced at doing and that he immediately has a response to what he assumes will be like her objections to it.
[00:35:04] Mike: Yeah.
[00:35:11] Mike: So you've never seen a video of yourself having sex.
[00:35:15] Ally: No.
[00:35:16] Mike: Have you ever videoed yourself masturbating?
[00:35:19] Ally: Kind of for like you know in in long distance relationships or something like sending.
[00:35:21] Mike: Oh, but never for yourself.
[00:35:25] Ally: No.
[00:35:26] Mike: You're not curious to see what what's going on down there.
[00:35:29] Ally: No, and I think we've talked about this before. like i don't I don't think it would be attractive. It's like taking a video of yourself sneezing or something. You're like, ah why do I want to see this?
[00:35:38] Mike: Oh, OK, OK. We were so we were on this trip when we went to Nashville and these other places. We were in Airbnb's and, you know, it's somewhat like people now talk a lot or reasonably ah often about hidden cameras in Airbnb's. Is this something that you worry about?
[00:35:55] Ally: No, but I'm also you know in In one relationship that I was in, like my partner would always i not yell at me, but you know like I would get undressed or something without caring whether the curtains were closed.
[00:36:06] Mike: OK.
[00:36:06] Ally: And he'd be like, oh, but like what if people see you? And I'm like, I don't care if people see me. like That's their fault.
[00:36:12] Mike: But you would, you would care if your partner like you were in the doggy style position and you found that he was filming.
[00:36:12] Ally: um
[00:36:17] Mike: He's just like, look, I just want to show people my dick going in and out of you that you wouldn't like that.
[00:36:24] Ally: i yeah I wouldn't want him to show other people.
[00:36:29] Mike: Even if your face wasn't in.
[00:36:29] Ally: I wonder why is he showing other people? and like Who is he showing? you know I would assume that like that he's doing that because he has some kind of you know collection of this and is using it as like a trophy.
[00:36:33] Mike: Well, because it's.
[00:36:42] Ally: um I would assume that if he only wants to have sex with me and he wants to do this you know just so that he can have it for later or something, that he would tell me about it.
[00:36:44] Mike: Okay.
[00:36:49] Mike: Uh huh.
[00:36:52] Ally: ah I think the the secretiveness implies that it's more because he sees her or me or whatever as as disposable and is going away soon.
[00:37:03] Ally: So he wants to memorialize it, but like just for him.
[00:37:05] Mike: Oh, you'd be afraid. You'd be afraid of of indicating ah some fragility in your relationship. There wouldn't be like a first order concern of like, look, this is just gross.
[00:37:10] Ally: Yeah.
[00:37:13] Mike: Why are you doing it?
[00:37:15] Ally: No, I think I'm not telling me about it would indicate some kind of fragility.
[00:37:16] Mike: or making
[00:37:21] Mike: Interesting. interesting ah What do you think the odds are? Like try to be as unbiased as you can. What do you think the odds are that there is a video of you fucking on the internet somewhere?
[00:37:30] Ally: Oh, and the internet?
[00:37:32] Mike: or so he' somewhere recorded on someone's hard drive, on a tape, like whatever.
[00:37:34] Ally: Huh.
[00:37:37] Mike: What do you think the odds are?
[00:37:42] Ally: I mean, there's only one person I've dated who I would think might have ah done this.
[00:37:46] Mike: But it could also be in an Airbnb or hotel, like there could have been a hidden recording. like
[00:37:50] Ally: Oh, see, I don't even think they would save the one of me. Like, I don't think I'm that hot. Like, they would be like, oh, I want this.
[00:37:57] Mike: you think they would You think they would throw away the recording of you?
[00:37:59] Ally: Yeah. If they're recording in like an Airbnb or in a hotel room, they must be getting you know one couple a week or something. and like I don't even think in a year's worth of recordings that I would make the top 10% or more, I don't know, yeah.
[00:38:09] Mike: You think, you think it's only one a week. I think that my assumption is that when a, when a couple of stairs in an Airbnb, the odds that they fuck are ah close to a hundred percent, like 90%, assuming they're like under 60 years old.
[00:38:22] Ally: Okay.
[00:38:24] Mike: So, I mean, isn't that what you do when you're with your significant other in an Airbnb or at a hotel somewhere?
[00:38:31] Ally: Pretty often, yeah.
[00:38:31] Mike: Okay.
[00:38:34] Ally: Yeah, I guess so.
[00:38:35] Mike: okay
[00:38:36] Ally: um So yeah, I mean like the odds that, well, of like, I guess, I don't know, I'll say like,
[00:38:45] Ally: maybe there's like a, well, how do I frame these odds? Like do I say like there's a, you know, 20% chance, like 20% of what, I guess?
[00:38:53] Mike: 20% meaning, to like oh, that's a good question. Well, if you had to place a bet, if you had to place a bet, what do you think the odds of the bet would pay off are, right? So you're betting that like there is such a recording, you'd say, well, I think a two and 10.
[00:39:10] Mike: What odds would you require to make the bet or something?
[00:39:11] Ally: Okay, yeah, yeah, I guess like, well, I mean, I do think it's less than that. I just don't think that like, one in 10 or less, yeah.
[00:39:17] Mike: You think it's close to zero.
[00:39:21] Mike: and Interesting. Okay. um And you have no recordings yourself. Otherwise, it would be 10 out of 10.
[00:39:27] Ally: Right, yeah.
[00:39:28] Mike: That yeah, that by its very nature implies 100% because I have my own recording.
[00:39:30] Ally: What do you think are the odds that there's a recording of you having sex
[00:39:35] Ally: Oh, and you put it online.
[00:39:36] Mike: No, no, no, in a private stash. Actually, I think I think I've deleted recordings that I had. So so what
[00:39:44] Ally: What do you think? yeah So what do you think the chances that there's a recording of you online that you don't know about, like that someone.
[00:39:48] Mike: For a man, for a man, it's going to be incredibly low, right? Because nobody's because it's as much as.
[00:39:53] Ally: But it's the same scenario, right? Like how often do you and your wife stay in a hotel or an Airbnb and like you could be in the video.
[00:39:57] Mike: It's true, it's true.
[00:39:59] Ally: like
[00:40:00] Mike: It's true. um I hope that it's I hope it's high because see, unlike you're saying, oh, you don't think they would keep it. I'm hoping they would want to keep the video of me because I would be proud of that.
[00:40:07] Ally: Right.
[00:40:09] Mike: But realistically, it's probably like one percent or something. It's really low.
[00:40:12] Ally: Okay.
[00:40:13] Mike: Yeah.
[00:40:14] Ally: So you also think this scenario of like somebody recording in an Airbnb is very unlikely.
[00:40:19] Mike: That's true, but I would say when we like we were discussing it on this trip and we decided we didn't care, it's like whatever. It just doesn't make any difference. There's so much porn out there that it's not going to matter.
[00:40:27] Ally: Yeah.
[00:40:30] Mike: And to your point, you thought you said you thought they would delete you. Let me tell you, they wouldn't. They would keep all of it because it's not just it's not just like the attractiveness and stuff.
[00:40:37] Ally: Mm
[00:40:39] Mike: It's the transgression of it.
[00:40:41] Ally: -hmm.
[00:40:41] Mike: I think I've told this story on this podcast before. I don't know if you heard it, but when I was in college, ah I was the I was an r RA call it in a dorm. And the dorm had three floors and one of the floors, the third floor didn't go, didn't cover the entire floor. So that way there was an access panel in the third floor where you could get into kind of the crawl space. There's a but very big crawl space, kind of an old dorm, an attic really above two of the wings of the dorm. And I learned right at the end of my time as an RA that I had a key to that crawl space. I had no idea.
[00:41:15] Mike: So I opened it up just out of curiosity, like what's, what's in here. And I went through the door and right above the women's shower on one of these wings, there was a makeshift, but clearly with like five to six, something like that spaces seating area above a vent that angled down just properly.
[00:41:33] Mike: So you could watch women showering in there.
[00:41:34] Ally: Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Okay.
[00:41:36] Mike: Uh, and I thought like, so this is real. I'm not making this up. And I saw it and I was like, holy shit. I never told anyone. I just left it closed. I didn't use it.
[00:41:43] Ally: Yeah.
[00:41:43] Mike: Um, but like, I've got to think that these things exist all over the place and it's the transgression of it. Like guys love the idea that, you know, you could be beating off while watching the woman showering or whatever.
[00:41:49] Ally: Yeah.
[00:41:52] Mike: And she doesn't know you're there.
[00:41:53] Ally: Don't you think you could have gotten some money from the college if you had reported it and made a big stink about it?
[00:42:00] Mike: I think there's, I think, I think it's more likely they would accuse me of something, right?
[00:42:07] Ally: Maybe.
[00:42:07] Mike: Like, I mean, it was at the end of the year, uh, I couldn't prove that I wasn't the one. I can't prove even as I sit here now that I wasn't the one using it. So, uh, I just know it existed.
[00:42:15] Ally: Right.
[00:42:18] Mike: I know exactly where it was probably still there.
[00:42:20] Ally: Yeah.
[00:42:20] Mike: Look, maybe it was the maintenance people. I mean, that's likely actually.
[00:42:24] Ally: Yeah.
[00:42:24] Mike: What a great, maybe I should see if I can still get in there. Oh, sorry.
[00:42:28] Ally: I think you should see if you can still like you know accuse the maintenance people of doing that. There would definitely be a lawsuit.
[00:42:33] Mike: I have to think that.
[00:42:33] Ally: like There's no way that you wouldn't get a settlement out of this.
[00:42:36] Mike: I have to think that women's showers in universities are just crawling with camera hidden cameras and stuff. Have you thought about this before? Like just women's locker rooms, bathrooms, showers, these things. I mean, you could, ah I was investigating this because i um my kid told me some stuff.
[00:42:51] Mike: This was a couple of years ago about what was happening in school and I wasn't sure.
[00:42:52] Ally: Hmm.
[00:42:54] Mike: And it was nothing bad, but I just didn't believe him, like in terms of like how the teachers behave, because I think school has changed a lot since I was in middle school and high school, since you were as well.
[00:42:58] Ally: Hmm.
[00:43:04] Mike: And so I was like, you know, there's, there's a lot of misbehavior that's tolerated now by other students that I, and I was like, Oh, and so I had started looking for hidden cameras. That's the point. I was like, what can I give him that then I can see this stuff and then COVID COVID happened.
[00:43:15] Mike: Actually it all became moot, but there are amazingly small cameras that you can put places that have very small batteries.
[00:43:16] Ally: Oh yeah.
[00:43:22] Mike: And like, I, yeah, I mean, I don't see, there's really just nothing. and And the other thing is you could place them all over the place and they can record hours and hours and hours on something the size of your fingernail.
[00:43:34] Mike: And if, and it let's say that somebody notices it, who cares?
[00:43:38] Ally: Yeah.
[00:43:38] Mike: There's no way to track it back to you. And then you just go back in there and grab it if it is. And you, you know, whatever you could cover your face when you're, gro you could even pay, you could definitely get it. There's probably a way to get the data, retrieve the data wirelessly.
[00:43:48] Ally: yeah
[00:43:50] Mike: So you never even have to go back in there. um So yeah, i think I think the reality is that, ah so actually maybe that should increase the odds that you've been filmed somewhere naked. We were saying having sex, but because these these cameras are probably everywhere.
[00:44:05] Mike: you Probably your best bet, frankly, is just to post a video of yourself fucking.
[00:44:09] Ally: Yeah. Right. Just get ahead of it.
[00:44:11] Mike: Right?
[00:44:11] Ally: Yeah.
[00:44:12] Mike: Yeah.
[00:44:12] Ally: Um, everywhere I lived in college, all the dorms I lived in had co-ed Um, halls or whatever, you know, so like all the bathrooms and stuff were co-ed. And so, um, you would have single, you know, shower stalls, but like, you wouldn't be guaranteed to be filming a woman.
[00:44:28] Ally: Like you'd be filming an equal number of men and women. I don't know if that changes the odds of.
[00:44:32] Mike: So the showers, hours were co-ed, meaning that your stall might, you might be, and the stall next to you might be a dude.
[00:44:39] Ally: yeah
[00:44:41] Mike: But I mean, guys do jack off in the shower. That didn't occur. Like, is that, you don't care. Didn't care at the time. He was like, all right.
[00:44:48] Ally: Oh, no, I don't care about that. I'm just saying, like whoever is filming it is then going to have to go through and, like I guess, edit out all of the guys that they've found now filmed showering. Or, I guess, you know get audiences.
[00:44:58] Mike: But I'm saying in college, in college, like there was no problems with that. There were no problems with male masturbatory behavior disrupting the female showering experience.
[00:45:07] Ally: No.
[00:45:08] Mike: It's somewhat surprising to me.
[00:45:10] Ally: I think there were only two showers. Well, one of the dorms I stayed in, there was like Yeah, I think there was one shower stall and the other dorm, there would be like two shower stalls that you could enter in the bathroom and maybe there would be another person showering, but no, there wasn't any problem with that.
[00:45:28] Ally: One time there was a shower shitter and that was a problem, but I didn't ever actually see it.
[00:45:32] Mike: No.
[00:45:35] Ally: It was just something that on the dorm listserv, you know, people were complaining about and like, I assume that was a man, but who knows?
[00:45:39] Mike: Surprising surprised me.
[00:45:43] Mike: I don't know. Surprising that my my ah my college has had that problem as well. But of course, it was it was me. I would shower shit.
[00:45:51] Ally: yeah There were suggestions to you know DNA test the shower ship, but that never happened.
[00:45:59] Mike: Would that even work? I guess it would. There's enough.
[00:46:00] Ally: It would, but you'd have to then test everyone who lives in the dorm and privacy concerns.
[00:46:05] Mike: Okay. All right, let's get on to another topic here. So I consider myself a very masculine guy. I'm six foot eight, a power lifter. Yet, yet the second my bisexuality becomes known, all sexual attraction is lost. Everything can be going great. But when it comes out that I'm bi, I so often get from women that I'm seeing that I'm just not attracted to bi men. Sorry. Have you have you had this happen? Have you had a guy come out as bi at any point during a relationship?
[00:46:34] Ally: Um, yeah.
[00:46:35] Mike: And even if not, what would you do? I mean, like we hear this so often that like, yeah, I mean, there's a real, frankly, there is a real taboo against bisexual men.
[00:46:45] Ally: There was one guy in college who tried to hook up with me like he was a friend of mine. And I knew that he Well, he thought he was bi. I thought he was gay. So I didn't hook up with him because I was like, no, dude, you're gay.
[00:47:00] Mike: Do you think that bi men,
[00:47:00] Ally: I'm denying his own lived experience. Cancel me for that.
[00:47:04] Mike: Do you think that bi men even really exist or do you think they're all pretty much just gay?
[00:47:04] Ally: um
[00:47:10] Mike: I think they're all pretty much gay, personally.
[00:47:11] Ally: it's a tough It's a tough question. Yeah, they probably do exist. um
[00:47:21] Ally: would I want? You know, I don't feel threatened or jealous about the idea of my partner having sex with another man. I only feel threatened or jealous about the idea of him having sex with another woman.
[00:47:33] Ally: So theoretically, I should be all for this. But yeah, I think.
[00:47:37] Mike: Really? This is because the threat that you would feel is emotional.
[00:47:43] Mike: Like, let's say you were.
[00:47:43] Ally: Yeah, and also like, you know, if, yeah, I guess
[00:47:47] Mike: Let's say you were dating a guy and he liked every Thursday night to go to the bath house and just get reamed out by guys.
[00:47:54] Ally: ah So he's a bomb too.
[00:47:54] Mike: They're all wearing their. Yeah, of course.
[00:47:58] Ally: That would be a problem. I would not want a data guy who's a bomb.
[00:48:02] Mike: Why not? Let's. Okay. So when you're imagining a bisexual guy, it's that other guys are giving him moral sex or that he's fucking them.
[00:48:05] Ally: yeah
[00:48:10] Ally: I imagine it's that he's fucking other guys.
[00:48:13] Mike: Okay. okay
[00:48:14] Ally: new
[00:48:17] Mike: So if he's a bottom, what's the issue? If he's a bottom, it's the, it's some sort of emotional thing.
[00:48:21] Ally: But that's okay. I don't know. It's that that makes him, yeah, that makes him weaker.
[00:48:29] Mike: It makes him weaker. Okay.
[00:48:31] Ally: Yeah.
[00:48:32] Mike: So it's the same, it's the same as if you, there was a guy that liked being pegged by you.
[00:48:32] Ally: ah
[00:48:35] Mike: You wouldn't be a fan of that.
[00:48:38] Ally: That I'm more okay with, um because it's like, well, I don't know. and I'd probably have to experience it, but if it seems like it's something that he wants me to do, you know, to increase his pleasure of having sex with me, as long as he's also penetrating me.
[00:48:46] Mike: So, so if your boyfriend.
[00:48:55] Ally: I guess if it's the kind of gay relationship where like they trade off, you know, like, then it's sort of okay. But if he's just going to the bathhouse just to get his ass streamed out, I don't like it.
[00:49:07] Mike: but What if, I mean, it wouldn't bother you to watch some other guy just just giving it to him? That wouldn't be a problem.
[00:49:15] Ally: No, because I find men attractive. And so like i think you know I think gay porn that's two guys is hot. So I think I would find it hot. I think that's why I wouldn't be jealous of it. It's because I would be like, oh, this is attractive.
[00:49:25] Ally: you know
[00:49:26] Mike: so if you're so if you So I just want to make sure, so so you don't you wouldn't like it if he just exclusively exclusively was a bottom, but if your boyfriend was bi and he wanted you to watch him, watch some other guy ejaculating in his ass, he'd be like, that's that's that's hot.
[00:49:40] Ally: Yeah. yeah
[00:49:42] Mike: Hmm, okay. And same thing if they ejaculated in his mouth.
[00:49:47] Ally: Yeah.
[00:49:49] Mike: What if he wanted to kiss you after that?
[00:49:51] Ally: I don't think I would like that.
[00:49:53] Mike: Why not?
[00:49:56] Ally: I think for the same reason that you guys have brought up is like semen has a not great texture where if you're aroused and you're you know in the process of giving a blow job or doing something that arouses you and you get semen in your mouth, it's hot.
[00:50:12] Mike: Okay.
[00:50:13] Ally: If you're, you know, If you're not directly involved, I guess somebody just gave me a shot glass of semen. I would not want to just you know take that shot. It's it's a gross texture.
[00:50:24] Mike: Okay.
[00:50:25] Ally: ah
[00:50:25] Mike: Yeah, I know. I mean, it's, and just, you know, you may not have seen this, but they're pornswear. Have you seen these pornswear? It's way more than a shot glass. They're ones where it's like, uh, you know, you know, uh, October fest, where the steins of beer that they drink, you can find warrants where it's like that kind of level of quantity.
[00:50:38] Ally: Yeah.
[00:50:42] Ally: yeah
[00:50:43] Mike: That would be pretty.
[00:50:43] Ally: i Yeah, I was looking up with a guy once who I think had that fetish because he would text me and be like, oh, I want to like, you know, save up all my semen and then give you like a cup of it or something. And I was like, oh yeah, like that would be great.
[00:50:54] Ally: Like I would not do that.
[00:50:56] Mike: Did you pretend for him that you were into that?
[00:50:58] Ally: Yeah.
[00:51:00] Mike: Did you do it?
[00:51:01] Ally: No.
[00:51:03] Mike: But you would have probably, or was that your bright line?
[00:51:05] Ally: e I don't think I would do that.
[00:51:08] Mike: So you would have said, look, you pretended you, you kind of went along with it, but you were okay.
[00:51:08] Ally: That would be too gross.
[00:51:13] Mike: It's, the but I think you probably would be willing to have him nut in a glass and then drink it right then.
[00:51:21] Mike: Or do you only want to,
[00:51:21] Ally: Yeah, if it was pretty, if it was still warm. yeah
[00:51:24] Mike: You wouldn't like it though. You'd rather just straight out of his penis problem.
[00:51:27] Ally: Yeah.
[00:51:28] Mike: Yeah.
[00:51:28] Ally: Yeah, because I mean, like, the the point of having them ejaculate in your mouth is that it's so far back that you basically swallow and it's gone. It's not like you have to, like, swish it around in your mouth. and feel It's like, you know, it's like egg whites. It's like a snot like texture.
[00:51:40] Ally: You don't want to have like a glob of snot in your mouth for a long time. But if it's just going straight down your throat, it's OK.
[00:51:47] Mike: Sure. Okay, so you so so actually you disagree with this person like you would with with like you disagree with the the women who are kind of discriminating against this guy, you would actually not have a problem with a bi guy.
[00:51:59] Ally: Right.
[00:51:59] Mike: Sounds like as long as you were his primary partner, and he wasn't ah getting reamed out exclusively in the bathhouse.
[00:52:00] Ally: Yeah.
[00:52:07] Ally: Yeah. I mean, the one thing I'd be concerned about is, like, AIDS, right? Or, like, you know, diseases. Because if he's having...
[00:52:16] Mike: Would you want to have an MMF threesome with the guy and like co-give a blow or something?
[00:52:18] Ally: Oh, interesting.
[00:52:23] Ally: Yeah, sure.
[00:52:25] Mike: would you Would it gross you out to actually watch the semen getting pumped into his mouth?
[00:52:25] Ally: so it is
[00:52:30] Ally: No.
[00:52:31] Mike: Okay. Okay. Would you like to do the lollipop thing or like the, i the answer is going to be yes. You, you would do any such activities. Oh, were you like, so it's a common trope in MFF scenes and porn for like the women to kind of like lick the penis together.
[00:52:46] Mike: And then when he comes, they like sort of, he gives a little to each of them and it's, they're kind of licking all around it.
[00:52:51] Ally: Oh, yeah, sure.
[00:52:53] Mike: And so you could imagine you and your boyfriend.
[00:52:54] Ally: Sure, I would do that.
[00:52:55] Mike: Okay.
[00:52:55] Ally: I would not want the third guy to like switch between fucking both of us, but I think that would be unsanitary.
[00:53:03] Mike: Well, he could fuck your ass as well.
[00:53:08] Ally: now i mean I don't have any problems that would require a fecal turn split.
[00:53:08] Mike: Not into that. it would be But it would be kind of a poor man's fecal transplant.
[00:53:17] Mike: it would be a
[00:53:21] Mike: It's a way to get closer to your partner.
[00:53:22] Ally: I guess, yeah. yeah
[00:53:25] Mike: I'm surprised. yeah I think you should explore some of this with your significant other and see if he's into it.
[00:53:32] Ally: Oh, no, i'm I'm very sure he's, I think I've asked him, like, you know, if he's ever had any, like, gay thoughts, whatever he's ever wanted to make out with a guy or something. And he said, categorically, no, um which I found surprising, because he's very into musical theater, but, you know, pretty good.
[00:53:48] Mike: Which is pretty gay, we can agree. are you But is this is this important to you? Or is this like you're just saying, hey, this is something you would do, but it's not like a fantasy. It's not something that you care about. If this never happens, you'd be fine.
[00:53:58] Ally: Oh, yeah, i' it never happens. That's fine.
[00:54:00] Mike: Okay, that's interesting.
[00:54:01] Ally: um just I've just I've thought about it before, because I feel like I am a ah very jealous person when it comes to like the idea of my partner sleeping with other women. But when I'm imagining my partner sleeping with other men, it's like, it's a spectrum from you know, I don't care. That's fine. Like, oh, that's kind of hot. And I've, you know, tried to interrogate why that is.
[00:54:20] Ally: um And not come to very satisfying conclusions. I guess it's just like, I only see my competition as being other women, I guess, or I see my value as being firmly rooted in my gender in a relationship.
[00:54:34] Mike: Okay. Okay.
[00:54:35] Ally: I don't know.
[00:54:37] Mike: Your gender, your your biological sex or your gender, which which you mean.
[00:54:41] Ally: Both?
[00:54:42] Mike: Yeah, I know. It doesn't matter.
[00:54:42] Ally: How do you feel about that?
[00:54:44] Mike: Okay. We've got one more.
[00:54:45] Ally: like I mean feel like it's for men, it's more common that they're like, oh, you know my wife fucking another chick would be so hot.
[00:54:46] Mike: Oh, go ahead. Yeah.
[00:54:51] Ally: like Do you feel that way? like You wouldn't be jealous if your wife were cheating on you with a woman, but you would if it were with a man?
[00:54:58] Mike: Um, let's see.
[00:55:01] Mike: Well, I mean, you you you you inserted the notion of cheating on, which implies like something some some like infidelity more than just getting reamed out of the bathhouse for fun.
[00:55:11] Ally: so okay well i mean i i Okay, so say that she like proposes to you and is like, I want to sleep with a woman, like would you feel jealous or would you be like, no, absolutely not?
[00:55:19] Mike: Well, I mean, it'd be more fun if I was involved, but I could understand, I, but I would understand. yeah Yeah, I don't think, I don't think that in sex, men don't view women as particularly threatening because their appendage doesn't go out.
[00:55:33] Mike: So it's not a weapon in the same way the man's penis is, but like.
[00:55:35] Ally: Oh, okay. But if your wife said, hey, I want to have sex with another man, and you would say, no. You'd have some concerns.
[00:55:43] Mike: Yeah, that would be much more concerning, much as the threesome with a guy situation would be much more concerning, because now there's this weapon roaming around the room that could potentially ah turn me into a ah ah gay boy.
[00:55:51] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
[00:55:55] Ally: Yeah.
[00:55:58] Ally: What if your wife wants to have sex with a trans man, like pre-ox?
[00:55:58] Mike: And I'm, yeah. and Lord. So that's a woman, that's a woman who wants to pretend to be a guy.
[00:56:06] Ally: Right.
[00:56:09] Mike: but has like hair and stuff and this act. i mean then then so okay So I think people won't like this very much, but it's toward the end of the show. But I think the i think that ah i think the reaction I would have there is actually nothing to do with the...
[00:56:23] Mike: like Yeah, I know, but it's not that.
[00:56:23] Ally: like There's no penis involved is what I'm saying, but like it's somebody who looks masculine.
[00:56:26] Mike: Now it's yeah now it's like, hey, I wanna have sex with a person that's like mentally not all there. It's like got some problems. And I think that would kind of gross me out. it's like like Why do you, this person has like some sort of weird unresolved
[00:56:34] Ally: Yeah.
[00:56:38] Ally: o
[00:56:38] Mike: gender issues and like, why is that attractive to you? You know what I mean?
[00:56:42] Ally: Yeah, yeah, okay.
[00:56:45] Mike: That would that would make me more, and yeah, I'd be like, ah yeah, I want it again.
[00:56:49] Ally: So if your wife was like, I want to have sex with a really dumb woman, you'd be like, no, I have some problems.
[00:56:58] Mike: Now that I can understand better. Depends on now, if she was also obese and or unattractive, that would be and confusing. But if it's like a very, very attractive yet not not smart woman, that that's kind of a normal that would that would be sort of normal for men.
[00:57:14] Mike: Right.
[00:57:14] Ally: I guess.
[00:57:15] Mike: But I mean, yeah, I've never been confronted with the trans woman or trans man. The trans woman seems like it might be more interesting because then there's a penis. Right.
[00:57:24] Ally: Yeah, but you had this categorical no penises rule of the penis is a weapon.
[00:57:29] Mike: It's true. Although you know in trans woman porn, a lot of times the penis is pretty limp. i see I assume owing to the various hormonal situations.
[00:57:39] Ally: and
[00:57:40] Mike: So even when they come in porn, it's often not very impressive. Well, actually that's it's often not. sometimes Sometimes it's very impressive and then you're like, okay, this person is obviously not.
[00:57:52] Mike: As for far along the journey, it might be sort of pretending to be a trans woman.
[00:57:54] Ally: um Yeah.
[00:57:57] Mike: um you Do you consume a lot of trans porn?
[00:58:00] Ally: No, I don't think I've ever seen transport.
[00:58:03] Mike: Why not? You're not curious, just either.
[00:58:04] Ally: I don and don't see a lot of porn to begin with. That's sort of niche. There's not that much Amish transport.
[00:58:10] Mike: All right.
[00:58:13] Ally: There's probably no trans Amish people, right? Like, that seems like it.
[00:58:16] Mike: Well, I think they probably would leave the, leave the, uh, the community.
[00:58:18] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
[00:58:19] Mike: We're going to become, uh, trans trans. Cause it's probably not, it's probably frowned upon. Uh, so I, before we finish, I have a couple of things here about eating ass.
[00:58:28] Ally: okay
[00:58:29] Mike: Have you, have you ever had somebody eat your ass?
[00:58:31] Ally: No.
[00:58:32] Mike: Never.
[00:58:33] Ally: No.
[00:58:33] Mike: You've never had anybody sort of wander down there.
[00:58:35] Ally: No.
[00:58:37] Mike: What what would you do if that started to happen?
[00:58:41] Ally: Push them all the way.
[00:58:42] Mike: You would stop it.
[00:58:43] Ally: Yeah. I mean, as you recall, I don't even like to have my vagina on the water.
[00:58:49] Mike: You don't like your, you don't, yeah, you don't like your shiny licked.
[00:58:52] Ally: ah
[00:58:53] Mike: Um, okay. This person is asking whether people eat ass, put their tongue inside the anus or just lick the external area. It sounds like you would have the same question. You have no idea what they do.
[00:59:02] Ally: I have no idea. I assume that they put their tongue inside because people are gross, but like I don't think they should do that.
[00:59:07] Mike: why Why not? What's wrong with putting your tongue inside?
[00:59:10] Ally: You're more likely to get E. coli on your tongue.
[00:59:13] Mike: Did you know that the people, the the triathlon swimmers in the in the river in Paris now all have E. coli?
[00:59:19] Ally: Yeah, I think that's very sad.
[00:59:20] Mike: It's awesome. I think it's hilarious.
[00:59:23] Ally: I saw this social media campaign like a week before the Olympics started. The people who were like, oh, everybody go shit in the river. It's like they're trying to clean it up, and this is funny.
[00:59:31] Mike: I don't think they needed to. Well, you know, as well as I do that, like you would, even a thousand people sitting in there wouldn't, it would dilute it.
[00:59:32] Ally: Yeah.
[00:59:37] Mike: You would need more. There's must be a lot of sewage in that thing, way more than a few people doing it.
[00:59:42] Ally: yeah i think Yeah.
[00:59:42] Mike: Uh, okay. So you would, you would be negative on that because, because of the E. coli. Uh, and,
[00:59:50] Ally: I think it's unhygienic. And I think there's basically no way to make it hygienic. The inner rectum is porous and wrinkly. And like you can't clean it.
[01:00:00] Mike: okay.
[01:00:00] Ally: Well, and you know like stuff is all stuff is continuously moving down. So like you clean it. And then how long you know do you think you have it cleaned for? I don't think there's a way.
[01:00:07] Mike: What would you guess like 20 minutes or not enough?
[01:00:11] Ally: Yeah, maybe. i mean It depends it depends like what they've eaten.
[01:00:12] Mike: Okay.
[01:00:14] Ally: and
[01:00:15] Mike: So here's another person during a BJ, the guy asked if I would also go lower and lick his ass. Have you had a guy ask you this?
[01:00:22] Ally: No, but also, like ah three that's not just lower. That's like all the way around. right like
[01:00:27] Mike: Around the balls.
[01:00:28] Ally: yeah
[01:00:29] Mike: Okay. But, you know, sort of maneuver.
[01:00:30] Ally: I would assume if he says, can you go lower, he means his balls.
[01:00:34] Mike: That's interesting.
[01:00:34] Ally: And then he's like, no, keep going. And you're like, OK, so you want me to like leave your genital area. You want me to stop doing this?
[01:00:39] Mike: It says he shyly asked if I would also be up for licking his asshole.
[01:00:41] Ally: Oh, god.
[01:00:44] Mike: I've been asked to do this before, so I politely declined. He was fine with it, but I felt bad because I felt like maybe he was embarrassed. Is this something I should be worried about? He says no fingers are penetrating objects, but he just wants the the exterior.
[01:00:56] Mike: You would say no to this.
[01:00:57] Ally: I would say no to this. Also, why is this the one topic on the sex subreddit where I got like an NSFW thing I had to click through to read it? It's just text. like What is it about this one that's worse than all the others?
[01:01:08] Mike: Uh, well, it it sounds like you don't, you're not into it. So maybe you, you'd be the right person to answer that question.
[01:01:13] Ally: No, I'm just saying, like what is there filter for it? Maybe the person who wrote this tagged it. and i mean Everything in the sex subreddit is not safe from work, right?
[01:01:19] Mike: and I thought everything on the, right. That would be my prior on that.
[01:01:24] Ally: I don't know.
[01:01:26] Mike: Okay. So you, you've never been asked, you've never had somebody asked to go that direction. You've never, wait, you've never been asked.
[01:01:31] Ally: No. Have you?
[01:01:34] Mike: Have I had somebody ask me to do that? No, no, I guess I'm in the same boat as you are on this.
[01:01:40] Ally: Yeah. I mean, I think it's a more recent thing. And i I think I'm not in the right demographic of people who request this or have this requested up.
[01:01:47] Mike: What is the closest? What is the closest on a male body your tongue has gotten to his anus in inches?
[01:01:54] Ally: Oh, I don't know. I mean, like the base of the, I mean, like around the ball sack. I mean, it's probably been pretty close.
[01:02:01] Mike: So like three inches.
[01:02:02] Ally: Yeah.
[01:02:04] Mike: It's pretty close, but I mean, realize they're like,
[01:02:06] Ally: Yeah, like I've licked the whole ball sack. So like, however close, you know, the closest part of your body is.
[01:02:11] Mike: why did you, was it dirty? I mean, what we did, was there, why did you lick the whole ball sack? He asked you to, or is that typically part of your blow job?
[01:02:16] Ally: That's part of the blowjob, you know.
[01:02:20] Mike: Is you, you, so you felt like, had you done something wrong?
[01:02:20] Ally: No, I would say this would be like more of like a full service experience.
[01:02:28] Mike: You'd like, you cheated on it.
[01:02:29] Ally: No! I think it was to show appreciation. you know like I like all of this.
[01:02:33] Mike: He got you a, like he got you a good present or like took you out to a nice dinner and you wanted to lick the ball sack.
[01:02:34] Ally: like I want to lick everything.
[01:02:40] Ally: Now, I took that like love languages test recently, and my love languages are quality time and physical touch.
[01:02:48] Mike: Oh, okay.
[01:02:48] Ally: So not really into gift giving. so Well, there are like there are five of them, right?
[01:02:51] Mike: I was going to say, isn't that everybody's love language is quality time and okay.
[01:02:57] Ally: So there's like quality time, physical touch, like Words of affirmation, acts of service, and gift giving.
[01:02:59] Mike: Money.
[01:03:03] Ally: So I don't like those last three as much as...
[01:03:04] Mike: I don't think mine is any of those. Is there, is there one that's just being left alone?
[01:03:10] Ally: No.
[01:03:11] Mike: That's too bad.
[01:03:11] Ally: and Maybe that's acts of service. Maybe it's an act of service to leave you alone. I think they mean stuff like, you know oh, he did the dishes or something, but like...
[01:03:20] Mike: I understand. Yeah, they don't, they don't, they haven't, uh, plumbed the depth.
[01:03:25] Ally: Right.
[01:03:25] Mike: Okay. Uh, it's been over an hour, so I think we'll leave it there. Uh, this has been episode, what is this?
[01:03:33] Ally: 175.
[01:03:34] Mike: 1 75 episode 1 75 of your mileage may vary. Uh, we will be back. We missed a week cause I was out and Keith remains in South Africa. We will be back next week.
[01:03:44] Mike: Uh, maybe Keith will reappear. Um, in the meantime, if you have feedback or questions, you can send them to Y M M V pod at gmail dot.com and.
[01:03:54] Ally: Or if you have noticed your own dick getting bigger over the past 29 years and you're not, you know, and you're above like 49 or something, you know, like
[01:04:01] Mike: Right. That's the problem. Not many. Yeah. If you would have gotten bigger if you were like two years old.
[01:04:06] Ally: If it's gotten bigger over the past 20, or if it's gotten bigger, yeah, post puberty and you have an explanation for that, let us know too.
[01:04:10] Mike: Yeah. That sounds like a recipe for dick pics and really gross penis pump imagery.
[01:04:14] Ally: I mean, we've asked people to send me dick pics that I could rate them and apparently nobody has sent dick pics, so.
[01:04:22] Mike: Well, that's true. Yeah, we didn't get any in response to that. yeah that's this This is the thing, is they're weaponized.
[01:04:28] Ally: so
[01:04:28] Mike: They're not. They don't want them raided. They just want them sent as a weapon.
[01:04:29] Ally: Right.
[01:04:31] Mike: Okay. So that'll do it for episode 175 and we will see you next, hopefully we'll see you next week on your management.

YMMVYour Mileage May Vary

Episode 175: Bisexual Partners, Nashville Bachelorettes, Being Filmed, Penises Getting Longer, Anilingus

Episode Transcript