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Episode 178: Ally's Wild Confession: The Shocking Quest for a Dominant Friend With Benefits

Team YMMV | 9-13-2024 | 1:13:51

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Let's cut right to the chase: Ally is looking for a certain kind of man to satisfy her needs, and she's not finding him. This isn't your typical female ask for a life partner or a long-term relationship. It's more a recognition that she's had difficulty finding someone who can get the job done for her.

Which brings up an interesting difficulty that women can face: It's actually difficult to find out, early in a relationship, how a guy is going to perform in bed. Or, indeed, if he'll be able to perform at all. And, I suspect dick pix are no help, as they're often taken in a flaccid state, or taken from an angle that just doesn't do justice to the man's true stature.

Along the way, we discuss Peyronie's disease, some listener feedback on the podcast and listener questions. And, Mike informs Ally that none other than Bill Clinton, according to a sexual harassment lawsuit by Paula Jones, suffers from Peyronie's Disease. It's an epidemic!

Episode Transcript

Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.

  • [00:00:00] Mike: Hello, and welcome to Your Mileage May Vary. We talk about sex and relationships with frankness that is often controversial, but mostly in good faith. I'm your host, Mike. I'm here with Ali basking in the post-debate glow from the presidential debate here in the US. But Ali, you did not watch the debate, right?
  • [00:00:17] Ally: No, I didn't watch it. I just saw Taylor Swift's endorsement and I'm all for it.
  • [00:00:21] Mike: yeah And that's because you too you and Taylor Swift, as well as all the women voting for Harris, are cat ladies. You have two cats.
  • [00:00:28] Ally: yeah Yeah, yeah, childless cat ladies for Kamala.
  • [00:00:31] Mike: Okay. And you, the problem you have in your life, this is true that the, the, maybe the biggest problem you have in your life right now is that you don't have any men in your area. You live in the San Francisco Bay area. There are no men in the area that are eligible and reasonable, like people you would be attracted to and like and so on and so forth to give you a good fucking. That's right.
  • [00:00:52] Ally: Yes, that's correct.
  • [00:00:54] Mike: Like this is actually right. Like you don't even want a boyfriend necessarily. I mean, you would, you'd like to have a boyfriend, but you actually at this point or to the point where you just, you actually just want to find a good man to have sex with.
  • [00:01:07] Ally: Yeah, as I was telling you, I just want to find somebody who will fuck me hard maybe you know at least three times a week, I guess.
  • [00:01:11] Mike: Hmm.
  • [00:01:14] Mike: Three times a week. Okay. So it have to be kind of live near you.
  • [00:01:15] Ally: i Yeah, ideally, yeah, because I have found a guy who I really enjoy dating and seeing, but like, there are some issues, actually.
  • [00:01:26] Mike: Okay. So yeah, there are issues with this guy. Let's put a pin in that. I want to first read.
  • [00:01:29] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:01:30] Mike: So we got a, we got a piece of feedback. We've gotten more feedback.
  • [00:01:32] Ally: and
  • [00:01:33] Mike: I think because of the podcast being on YouTube, like YouTube, I think it's better at finding people who I guess send feedback. This is a person named his initials are BB. I'm not going to say his name. He says he found the podcast working through back episodes.
  • [00:01:45] Mike: And this is what, this is the thing I want to say. One thing you may want to consider if you're trying to grow your YouTube subscriptions to educate listeners of the podcast, that they can make their YouTube subscriptions private. Did you know this Allie?
  • [00:01:55] Ally: no
  • [00:01:56] Mike: So you can privately subscribe. He says he was afraid to subscribe. This is the era of censorship we live in.
  • [00:02:00] Ally: ah because people would yeah
  • [00:02:01] Mike: You've got yeah big brother Kamala Harris watching to prevent you from, or Trump. I don't like either of them. So, you know, you've got one of these folks watching you to stop you from subscribing to your favorite porn podcast.
  • [00:02:12] Mike: They force you under the covers to only fans, but he says you can do it. He was afraid, but now he's he's subscribed because he, uh, he was able to make the subscription private.
  • [00:02:22] Ally: No.
  • [00:02:23] Mike: And so people can do that. And also he wanted me to let people know that the channel is not called YMMV.
  • [00:02:24] Ally: Oh, just people would, yeah.
  • [00:02:29] Mike: There's a reason for that. It's called Mike Johnson, which is my stage name. My real name is Mike, but my last name is a stage name.
  • [00:02:32] Ally: Oh.
  • [00:02:34] Mike: So people can search that too.
  • [00:02:34] Ally: Makes sense.
  • [00:02:36] Mike: And the reason why we don't have your mileage may vary as the name of the channel officially on YouTube is because I set it up that way originally and um YouTube banned us.
  • [00:02:47] Ally: Oh.
  • [00:02:47] Mike: And then like, I guess they changed their minds like a couple of years later when I recreated it as my name.
  • [00:02:50] Ally: Can you band us for a language, like for saying cock or like?
  • [00:02:54] Mike: I don't know. It would probably ah for, probably for saying something unsavory, ah not child friendly.
  • [00:02:55] Ally: OK.
  • [00:03:01] Ally: OK.
  • [00:03:02] Mike: I don't, you know what they, they, all you do, it's the Google's like big brother. You just get a band notice. You can then ask them why. And they just, they, you just, they send you the same email again. It's like dealing with a robot.
  • [00:03:11] Ally: Yeah, but it wasn't for like the outro music.
  • [00:03:12] Mike: Yeah.
  • [00:03:15] Mike: No, it wasn't. No, because I think they would just blank that.
  • [00:03:16] Ally: Okay.
  • [00:03:18] Mike: And also nobody, nobody in the U.S.
  • [00:03:19] Ally: right
  • [00:03:20] Mike: knows about ah French music. So I think we're safe there. OK, so let's get back. So people, that's what you can do. And it yeah, I mean, it's cool if you subscribe there. Obviously, you can um subscribe on Spotify, Apple podcast.
  • [00:03:35] Mike: That's where most of our listeners are. We have some number on YouTube, but it is growing more there, which is cool since we put it on there. ah Taylor Swift's endorsement. ah I found, I'm Mattel Emma Swiftie, but I don't actually like her personally.
  • [00:03:50] Mike: I do believe, I believe the rumor that she and jason Kelsey, whatever his name is, the football player have a contract to break up their relationship.
  • [00:03:56] Ally: Oh, yeah, I saw that that was strange. Yeah, because it's like, why would there be such a detailed document if it was fake, but
  • [00:04:02] Mike: i
  • [00:04:06] Mike: Right. I think it's, what do you, no, it wasn't right. Exactly. Exactly. And I looked, you were able to see the pages of an eye and I've worked in, you know, business for a long time and like that document looked real. Like maybe somebody forged it.
  • [00:04:17] Ally: i
  • [00:04:18] Mike: It's not, of course they could have forged it, but like it wasn't some teenager on 4chan who forged it.
  • [00:04:18] Ally: no Yeah.
  • [00:04:22] Mike: It had the words and the verbiage that like marketing manager would use like definitely, you know, they could have just changed the name.
  • [00:04:25] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:04:30] Mike: So you could, you know, it could be fake, but uh,
  • [00:04:31] Ally: Yeah. But so strange that he would do that because, like, what's the benefit for him?
  • [00:04:39] Mike: He's just raising his, you know, raising his, uh, recognizability numbers. And I also think it's possible the NFL is involved because like, I think my, what I've heard anecdotally is like, they've pulled in a lot of female viewers now, just like I, I suspect Keith told me about this, that there's, um, formula one racing become very, became very popular because of a Netflix series.
  • [00:04:47] Ally: oh yeah
  • [00:04:59] Ally: a
  • [00:05:00] Mike: And so there are all these young women who watch it and post crap on Instagram about it. And I was thinking maybe some marketing executive at, this is genius, by the way, at the NFL was like, Hey, if we could do something similar with the NFL, um, we could get a lot more female viewers and what's the best way to do it.
  • [00:05:11] Ally: Oh, yeah. Yeah.
  • [00:05:15] Mike: This is like the perfect, like some fairytale bullshit with, uh, the super bowl winning team.
  • [00:05:18] Ally: Hmm.
  • [00:05:20] Mike: And, um, of course they didn't know they would win the super one. I'm not saying it was a stage or or anything like that, you know, probably just one, but anyway, that's what I think.
  • [00:05:26] Ally: Right. Well, so the rumor with her has always been that she's a lesbian and has to hide it for whatever, you know, palatability of worship. But do you think that he is also gay and hiding it or like?
  • [00:05:37] Mike: No, I just think he's low IQ, you know, tight end.
  • [00:05:42] Ally: But he decided, OK, for a year, I'm just not going to fuck anyone and I'm going to pretend that I'm fucking Taylor Swift.
  • [00:05:42] Mike: who well He could be, oh, I get it. This is getting back to you. You you're you want somebody to come fuck you.
  • [00:05:51] Ally: maybe Maybe other people have lower sex drives. I don't know. I probably wouldn't. But like I feel like if he were fucking somebody else ah like on the DL, that would have come out. you know Somebody would have leaked something about that.
  • [00:06:04] Mike: No, maybe that would even. if Yeah, that's true. And then the women would turn away from the covers. They'd have to pay him a lot of money. I don't know. Like, I don't think it would be that hard for him to have some sort of concubine situation with a woman.
  • [00:06:09] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:06:15] Mike: And and keep in mind, even if he was really dating Taylor Swift, he wouldn't be getting a lot of sex. because She's been on a world tour.
  • [00:06:21] Ally: Yeah, he's come through the world too early.
  • [00:06:22] Mike: So maybe phone sex. maybe No, he was one time part of the stage show at Wembley Stadium.
  • [00:06:24] Ally: He's part of the stage show now. Oh, okay.
  • [00:06:28] Mike: he He hasn't like flown around with them or driven in the bus or whatever.
  • [00:06:30] Ally: Do you want watch all the concert videos?
  • [00:06:33] Mike: I've watched one.
  • [00:06:34] Ally: Aww.
  • [00:06:35] Mike: ah There's a guy who posts...
  • [00:06:35] Ally: What is that one?
  • [00:06:37] Mike: No, it wasn't.
  • [00:06:38] Ally: Okay.
  • [00:06:40] Mike: they're not The concerts aren't great. There's a lot of costume changes. so the like The reason why I like...
  • [00:06:45] Ally: You don't like the concert.
  • [00:06:47] Mike: No, I don't.
  • [00:06:47] Ally: You only drink the music. You just want the...
  • [00:06:49] Mike: I'm there because because very simply because she has the best music producers. like she gets so if you I like pop music. I'm a pop music fan and she has the best stuff right now.
  • [00:06:57] Ally: and Yeah.
  • [00:06:59] Mike: It's like, what do you want? like they're just not like People will say, oh, i like you know this i like um I'm trying to think of who. Uh, Billie Eilish say, but she's just Billie Eilish is not as good as Taylor Swift. She just isn't like, it's not her producer. It's just not, it's not as well done. Like she doesn't have the cash. She doesn't have like the the, the right people. Um, and yeah, and she's not also squarely in the middle of pop. She's trying to be too emo. I could name off other people, but like, yeah, there, are there are other folks that I've tried to listen to and I i can't get there.
  • [00:07:26] Ally: okay
  • [00:07:26] Mike: Um, but let's, let's jump into your issue with your need for a cock. Cause you know, people want to hear that. So you, okay. So last time we talked, you, you were talking, we had a whole episode where there was a man holding a belt that I had chat GPT make as the is the icon for the episode.
  • [00:07:44] Mike: And it was all about how you.
  • [00:07:44] Ally: You did? just I didn't see that. I'll look at that later. um Yeah, so i did I did meet up and hang out with that guy, and nothing happened.
  • [00:07:48] Mike: Yeah. So nothing happened.
  • [00:07:53] Ally: um Possibly, no, possibly because he didn't want anything to happen, but I also definitely did not push for anything to happen. Two reasons. One, it's been a while since I've seen him.
  • [00:08:04] Ally: We're both getting older. he is I want to say at least five years older than me, maybe more than that. And now he has a bald spot. um He's always had kind of longish hair. So he's not trying to cover it, but it is noticeable.
  • [00:08:16] Mike: So it's like a little George Costanza situation here.
  • [00:08:16] Ally: eight
  • [00:08:18] Mike: Like you're just like, look, I don't like bald men.
  • [00:08:19] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:08:20] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:08:20] Ally: Well, i think I think you guys have talked before about this neologism of you know getting the ick. And I guess that's what happened, that I saw him, you know saw the bald spot, kind of refreshed my memory of him and what he looks like.
  • [00:08:26] Mike: Yes.
  • [00:08:33] Ally: and i was not as physically taken with him as I had remembered and kind of not attracted to him now. um I think a lot of it is probably me having changed and had some you know time away from him and other experiences, but yeah, I wasn't into it.
  • [00:08:43] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:08:54] Mike: Did that, did that discourage you because that means that you, this was your sort of main opportunity to get the kind of beating or I mean, people can listen to the last episode.
  • [00:09:03] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:09:04] Mike: They want to know what I'm talking about, but you want it. You want some pretty, I would say moderate punishment from a guy in the DSM area.
  • [00:09:10] Ally: Yeah, yeah. I like rough sex. I don't even know if I would call it BDSM because I looked up like BDSM subreddits to try and see is this and I don't want to be tied up in some intricate way like the the Japanese Rope Shibari or whatever.
  • [00:09:17] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:09:25] Mike: Yeah.
  • [00:09:26] Ally: Like I'm not into like latex outfits and ballgags and stuff like that. I just want somebody to kind of like slap me and shove me around. So I think it's just like rough sex.
  • [00:09:35] Mike: But you OK, but to be fair, you want it.
  • [00:09:36] Ally: I'm good at being tied up, but it's not like being tied up is not the focus of it. I want to be fucked. It's not just getting tied up.
  • [00:09:41] Mike: Right now, I understand that. I mean, to be fair, I think that a lot of times the tying up these complicated things are maybe for the woman's benefit. I'm not sure if guys get it. Maybe they do. Maybe guys get into like the complicated knots and ropes and stuff.
  • [00:09:52] Mike: I don't know.
  • [00:09:52] Ally: I think some guys do. yeah I think it's the same kind of guys who get into anime.
  • [00:09:54] Mike: okay okay
  • [00:09:57] Mike: Right. It's sort of like ah Dwight Schrute with his purple belt and karate.
  • [00:10:00] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
  • [00:10:01] Mike: Um, but the, okay. So, but you did want, like you were interested, for instance, in it getting hit by the closed fist. Like that was okay.
  • [00:10:07] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:10:08] Mike: to You let something where it's kind of rang your bell. That's, I would say that's moderate. That's like, that's not just like a little bit of like, and you also like being choked kind of aggressively.
  • [00:10:11] Ally: Okay.
  • [00:10:15] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
  • [00:10:15] Mike: Right. Okay. So this guy was, an and and so there was enough ick and enough balding with this guy for you just to be like, look, I can't, this isn't going to work.
  • [00:10:26] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:10:27] Mike: totally turned you off. and And you also said, didn't you say that you weren't sure if he really contacted you for sex once you met up with him?
  • [00:10:34] Ally: Yeah, because we met up. you know, in a public place and stuff and like hung out, got dinner, like he didn't ask to come back to my place, um but I also didn't flirt with him.
  • [00:10:46] Ally: So I don't know what the, and yeah, I don't really know what but his goal was.
  • [00:10:47] Mike: yeah Okay. Okay.
  • [00:10:53] Mike: So
  • [00:10:53] Ally: He did hug me a lot. I think he hugged me maybe like three times or something like during the course of the evening.
  • [00:10:59] Mike: Okay. Did that make you more when they go when the guy once you decide like how actually how quickly after you met him? Did you get the ick? Like, did you instantaneously know? Oh, this is a mistake.
  • [00:11:11] Mike: You texted me by the way, like I was where was I?
  • [00:11:12] Ally: i Yeah.
  • [00:11:14] Mike: I was in Tahoe and you texted me and told me.
  • [00:11:16] Ally: Yeah, I think I texted you like half an hour in or something. And I i think I did tell you like that I wasn't sure anything was going to happen, right?
  • [00:11:23] Mike: Right. And obviously, I think I might have said something back to you like, Look, you got it. I mean, we need content.
  • [00:11:26] Ally: Yeah, you were like, you know, take one for the team. We need, you know, we need PodCon.
  • [00:11:28] Mike: Oh, for sure. You need that beating. I mean, we got to like,
  • [00:11:32] Ally: And then I invited you to come so that you could meet him and suss out the situation, but you were not local. um
  • [00:11:38] Mike: right.
  • [00:11:39] Ally: couldn't, you know, couldn't.
  • [00:11:41] Mike: I'm not sure. I'm not sure I would have helped to expect expedite.
  • [00:11:43] Ally: Right.
  • [00:11:44] Mike: I could have told him to listen to an episode and he would have known what you wanted then.
  • [00:11:45] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:11:47] Ally: Yeah. No, I think it was pretty much as soon as he like turned around, I saw the bald spot.
  • [00:11:48] Mike: Yeah.
  • [00:11:52] Ally: And then like, we, you know, hugged and I remembered like, Oh, you know, he's like, my height. kind of quiet. I don't know. i i I remembered him as being, I guess, like more of a like dominating presence and he wasn't anymore.
  • [00:12:09] Ally: um No, yeah, no.
  • [00:12:09] Mike: Anymore, you think he was before. you did Had he lost some like musculature or anything? He hadn't lost any height, I guess.
  • [00:12:15] Ally: Yeah, so I think it. Yeah, I think it's purely my perception of him.
  • [00:12:19] Mike: And this is not that you're in a different place in your life. You still want these, the be you know, kind of aggressive sex.
  • [00:12:24] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
  • [00:12:26] Mike: Okay. Do you find that like, as your, I mean, we can talk about your other option in a minute, but like, as your access to sex has diminished a little bit here, do you find that like your desire for more aggressive sex has gone up?
  • [00:12:39] Ally: So part of the reason why I liked this guy initially when I met him was because I was in a relationship where we weren't having sex basically at all. And it turns out that was because that was the guy who was like already cheating on me.
  • [00:12:52] Ally: But no,
  • [00:12:52] Mike: Wait, what do you mean? This, this guy, the guy with the bald spot was cheating on you.
  • [00:12:58] Ally: no, no, no, no. no when i met the When I met the guy with the bald spot like eight years ago or something,
  • [00:13:04] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:13:04] Ally: I was in this like very long relationship with a guy who was cheating on me. And so I think initially why I was so attracted to him was because like that guy who I was dating and I like quite didn't know was cheating on me, like we weren't having sex with any regularity at all.
  • [00:13:16] Ally: So I think I was already a little bit like unsatisfied. um So I think that kind of like lack of access to sex did increase how much I wanted it.
  • [00:13:25] Mike: so Okay, so the answer is yes.
  • [00:13:28] Ally: Yeah, yeah, I guess it would like, does it increase how much I want like rough sex versus just like any sex? um I don't think so. I think the rough sex is just like inherently like how I want it.
  • [00:13:39] Mike: Okay, because I was imagining maybe a guy who volunteered right now would get like more of a shot at the ultra violence because of the because of your situation.
  • [00:13:39] Ally: um
  • [00:13:48] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:13:49] Mike: Okay, so there's another guy that you
  • [00:13:50] Ally: difficulties like I don't know how to bring it up, particularly like initially. like Before we've had sex at all, there is no good way to bring this up. right There's no way that would be sort of like
  • [00:14:00] Mike: bring up the violence.
  • [00:14:03] Ally: Yeah, like like there's no way to somehow like hint about that or like slip it into conversation without knowing for sure that this guy will fuck you, because then it just makes you sound like insane or slutty.
  • [00:14:04] Mike: We talked about that. yeah
  • [00:14:13] Ally: um And then, yeah, so my other problem is, just with dating guys in general, is that you have no way of knowing what their dick is like ah before it's too late, essentially.
  • [00:14:19] Mike: There we go. When you say they're dick, you mean actually they're penis. like not when you You're not talking about the motion of the ocean.
  • [00:14:30] Mike: You're talking about the actual cylinder penis in there, okay which is something that women often downplay, the importance of size, shape, whatever, the penis, but you're saying it's actually quite important to you.
  • [00:14:32] Ally: Yes. Yeah, so you yeah size shape performance like you had said before that you thought that i I had experience with like primarily small penises.
  • [00:14:50] Mike: Yes.
  • [00:14:50] Ally: ah And I would say it's not true.
  • [00:14:51] Mike: Just because you, you said you could, no, you could fit them all, all the way in your mouth normally. And it's like, that's not normal.
  • [00:15:00] Ally: Yeah, I wouldn't say all the way.
  • [00:15:03] Mike: Okay. You're not, you're not used to having like, ah yeah but you're not used to having your nose sort of nestled up against their pubic bone.
  • [00:15:04] Ally: I feel like I could deep throat all of them. No, no, no, that doesn't happen.
  • [00:15:13] Mike: Oh, okay. how How far down could you usually go on the thing?
  • [00:15:17] Ally: um
  • [00:15:17] Mike: Could you put your hand in between like your full hand on a shaft?
  • [00:15:20] Ally: No, I guess like, you know, maybe like one or two fingers.
  • [00:15:24] Mike: Okay, so that's going to be like, maybe an inch, but you're taking it.
  • [00:15:24] Ally: but
  • [00:15:27] Mike: I mean, still, I think those are not going to be massive cocks like, but okay, so it sounds like you, you want a bigger penis.
  • [00:15:32] Ally: um
  • [00:15:35] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:15:36] Mike: Interesting.
  • [00:15:36] Ally: And also just like, yeah, yeah i you know, ideally on the apps or something, like they would have pictures of them. And then you would just also see like a picture of their erection so that you know what you're getting into.
  • [00:15:48] Ally: Because you could meet a guy who is amazing. And if he has a disappointing penis, now you have a really hard decision to make. But if you know ahead of time, you can select on that and not date a guy with a small or disappointing penis.
  • [00:15:55] Mike: so to speak.
  • [00:16:01] Mike: So you're actually making an argument. So typically I view dick pics as a for a weaponization of texting where a man sends his dick, but you're actually making an argument where a big dick pic can be useful for a woman.
  • [00:16:11] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:16:12] Mike: If you could get a nice erection pic from the guy, although I think a lot of dick pics are not erect. How many I mean.
  • [00:16:17] Ally: Oh, no, I think it would have to be a wreck because there can be substantial differences. And I don't know if you feel like there's anything on a woman's body like this where you're like, oh, I'd really want to see like her bare breasts ahead of time because that's a deal breaker or something.
  • [00:16:20] Mike: Right.
  • [00:16:27] Ally: But like the dick is very important. right like The dick has substantial influence on how good the sex is going to be.
  • [00:16:29] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:16:33] Ally: And there could be a guy out there with like a three-inch dick who's otherwise really handsome and charming. And like you won't know until you actually fuck him. And at that point, you're like, well, I guess I have to give up on this guy.
  • [00:16:44] Ally: I mean, it's terrible.
  • [00:16:46] Mike: And then wait, ah maybe this is what maybe this is what happens when Keith has relationships is that they realize his dick isn't quite all they hoped and then they sort of know about.
  • [00:16:53] Ally: Maybe.
  • [00:16:55] Mike: He claims not. He claims not, by the way. um I'm just saying that the Yankees chain mostly.
  • [00:16:59] Ally: yeah possible If women kind of ghost him after like a month or something after like three or four days, it could be because of that.
  • [00:17:01] Mike: um
  • [00:17:07] Ally: They're like, well, scheduling nice, but I don't see a future here.
  • [00:17:10] Mike: Okay. so do you I mean, you're you've been a woman all your life. You've talked to many women. Do you think that your feelings on this of wanting kind of advanced notice of the cock are normal? like Or do you know if that's sort of common? Because the general cultural sense is that this is not this doesn't matter very much to women. And you're saying the exact opposite.
  • [00:17:30] Ally: Yeah, I would suspect that, however you would phrase it, either like, I'm more shallow or I have a higher sex drive or something, I would suspect that my preference here is not common. And that most women would say that like, the dick is not as important to them as other factors.
  • [00:17:41] Mike: and Okay.
  • [00:17:46] Mike: Okay. Um, what is your.
  • [00:17:50] Ally: And also, because like i I know guys who I know for sure have shitty penises and like they're married. And so like when I you know meet their wives or whatever, it's like, OK, I guess that was not a factor for you.
  • [00:18:00] Ally: like I guess I didn't.
  • [00:18:01] Mike: Okay. What do you mean by a shitty penis?
  • [00:18:02] Ally: I don't know.
  • [00:18:04] Mike: These guys, I assume because you've played with their penis. What do you mean? What what makes their penis a shitty? These, these guys.
  • [00:18:08] Ally: really like Really small or very thin. like
  • [00:18:13] Mike: Okay. What do you consider to be too? Let's start with the so too small. Let's talk about thin. What do you consider to be too thin? Because I think that's actually a less discussed. And I think it is more important than length for women.
  • [00:18:26] Ally: Yeah, I don't know. I mean, you don't want to be able to like overlap here. Like, you know what I mean? Like you want to have like something that you can grab and.
  • [00:18:34] Mike: Okay, so the important thing to use when your hand is around the shaft, you want there to be a space between your thumb and your pointer finger.
  • [00:18:35] Ally: hope i
  • [00:18:41] Ally: That would be great. Yeah, or yeah, I don't know. It's just it's about girth and I can't really say for sure where the line is, but.
  • [00:18:46] Mike: and okay
  • [00:18:48] Ally: um Yeah, you don't want it.
  • [00:18:51] Mike: Okay. But in these guys, these guys, it was more, it was closer to a, like a, your fingers did overlap nicely when putting your hand around their shaft.
  • [00:18:52] Ally: to be like
  • [00:18:59] Mike: And it was, you felt like.
  • [00:19:00] Ally: Well, that's one guy I'm thinking of. And then I'm thinking of another guy who literally has like a two to three inch penis. And like,
  • [00:19:06] Mike: Okay. Okay. And what's your ideal penis?
  • [00:19:11] Ally: six and a half, I guess? I don't know, six?
  • [00:19:14] Mike: length and then and then the thing you said with your hand.
  • [00:19:16] Ally: Yeah, that's true.
  • [00:19:16] Mike: I also don't know how big your hands are, so it's a little like we're not getting perfect data here.
  • [00:19:21] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:19:21] Mike: um But I can generally get a sense of what you're talking about.
  • [00:19:23] Ally: I don't know, I wear like a small glove.
  • [00:19:27] Mike: Okay, okay. So people, if they're curious whether they would, it's this is a little like a Cinderella in reverse. People, if you live in the San Francisco Bay Area and you think you're a candidate, don't
  • [00:19:32] Ally: Oh, God, yeah. yeah but If they're curious, they should send a pic to whatever it is, YMMB. According to you, nobody has ever sent a pic or sent any commentary that relates to me at all.
  • [00:19:44] Mike: No, no, no.
  • [00:19:46] Ally: So I'm feeling a little bit bad that all of the emails are just about how much they want you and Keith to be gay. and
  • [00:19:51] Mike: Yeah, that's true. ah know we have We have a listener thing coming up that mentions you.
  • [00:19:54] Ally: OK.
  • [00:19:55] Mike: the ah the um We have gotten dick pics before. um not ah They're not great.
  • [00:19:59] Ally: But you've not shown me. Are they gay depicts? OK.
  • [00:20:03] Mike: Yeah, I mean, of course they are. They're sent to guys. It's not it's not what you want. ah there Yeah, there might be an ANS or two in there.
  • [00:20:07] Ally: OK. Oh, yeah, no, I don't want that.
  • [00:20:09] Mike: um Okay, so you're perfect, pe but so you don't want like an abnormally large. Okay, so so you're sort of seeing a guy right now, actually, or something.
  • [00:20:18] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
  • [00:20:19] Mike: And he has a, so you you seem it seems like if there were, if there were like a disability placard, like the You know the wheelchair placard that you you know, like but I'll drive a license plate if there was a wheelchair placard you could have on guys For their cock you seem to manage to date you've managed you've managed to be with a number of these guys You got the guy with the three-inch penis the guy with the really narrow penis and now this guy what's wrong with him?
  • [00:20:31] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:20:42] Ally: The three of us being this guy was kind of like a one night thing, I think.
  • [00:20:45] Mike: Okay, but still he was he was parking in disabled spot, you know
  • [00:20:45] Ally: Well, so even like, yeah, even my ex like, basically couldn't get an erection unless he had taken a pill beforehand. So that's somewhat of a disability, but this guy, so
  • [00:20:56] Mike: Are you sure that's not? Wait, are you sure that's not your fault? Like what if you showed him some porn or like a VR porn that was really hot? Do you think you could have gotten an erection then? Like maybe you're just not doing it for him.
  • [00:21:06] Ally: maybe we didn't try that. I mean, he would get erections in the morning and then like sometimes when we were making out in the shower or something he would.
  • [00:21:11] Mike: Wait, did he beat off?
  • [00:21:13] Ally: Yeah, not like not in front of me, but I mean, I assume.
  • [00:21:18] Mike: But he he was able to get erections. This must be really painful for a woman. He was able to get erections consistently to masturbate, but not with you.
  • [00:21:24] Ally: Well, so he was able to get an erection consistently like in the morning, right? Like he would wake up with an erection. But like if he knew that we were going to have sex, he would get like anxiety about it.
  • [00:21:29] Mike: That's different.
  • [00:21:32] Ally: And so he would like take a pill like to make sure that that it would work or that it wouldn't like
  • [00:21:33] Mike: and
  • [00:21:37] Mike: Sure, because he'd had this problem in the past and worried that it'll happen again.
  • [00:21:37] Ally: go yeah yeah I mean, again, like it could be me and like it's so hard to tell. right like Objectively, you can you know you can tell me whether you think I'm i don't know unattractive enough that somebody would like not be able to get it up for me.
  • [00:21:44] Mike: this is
  • [00:21:51] Ally: but like I don't think that's the problem, but hard to say.
  • [00:21:54] Mike: Well, I haven't seen you.
  • [00:21:54] Ally: um
  • [00:21:55] Mike: I haven't seen you naked, so I'm not totally sure, but I let's let's let's stipulate that you're not unattractive enough that a man couldn't get an erection.
  • [00:21:57] Ally: i
  • [00:22:02] Mike: I think we can stipulate that.
  • [00:22:03] Ally: Thank you. Thank you so much.
  • [00:22:03] Mike: I think that's fine. Yeah.
  • [00:22:04] Ally: I appreciate it.
  • [00:22:05] Mike: Yeah.
  • [00:22:05] Ally: um Yeah, but so this guy who I'm seeing, who I like a lot, and he's extremely smart, and I respect him so much.
  • [00:22:06] Mike: Yeah.
  • [00:22:09] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:22:12] Ally: He's so funny. I like i like him a lot.
  • [00:22:13] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:22:14] Ally: um No.
  • [00:22:15] Mike: So he's sounding like maybe like Bill Clinton.
  • [00:22:19] Mike: i mentioned I mentioned that because I think his penis problem might, Bill Clinton has the same penis problem he has, but go on.
  • [00:22:24] Ally: Really? Oh, okay.
  • [00:22:25] Mike: Oh yeah.
  • [00:22:26] Ally: but So there's...
  • [00:22:26] Mike: And that's why, yeah, go on. yeah This is why when when this is why people when women said that they had sex with Bill Clinton, they're all telling the truth.
  • [00:22:28] Ally: That's why what? That's why he walks around a lot? like
  • [00:22:36] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:22:38] Mike: And the reason why you know it is because of what you're about to tell us about this guy's penis. And it's the same with Bill Clinton's penis. like if Because they knew that about his penis and you wouldn't know that unless you had sex with him.
  • [00:22:45] Ally: Oh, wow. and I didn't know that about Bill Glass.
  • [00:22:49] Mike: Yes, yes, yes.
  • [00:22:50] Ally: That's amazing. Did that come out in the trial and somehow like I was too young?
  • [00:22:53] Mike: I forget. Or either that, or it's like ah the people eating cats in Ohio.
  • [00:22:54] Ally: OK.
  • [00:22:57] Mike: It's just a ah rumor. Although i did find but you know I did find a video of a woman eating a cat, so it did happen.
  • [00:22:59] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:23:02] Mike: It just wasn't a Haitian immigrant. It was a native born Ohioan.
  • [00:23:04] Ally: Interesting. Okay. ah Yeah, I don't want to see that.
  • [00:23:07] Mike: Ohioan, yeah. Okay.
  • [00:23:10] Ally: This guy condition, which apparently is like not uncommon, um called Peroni's disease, where scar tissue somehow builds up, there's some kind of like
  • [00:23:10] Mike: So what's
  • [00:23:15] Mike: yeah
  • [00:23:19] Ally: id idiopathic injury to the penis, scar tissue builds up and it causes like a bend and kind of what feels a little bit like a like a dislocation almost. like It really underscores that the penis is not just like a hard rod.
  • [00:23:30] Ally: right Because like a hard rod that was bent, you could still like use just the same. But the penis is this kind of like fleshy tube where like it bends. And then like you have to be very careful about like how you insert it and at what angle and in what position.
  • [00:23:44] Ally: And you have to like go slowly and stuff, which you know ultimately is
  • [00:23:47] Mike: wait so hang on hang on So we want to understand more about this, but particularly from the woman's perspective for sure.
  • [00:23:49] Ally: I think you know about this, right?
  • [00:23:53] Mike: but Well, i've I know about it from ah from work, which I'm not a doctor or anything, but i ah I am involved in a technology business that has to target search keywords.
  • [00:23:54] Ally: You can describe what the condition is also.
  • [00:24:07] Mike: And I know that Peroni's disease is a search keyword that makes a lot of money for someone. But what I didn't know that you just said is I thought it was just a bend in your penis. It sounds like you're saying that your penis basically kind of like has a joint in the middle of it.
  • [00:24:18] Mike: and so it's sort of There's two so rigid regions and then there's the middle where like you it's kind of flexible even though it's hard.
  • [00:24:24] Ally: Yes.
  • [00:24:26] Mike: That's terrible.
  • [00:24:27] Ally: Yeah, it is.
  • [00:24:27] Mike: I didn't know that. okay so
  • [00:24:29] Ally: It is terrible.
  • [00:24:30] Mike: so he can't
  • [00:24:30] Ally: So like, because scar tissue builds up. And so like the, you know, sometimes it goes away on its own. Apparently for this guy, it's been like this for a year and a half. I don't think it's going away on its own. At the very other end of the spectrum, there's like surgery you can get.
  • [00:24:42] Ally: Understandably, he has not gone for surgery because like, yeah, getting surgery on like your most important body region, that might be scary.
  • [00:24:43] Mike: Uh huh.
  • [00:24:48] Ally: In between that, it seems like there are other like, Medications or like injections you can take to like dissolve the scar tissue that might solve the problem and I'm very invested in trying to get this guy to do that because As we've said I want to be fucked hard in multiple positions Spontaneously and like with this bend thing it's like it all has to be very like tentative and slow and like there's basically like one position where it works like pretty consistently and I'm like I That's not what I want.
  • [00:25:13] Ally: And again, like there's no way to know this before we've already started having sex, right? And should guys disclose ahead of time? Should there?
  • [00:25:21] Mike: Hang on, hang on.
  • [00:25:22] Ally: they
  • [00:25:22] Mike: I want to understand the condition a little more. So couldn't this be a benefit in oral sex?
  • [00:25:24] Ally: and
  • [00:25:26] Mike: Because since there is this joint in the middle of the penis, you could get it down your throat better. Like you can put it in and then sort of angle, like you can, because the middle of it.
  • [00:25:32] Ally: Yeah, oral sex is fine. So yes, like I can give him and have, you know, like I can give blow jobs that worked in life.
  • [00:25:37] Mike: Is it sort of like, is it sort of like one of those sausages from like a porky pig, uh, uh, cartoon you've probably never seen, but where like the sausage is multiple links kind of sucked it. So you have two links.
  • [00:25:45] Ally: No, it's not. It's not that pronounced. No, it's like it's like a little bend. I don't know. And then like it. Yeah, i I think the issue, though, is like if you're inserting it, you know, and then like you want to like be able to like do it forcefully, like getting like either around that bend or making sure that it doesn't like collapse the wrong way is.
  • [00:25:51] Mike: It could double over on itself, a good jackknife, like a truck.
  • [00:26:06] Ally: Like, a yeah, yeah, you don't want to bend it in the direction that it's already bent because I think that would be painful.
  • [00:26:06] Mike: It could.
  • [00:26:11] Ally: um And so you have to worry about.
  • [00:26:13] Mike: Well, and also it, it doesn't work.
  • [00:26:15] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:26:15] Mike: So when he, when he's so, okay, so oral is fine, although that's not what you want. You want your loins to be plowed.
  • [00:26:21] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:26:22] Mike: You want your fields to be plowed. I get it. And so he, when he inserts it, he has to like really carefully get it past that bend point. It sort of matters.
  • [00:26:29] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:26:29] Mike: I'm imagining.
  • [00:26:29] Ally: And then like, you know, every time it's like going back and forth, you have to be like careful. So it has to be like slow and yeah.
  • [00:26:36] Mike: Okay. And you want to look, I don't think, you know how how this is going to work. Like there's no way it's going to get fixed. You're not going to, you're basically wanting to take somebody who's disabled and turn them into like Rocky Balboa. It's not going to happen.
  • [00:26:47] Mike: Like you want to be pounded. You need somebody. Yeah. You need somebody with.
  • [00:26:51] Ally: I would like to see how, yeah, well, I mean, I'd like to see how fixed it could get if the injections work or whatever, or if I can convince him to like, I don't know, try and get it fixed.
  • [00:26:51] Mike: a
  • [00:27:00] Mike: Why won't he do it?
  • [00:27:00] Ally: like No, I think it's just because he wasn't really seeing anyone while this was happening and didn't consider it to be a huge priority.
  • [00:27:02] Mike: Is he poor?
  • [00:27:12] Mike: How did it happen in the first place? Just, it just ah started or.
  • [00:27:14] Ally: He doesn't know. He said like, yeah, he said one time he was masturbating and then there's like noticed that that this like that there was a bend and then
  • [00:27:20] Mike: Do you believe that? I think he, I think he did something. I think he like was like, yeah, I'm going to masturbate with like a rubber band really tightly around my cock. I bet he did it.
  • [00:27:27] Ally: Possibly. I'll ask him
  • [00:27:29] Mike: He noticed, he noticed while beating off. Like, so does does he masturbate now? Can it get, does it affect that? Does he have a tight state?
  • [00:27:36] Ally: ah
  • [00:27:37] Mike: I have so many questions. Does he have a tight circumcision?
  • [00:27:39] Ally: No, and he he does masturbate now, and he said it does make it a little bit more difficult. Like he said before, I don't know if I should. like so it takes It takes more time now um for him to come, and that it's not like a guarantee that it'll like happen every time.
  • [00:27:50] Mike: Okay. Yeah. yeah
  • [00:27:56] Mike: And this is a general problem you have beyond the the erectile dysfunction that you may or may not caused and have caused in your previous relationship. You also have been with men who can't finish, right?
  • [00:28:08] Ally: Have I? No, I don't think so.
  • [00:28:10] Mike: Okay. Well, this guy, this guy,
  • [00:28:12] Ally: This guy can finish just like not every time, I guess. um Okay.
  • [00:28:15] Mike: Well, that's what I mean. Okay. So there's like this stress through the whole thing and that's, this is the opposite of what you want. So these are men you're dating men significantly older than you.
  • [00:28:21] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:28:24] Mike: Have you considered dating men significantly younger than you because then they will have fully functional equipment.
  • [00:28:25] Ally: yeah
  • [00:28:29] Ally: You know, no, because like I'm very attracted to the kind of phenotype of an older man. But this is something I wanted to ask you. like Both of these men are almost 50.
  • [00:28:35] Mike: Yeah. yeah
  • [00:28:37] Ally: And I was wondering, you know is this something where, if I want to date a man who's around that age, I'm just going to have to deal with some kind of penile deficiency? Or is it just that I happen to be picking duds?
  • [00:28:50] Mike: I think that ah I think probably the answer is you will have to deal with it. And my reasoning is that like people are so unhealthy now that like this is going to be definitely like related to.
  • [00:28:55] Ally: Come on.
  • [00:29:01] Mike: how well people are maintaining their health, and I bet it. ah Well, anecdotally, I know like this can happen significantly younger than that. These types of problems, not not specifically cronies disease, but like problems with erectile dysfunction and stuff.
  • [00:29:13] Mike: And like look, it just relates to your body's a machine. And if you can't if you don't keep your machine, like you need to have good cardiovascular health, good student menopause.
  • [00:29:22] Ally: So what's the corresponding thing that happens to women that I should like watch out for? But like i mean even if you're really healthy, you're not going to prevent menopause.
  • [00:29:32] Mike: No, I know, but what what do you mean?
  • [00:29:33] Ally: ah
  • [00:29:35] Mike: Oh, you mean to prevent yourself from doing that?
  • [00:29:36] Ally: like Not everybody gets erectile dysfunction. And and I think what you're implying is that like you don't have erectile dysfunction because you work out a lot. And so what is the corresponding thing for women? No matter how much I work out, I'm still going to go through menopause.
  • [00:29:46] Ally: So it's not like I can prevent it.
  • [00:29:48] Mike: Oh, um, yeah, I'm not sure if there is a corresponding thing for women.
  • [00:29:53] Ally: Okay.
  • [00:29:53] Mike: Uh, I mean, certainly like, I bet you that I think with a lot of these things that like female, like sex drive is probably tied to health generally.
  • [00:30:03] Ally: Okay.
  • [00:30:03] Mike: So if you, yeah, I mean, I would guess like there might be psychological factors, but i yeah, I mean, the erection is like a specific, you know, uh, thing that, that, and it's not just the erection. It's like being able to go through the process of sexual arousal.
  • [00:30:15] Mike: I mean, these guys might also be on like SSRIs. Like stuff like that'll mess with it.
  • [00:30:19] Ally: No.
  • [00:30:20] Mike: How do you know?
  • [00:30:22] Ally: Well, I mean, with for my ex, I know because we live together and I've seen all of his medicines and stuff like that. We've traveled together. um For the new guy, I'm pretty sure he would have told me. I've also seen his like medicine cabinet and stuff like that's all that. So I guess either he's like hiding it somewhere or...
  • [00:30:40] Mike: Sure, it could be, but he's not. Yeah, you can't hide the the the the weird bend in his penis. Which way does it bend normally? does it like Or does it can it does it kind of flop around? Does it like go down, left, right, up?
  • [00:30:52] Mike: you know
  • [00:30:52] Ally: I guess like from his perspective, I think i think left. i mean So the thing is, like i've they update it up I've dated other guys whose penises like um had like a direction or whatever, but it just like wasn't a problem.
  • [00:30:58] Mike: This kind of grosses you out, doesn't it?
  • [00:31:06] Ally: That was just something they were sort of born with, where like their erection wouldn't be just like straight out. you know It would be like the side or something. But as long as like the whole thing is to the side or if the whole thing is tilted forward to something, that's fine.
  • [00:31:17] Ally: It's it's like the bend that that makes it a problem. um
  • [00:31:21] Mike: Yeah, I mean, I think, I think like this, yeah, this is going to be very fitness tied. So like maybe meeting guys on Strava or something, uh, which is apparently Strava is like the new, the new social network for meeting people, unfortunately.
  • [00:31:25] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:31:30] Ally: Okay.
  • [00:31:33] Mike: Cause then, you know, it's supposed to just be for, uh, people, uh, join like running groups.
  • [00:31:34] Ally: Really? How do you meet somebody on Strava?
  • [00:31:39] Mike: They.
  • [00:31:39] Ally: Oh, I've heard about the run club thing. Yeah.
  • [00:31:42] Mike: Yeah, they post you know all this crap every time they do a run. they you know they They form a social network just the same way they would on Instagram or something on that thing.
  • [00:31:50] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:31:52] Mike: um but yeah i mean i think like it's i don't think I think you ought to be able to find a guy with a functional penis, but I hear the problem that like when you're getting to know the person, you you can't ah you sort of can't ask that.
  • [00:32:05] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:32:05] Mike: um
  • [00:32:06] Ally: Or like do you think there is a way to like solicit this information?
  • [00:32:06] Mike: and so this is
  • [00:32:10] Ally: Or do you think that guys should volunteer this information? like If you know you're operating with non-standard equipment, like should you mention that in some way?
  • [00:32:18] Mike: i think i think that I think for the most part, if you know what what the guy's BMI is, if you know kind of how fast he can run a mile, ah you know how much he can bench press, like there's just a few things like that.
  • [00:32:19] Ally: like
  • [00:32:31] Mike: that in these could be brought These actually could be discussed in a casual conversation. I think those things actually would be likely. i don' i'm not I don't have the data on this, but I'd be surprised if those didn't correlate.
  • [00:32:37] Ally: Yeah. That would speak to function, but it wouldn't necessarily speak to length or girth, right? like
  • [00:32:44] Mike: That's right. That's right. Yeah, that one. um I mean, what you could you could have is there like a swimming pool near where you live and you could like make a big deal, like a point of like going swimming with these people or going in the ocean and be like, you know, I really like a man in speedo.
  • [00:32:57] Mike: And then you could try to like get a sense.
  • [00:32:58] Ally: Try to eyeball it.
  • [00:32:59] Mike: You could have a male friend that like hangs.
  • [00:33:00] Ally: yeah I do live near the ocean. I could try that. yeah Oh.
  • [00:33:03] Mike: You could have a male friend that like brings it up. hum
  • [00:33:06] Ally: Yes. Yeah. Well, you have a hot tub, so I could engineer but some kind of scenario.
  • [00:33:10] Mike: It's true. Yeah.
  • [00:33:11] Ally: Yeah. I feel like you need you need to like vet these guys or wingman.
  • [00:33:14] Mike: The problem is they would have to be erect, and so I don't want to have a man with an erection around me.
  • [00:33:16] Ally: Right.
  • [00:33:19] Ally: Right.
  • [00:33:19] Mike: That's gonna gross.
  • [00:33:20] Ally: And even like when they're going in the ocean or something, the ocean's extremely cold. That's not going to be a great scenario to figure out.
  • [00:33:24] Mike: You don't have shrinkage, that's right.
  • [00:33:25] Ally: Yeah. And they're definitely not going to be erect.
  • [00:33:25] Mike: This is a problem.
  • [00:33:27] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:33:27] Mike: Look, this is just another one of the ways, I mean, it strikes me that this is just another one of the ways when when a woman is say like 22 years old, she has all the card she carries, has all the cards.
  • [00:33:35] Ally: Mmhmm. Mmhmm.
  • [00:33:39] Mike: And, but later in life, like it just switches. And this is just another way where it's like, you know, look, if you're a 22 year old woman and you're dating a 22 year old man, like he's going to be able to perform sexually almost certainly.
  • [00:33:48] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:33:48] Mike: so you don't even So you don't even think about this. This would not even be a consideration. It's just another one of these things like the fact that like later in life, women are more likely to want a kid and like families and the guys maybe could be more reticent about that.
  • [00:33:59] Mike: And so then they have more power in the relationship, et cetera, et cetera. these these various And also the, you know, when they're 22, the women are vastly more attractive than the men. But later in life, it's like, it's not, it's not as positive.
  • [00:34:10] Mike: And so this is just another like, yeah, you have all these millstones around your neck.
  • [00:34:10] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:34:13] Mike: Maybe you should become lesbian.
  • [00:34:16] Ally: I don't think that would solve any of that.
  • [00:34:18] Mike: There are some lesbians that could give you a pretty good rogering, I'll tell you, with a strap on.
  • [00:34:23] Ally: Oh, let me, like, if I'm willing to accept a strap-on, then, like, I could just have this guy wear a strap-on.
  • [00:34:28] Mike: That's not a bad idea.
  • [00:34:28] Ally: Which I've thought about.
  • [00:34:29] Mike: Have you considered that?
  • [00:34:30] Ally: I have thought about that. It seems like it might not be as satisfying, but
  • [00:34:35] Mike: Incredibly emasculating.
  • [00:34:36] Ally: you know i guess yeah I guess if he tries to get it fixed and it doesn't work, I could suggest that. So he's been really like open about you know asking me like what my sex drive is like and like you know how often I want to have sex and stuff like that.
  • [00:34:45] Mike: yeah
  • [00:34:49] Ally: And he seems like he wants to be very accommodating. And I was telling him that with my ex, like we didn't have sex as often as I would want because like he would be tired or like he would be like, oh, I'm more of like a morning sex person than an evening sex person in this new guy.
  • [00:35:01] Mike: Well, he was also gay, right?
  • [00:35:03] Ally: No, I don't think so.
  • [00:35:04] Mike: Oh, he wasn't gay? Okay. All right.
  • [00:35:06] Ally: um So this new guy was like, oh no, that's terrible. like I think that you know i think that i like ah the guy should never say no to his partner who wants sex, that like it's my responsibility to like in to like accommodate that.
  • [00:35:17] Mike: I mean, look, this is not good. It's not, you're already like, you're already like backed up against your own goal line. If the guy is saying things to you, like how often do you like to have sex?
  • [00:35:29] Mike: Like that's not the conversation you want to have as a woman. You want him to be exceeding the amount of sex you want. Like that would be the normal expectation as a woman, right?
  • [00:35:36] Ally: Well, yes, I do appreciate that he like cares and wants to meet.
  • [00:35:38] Mike: That's what you want.
  • [00:35:43] Mike: You want to be ravished. You want a guy that wants deeply to fuck you, right? Like that you can't get enough of you.
  • [00:35:46] Ally: Yeah. ah Yeah, yeah, and I don't know it's it's really hard to find that guy. Well, so one thing I was telling you too is like let's say that I decided that the best scenario is like I date this guy who is again it like extremely intellectual and like really compatible with me that way and then I also find some kind of like friend with benefits who will just fuck me the problem is how to find a guy like that who is regularly available and and physically attractive and so on.
  • [00:36:12] Ally: And like I don't know where those guys are.
  • [00:36:13] Mike: Right.
  • [00:36:14] Ally: Because I feel like the kind of guys who want to be friends with benefits or fuckboys are also the kinds of guys who are like, oh, I'm going to go off and take a two week trip to Belgium. you know And like I want somebody who's like available regularly.
  • [00:36:26] Mike: Yeah, or like Africa or, you know, Asia.
  • [00:36:29] Ally: I mean, that guy has other problems, which is he is does not disclose that he's operating with substandard lengthwise equipment, I assume.
  • [00:36:29] Mike: ah human
  • [00:36:36] Mike: Oh my God. Oh my God.
  • [00:36:37] Ally: Does he?
  • [00:36:38] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:36:38] Ally: Like, should he? I think he should. I think in his profile, Keith.
  • [00:36:40] Mike: Who are you talking about? No, Keith's fine. Keith is a modest sized penis. It's not substandard. It's fine.
  • [00:36:46] Ally: Okay. Okay.
  • [00:36:46] Mike: As far as I know, I don't want to, I don't want to go too far with that.
  • [00:36:47] Ally: All right.
  • [00:36:50] Mike: You're like, you should disclose. That's crazy.
  • [00:36:53] Ally: i think if it's below average in his profile he should just say like hey fair warning my dick is exactly this long like if that really matters to you you know because i mean it'll kind of put the woman on the defensive and it'll be like wow this guy's really honest and then like i'm not expecting something like this a lot you're very much enjoying
  • [00:36:53] Mike: No, no, no. I gotta, I gotta,
  • [00:37:06] Mike: All right. Well, I didn't say that.
  • [00:37:09] Mike: And I didn't say, I gotta stand up for Keith. My understanding is it's not at that level where one would need such a disclaimer.
  • [00:37:11] Ally: yeah
  • [00:37:15] Mike: Like I think you're talking, but but look, it's a fair question and that's something maybe you guys could investigate together.
  • [00:37:19] Ally: I'm saying everybody should disclose. I'm saying guys always put like how tall they are, and sometimes they put how much they weigh. like Why not?
  • [00:37:25] Mike: um I disclose, when I disclose my penis sites to people, they start laughing and they're like, don't believe me or something.
  • [00:37:30] Ally: o Well, right.
  • [00:37:31] Mike: Cause it's too big. so Yeah.
  • [00:37:34] Ally: I mean, then you know to the people you want to, you get to like prove it to them. I mean, I don't see that as a negative.
  • [00:37:39] Mike: and Not really, because you'd have to get a ruler, a tape measure, and like women aren't into that. So actually, I've never proven it to anybody, except myself.
  • [00:37:45] Ally: being Yeah, OK.
  • [00:37:47] Mike: So it's it's kind of boring. um Okay, so yeah, you you have you have like a real conundrum here that I don't. I mean, except you know maybe there's some listeners that... Oh, there's one other thing I want to say. You're describing in some ways, and I'd never thought of this either.
  • [00:38:00] Mike: I haven't thought about this much. The thing you're describing, the relationship you're describing is like a hot wife or um like a cuckold, right? Because basically, now okay, maybe maybe this guy would be into watching you get fucked by another guy, but that's like, this feels like the doorway to that.
  • [00:38:14] Ally: Oh, I doubt it.
  • [00:38:16] Mike: You doubt it. you know
  • [00:38:17] Ally: I doubt you. So he's fine with like you know us not being exclusive because, again, like it's very new. And like I want to take things slowly.
  • [00:38:23] Mike: ah Okay.
  • [00:38:24] Ally: I just broke up with this other guy like two months ago. you know and i So he's we've had that discussion where where I was like, I still want to like date other people. And he's like, yeah, that's fine. um He says he doesn't want to date other people.
  • [00:38:36] Ally: I don't know, whatever. um It doesn't really matter as long as I'm dating other people.
  • [00:38:38] Mike: Oh, it must be kind of hard for him because he's got this sort of flexible penis thing.
  • [00:38:42] Ally: I can't. Yeah.
  • [00:38:43] Mike: So it's tricky, but you don't think he would want to watch you get plowed by a large penis man.
  • [00:38:44] Ally: um
  • [00:38:48] Ally: No, and I don't think I don't think that long term this would be a viable solution. I guess what I'm trying to decide is like, you know, is there always going to be some trade off? Is it like either I can get good dick and a personality I don't really like or like the perfect personality and shitty dick and do I have to just like, or not shitty, I shouldn't say like, you know, as sub-optimals.
  • [00:39:11] Ally: Do I have to decide?
  • [00:39:11] Mike: You're okay.
  • [00:39:12] Ally: like is it Is this a trade-off I have to just like pick one side of?
  • [00:39:16] Mike: And I want to be very clear on this, that your plan then, even if you did sort of become exclusive with this guy, your plan would be to do this without telling him.
  • [00:39:24] Ally: No, my plan is to do this for now while we're not exclusive to figure out to figure out whether it really is something I need or whether it's just like you know coming out of a relationship.
  • [00:39:28] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:39:33] Ally: I just want to have a lot of sex right now, but it'll calm down or something. I don't know.
  • [00:39:38] Mike: Uh huh. Uh huh. This is such an,
  • [00:39:39] Ally: Like I also assume that at some point maybe in menopause, like my sex drive will decrease. And so should I like planning ahead for that, say like, okay, you know, the sex with this guy right now is not great, but like, eventually sex is going to be much less important to me. And what's going to be more important is that he's really funny and really smart. And we have great conversations, you know, like, should I optimize for that knowing down the line this might happen to me, you know?
  • [00:40:03] Mike: No, I don't think so. I think you should optimize for getting fucked hard in the present. And and I'm not just saying that because it's more more fun.
  • [00:40:09] Ally: ah okay well how do i do that yeah
  • [00:40:11] Mike: We got to work on that. I think we i think maybe our listeners can give us some some tips on that. I think that we've given, this is an interesting conundrum you've got, and and I want to reiterate the Because it let me just, i I know, because as a man, and I'm a lot like you, dear listeners, many of you, you're gonna assume, I know, that this is because there's something wrong with Ali, physically.
  • [00:40:33] Ally: Okay, well how do I do that?
  • [00:40:35] Mike: There is nothing wrong with Ali physically. It's not because of that. This is something else. This ah this is something about society. like shes She's trying to find the right big cock and vet that there's a big cock and that he'll do it the the right way.
  • [00:40:48] Mike: Even though there was this balding man, who I think has a reasonable cock and could have done it and she rejected him. So I mean, there is some, you know, she's selective as well. So it's a tricky situation. it's not This is not just like she's...
  • [00:40:58] Ally: Yeah. Well, that's also the guy the balding guy the last time that I hooked up with him. He had that hang up about not wanting to penetrate me. So I don't know if he still has that. And that's another you know wrinkle. I do find all these guys with fucking penis issues.
  • [00:41:08] Mike: Right.
  • [00:41:11] Mike: Right, right.
  • [00:41:12] Ally: Thank you for saying there's nothing wrong with me, by the way.
  • [00:41:13] Mike: Yeah, no, I just want to well, I know what they're thinking. They're going to think that like you're missing a leg or like they're you know, there's just some just thing we're not saying and there there isn't it's not like that.
  • [00:41:23] Ally: Thanks.
  • [00:41:24] Mike: Okay, so there's ah so
  • [00:41:24] Ally: I've lost something recently, too. I think I know look better. and so Oh, no.
  • [00:41:29] Mike: um there is a there is We have a listener that sent in an email, and by the way, people can email ymmvpod at gmail dot.com with feedback.
  • [00:41:33] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:41:37] Mike: I've been getting more of it lately, um that mentioned you. he said he Well, look, he just said he appreciate gen he generally appreciates your input when you're on the show, and then he said there's too many instances where we giggle and joke like we're 12 years old.
  • [00:41:51] Ally: Okay.
  • [00:41:51] Mike: and it diminishes the mature content we're involved in. He says to rein that in. I think I'm going to say no. No, we're not going to do that because it's trying to have fun. um He also wanted to know the Reddit
  • [00:42:02] Ally: He comes here just for information. He comes here for sober discussions of serious biophysical topics. He doesn't want us to enjoy what we're talking about.
  • [00:42:12] Mike: yeah so he also He also spelled the word a lot wrong, so I don't know.
  • [00:42:16] Ally: in
  • [00:42:17] Mike: he maybe Maybe he's not the sharpest tool in the shed. ah He's going to love that.
  • [00:42:21] Ally: he send a dick click did he attention
  • [00:42:24] Mike: He didn't. he didn't he's He's from the Midwest, I'll say that.
  • [00:42:24] Ally: like give okay
  • [00:42:28] Mike: so ah But from one of the states in the Midwest that I happen to like more than the others.
  • [00:42:33] Ally: Okay, so Illinois, I don't know.
  • [00:42:34] Mike: No, I don't like Illinois. It's too liberal.
  • [00:42:36] Ally: Oh, okay. Right, right, all right.
  • [00:42:37] Mike: ah Close though. I don't want to, I don't look, I don't want to dox anybody.
  • [00:42:41] Ally: Hang on.
  • [00:42:41] Mike: The, he asked what the name of the Reddit site that I started is. It's, and he liked to explore. it And I have to say that I have made it onto some of the main lists of and NSFW subreddits.
  • [00:42:52] Mike: I've got about 30,000 subscribers now.
  • [00:42:55] Ally: That's so strange.
  • [00:42:55] Mike: Excellent content. It's, it's, ah it's called curated amateur porn.
  • [00:42:56] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:42:59] Mike: If you just search that on Google, you'll immediately find it. And then, Hey, you can interact with me on Reddit if you really want to, if you want to. interspersed in the comments. I wanted to ask you regarding porn.
  • [00:43:06] Ally: Yeah. you know but on I went to that subreddit.
  • [00:43:08] Mike: Yeah.
  • [00:43:08] Ally: You titled one of the gifs after a Taylor Swift lyric, I want to point out.
  • [00:43:14] Mike: Yes, I did. and You're the only one who noticed that. Which one? Which one, Ali?
  • [00:43:19] Ally: The cat eye sharp enough to kill him.
  • [00:43:22] Mike: Yeah. how did you Did you immediately know that or did you have to search it?
  • [00:43:25] Ally: No, I immediately knew that.
  • [00:43:27] Mike: Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's obviously a Swifty.
  • [00:43:28] Ally: I'm familiar with her oeuvre.
  • [00:43:31] Mike: She did have cat eyes.
  • [00:43:32] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
  • [00:43:32] Mike: And i I was probably listening to that song at the time where I just listened to it. So it's true.
  • [00:43:36] Ally: ah Do you listen to it while you masturbate?
  • [00:43:37] Mike: I try.
  • [00:43:38] Ally: Is that the implication?
  • [00:43:40] Mike: No, no, I don't.
  • [00:43:40] Ally: Okay.
  • [00:43:41] Mike: I don't.
  • [00:43:41] Ally: Do you listen to anything?
  • [00:43:42] Mike: but i probably and and lord um well just so Just the audio from the porn.
  • [00:43:42] Ally: that
  • [00:43:47] Mike: No, like me you're asking if I listen to any music.
  • [00:43:48] Ally: right
  • [00:43:50] Mike: No, just just the audio.
  • [00:43:50] Ally: yeah okay
  • [00:43:52] Mike: ah from and but But like many men, and this is maybe not a well-known thing, the audio is actually pretty important. and So one of the things I do is I only post things I really do, only 99.9% of the time post to that subreddit things that have audio because a lot of the clips that get posted don't have audio, ah which is which I find sort of irritating.
  • [00:44:10] Ally: Mm.
  • [00:44:13] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:44:13] Mike: um so i So you don't consume very much porn, I know, right?
  • [00:44:17] Ally: No.
  • [00:44:18] Mike: Okay. Is it is part of the reason because you find you're grossed out by the women's genitals?
  • [00:44:24] Ally: No. um
  • [00:44:26] Mike: You sure? Because I could imagine that for women, it's like women don't necessarily want to see that. And it's like, it's just a lot of female genitals. And you're like, yeah.
  • [00:44:33] Ally: Oh, yeah, I wouldn't say I'm grossed out by it. It is not what turns me on. And I do find that a lot of porn is shot or filmed or whatever from a perspective that shows more of the vagina than of the cock.
  • [00:44:44] Ally: So that's true. But no, I don't watch that much porn because I find something I guess a little bit
  • [00:44:45] Mike: yeah
  • [00:44:52] Ally: seedy about it or like morally distasteful or something. And I feel like text-based stuff, which I do read like erotica, you know, um on other subreddits, you know, that does it for me enough that I feel like I don't need the additional visual stimulation and it feels more um proper, I guess, in some way, you know, like to just be reading something.
  • [00:45:14] Mike: you um Let me understand. so this is You're mad at these women, you think they should go get a real job.
  • [00:45:20] Ally: No, no, no.
  • [00:45:23] Mike: i see well that's what youre
  • [00:45:23] Ally: No, it's honestly my, no, no. My, like, I guess my view of masturbating is like, you know, this is not productive. Like, this is not necessarily shameful, but it's like, oh, this is something I'm doing, like, just because it feels good.
  • [00:45:36] Ally: And so, like, I don't want to, like, make a big production of it. And, um...
  • [00:45:43] Mike: That's different from saying that there's a moral issue with video porn, right? That's, that's just saying that you, Oh,
  • [00:45:47] Ally: No, the moral, the moral issue is all like reflecting on me. It's like, you know, what am I doing with my time?
  • [00:45:52] Mike: Oh, who cares?
  • [00:45:52] Ally: like What am I doing here? like
  • [00:45:54] Mike: Who cares? What do you think anybody does with their time? Nobody does anything.
  • [00:45:58] Ally: Yeah, I don't know. I care. I think this speaks to part of the reason we you were talking before about like the refractionary period and like you know how many times do you masturbate a day or in a session or something. like After I come, I feel like, OK, now I should do something worthwhile.
  • [00:46:12] Ally: like Now I should do something productive. It doesn't occur to me to just like lying lie in bed for another 10 minutes until I can come again or something.
  • [00:46:16] Mike: Go to sleep.
  • [00:46:21] Mike: All right.
  • [00:46:21] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:46:22] Mike: Yeah. you So you, you want to, yeah, you want to, okay. But that, so, so the point is that video porn to you feels like you're giving too much power to the masturbation or something. like So you would, but you would, do you, do you think you'd have a stronger orgasms or more enjoyable masturbation sessions with video porn?
  • [00:46:32] Ally: Yes, yeah, that's a good way.
  • [00:46:42] Ally: I think it makes it easier for me to get wet, but I don't think it makes the actual masturbating better because when I'm reading something, I'm imagining something that's like optimally hot.
  • [00:46:57] Ally: But when I'm seeing something, I'm just seeing whatever's there, it's really hard to imagine like, oh, but what if this guy were, you know, taller or not tattooed or something, you know, like you you can only see what's there. And I think that sometimes there are visual things that go against what I would ideally like and make it less.
  • [00:47:10] Mike: So that'll turn you back off.
  • [00:47:12] Ally: Yeah, a little.
  • [00:47:13] Mike: There's risk. do you Do you measure how route you are based on your wetness?
  • [00:47:14] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:47:17] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:47:17] Mike: I just asked because you said that. Really? Okay.
  • [00:47:18] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:47:19] Mike: So do you have levels that you think about? Like a trickle? ah A stream?
  • [00:47:24] Ally: No, not in that way. No, well, like, okay, so, like, the easiest way for me to masturbate is if I can, like, you know, stick a finger inside myself to get some wetness that I can then use to touch my clit.
  • [00:47:29] Mike: I just don't know.
  • [00:47:38] Ally: And so, like, if that is readily and copiously available versus if I have to like stick my finger pretty far in or like if I'm like not wet. So I guess there's kind of like three levels.
  • [00:47:49] Mike: But couldn't you use your mouth to give yourself wetness?
  • [00:47:53] Ally: Yeah, I could.
  • [00:47:55] Mike: It's less fun.
  • [00:47:56] Ally: but Yeah, and also like, i not that this is a huge concern or whatever, but like the wetness that comes from your vagina has like the same ah bacteria or whatever as like your genital area does, but like the wetness that comes from your mouth has like mouth bacteria.
  • [00:48:10] Ally: And so like I feel somewhat, and I know this is irrational, but I feel somewhat weird about like putting my mouth bacteria into my like genitals.
  • [00:48:15] Mike: That's really irrational.
  • [00:48:18] Mike: Oh, this is, this is the real reason you don't like oral from men is you have like a germ phobia.
  • [00:48:25] Ally: No.
  • [00:48:26] Mike: You're afraid they're going to put bacteria in your vagina. Did you once, like when you were in high school, did you get, did you get oral from a guy and get vaginal bacteriosis or were they called it that happened?
  • [00:48:29] Ally: Maybe it's not common for me.
  • [00:48:36] Ally: No.
  • [00:48:38] Mike: It was traumatic. Maybe traumatic yeast infection.
  • [00:48:41] Ally: I have had that once, but I don't know if it was from oral or not. um Maybe subconsciously that is it, yeah.
  • [00:48:45] Mike: Okay. Hmm. So you do you have like one hand you'll put in your mouth and one hand you put in your vagina, sort of like how people in some countries only.
  • [00:48:54] Ally: No, I don't put any hands on it. Oh, oh, oh, you mean like just generally. No, but like I do wash my hands after masturbating, but like I assume everything
  • [00:48:58] Mike: Yeah, you have your. your
  • [00:49:04] Mike: Not before.
  • [00:49:07] Ally: No.
  • [00:49:09] Mike: I don't think the men do.
  • [00:49:09] Ally: I guess that's inconsistent. Yeah.
  • [00:49:11] Mike: I don't think men do. I think men just spew their nut everywhere and then they just sort of wipe it up with a rag and throw it away and then it just got to come everywhere.
  • [00:49:14] Ally: I mean, don't.
  • [00:49:18] Ally: Don't wash their hands at all. Yeah, well.
  • [00:49:19] Mike: Oh no, because it's kind of a power move to like put your semen on somebody or in, right?
  • [00:49:20] Ally: Hmm.
  • [00:49:25] Mike: It's part of our, it's part of our deal.
  • [00:49:26] Ally: OK. Yeah.
  • [00:49:27] Mike: Um, okay.
  • [00:49:28] Ally: Do you feel like you smell your hands more after you've masturbated?
  • [00:49:29] Mike: Yeah, go ahead.
  • [00:49:33] Mike: No, because men's semen doesn't, it's less pungent than women's, that that's actually, a actually this is a fair point that you probably want to wash your hands because like it would, there'd be an odor, ah like a noticeable odor from a woman, right?
  • [00:49:47] Ally: I guess I do kind of worry about that. Yeah, that like if my hand smells like my vagina or something, like somebody would notice that.
  • [00:49:53] Mike: Yeah, for sure.
  • [00:49:54] Ally: But okay, so there have been studies where people do subconsciously smell their hands after they shake hands or whatever, like, because they want to like, kind of get the other person's volatiles.
  • [00:50:05] Ally: um
  • [00:50:05] Mike: I think people just like different smells. Like it's, it's, it a you know, it's just something interesting to, although I don't think I smell smell people's, my hands after I shake hands.
  • [00:50:08] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:50:14] Mike: Maybe I do.
  • [00:50:14] Ally: It's a conscious thing. They've done like you know video of internet of people's interactions to see like that people do sometimes. they they' like you know They'll like touch their face, and and it's assumed like that's because they want to like smell their hand. We never followed up either on Keith's experiment with Vabbing, where he said his partner was going to like put her pussy.
  • [00:50:31] Mike: He couldn't tell. No, we did he did.
  • [00:50:32] Ally: OK.
  • [00:50:33] Mike: He couldn't tell. He was unable to tell. All right, look, we have we have a little bit more time here. I've got a question that came in from a listener, a person's, well, they don't want their name set.
  • [00:50:43] Mike: So this listener, it's a little bit long and kind of gay.
  • [00:50:48] Ally: That's how I like it. Oh, no, not kind of yet, okay.
  • [00:50:50] Mike: No, it's kind of gay. um Yeah, but you don't even know if you like a big cock, because you've never had one.
  • [00:50:54] Ally: I know,
  • [00:50:57] Mike: have you What's the biggest cock you've ever had?
  • [00:50:57] Ally: I know.
  • [00:51:00] Mike: Well, did you have sex with a black guy?
  • [00:51:01] Ally: No, there was a guy in college.
  • [00:51:03] Mike: You've never had sex with a black guy?
  • [00:51:04] Ally: I've never had sex with a black guy. There was a guy in college who I think I've talked about.
  • [00:51:06] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:51:08] Ally: I think I've talked about this before. he He had the biggest cock that I've ever been with to the extent that like it was hard to fit it inside me. It was so big. um So that was too big, right? because like it wouldn't comfortably go in.
  • [00:51:19] Mike: yeah But I mean, with the BDSM thing, you'd probably like to have a guy like force it in this or tear you up inside.
  • [00:51:25] Ally: Maybe now I would.
  • [00:51:27] Mike: Hmm. Hmm.
  • [00:51:28] Ally: At the time, at like 17 or whatever, I didn't. But like, right, yeah.
  • [00:51:33] Mike: You could, what do they call that, rearrange your guts?
  • [00:51:38] Mike: Is that what you think in your head when someone's really giving it to you?
  • [00:51:40] Ally: No, I don't think that.
  • [00:51:41] Mike: He's rearranging my intestines, you don't think that. You probably think nothing, you're just like, oh yeah, I'm into this. You get jiggle fucked as you called it. Okay, let me read this guy's thing. He says, hi guys, I'd like to hear you discuss this thing I have. um Blah, blah, blah, lengthy description. Okay. I know most of us are biased towards ourselves. Sometimes I think my own bias toward myself goes to the extreme. Every now and then when I see some of my recent photos or see myself in the mirror, I get completely turned on and attracted to the person I see.
  • [00:52:08] Mike: It's a guy, by the way. It's completely involuntary and not something that I have to convince myself to believe. It just happens the same way I get instantly attacked into a beautiful woman that I see. It would make more sense if I was bisexual or gay or any other gender besides straight. It's not a gender but orientation. He's gay, by the way. But the thing is I'm not attracted to any other male person besides myself.
  • [00:52:28] Mike: So this makes it a weird phenomenon. I even imagined myself making love with attractive men. He's gay.
  • [00:52:33] Ally: He's gay.
  • [00:52:34] Mike: And watch, oh no, okay.
  • [00:52:34] Ally: Yeah, ah that's pretty gay.
  • [00:52:35] Mike: yeah And watched Gabe, no, he did it to see if he might be bisexual. He said neither of them turned him on. Okay, that was like a little tease there. Leading him to conclude conclude that he's straight or it's just gendered. Okay, just so he knows yeah, I know straight and cisgendered are not the same thing Just so this guy knows cisgendered means you have a penis you're born man And you're still ah or you're born a woman and you're still a woman in as in other words It's the opposite of trans and it comes from like chemistry.
  • [00:52:44] Ally: or
  • [00:52:58] Mike: There's like sis. You know this right Ali. What is it?
  • [00:53:00] Ally: yeah yeah
  • [00:53:01] Mike: Sis?
  • [00:53:01] Ally: bonds and trans bond yeah like
  • [00:53:02] Mike: molecules or Yeah
  • [00:53:03] Ally: If the functional groups are like on opposite sides of the main carbon-carbon bond, they're transits on the same. and
  • [00:53:08] Mike: Oh, that was pretty hot, what you said there. I don't know much chemistry, but um but yeah, that sounds right. ah So there you go. So it comes from that. Whereas straight means attracted to the people of the other gender, other sex. And then I don't want to talk about why guys fucking girl chicks with dicks or whatever that's separate. Okay. I even prefer girl and girl sex when it comes to porn because I tend to lose my arousal when the guy whips his cock out in heterosexual porn. Hmm.
  • [00:53:35] Mike: That's a little weird because usually guys imagine they are the cock. so Most guys watch heterosexual porn.
  • [00:53:39] Ally: Right.
  • [00:53:41] Mike: Anyway, as soon as a cock shows up on porn, I lose my erection almost immediately. Again, beyond my control. Nevertheless, there's one cock out there that gets me going whenever I see it, my own. All right.
  • [00:53:54] Mike: whenever i see Whenever I see certain photos of me or see myself in the mirror on certain occasions, thank God the arousal doesn't happen all the time or I would go insane.
  • [00:53:59] Ally: ah
  • [00:54:04] Mike: I just get out of my body. I just want to get out of my body and have sex with it. I want to eat myself and... Jesus Christ, dude, lick my body all over and even give myself a blow job.
  • [00:54:12] Ally: This is a weird form of gay.
  • [00:54:13] Mike: Sometimes I really wish...
  • [00:54:15] Ally: is This is gay, but it's like a specific subculture of gay.
  • [00:54:16] Mike: Yeah.
  • [00:54:18] Mike: Yeah. I wish there were, I could lick my own cock and balls. Sometimes I watch myself in the shower with a mirror and I get a boner from watching myself take a shower. I'm attracted. Okay. Blah, blah, blah. Okay. Once I tried one of those apps that turns into the opposite sex and OMG, my female version is so gorgeous.
  • [00:54:32] Mike: I would fuck her and eat her a pussy for hours. Okay. Sometimes I imagine what my pussy would look like if I had been born with one and how I would enjoy pleasing myself. If I had a pussy suffice it to say, I would just goes on and on.
  • [00:54:45] Mike: Okay.
  • [00:54:45] Ally: Maybe this guy is trans? i've
  • [00:54:48] Mike: I don't know if this is some twisted form of extreme narcissism. Yeah, but I have no control over it. So I just live with it. Uh, it'd be good to know if there are others that experienced this as well. He's all, he forgot to mention also that he's in his forties. He's been experiencing these desires since he was 15. Uh, and then he says he should have said penis instead of cock and his email and vulva instead of pussy. That's nice. Okay, look, uh, yeah, what do you think's wrong with this guy?
  • [00:55:16] Ally: Oh, God. I guess this is just like some kind of paraphilia, um
  • [00:55:23] Mike: define paraphilia.
  • [00:55:25] Ally: like a non-standard sexual proclivity, like a fetish.
  • [00:55:29] Mike: Mm hmm.
  • [00:55:30] Ally: um I don't know, it it does sound kind of gay, um but where he like, you know, he's only gay for one person and that's himself. But some people also accuse trans people of having this where they're like, you know, really attracted to themselves with a vagina or something and they call it autogenophilia.
  • [00:55:47] Ally: But it sounds like this guy does have autogenophilia. He may not be trans, but like that's the just like specific thing he has. um It seems
  • [00:55:57] Mike: Maybe it's because nobody will have sex with him, and so he like he's his only possible sex partner, and his brain has sort of like accepted that.
  • [00:56:05] Ally: Maybe.
  • [00:56:05] Mike: you know like So it's a coping mechanism.
  • [00:56:06] Ally: Yeah. I mean, starting at 15, it does seem like this would preclude having really good relationships because if he's looking at his partner and being like, man, I wish this were me, like that sounds shitty.
  • [00:56:19] Mike: It's true.
  • [00:56:20] Ally: I don't know.
  • [00:56:20] Mike: This might be made possible through...
  • [00:56:21] Ally: He doesn't say he's ever been attracted to like another person. Like has he ever been attracted to the woman that he's with like more than he's attracted to himself?
  • [00:56:30] Mike: ah It sounds like no, he's he's he's always more attracted himself and he wishes the woman was himself with a vagina, which is not
  • [00:56:32] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:56:37] Ally: Yeah, that's just kind of sad. I don't know.
  • [00:56:40] Mike: I mean, he probably could. Like, maybe this is some sort of like that. That might be the most telling thing. Maybe this is some sort of like extreme ethnic attachment. So like, let's say your family was descended from people in. ah You know, Poland or.
  • [00:56:54] Mike: Well, I don't know, whatever you know Italy, not some like terrible country like Turkey, but.
  • [00:56:59] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:56:59] Mike: um
  • [00:57:02] Mike: ah But but. Uh, I'm saying that as a joke as Ali has some Turkish blood in her. Um, but, uh, the, yeah, you, maybe, maybe he needs to be among people of his ethnicity.
  • [00:57:15] Mike: Like maybe he would be more attracted to a woman that was his sort of look more like his family or had a family resemblance.
  • [00:57:18] Ally: Yeah. Oh, yeah. So he doesn't say whether he's attracted to his family members who presumably are like the closest thing to this, right?
  • [00:57:27] Mike: Right. Exactly.
  • [00:57:29] Ally: but Yeah. Okay. So maybe it's some kind of like crypto incestual desire. Like he has a twin sister or something or like, I don't know.
  • [00:57:37] Mike: ah critic that of is that on is that my phone that's ring ah can't control their stop i think it was my wife's ipad making some ringing sounds the yeah i mean i don't i'm not sure what he could do and maybe this is i don't think this because it's you typically step stepmother stepsister porn it's not the porn is not biological sibling porn.
  • [00:57:40] Ally: Yeah. That's okay. Hmm.
  • [00:57:59] Mike: um I, yeah, I mean, I don't know. Like i I can, I mean, people do have an affinity for people that sort of look like them, right? We were discussing this last time.
  • [00:58:05] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
  • [00:58:07] Mike: ah So there's that possibility.
  • [00:58:07] Ally: Oh, do you think he should try to find porn of people who look a lot like him? Maybe.
  • [00:58:11] Mike: Or maybe, maybe find people that look a lot like him. I don't know. Maybe he's like some, maybe he's from like ah some unusual country where he just doesn't have
  • [00:58:14] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:58:17] Ally: Yeah, he should do 23andMe and just message everybody who's close to him and ask to meet up.
  • [00:58:21] Mike: That's true. All his, all his third cousins, you could actually consider that 23andMe could be a good dating pool for you. Like find a second cousin who actually you could find out the size of like your father's penis and then use that as an indication on 23.
  • [00:58:31] Ally: Hmm. Hmm.
  • [00:58:37] Mike: This would, yeah, no, that's not going to work.
  • [00:58:40] Ally: Is it that correlated?
  • [00:58:40] Mike: Big.
  • [00:58:42] Mike: Probably. I don't know.
  • [00:58:43] Ally: I don't know either.
  • [00:58:45] Mike: I don't know. I've wondered that before, you know, and they say that, uh, and I think this is true, that whether men are going to go bald is related to their maternal side. It's their X chromosome.
  • [00:58:55] Ally: Yeah.
  • [00:58:55] Mike: and I've wondered before whether penis size also is that way.
  • [00:58:56] Ally: and o Yeah.
  • [00:59:00] Mike: Uh,
  • [00:59:00] Ally: This would be really hard to find out. Maybe Kinsey has done something like this, do you think? I think there's data.
  • [00:59:06] Mike: well, those studies were done before there was good like genetic data. So I'm skeptical that they would.
  • [00:59:10] Ally: Yeah, but even just saying like, you know, father's penis size, son's penis size, like, is this the same?
  • [00:59:14] Mike: Yeah, I don't know. There there is like penis sizes cluster pretty tightly around the median, which makes it all the more surprising that you've had such difficulty getting the the heft that you require.
  • [00:59:26] Ally: I think I've just seen a variety, um but yeah.
  • [00:59:31] Mike: OK, do you ever do you ever would you would you ever do this? Would you? Because it makes more somewhat it could make more sense to me for a woman to for a woman to sexualize her own body. Like, is this something you could imagine doing?
  • [00:59:41] Ally: Oh, no, no.
  • [00:59:43] Mike: You find yourself disgusting or just, okay.
  • [00:59:45] Ally: Not disgusting, but like not ah yeah not sexually arousing at all. yeah
  • [00:59:50] Mike: do Do you find, I was reading on two X chromosomes the other day, you know, it's very often that women complain about sexualization of breasts because they talk about how you basically, you know,
  • [01:00:02] Mike: 99% of the time women touch their own breasts, it's non-sexual. And so to a woman, her breasts are pretty non-sexual. And so then it's irritating to them every time they do anything with their breasts in front of a man, it immediately is cast as sexual.
  • [01:00:09] Ally: Yeah. and
  • [01:00:14] Mike: Is that something you experience?
  • [01:00:16] Ally: I find breasts in general just like a little bit gross and sort of superfluous. like If I were not worried about attracting men, I would rather not have breasts and just have like a flat torso. um And similarly, like I don't find my vagina attractive. like If there's any part of my body that I find attractive, it's like you know my face or like my waist or something, you know like the sort of i less obviously sexual parts.
  • [01:00:43] Mike: Interesting. So, so your ideal would be to like find a partner, get married and then have a mastectomy and maybe a penis and and they have a penis split, put in like a, okay.
  • [01:00:49] Ally: so
  • [01:00:53] Ally: No, I don't want to have a penis put in. and i'm just saying like you know In the absence of any need to like ever satisfy a male gaze, I think my ideal body wouldn't have breasts, but like I understand breasts as functionally useful for attracting men.
  • [01:01:08] Mike: Right, right. do you would you Do you think there's any way that your desire to be ah dominated fucked like this by a guy could be turned around so that you could instead be the dominant one?
  • [01:01:21] Mike: Just in other words, is it just the absolute value of the level of dominance? It's important or do you need to be dominated? So could you like overcome this by pe finding guys that wanted to be pegged or something? Going to the local bondage club and like beating them up and
  • [01:01:30] Ally: No. No, I think I need to be dominated because I don't like weakness in men. And I feel like the kind of guy who wants to be pegged is too sensitive in other ways that I wouldn't like.
  • [01:01:44] Mike: Hmm. Hmm. Now I wonder whether there aren't a lot of women in your generation, generation, the millennial generation, I guess, uh, go through the generations of my mind that have this same situation where they just can't get a guy.
  • [01:01:52] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:01:58] Mike: Like the guys are just too effeminate. They've been feminized and they all have these penis problems.
  • [01:02:01] Ally: Possibly.
  • [01:02:04] Mike: They're not in good health, too much, uh, uh, packaged food, too little exercise. And so there's just all these women out there crying out for a dominant man to, and what is,
  • [01:02:13] Ally: Yeah. But didn't you show me that study last time that like penis sizes have increased in the past 70 years?
  • [01:02:14] Mike: Yeah.
  • [01:02:18] Mike: It's true. It's true. It's true. So the men's bodies are trying to do something about this, but they're maybe their behaviors are sabotaging it.
  • [01:02:24] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:02:27] Mike: What is the, if you could have a dominant guy ah like We should wrap up here and say but if you could have a dominant guy just for one night like a one-night stand or like you I know you're not you don't want to want to say okay, let's say it's the first encounter of a Friend with benefits and you're excited about it in that first encounter.
  • [01:02:41] Ally: um Yeah.
  • [01:02:47] Mike: What what do you want him to do to you?
  • [01:02:51] Mike: Like what position what position do you want him to put you in? What are you fantasizing about like what's that what and what is he gonna make you orgasm in that position like what's he gonna do to you?
  • [01:03:03] Ally: Yeah, I think he starts by maybe taking me by the shoulders and like throwing me down on the bed and then he gets on top.
  • [01:03:10] Mike: Are you facing him or facing away from him?
  • [01:03:12] Ally: I initially am facing him.
  • [01:03:14] Mike: Okay, he throws you down on your, and so you're on your back now.
  • [01:03:16] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:03:17] Mike: Okay, go on.
  • [01:03:18] Ally: I guess we're already naked. I don't know.
  • [01:03:21] Mike: All right.
  • [01:03:22] Ally: And he like gets on top of me. like takes both my arms and like pins my wrists above my head and i starts kissing me while he thrusts into me.
  • [01:03:30] Mike: Okay.
  • [01:03:34] Ally: um
  • [01:03:35] Mike: So he just, he just, there's no, there's no preliminaries. He just, just his dry penis just gets stuck in you.
  • [01:03:42] Ally: Yeah, I mean, I assume in this case like I would already be wet if he's done this.
  • [01:03:45] Mike: You're already a little aroused. So he, okay.
  • [01:03:46] Ally: Yeah. um And then...
  • [01:03:48] Mike: Does he take care of it? Does he sort of slip the head of the penis up and down to get a lubricate or does he just do it immediately?
  • [01:03:51] Ally: No. Yeah.
  • [01:03:53] Mike: So it's, so it could actually hurt a little bit.
  • [01:03:54] Ally: yeah um
  • [01:03:56] Mike: Okay. File it a little bit.
  • [01:03:57] Ally: And then, you know, I think after doing that for a minute or something, maybe he, i let's say, you know, pulls out, slaps me. um
  • [01:04:07] Mike: He pulls out and then slaps you.
  • [01:04:09] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:04:09] Mike: Does he slap you with his penis or with his hand?
  • [01:04:11] Ally: With his hand.
  • [01:04:12] Mike: So why did he pull out? Just to kind of ground himself so he can give you the slap?
  • [01:04:18] Ally: Yeah, or because he wants to like reposition me. Because like i I really like doggy style also. So at some point, I want him to like you know flip me over and push my head down into the pillow.
  • [01:04:26] Mike: Okay.
  • [01:04:27] Ally: and like I I question why you're having me describe this.
  • [01:04:28] Mike: So he throws you down on the bed, he starts
  • [01:04:32] Mike: He throws you down the bed. He starts fucking you missionary.
  • [01:04:35] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:04:35] Mike: Then he pulls out, slaps you and puts you into doggy style.
  • [01:04:35] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:04:38] Mike: And then what?
  • [01:04:39] Ally: Continues fucking me. um Slaps my ass a few times. um
  • [01:04:45] Mike: Okay.
  • [01:04:45] Ally: you know a I think he's like he's like pushing my head down to the pillow and like has my hair in his fist.
  • [01:04:52] Mike: So he's pushing, he's got your hair in a fist, but he's pushing you down. He's not pulling your head back.
  • [01:04:56] Ally: Right, yeah yeah.
  • [01:04:57] Mike: Okay. That's a little hard for the guy because he's got to kind of maintain his balance.
  • [01:04:59] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:05:00] Mike: Okay. So he's strong.
  • [01:05:01] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:05:02] Mike: like he's and He's athletic or something. So he's able to do that.
  • [01:05:04] Ally: Sure.
  • [01:05:05] Mike: What's he doing with his other hand? Is he holding your waist or something?
  • [01:05:08] Ally: Yeah, let's say he has like my hip or whatever in his hand or he's like you know using his other hand
  • [01:05:12] Mike: When you say your hip, you mean your ass, right?
  • [01:05:14] Ally: but might answer yeah
  • [01:05:15] Mike: Okay.
  • [01:05:15] Ally: um
  • [01:05:16] Mike: Okay. Hip is a euphemism for ass for women, I think.
  • [01:05:20] Ally: Well, like i mean like I mean, actually, like the hip bone. like
  • [01:05:23] Mike: Okay.
  • [01:05:23] Ally: ah
  • [01:05:24] Mike: Okay. And then it is that it? Does he then unload in you or is he, there's been no birth control here, which is fine. Cause you're, I know, I know.
  • [01:05:32] Ally: I have an IUD.
  • [01:05:34] Mike: Does he, does he, you so does he not now, does he drop his load?
  • [01:05:37] Ally: No, I think you should go on long.
  • [01:05:41] Mike: It should go longer. Okay. So what happens next? All right. All right. So he's, he's, he's, he's got your, by the hair, your face is down in the pillow.
  • [01:05:45] Ally: okay
  • [01:05:48] Mike: He's kind of, he's kind of pounding away at you. And then what is next? look, you could have a person listen to this and then they would know what you want. So this is useful, right? This is like a tutorial.
  • [01:05:59] Mike: Uh, and look at the men, the men who want to send in emails and say, and suggest that they might be a proper fit for you could, uh, and could, could use this as like, they can think to themselves, can I do this?
  • [01:06:06] Ally: Yeah, they're gonna be like comfortable.
  • [01:06:11] Mike: Am I capable of this? You also way have to be like in your mid to late forties to be like, right.
  • [01:06:16] Ally: Right.
  • [01:06:16] Mike: That's like the age range you want. So, okay. Even though yeah, Ali's younger, they consider really younger than that, that she likes a little older guy.
  • [01:06:18] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:06:21] Ally: Early 40s is fine too.
  • [01:06:21] Mike: Okay.
  • [01:06:22] Ally: Let's say like 40 and up.
  • [01:06:23] Mike: Okay.
  • [01:06:25] Ally: um
  • [01:06:25] Mike: Okay. So he's, he's pounding away and then what, what does he do next?
  • [01:06:30] Ally: um
  • [01:06:31] Mike: Are you sort of whimpering the whole time or is there sounds you're making?
  • [01:06:32] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:06:33] Mike: Okay. What does that sound like?
  • [01:06:36] Ally: Okay.
  • [01:06:37] Mike: You don't want to do that. Okay.
  • [01:06:39] Ally: So yeah. All right. So then let's say maybe he then like pulls out again, puts me over, like, you know, chokes me or puts his hand over my mouth. Maybe he says something about like, I'm being too loud.
  • [01:06:50] Ally: If I don't stop that, he's gonna have to like shove his cock down my throat. um Yeah.
  • [01:06:54] Mike: He flips you over. He's pulled out, obviously. He chokes you because you're being too loud. I like that.
  • [01:07:00] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:07:00] Mike: And then you you you shut up like a good little girl, right?
  • [01:07:03] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:07:04] Mike: Okay. And then what happens?
  • [01:07:06] Ally: I want to point out, you can see my hands. I can't see your hands.
  • [01:07:10] Mike: Jesus.
  • [01:07:11] Ally: No, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.
  • [01:07:13] Mike: jesus
  • [01:07:13] Ally: ah
  • [01:07:15] Mike: I hit my microphone. I pulled my hands up so fast. No, no, no, I'm not. I'm just trying to make good content for our listeners here.
  • [01:07:18] Ally: okay you You follow orders quickly.
  • [01:07:21] Mike: I could also listen, I could also listen back later. Um, so yeah, like I'm, I, I, you know, I'm 90% of our listeners are just me beating off, of course.
  • [01:07:24] Ally: Right. who's
  • [01:07:30] Ally: Right.
  • [01:07:30] Mike: Um, so you, in your mouth.
  • [01:07:31] Ally: no i'm just trying to like Now I'm just trying to kind of like you know hit all the the marks. like I do want to be choked. I do like you know maybe something about him spitting on my cheek because that was so much fun that one time that happened.
  • [01:07:43] Ally: um Not spitting in my mouth. I do want him to finish inside me, inside
  • [01:07:46] Mike: He's which inside inside your mouth or inside your vagina?
  • [01:07:50] Ally: my vagina. um And probably while I'm in some kind of like position that's a little bit uncomfortable for me. right like
  • [01:07:58] Mike: Get more.
  • [01:07:58] Ally: he's like holding me down in some way or he's like bent my legs up or you know something that's like a little bit.
  • [01:08:03] Mike: So you want to feel like he's force impregnating you.
  • [01:08:06] Ally: Not impregnating me, but like, yeah, I do want to feel like he's like forcing himself into me as deeply as possible, you know like trying to hit my cervix, that kind of thing.
  • [01:08:08] Mike: Well, trying to.
  • [01:08:12] Mike: Huh?
  • [01:08:15] Mike: Because that hurts a little, but you like that.
  • [01:08:17] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
  • [01:08:19] Mike: OK, and he's he's OK, so but you said he would choke you, tell you to be quiet and then stick his cock down your throat. Sorry, I missed.
  • [01:08:29] Ally: I don't know about like the um the order of operations here, because like there's a lot to you know have happen. But yeah, I would like all those things to happen at some point.
  • [01:08:35] Mike: Right.
  • [01:08:37] Ally: yeah
  • [01:08:38] Mike: OK, and then you want him to put you in a stress. position What's your favorite stress position to receive the ejaculate of a virile man?
  • [01:08:46] Ally: I really like having my hands pinned down. um Yeah, so something like that.
  • [01:08:50] Mike: OK. So you can't block it somehow, you're you're.
  • [01:08:56] Ally: But then you know I also like being on my desk. I don't know if you'd call it being on all fours or something. you know i'm in these So if it's possible, I guess maybe like we start with that, but then he like pulls my hands behind me so that my face is like you know shoved into the pillow.
  • [01:09:09] Ally: And I'm just like, my hands are, you know he's holding my hands like behind my back or something, but I'm still on my knees.
  • [01:09:12] Mike: Right.
  • [01:09:15] Ally: Does that make sense? as ah
  • [01:09:16] Mike: It does you you and you you, yeah.
  • [01:09:17] Ally: that
  • [01:09:18] Mike: And so your face is sort of forced down because you don't have anything to uphold up top of your body.
  • [01:09:20] Ally: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
  • [01:09:24] Mike: the You want, and you want him coming. I mean, there's this thing that this trope that happens in porn sometimes where like right when the guy's about to come, he'll move into a completely different position. You probably don't want that, right? You want him to finish, like get you into position and then kind of get himself over the edge.
  • [01:09:37] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
  • [01:09:38] Mike: And during none of this, are you going to orgasm?
  • [01:09:41] Ally: Yeah, no, probably not.
  • [01:09:43] Mike: So your sexual fantasy does not involve you orgasming.
  • [01:09:43] Ally: I mean, I will. Yeah, that's true. Is that bad?
  • [01:09:49] Mike: I don't know, we can discuss that maybe next time.
  • [01:09:51] Ally: Okay, yeah.
  • [01:09:52] Mike: um Look folks, this has been, I think i think ah i think um i think I'm now moist.
  • [01:10:02] Mike: um I have a trickle, of a little bit of wetness.
  • [01:10:04] Ally: Yeah. That guy who doesn't like us giggling about stuff is going to fucking hate this episode.
  • [01:10:08] Mike: Maybe. I think he was complaining more about Keith and me. I'm not sure. um Okay, so yeah, we'll we'll find out. Is Allie able to cure his her new lover's Peroni's disease?
  • [01:10:23] Mike: ah is she able to um Is she able to find a virile man to give her the rogering she deserves and needs?
  • [01:10:26] Ally: but i so and
  • [01:10:31] Mike: ah is she able to Are we able to figure out a way for women to find out the size of their potential partner's cocks before wasting time on them? ah Find out next time on on Your Mile, which may vary. ah In the meantime, if you have questions, comments, you can email us at ymmvpod at gmail dot.com. if you want if you think you're up to I think what we need, if you're if you think you're nobody's going to do this, but if you think you are a potential suitor seriously, I think we're going to need your your LinkedIn.
  • [01:10:58] Mike: and a and a dick pic, which is going to be really hard.
  • [01:10:59] Ally: And it looks like that.
  • [01:11:00] Mike: like No one's going to want to send ah an erect dick pic and LinkedIn, and you need to be like relatively local to the San Francisco Bay Area.
  • [01:11:00] Ally: Yeah. I don't know if you want it. Yeah. yeah
  • [01:11:06] Mike: But this is not actually a joke. like i mean If there was a legitimate guy, like I think Ali would, and you could then you could then maybe be on the show and um or at least talked about on the show.
  • [01:11:11] Ally: Yeah. but I'm not going to want to do this because they know that I'm immediately going to talk about their dick on the show.
  • [01:11:17] Mike: He's like, oh, yeah.
  • [01:11:22] Mike: there's that, or you could yeah they could potentially come on and talk about um how violent, how they took you to pound town.
  • [01:11:22] Ally: ill
  • [01:11:29] Ally: Yeah.
  • [01:11:30] Mike: If they did, I mean, that's a thing you might say they didn't. um Okay, well, that's we'll see we'll see where that heads. um And yeah, I mean, we we're we're out of time, but this has been episode 178 of Your Mileage May Very.
  • [01:11:43] Mike: Please but like and subscribe subscribe. And as we learned, you can subscribe but anonymously on YouTube.
  • [01:11:48] Ally: Right.
  • [01:11:49] Mike: Of course, yeah, so do that if you can or want to. ah And we will see you next time when your own mileage may vary.