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Episode 3: Is scrotum scent alluring, is ball smacking additive, anatomy, sleeping through a blow job.

Team YMMV | 5-2-2018 | 58:47

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Keith and Mike get deep into a conversation about testicles and more.

Episode Transcript

Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.

  • [0:23] Keith: hello and welcome to a podcast that finally has a name. And it is. Your mileage may vary. This is a show that takes an overly candid look at a variety of topics, almost all of which are sex related. I am Keith. My co host is Mike. And of course, this subject matter naturally leads us to occasionally finding ourselves in hot water. So for those will almost certainly offend we pre apologize.
  • [0:31] Keith: We have no rights to be covering these topics. We just wanted to create a podcast, and the subject matter is something we're both obsessed with. And so here we are.
  • [0:43] Keith: We'd love some feedback on the show. You can find us on Twitter at Y M M V pod, and you can email us at why M. M. V. Pollitt at gmail dot com. Why, mm, before your mileage may vary, of course,
  • [0:59] Keith: we have no idea if this content is even mildly compelling. So if you have an opinion, positive or negative would be really useful for us. We're also looking to have guests on the show, in particular ones who have some sort of interesting sexual issue. So if that's something you might be interested in Give us a shout.
  • [1:06] Keith: Our format so far has been to lift interesting topics from the sex and other related sub credits and to analyze them here
  • [1:16] Keith: we will be continuing with that scheme today. But before we get started Mike, how are you feeling about the name of this podcast?
  • [1:16] Keith: It
  • [1:28] Mike: was It's ah been a long, strange trip long and winding road to get a name. And I'll say that the thing that made it the hardest is that when you're trying to name of hot gas like this, you come up with names
  • [1:36] Mike: and you search them. And of course, they're all taken. But also they always inevitably lead you back. Thio Pornhub.
  • [1:49] Mike: And each time you get there, it's at least 30 to 60 minutes. Ah, spent. So it just took a really long time to sort of break out of the orbit of that website and and keep researching. But we finally found something that we think works. I'm pretty happy.
  • [1:52] Keith: Yeah, it's sufficiently vague
  • [2:03] Keith: but provocative enough to be mildly interesting. I guess it is crazy how just every single thing was taken like I thought we had it with night moves. I thought that was gonna be it. But there
  • [2:10] Mike: was, like, two Canadian guys that it's that had grabbed that name like, uh, two months ago. So props to them.
  • [2:15] Keith: Good job, guys. Uh, I have another question for you.
  • [2:21] Keith: Where is the toilet paper? At your house in Tahoe.
  • [2:33] Keith: Uh, it's not in the bathroom. Well, there was There was 1/2 roll when I arrived, and I've been here for a few days, so, uh,
  • [2:34] Keith: I think
  • [2:42] Mike: so. The the other side of that. I mean, if you really want to know, the other side of the island in the kitchen is like a set of cabinets, and I think it might be in there.
  • [2:43] Keith: Okay, all right. Meets their
  • [2:46] Mike: paper towels. And I know it'll scratchy, but
  • [2:50] Keith: yeah. I mean, I actually I have found paper towels, but
  • [2:55] Keith: yeah, so, anyway, shall we get started?
  • [3:00] Keith: Uh, would you like me to read the first topic, or do you want to do it?
  • [3:02] Mike: Now? You can You can hit it off.
  • [3:19] Keith: Okay, So this is from somebody on Reddit named cats and burgers. Ah, and she says, uh, wait, no, This is a He says my 26 year old girlfriend really like smelling my balls? And this guy is apparently 23.
  • [3:35] Keith: I'm mostly just curious if other girls do this. My girlfriend really like smelling my balls. She loves it. Sometimes before we have sex or before she starts giving me a blow job, she'll just stick her nose right on my pulse and stiffed them heavily on Make that Ah send people make when they do that. She especially likes doing this after
  • [3:39] Keith: I haven't showered yet. She likes them. Quote unquote right.
  • [3:52] Keith: She she mentioned that she wishes she could have, like an air fresher that was scented. Like my balls doesn't bother me, and I do think it's a little funny. I'm just curious if it's a common thing or not. Thanks, Smiley face,
  • [3:56] Mike: What do you do? You think this is a common thing? I'm not sure.
  • [4:06] Keith: Um, I do not think this is a common thing. I have not. I have been in several circumstances whereby a woman enjoys the way smell, but not in that area.
  • [4:10] Mike: Okay, let me ask you this, though. Do you ever Ah,
  • [4:20] Mike: let's see the let's let's let's reverse the roles here. Would you ever Ah, sort of smell a woman in that way and be sort of happy about that.
  • [4:24] Keith: You know, it's a little bit tricky because, uh,
  • [4:33] Keith: the male brain really does a lot of work to sort of purify the female body S o.
  • [4:48] Keith: You know, you'll see things where people are like, Oh, you know, I would eat the corn out of her turd. She's so hot wearing that more. What was that? You haven't seen that, like, you know, it'll be like a picture of someone. And in the comments, somebody will say like, Yeah, she's so hot. Like, you know, I would drink,
  • [4:58] Keith: you know, the you know, the booty juice out of her, you know, wetsuit booties or I would you eat the corn out of her out of her poops? You haven't seen that trope
  • [5:09] Mike: the booty juice out of her wetsuit, but I have seen that there's like, I think feel like this is a line that a rapper said that Ah, she's so hot. I would suck her dad's dick.
  • [5:31] Keith: Yeah, Look, this is all sorts of things is all sort of along the same thing whereby, like people will do insane things now being willing to do something in order to presumably have some sort of sexual encounter is different from actually wanting to do that thing. And it appears that this girl enjoys selling this guy's sort of three day old sweaty balls.
  • [5:45] Mike: Yeah, but but the thing s o u, I think it was an interesting line you were going on there. Which is this notion of, like, purifying? Yes, right. So So carry on with that. More like what? What's going on? There is Does this relate to like? And maybe you could describe for the audience,
  • [5:54] Mike: cause I think there's a relationship here between the experience that you and I agree. You you you sort of turned me on to this. And I've had the same experience. Like what? So let me ask it this way
  • [6:10] Mike: when you're walking behind a lady who's say five foot five long black hair Seems very thin. Very nice, tight ass. What do you What do you assume? You don't You have never seen her face. You never seen her front at all. What you assume about her, you
  • [6:13] Keith: assume the faces perfect. Basically.
  • [6:28] Mike: Okay. And what percentage of the time would you say? So what do you? Okay, So tell me, what actions do you take it as a normal. And maybe women are 11 female listener eyes not aware of this. Ah, phenomenal. What actions do you take once you you're confronted with this
  • [6:36] Mike: this difficult situation that could arise on the way to work? Or maybe you're in a real big hurry. But the situation arises. What actions do you take next? As a man,
  • [6:41] Keith: I do everything in my power to get around to the front, so I couldn't see the face.
  • [6:44] Mike: Right. So, like you, you'll speed up.
  • [6:48] Mike: You'll try to be clever and cut corners like other things.
  • [6:57] Keith: Yes. Say something loudly that might draw their attention, whatever it takes. Do you actually do that? No, I don't. But I could imagine a circumstance where by
  • [7:03] Keith: you could pretend to be like, hey, and then, like, pretend you didn't say it. Actually, this wouldn't work. This is why I haven't done it. But
  • [7:05] Mike: yeah, you are throwing small pebbles
  • [7:07] Keith: at her
  • [7:09] Keith: whistle and looked the other way
  • [7:12] Keith: anyway. Yeah, it it becomes a focus,
  • [7:17] Mike: Okay. And what percentage of the time? I mean, how does it go when? When you finally turn that corner, you make
  • [7:18] Keith: it.
  • [7:21] Keith: It's almost always disappointing,
  • [7:24] Keith: is it? Now, let me ask you this question. Is it almost always disappointing,
  • [7:26] Mike: or is it always disappointed?
  • [7:28] Mike: Huh?
  • [7:28] Mike: Because
  • [7:36] Keith: it might be always because Because I'm basically projecting. Ah, you know, a 10 face perfection, right? And from the back, if you think about it
  • [7:38] Mike: from the back.
  • [7:46] Mike: And this is something that I think women are Women are very attuned. Thio, Uh, I can't stereotype totally here, but many women are very attuned to Ah,
  • [7:56] Mike: um, fashion and howto sort of put their best foot forward from the back. A woman can really you know, pretty much control what they look like, right? Am I
  • [7:58] Keith: right? That could be They can appear effectively flawless.
  • [8:08] Mike: Yes. And so that means your brain is going to as you said, You know, just presume that Ah, in this case is not the carpets matching the drapes. But Thea,
  • [8:10] Mike: I'm not sure what to say. The hood matching the
  • [8:25] Keith: trunk? Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know what the right phrase ology there is, but yeah, I mean, it's you know, it's the same thing with sunglasses to like, If you see like a blonde and sunglasses, it's like basically game over like you just assume they're they're perfect.
  • [8:36] Keith: So you had. This comes up a lot on, like online dating sites whereby you know someone will have four pictures and, you know three of them are in sunglasses and one is silhouetted or something. It's like, Well,
  • [8:38] Keith: I don't know if I should be making decisions based on this
  • [8:43] Mike: right. And of course, I mean, the most important thing possible is the exact shape of a person's face
  • [8:49] Mike: thieves to the superficial man, which is all of us. Oh,
  • [8:55] Keith: I mean, most of them don't even put anything in their profiles anyway. So you know, it's hard to be irritated by
  • [8:57] Keith: people being vain.
  • [8:58] Mike: Most men or women, most
  • [9:04] Keith: women. How it depends if they see from women, is ends on age. And you know, all kinds of
  • [9:04] Keith: I
  • [9:07] Mike: usually see something warding off,
  • [9:16] Mike: warding off many one hook ups, right? It's always like some sort of a chastity statement in their in their profile, not always, but very frequently.
  • [9:24] Keith: Many have something like that. Some people just say, Hey, I'm just looking to have fun, which is, of course, a euphemism for a one night stand. That's is saying, saying
  • [9:33] Mike: in your dating profile that you're looking to have fun is basically somebody who just wants to participate in that mean Which is the girl, the pretty girl whose face just gets inundated by a bunch of hot dogs,
  • [9:39] Keith: right? Yeah. I mean, if somebody has that in their profile, I just can't imagine the volume of interest they get.
  • [9:46] Mike: Well, you could. I mean, you could actually create a fake female dating profile and see it, but I I have no doubt in my mind of what would happen.
  • [9:55] Keith: Yeah, at some point. Like how do you tell the difference between, like, 1000 people interested in 10,000 would just be, like, effectively infinite. Actually, I do wonder if
  • [10:02] Keith: I bet even if you're like, hey, I'm looking for a very serious relationship and you're above a certain attractiveness level. It's It's effectively the same.
  • [10:09] Keith: Look, I'm not sure putting the line. Hey, guys, you know, I'm looking for serious romance on Lee.
  • [10:13] Keith: I'm not sure that would be enough to even
  • [10:14] Keith: curb it a little bit.
  • [10:32] Mike: I see what you're saying because guys basically Ah, and I think this is the right decision From what I understand of things like tinder, I mean and Bumble is is basically the right thing For a guy to do is to just pretend like the line that says they don't interested. They're not interested in hookups. Just pretend that line's not there, right? That's that's the standard move, right?
  • [10:34] Keith: Yeah. I mean, because
  • [10:40] Mike: we have to do with that. I mean, obviously, every every relationship starts is a hookup on some level.
  • [10:52] Mike: That's that's correct. There we go. So look, so okay, So you're saying that you have this notion that the male brain wants to kind of clean up the situation.
  • [11:16] Mike: Ah, and I think this applies to the situation where you're behind a woman who's very well put together, but you're not sure what the front, which is less controllable, looks like. How do you think that relates to the topic at hand, though, when you when the tables are turned, it's not the sweaty nuts that are ah, at issue, but the female of body part.
  • [11:17] Mike: How do you think
  • [11:19] Keith: about
  • [11:20] Keith: Ah,
  • [11:31] Keith: I think initially it's like, you know Basically, it's like a nexus of attractiveness, like you're very interested in it, and you want to get to know it is closely as possible.
  • [11:33] Mike: But would you be like this
  • [11:43] Mike: guy's girlfriend and tell your girlfriend or your hook up or your tinder date? Hey, uh, I would just love a perfume that smells like your badge.
  • [11:46] Keith: Yeah, I'm not sure. I wonder if you wouldn't say
  • [11:48] Mike: that, of course, because she be grossed out. But would you think it? Yeah,
  • [11:55] Keith: like, let's say it's Ah, who? Somebody that I think it's like hyper attractive. Uh,
  • [12:04] Keith: I'm like drawing a blank here. Let's Let's say it. Let's say it's a Tenet's. It's, you know, 25 year old Natalie Portman, and I don't agree
  • [12:06] Mike: with that being attended. Go on. Yeah.
  • [12:10] Keith: Okay. Well, you know, for whoever you want it to be for yourself, you can have that.
  • [12:14] Mike: I can't. I can't forgive her for the Star Wars prequels. Go on.
  • [12:20] Keith: Yeah, those weren't good, but she looked good in them, so Okay. Yeah, I'm not sure
  • [12:22] Keith: if
  • [12:29] Keith: her making it extra funky on purpose would be
  • [12:40] Keith: I'm not sure if I would care much. I don't think it would be added if I don't think it would help the situation. Like this girl seems to think it is like I think this guy says, like specifically, she likes doing it before I've showered.
  • [12:58] Mike: Yeah, but I think Okay, you're missing, like, the major point of what I'm trying to interrogate you, like Go on. Would you ever Would you ever or have you ever with a woman in this kind of situation ever kind of gone down there and, like, done this action that he did? She does, Apparently, which is to sort of smell it and be like, Mm.
  • [13:03] Mike: Yeah, definitely. Oh, you do do that. Oh, yeah. Is that is that a standard? Go to Keith. Move.
  • [13:13] Keith: No, I mean, I I actually find that alluring and attractive. Now, I I don't think it's more attractive if it's I think it's less attractive if it's less clean.
  • [13:15] Keith: Uh, but
  • [13:19] Mike: yeah, but you actually will head downtown there and
  • [13:26] Mike: and do kind of like the kind of thing. Maybe somebody who's cooking. Ah, nice batch of chocolate chip cookies in heaven. Will you actually go
  • [13:29] Keith: down like a pasta sauce? They get in there.
  • [13:30] Keith: If
  • [13:36] Mike: will you put your finger in and sort of like, taste it too. And I think this is going to be This is tasty. Do that to
  • [13:38] Keith: that has happened in my life. Yes.
  • [13:41] Mike: So, yes, you do that. That's one of your moves. This is sort of Okay, that's cool.
  • [13:50] Keith: It's not a move, though. I'm not doing it for her. Well, I mean, I could imagine a situation where I would where I would like, simulate being really interested in her.
  • [13:55] Keith: Why would I Why would I want to do that, though? Like,
  • [13:58] Keith: why would I want to simulate interest if I'm not interested?
  • [13:59] Keith: Uh, no.
  • [14:02] Mike: No, I'm not suggesting that would be a simulation.
  • [14:23] Mike: I mean, yeah, like you're the point is, though, like you, like you can actually understand. And may be many men or most men can understand the feeling this woman is. So in other words, the thing that's going on in this question is really the guy is weird out because he's thinking, Well, this is not the way that I expect women to behave. Not like I can't understand at all why a person would find this compelling.
  • [14:28] Keith: No, it's the difference. Here is
  • [14:37] Keith: listen like the musk that comes off of, like, you know, female and male genitalia. I think too many people eyes attractive.
  • [14:46] Keith: Um, what's weird about this particular situation is that this girl is encouraging him to make it extra funky.
  • [15:00] Keith: Maybe that isn't weird. Like I see where you're going with this. But that extra funkiness, I'm not sure. I'm pretty sure that doesn't add to the attraction. And it seems to me like it could be a pretty risky proposition.
  • [15:01] Keith: Well, I think
  • [15:10] Mike: I think that I think there you have a gendered economy because I think that the risk
  • [15:31] Mike: Let's get your take on this. What do you think? Like, let's say Okay, let's say you took a man and a woman and you did not let either one shower or Clunes their body for other than using toilet paper for their butt. Ever say three days? Do you? Who do you think presents the bigger olfactory risk, the man or the woman? After that, I'm I'm thinking it's the woman
  • [15:38] Mike: that presents the bigger risk to a man going down there and smelling. In other words, I think, and the reason I think that is there some sort of like a
  • [15:41] Mike: combination involving urine
  • [15:42] Mike: that I think, uh
  • [15:44] Mike: ah
  • [15:46] Mike: just doesn't seem doesn't sit right with me.
  • [15:48] Keith: God,
  • [15:58] Keith: you think because you know, this is more than some splash on the labia that accumulates, you know, sort of bacteria over over these three days. Not
  • [16:03] Mike: bacteria, but just sort of like, you know, chemical resident.
  • [16:13] Keith: I think it's bacteria. I think it you know, it it starts to sort of sterile. And then, you know, various microchips
  • [16:19] Keith: hold that job and then that creates, like, you know, some extra funk.
  • [16:22] Mike: You're in half physiologist years. I can't. I can't.
  • [16:29] Keith: Yeah. By the way, if someone wants to join the show, it's at White and iPod on Twitter.
  • [16:30] Keith: Yeah, perfect
  • [16:34] Mike: time to advertise that you liked while we're talking about piss
  • [16:37] Mike: jump on in, folks.
  • [16:37] Mike: I
  • [16:49] Keith: guess my intuition is the same, but I'm not quite sure why. And I worried. I'm not worried. I just suspect that there might be some bias toe like, naturally. Now I think,
  • [16:59] Keith: Yeah, there's There's just like a larger orifice there. And there's more going on that I think could be improved by regular cleaning. There's a
  • [17:13] Mike: counter a minute dinner. There's a counter argument, which I see Ah, woman making, which is some notion of, like the amount of discharge and and fluid going on. They're sort of somehow cleans it out. And so therefore, it actually would better.
  • [17:13] Mike: Yeah,
  • [17:18] Keith: that might be true. Like like a mouth that has lots of saliva is probably cleaner than one that doesn't
  • [17:29] Keith: that I can't even tolerate, right? I think so. Gross to me way haven't touched on the subject of this. Let's let's let's let's hold off on a toothbrush. Topic sharing. I
  • [17:34] Mike: can't drink out of the out of other people's glasses like I can, but I'm not a big fan of it. We'll
  • [17:42] Keith: get there someday. But conceptually, you understand that that that that saliva is, you know, an antibacterial itself. Yeah, there's there's a benefit there. I
  • [17:45] Mike: know the people that do a lot of meth wind up with some cavities.
  • [17:49] Keith: What would happen? Let's say
  • [17:53] Keith: right, right? Okay, let's say let's say a man
  • [18:04] Keith: shaves his armpits. So you know, a man and a woman both have shaved armpits, and it's like three days of, you know, not showering. Would you expect there to be a material difference and like how gross it is under there?
  • [18:06] Mike: No, I think it's exactly the same.
  • [18:11] Keith: Okay, Yeah, I do, too. So it's really just the, um,
  • [18:27] Keith: or at least, you know, corresponding toe like amount of sweat, discharged or whatever. Like the man might have a little bit more sweat just because he sweats more something. But normalizing for that, I think, would be the same. Okay, so then related. Okay, go on. Yeah. So then down there, like, really the only difference? Yeah, there's no difference in, like
  • [18:35] Keith: secretion of sweat or anything like that. Like the only difference is like sort of what's going on in the genitalia itself for controlling the scent.
  • [18:43] Mike: There's another thing. There's another thing here, which is, and I have a whole parade in. I could do about this. This topic. If people want to hear it some point.
  • [18:52] Mike: The big thing here, another big thing here is that there's not. It's pretty hard to see why people would be attracted to a guy's nuts,
  • [19:07] Mike: like there's just there's not a whole lot of their toe like get a benefit out of right. I mean your your Penis for the woman can be, you know, exactly serve effectively as a dildo, right? I mean, it does something right? It has. It has a a function to perform
  • [19:10] Mike: The woman's genitals obviously have a function to perform,
  • [19:14] Mike: to provide the man with pleasure. But the nuts, the nuts just don't do anything.
  • [19:33] Keith: It's good that you brought this up because that's another one of our topics. I'm actually just gonna really, really quick visit short hit him. But this this guy says, Ladies, is it hot to feel a guy's balls smacking against you when he pounds hard? And he says, Basically, the title Is it hot in any way? Does it gross anyone out? Or do you pay no attention at all? And
  • [19:46] Keith: just a couple of the comments here talk about like the second most devoted one here is I love during doggy style. When they smack my clit, it can get me off sometimes. So there's,
  • [19:51] Keith: uh, yeah, I mean, right, right. There is a time when when the balls are are
  • [20:02] Keith: the truck and then another one here says, way hotter than has any right to be considering what it is on the anatomical anatomical level. I agree like my intuition is, I don't get why they're attractive. But anyway, I wanted to interject that. So go on. Yeah,
  • [20:27] Mike: there's an irony with that question and one of the reasons that it's well, there's a There's a thing that I find humorous. I think deeply about these topics, and I'm sure all of both our listeners appreciate that. Ah, one of the ironies with that is that, of course, as everyone knows the man's balls, his nuts, they sort of tighten up as he's getting close toe his climax. Which means that if a woman really gets into that feeling,
  • [20:40] Mike: there's like this inverse thing that happens that as he gets closer and closer, she's getting further and further because that great feeling she's getting is being taken away from her is is not sort of tighten up. In other words, you need a pretty loose of nuts. Still, like accomplish this,
  • [20:43] Mike: this sensation that they're clean,
  • [20:49] Keith: already feel or a caring man that is willing to ah, you know, forgo his own pleasure long enough. Do
  • [20:51] Mike: you think that way?
  • [20:58] Mike: Are you suggesting you think that you have that there's some mechanism a guy could use to keep his nuts sort of flew. Swell. He's fucking,
  • [21:04] Keith: uh, you know, I don't know. We could think about other things. E sure.
  • [21:10] Mike: I don't think that's how that works. Like actually, now that this this could call for some further research. But, like, I don't
  • [21:21] Mike: I don't know if that's how that works, like, can you? I'm not sure that there's any conscious way that you can control the looseness or tightness of your nuts. I just think the like. As you get closer, they get tighter.
  • [21:33] Keith: If you noticed when you look at your nuts, like if I like, look at them, I can actually see them like, sort of shrivel up or come down like in real time, like just from looking at them. And I'm not sure exactly what's going on there. If I'm sure you've noticed this,
  • [21:37] Mike: sure, sure, but I don't think it's because you're looking at them. I think it's happening all the time.
  • [21:39] Keith: Yeah, they almost like breathe.
  • [21:43] Mike: I think it is like some sort of adjustment to temperature, but I don't I don't know the details.
  • [21:46] Keith: Oh, yeah, and if I'm looking at them, there's probably been a recent change in temperature.
  • [21:55] Mike: And also not a natale a gist or what even would that be? A Vegas? It's a urologist. It's a type of urologist. Yeah,
  • [22:10] Mike: but so so Looks. Okay. So aside. Yes. Good job. You've found the corner case where a the nuts could be. And of course, if you're trying to get pregnant, the nuts are relevant to that, too. But what I'm saying is like, this is almost a non sexual organ attached the man.
  • [22:14] Mike: Ah. And so therefore, when you're talking about smelling it,
  • [22:18] Mike: I mean, it's just not like if there is an equivalence there between
  • [22:21] Keith: knowing that it's not in my armpit. Hold on.
  • [22:32] Keith: Do Does the balls or Penis area emit some different kind of musk than, say, the armpit? I think yes,
  • [22:34] Mike: I think it would be sort of similar, right,
  • [22:35] Mike: although
  • [22:37] Keith: year. But
  • [22:48] Keith: I bet it's a bet. It's different. Sort of like how? Well, you know, pubic hair run the Penis and pubic hair in the armpit is similar, but different.
  • [22:54] Keith: Is it Is it a difference? I guess I don't know. Yeah, well,
  • [22:55] Keith: I mean, I think that
  • [23:01] Mike: if I, like, clipped off some hairs from each region and like, ask you to do like a test. You couldn't tell me which was which.
  • [23:03] Keith: I bet I could
  • [23:07] Keith: if I if I could train first.
  • [23:13] Mike: How about this? If we have a listener, they could tweet us a picture of a pubic hair in an armpit hair. And you can try to tell them which is which.
  • [23:18] Keith: All right, that's Ah, that's a good idea. That's at Y m and the pod on Twitter
  • [23:26] Keith: because he wants to make sure to get those pictures right, Right? Right. And you know, if you're uncomfortable sharing it publicly, you Can you condemn us?
  • [23:35] Keith: Really? I'm not sure I know, but do you understand what I'm asking the question? Like, I think there is some sort of musky scent that comes from down there. What is causing that?
  • [23:37] Keith: Is it just from, like various discharge?
  • [23:45] Mike: I think it's I think it's the same thing is your armpit. I think it's like bacteria and other, and I think you kill it through using, like, isopropyl alcohol or something.
  • [23:46] Keith: But
  • [23:52] Keith: this girl presumably would not be as turned on sniffing this guy's armpit.
  • [23:56] Mike: Yeah, yeah, I mean, but Well, there's no you don't know Do
  • [23:59] Keith: you think the scent is the same?
  • [24:13] Keith: God, I mean, it's okay for starters. Let's start with women like you agree that the scent is different for a women's armpit and a woman's, you know, taint, right? They don't really have a taint. That's a very small what is actually actually saw a
  • [24:24] Mike: really good I saw a really good thing on Reddit a couple weeks ago because you don't think about this very much as a man. Women might. Women might, I don't know, but
  • [24:32] Mike: because, like when you see a woman's body one of the things you notice, Uh, first off, it's like that. The fact that there's no Penis there, right?
  • [24:37] Keith: You claim this. I generally get it. I guess
  • [24:45] Mike: you don't notice. You don't immediately notice that there's like a like because you, most of your life, when you look in another person, you're looking yourself, right?
  • [24:49] Keith: Yeah. I mean, when I look at a woman, I surely
  • [24:55] Keith: understand that there's not a Penis there, but I don't consciously think like, Oh, there's no peanuts there,
  • [24:56] Keith: So you notice isn't really the right word.
  • [25:07] Mike: Okay, but the point is like the point I'm trying to make. Is that like it? Let's say she's naked. You would note something about the pelvic region of her body, right?
  • [25:10] Mike: No, you look elsewhere.
  • [25:11] Mike: Ah,
  • [25:13] Mike: I mean, you also look elsewhere, but I'm saying, like you don't
  • [25:18] Keith: Yeah, Yeah, I do. Look there, and it's good that there's stuff Penis there.
  • [25:25] Mike: Okay, But you don't. Okay, that's interesting. I think many, maybe most men find the lack of a Penis is like its own source and center of attraction.
  • [25:40] Keith: But I wouldn't say a couple more things here. So first there's, like, the sort of famous experiment where, like, they do, like eyeball tracking for women looking at baseball players and men looking at baseball players and, like men focus on the crotch like a lot more than when they do for us, right? It's important, right? So
  • [25:43] Mike: it's known for whatever reason is because we want to see if there's a dick there,
  • [25:48] Keith: right? Well, I mean, you know there is, but Okay, whatever. So I'm conceding
  • [25:55] Mike: that our brains aren't sure our brains are very complex thinking sweet way to know. Each time we see a human, we have to say, Can I fuck that?
  • [25:59] Keith: But it's a baseball player like Okay, whatever. All right. So you think that because that's like
  • [26:03] Mike: a higher level function to know it's a baseball player, but go on you.
  • [26:33] Keith: Yeah. Um, and then the second thing is like, Yeah, there's something about like, for example, yoga pants that is, like, super alluring. And it's not just that the ass looks better, like there's something in the front two. And I suspect this is related to your hypothesis that, like like it confirms, ah, lack of Penis or the existence of a vagina. But yeah, it on that So much Sure, it's the lack of a Penis. It's more that like, Yeah, there's a China there, Andi, like that shape is alluring.
  • [26:46] Mike: That's right. There's a shape, but But the thing is, this is the thing that I wanted to point out, which is that, uh, I never thought of the reverse of this, but a woman posted something where she said, You know, the first time I saw a man's taint,
  • [26:48] Mike: I found that sort of interesting
  • [26:51] Mike: because it had never occurred to me like, Isn't there supposed to be a vagina there?
  • [26:57] Mike: Right? And it's like the exact opposite ah, sort of experience. And that had never I never thought of that,
  • [26:59] Keith: huh?
  • [27:02] Keith: Okay. Did she describe? Okay, Well,
  • [27:09] Mike: it's just that that's the point is that women don't really have a taint. And so, like, the place where the man's taint is is where, like, the vagina goes.
  • [27:13] Keith: Yeah. I mean, a man's taint is one of the grossest parts on a man.
  • [27:15] Mike: Why do you say that?
  • [27:17] Keith: I mean, is very close to the asshole.
  • [27:27] Keith: Um, well, it And as you move away from the asshole, you get to like being underneath the scrotum, which isn't really a great, you know place, either.
  • [27:33] Keith: Okay. Yeah, I think I'm fairly confident in saying, you know, it's like in the bottom 10 places on a man's body.
  • [27:36] Mike: I'm 10 blazing. Let's list off the other nine.
  • [27:38] Keith: It's gonna be a bus steeds
  • [27:42] Keith: Clickbait article. The bottom 10 places on a man's
  • [27:44] Mike: body, I guess, in his heinous
  • [27:46] Mike: way,
  • [27:48] Mike: Positive?
  • [27:50] Mike: Sure.
  • [27:53] Mike: Um, yeah. I mean the taint. Uh,
  • [28:09] Mike: that's that's true. Although, you see, you could flip that around. There's that sort of guy that I enjoy on Reddit that I'm not sure anybody else gets but me, who complains about the fact that the vagina and the anus on a woman are too close together. And you could argue that the taint solves that for men. So it's some sort of like a
  • [28:18] Mike: ah, while you're considering it gross and kind of a no man's land. On the other hand, it gives you this nice like a few inches of, ah, of protection from his butthole.
  • [28:24] Keith: Yeah, I mean, men don't really need the protection because, like the Penis hole, what's that called again?
  • [28:26] Mike: You're talking about the Meet us. You
  • [28:29] Keith: have to meet us. The medias is
  • [28:34] Keith: sufficiently far away from the asshole that there's no like cross contamination there.
  • [28:49] Mike: Uh, yeah, but let's imagine if your butthole was if there was no taint. So let's imagine if your butthole was just right below your balls, how that would work out or yeah, instead of your balls or what? No save right below your balls, because that's that is, on some level, the situation that women are placed in by
  • [28:54] Keith: by by a large wrong. You would have to lift your balls to poop.
  • [29:02] Mike: Well, you were just saying, 00 so you wouldn't I mean, I think that. I think that I think you get some benefit out of that
  • [29:05] Mike: five or six inches or whatever it is of ah,
  • [29:07] Mike: of distance
  • [29:09] Mike: is placed there away from Uranus. I
  • [29:18] Keith: guess what I'm saying is I think women would get Maur benefit than a man would, because already you naturally have the scrotum wall, which, like protects contamination.
  • [29:23] Mike: So you're agreeing with the crazy guy on Reddit that thinks of women's vaginas should be like where their belly button is.
  • [29:30] Keith: Listen, I'm pretty pleased with the current lay of the land down there, but it's not. It's not perfect from a
  • [29:32] Keith: health standpoint.
  • [29:33] Mike: Okay, so you know. So
  • [29:36] Keith: you do agree with things
  • [29:40] Mike: guy like, if people look him up on Reddit, you'd have to search a little bit, but like
  • [29:49] Mike: he has, he's one of the most down voted people I've ever seen. And he really believes in this to the point where he's posted it repeatedly. And then he got his account band, I think
  • [29:58] Mike: repeatedly complained to be like, Look, women are just a biological error that's been it's here, and women would be like we're talking about like this is just normal,
  • [30:01] Mike: and I guess. Keith, you're saying that you're on his side?
  • [30:08] Keith: Yeah, I guess. But I mean, is this, like, sighting within neo Nazi? Like when we're done that you're, like, anti feminist for the rest of your life?
  • [30:17] Mike: A little bit. Yeah. You're You're really So you're so you actually wished that women had a taint And if a woman had a taint, would you consider it gross?
  • [30:22] Keith: I don't know. I mean, this is a really difficult hypothetical. I think it would be. I mean, for starters,
  • [30:32] Keith: if that had been my upbringing and I had only seen that and that was always normal, I think that would be better. But I don't think like I'm not looking for my next partner tohave a taint because
  • [30:35] Keith: that would be weird. Like, do transgender
  • [30:38] Mike: women. In other words, people who are boy.
  • [30:43] Mike: Yeah. If person transitions from being a man to a woman, does that person have a taint?
  • [30:45] Keith: Like, how far down do they do? They cut the
  • [30:51] Mike: whole demon. Oh, gosh. Yeah, I have no idea. I mean, obviously, we could do some research and find some pictures online.
  • [30:51] Mike: We're
  • [31:00] Keith: gonna have to report back on our next episode. this is actually sort of interesting. I don't I'm not sure. How about you do that really have just created at the situation, Mike, whereby
  • [31:03] Keith: Yeah, there's a person with female genitalia who has a taint.
  • [31:12] Mike: Yeah, because I don't I've actually wondered this before. It's one of these things that I like. I'd like to ask medically, but there's no real way to ask. Which is
  • [31:15] Mike: is the presence of the taint caused by
  • [31:18] Mike: the fact that the Penis and the nuts
  • [31:26] Mike: are like, What cause? In other words, does it say, Is it caused because of the man's butt holes Further back,
  • [31:28] Mike: I'm really, really asking the hard questions.
  • [31:31] Keith: Stores are versus the woman's butt hole being further down
  • [31:34] Mike: because because it follow me along with this.
  • [31:39] Mike: The in terms I do know from my extensive research online
  • [31:42] Mike: web empty on Wikipedia,
  • [31:49] Mike: right? Penis is the same as the clit, and you're nuts are the same as the labia. I know that
  • [31:50] Mike: right so
  • [31:52] Keith: that the stem cells
  • [31:58] Mike: where yeah, so it's the same. So in other words, if you and you'll know, you know, you know this is true. This is like a
  • [32:07] Mike: Darth Vader saying search your feelings. Search your feelings. You know that the skin of the lady is same. Skin is your is your scrotum. It is like it's the same. It feels
  • [32:10] Keith: the same. It's definitely the same. Okay, and which is an interesting
  • [32:24] Mike: fact because it gives you an idea of the sensitivity of women's labia, which is not high because it's like, OK, so you got that right. Okay, but you can understand that. But then if you think about it, you're like, OK, so if I was a woman, my vagina would be around where my nuts are.
  • [32:27] Mike: But there's still be a taint.
  • [32:29] Mike: Where is
  • [32:30] Mike: sure
  • [32:32] Mike: to myself what seemed
  • [32:43] Mike: it seems like women's bodies, their pelvises. They're sort of different in some way, which maybe means their butt holes further forward. Which also is another thing that leads to another thing that I discovered that no one else thinks it's impressive but me
  • [32:44] Mike: go on.
  • [32:46] Mike: But it is this fact
  • [33:24] Mike: that and it's like the the old Reddit Mim of the fact that there's a set of people who can poop, who wiped their butts, sitting down on a set of people who wipes standing up Yes and and you wipe sitting down, right? Yeah, of course. Okay. I want to sit down. No, no, no. But but But the thing people don't know is so if you wipe sitting down, you're thinking Oh, of course. But there's a bunch of people out there, the wife standing up and they think, of course, Right, Right, Right. And then they find out that the other thing exists in there like I don't believe it. And then you wind up with a bunch of people, like drilling glory holes in the sides of stalls to take a look at each other and so on, so forth. And then they discover this trouble. Anyway, um,
  • [33:27] Mike: So I lost my train of thought. Was I saying
  • [33:31] Keith: where you've been, you've been obsessed with this taint,
  • [33:33] Mike: right? So where is the taint?
  • [33:35] Mike: And then there's the question. I floss weight training,
  • [33:37] Keith: flood.
  • [33:43] Keith: Damn it. Well, ok, great. I just like the great thing I was gonna come up with. It didn't sound like he was going anywhere. Great.
  • [33:45] Mike: Always going somewhere great. It was going to
  • [33:50] Keith: if you come up with it while they move on to our next topic, we can. We can
  • [33:53] Mike: I will come up with that. You guys stays. Keep listening.
  • [34:07] Keith: All right, So the Tulip Wars wants to know what sounds are normal to make during sex. I know that there shouldn't be any quote unquote normal, but I've heard many times online that men hate fake moaning like a porn star. I tend to get loud in bed, to be honest. And so I felt
  • [34:22] Keith: like that could possibly mean someone like myself. My moans are genuine, but sometimes I moan because there's just so much going on in general. If we just got rough and it's over, I've moved out of satisfaction. But it's genuine. I figure if men don't like that type of thing than what is considered normal.
  • [34:29] Keith: So setting aside the terrible sense construction of this post, Um,
  • [34:37] Keith: yeah, What? What is the right amount of noise to make in bed like, What is what is appropriate? What is inappropriate? I think that's sort of what she's getting at here. For
  • [34:39] Mike: a woman or for a man
  • [34:39] Mike: sheet.
  • [34:49] Keith: The she it's written by a by a lady, and I think she's like concerns that her boyfriend is gonna think her moans or fake I think that's her concern. Um, I don't Yeah,
  • [34:53] Mike: because they probably will be. I mean, if she's thinking about that,
  • [34:55] Mike: you know, if she's modulated,
  • [35:02] Keith: if she's so concerned about what her boyfriend thinks about her moans, it's probable that she faked bones. Is that what you're saying?
  • [35:16] Mike: Well, no, there's a flip side which says that she has, like, sort of a normal cadence. And but she knows. Or she's like she went on Pornhub and she noticed that, like, it sounds like the obviously fake stuff on there. And she's like, Now what?
  • [35:26] Mike: Yeah, so I could see it being I could see that going either ways. I mean, what what do you think about this? What do you think is like? The what you think is the optimal amount of noise for a woman to make? Is that the maximum?
  • [35:34] Keith: I think if a girl is being noisy and it seems involuntary, that's really that's good. That's hot
  • [35:45] Keith: situations whereby that would be annoying, like, you know, if you're at your parent's house or if you're in a place where by discretion is important
  • [35:54] Keith: in that circumstance, like it would be sort of not ideal, but generally like getting good aural feedback from your girlfriend is is attractive.
  • [35:57] Keith: Okay? And you don't worry.
  • [35:57] Keith: Well, I think
  • [36:05] Mike: that no, I don't disagree. I think that you I think the most important word and what you said was the word involved in voluntary,
  • [36:10] Keith: right? Well, yeah. I mean, if she's faking it, that's Pat.
  • [36:13] Keith: Why is that bad?
  • [36:29] Keith: Uh, because if she's faking it and I can detect, she's faking it, then that is Ah. I mean, this is obviously never happened in my life. Probably has happened to you several times, but, um, yeah, that would be That would hurt my ego.
  • [36:29] Keith: Sure.
  • [36:36] Mike: But, I mean, I'm a wait. Why would ever hear you go? Wouldn't you think yourself Well, this is fantastic. Like look what she's willing to do for me.
  • [36:39] Keith: No, I would not think that.
  • [36:40] Mike: What? Why not?
  • [36:42] Keith: Because,
  • [36:48] Keith: I mean, she's already in paint with me. I don't need, like, further sacrifice on her part to understand. Wait. So
  • [36:51] Mike: let me get this right. So you would. Okay, so let's say you
  • [36:53] Keith: is It's a hypothetical situation again, remember?
  • [36:58] Mike: Yes. Oh, so let me just warm up the audience on this a little But we have a friend
  • [37:12] Mike: who will maybe join us on the podcast at some point toe. Give us some some some of his experiences. But he dated a girl who just didn't respond at all. Like just is silent. Just no reactions. Okay,
  • [37:14] Mike: Now, would you rather that
  • [37:20] Mike: or would you rather her like, go ahead and put in a good effort?
  • [37:21] Keith: I'm not sure.
  • [37:29] Keith: I'm not sure. I think they would be similar that the situation whereby she's just sort of laying there like a board sack of potatoes
  • [37:31] Keith: versus the deal.
  • [37:34] Mike: Maybe she likes it, but it's just there's just no sound.
  • [37:39] Keith: Oh, yeah, maybe she's not very confident in herself. Or maybe she's just not that that noisy?
  • [37:43] Keith: Sure, Then that would be fine. That would that would definitely be preferable to
  • [37:44] Keith: faking it.
  • [37:47] Mike: So you would rather have no sound at all,
  • [37:49] Keith: then fakes out? Yes. Okay,
  • [37:52] Keith: on. I would rather have real sound. First, it's no sound and
  • [38:00] Mike: wait. And I'm guessing that you would have the same opinion about the old fake orgasm. You would rather just have a woman that just couldn't have one,
  • [38:02] Mike: then a woman who's gonna fake it for you.
  • [38:03] Keith: Right.
  • [38:07] Keith: Caveat. If she could fake it and I don't know it, then that's probably better. But is
  • [38:11] Mike: that true? You don't care that. So the important thing is your knowledge of it. Not like,
  • [38:15] Keith: Well, I mean, technically, it's impossible to know the difference.
  • [38:21] Mike: Well, unless we start talking about the only device up the ass that, like, measures the contractions that we talked
  • [38:31] Keith: about Yes. You're sure? Yeah. If you have some sort of, like postdoc analysis that were by, like, in the future, she tells you, then. Yeah, that would be that would be worse. That would rather her not have the middle that take it.
  • [38:39] Mike: Okay. Are you okay? But but probably what's really going on here is, in either case, you would break up with the girl, right? Correct.
  • [38:46] Mike: That's interesting. So you would just So for you, it's intolerable to date a girl who does not have orgasms.
  • [38:50] Keith: Yeah, I think so. I think that would be
  • [38:59] Keith: sufficiently harmful to my ego. And I would just feel like the entire experience is not shared in the way that I would like it to be.
  • [38:59] Keith: That's
  • [39:05] Mike: those saying on a second, why your ego go more into that. Like what's what's wrong with, like, what's not What's wrong with you?
  • [39:11] Keith: What you're going to say is that what you're gonna say is that a woman who can't orgasm isn't my fault, right?
  • [39:18] Mike: Oh, no. You don't know what I'm gonna say.
  • [39:32] Mike: This isn't nutty stuff, but no, no, not that It's not your fault, but that, uh, no, no, it's not that it's that, like, it's what I It's the thing with the ego. It's like, Why do you care so much?
  • [39:38] Keith: Because my partner satisfaction is almost more important to me than mine. It actually probably is more implicate later than Monday. Let
  • [39:41] Mike: me ask you this. This is a great question.
  • [39:51] Mike: Do you believe it? This is a topic. I mean, I on the sex subreddit I don't even I just skipped past thes because this is like one of the most frequent flyer topics on there.
  • [39:59] Mike: Girls and guys, women and men will say things like the woman will say, I tried to convince my boyfriend that sometimes I just don't orgasm and it's fine
  • [40:16] Mike: and the guy will say, like the opposite, right? He'll say, Ah, sometimes my girlfriend doesn't orgasm, and she says it's fine. Is it? Really? And what you find there is, like all these women trying to convince the men that, like women, can still enjoy the act without having an orgasm. Like, Do you not believe that?
  • [40:25] Keith: No. I believe they can infect. I believe there is, like, some large plurality plurality. There's a large number of women who can't orgasm
  • [40:27] Keith: on their, you know, otherwise
  • [40:33] Mike: normal functional people there. No, but they're people you wouldn't date.
  • [40:34] Mike: You would just be like, fuck this person,
  • [40:41] Keith: because, I mean, I gotta be honest here. I have never dated someone
  • [40:46] Mike: your, your your client, you through the raccoon going up the tree here, Keith.
  • [40:58] Keith: I mean, first off, first off, like, yeah, Like shit, this podcast have any success like this is definitely gonna come back and bite me. But I don't think I think I've had think I've had one,
  • [41:00] Keith: maybe two.
  • [41:04] Mike: To what? Exactly what you knew about partners who could not orgasm.
  • [41:16] Mike: But Okay, I'm here to tell you that you've had more than that. But they think that because Because when you say it's your ego, right, then they're going to detect that They're like shit. I gotta put on a performance for the sky.
  • [41:25] Keith: Right, Right. Right. Well, I know you don't want me. You're counting. Like I'm only counting partners that you were long enough whereby
  • [41:31] Keith: distinguishing the difference between fake and real is actually possible. Still a long list?
  • [41:39] Keith: Yeah. I have had a number of lengthy relationships. Right, s so so Yeah. Yes. We're saying one or two out of that is still
  • [41:41] Keith: the denominators large, right?
  • [41:48] Mike: So we're down to, like, sub sub 1%
  • [41:52] Keith: e. I had 105 5 year long relationship. It's two
  • [41:55] Mike: 130 year old man
  • [41:57] Mike: vampire
  • [42:06] Mike: eso eso But But the thing about it, like think how rough that is for the girl if you have it like your ego. And this is the thing is this is not a threat. Always goes
  • [42:10] Mike: about this in the sex. Subreddit is the women are like
  • [42:16] Mike: but my my boyfriend, like, insists that I do every time. And then, of course, that's what winds up with
  • [42:18] Mike: with her faking.
  • [42:18] Mike: Yeah,
  • [42:24] Keith: Yeah, Listen like me imposing my ego onto like a sexual encounter is not great.
  • [42:26] Mike: Well, so how do you avoid that
  • [42:28] Keith: I don't avoid it. I mean
  • [42:30] Keith: I mean, look, I don't like,
  • [42:35] Keith: you know, on a first sexual encounter. I'm like, you know, Listen, Suzy,
  • [42:38] Keith: it is. Oh, my God.
  • [42:53] Keith: 60 are one female lizard is hyper important to me that you orgasm here. So did you just give me, like, a playbook for you know how to get you there. And if you know you feel like it's not gonna happen, let's just say good night. Now stop. It's not
  • [42:54] Keith: Would Zane? What? Like
  • [42:59] Mike: you? If you've been down there for, like, 15 minutes and it's just clearly not happening, what's your next move?
  • [43:03] Keith: That's the null set of times
  • [43:10] Keith: What Weight's coming in. That's never happened to me.
  • [43:19] Keith: So how did they know to face? I'm, like, halfway in between. I bet they haven't needed to. So it hasn't been mission.
  • [43:24] Mike: This is okay. All right. So you actually believe what you're saying?
  • [43:30] Keith: Listen, I have obviously been in numerous sexual encounters whereby someone is not orgasm.
  • [43:33] Keith: Oh, you're making that up. It happens. It happens.
  • [43:39] Mike: Yeah. So how do you What's your what's your go to move, Then you sort of like try for a while and then what do you D'oh!
  • [43:45] Keith: It's normally you don't have to sort of end it like normally the other person will be like, You know, let's do something else,
  • [43:48] Mike: right? You get the tap on the shoulder.
  • [43:51] Mike: Hypothetically.
  • [43:54] Mike: Yeah,
  • [43:55] Mike: I
  • [44:02] Keith: think this part of the show is like a disclaimer whereby
  • [44:06] Keith: Yeah, I don't think of coming off very well here. Fine. You're fine.
  • [44:08] Keith: There. There. Yeah. You know,
  • [44:16] Keith: I've had the normal amount of successful and unsuccessful attempts most mostly successful, but you know that not everything is always perfect,
  • [44:20] Mike: right? But he always wants to get the better ladies. So if somebody
  • [44:24] Keith: that I am m v pod on Twitter, Right.
  • [44:26] Mike: Um
  • [44:28] Mike: Okay. So what was the topic again?
  • [44:32] Keith: Oh, right. What sounds are normal to victor eggs. All right.
  • [44:36] Keith: Do you find it obnoxious when people are are super loud?
  • [44:37] Mike: Yes.
  • [44:40] Mike: Yeah, and And I don't like I thought
  • [44:42] Mike: I don't really like, um,
  • [44:44] Mike: as you know, I don't like Ah,
  • [44:54] Mike: the sounds in particular, very sensitive to the really crazy sounds that are made in a very professional seeming porn. I'm not a big fan of that
  • [44:55] Keith: fake. That
  • [44:57] Keith: that's that's a big part of the problem there.
  • [45:01] Mike: What is so? But one another sort of
  • [45:06] Mike: demand that always comes up on Reddit is women will say. And by the way, my own
  • [45:19] Mike: perspective on this is that the women on the sex Reddit are pretty sexed up. In other words, like it's the top 1% of libido women on the Internet. Women can argue with me on that if they want. That's just my perspective. Um, so
  • [45:24] Mike: women on the sex Subreddit often say like they want the guy to make much noise as possible.
  • [45:28] Mike: What's your feeling on that? Like, what do you amp it up for the woman?
  • [45:34] Keith: No, I do not. I suspect that
  • [45:37] Keith: for the same reason that women
  • [45:51] Keith: mostly or sometimes enjoy giving men blowjobs getting good, loud aural feedback in the in the form of grunting or moaning or dirty talk is very attractive for women. That would be my my
  • [45:52] Keith: sort of basically offices.
  • [45:57] Mike: So knowing this, you don't amp it up for them, so that's to say that you're already pretty amped up.
  • [45:59] Keith: Part of it is,
  • [46:07] Keith: you know what the what? You're comfortable with us? Well, like, you know, you can only do so much to act in a situation.
  • [46:19] Keith: So, in other words, some women and some men like our very loud, naturally like That's just sort of like what their body does and what then, what they feel like doing. And then other people sort of have to get into character. To do that,
  • [46:22] Mike: you mean sort of fake it for the woman.
  • [46:28] Keith: I'm not sure if that's exactly the right way of thinking of it. Um, but okay,
  • [46:39] Mike: do you think that the woman's in a similar position and that she might say, like until he's faking it? I'm not into this. Or do you think women are more susceptible being to being fooled?
  • [47:10] Keith: Mmm. That's a provocative question. I'm guessing it's actually about equal on both sides. I bet both sides comptel when it's not Jenny. Also, listen, unless it's like like 1st 2 or three or four times having sex with someone like you, pretty quickly figure out what their Proclivities are. And so like if something like brand new is occurring, it's like who had been sleeping with or like, Why are you doing this like weird thing? Like it's it's hard after you've gotten to know someone toe like, bring something new without it being suspicious.
  • [47:12] Keith: If but see, you're
  • [47:19] Mike: you're a crowd pleaser. And so I think that if a woman said to you that she wanted a lot of noise out of you, I think you would amp it up.
  • [47:30] Mike: I might, uh I know this guy that claims that he makes zero. This is ever actually very proud of this fact that he makes zero involuntary sounds when he's having sex. Do you think about
  • [47:33] Keith: what what voluntary sounds is making?
  • [47:36] Mike: Ah, he likes to say things like, uh,
  • [47:38] Mike: you know, Hey, baby,
  • [47:45] Mike: you like that Things like that, like you're a little like a very light dirty talk. But he doesn't make any involuntary sounds
  • [47:47] Keith: so limited moaning, for example.
  • [47:54] Mike: No, that's moving. Moaning is involuntary. I'm talking about he owned. In other words, he only says English words
  • [47:57] Keith: and intentionally suppressing Or he just
  • [48:00] Mike: claim is there's just no, there's nothing in there.
  • [48:22] Mike: And I think that's pretty common much as I think from my extensive reading of the sex Subreddit, the man who just purely jackhammers the woman is also pretty common, Uh, which is surprising, given the fact that, like in porn. People complain about porn, but actually important shows a like a much wider variety of activities than that. So I wouldn't know where guys would get that from.
  • [48:25] Keith: Well, it's just the thing that gets them to the nut as quickly as
  • [48:28] Mike: possible.
  • [48:33] Mike: Yeah, but you have a more you have a better See, this is This is why people need to,
  • [48:38] Mike: in my view, really come over to the view and like, Okay,
  • [48:44] Mike: there's this notion of getting your nut intensity orgasm intensity higher. Now that's without books.
  • [48:45] Mike: There's there's another.
  • [48:47] Keith: Again. I don't think that's a thing.
  • [49:06] Mike: Okay, fine. Uh, I do. And but But I want to say this, that there's another level of that that I find actually kind of gross and semi revolting. Which is there are guys that get to the level where they do this thing called edging. Are you familiar with this? Yes, I am. Yeah, it's like the guys who posts. So there's Ah subreddit. That's for
  • [49:09] Mike: amateur porn. It's gone wild tube.
  • [49:27] Mike: It's a great one, but eso women will post on there, and we'll get somewhere between, say, 40 and 300 maybe even 500 up votes. which is great for them and men post. And they always get identically zero right. Men get exactly zero oppose, which is fantastic. But these guys will post these videos of themselves,
  • [49:33] Mike: which presumably you don't watch what I do, because I'm I do that kind of thing. You're kind of sore.
  • [49:50] Mike: Yeah. I can't help myself. Um, and they'll be like, I've been edging for a long time. And of course I'm like, All right, well, so you've been edging. And for people that don't know what that means is they get themselves really closed organizing, and then they back off. These people have a lot of time on their hands. They do it again and again and again. And then I guess that their orgasm
  • [49:55] Keith: intensity and they get out there, go pro and record.
  • [49:55] Keith: I think there
  • [50:02] Mike: I have no idea. They probably record the whole thing. They probably have, like, the Snapchat glasses and like Google glass
  • [50:08] Mike: technology around them, like three d modeling their Penis like they've got. They've got problems
  • [50:34] Mike: because they look, they're posting a thing online that literally zero people want to see on. They're still doing it. Um, but, uh, these guys will claim that. That sort of that sort of amps up the intensity and then they'll say things like, Oh, yeah, my wife or girlfriend is also into this edging thing, which I don't believe it's true. I think that the women would not be into that. So the reason I bring those guys up is because I think that's a bridge too far. But I do think that you can amp up your intensity through various behaviors,
  • [50:55] Mike: you know, and for various behaviors, short of some sort of, like, sort of bizarre thing that takes a really long time like edging. Now that being said, you said, you don't think orgasm intensity exists. That's not true in the way I know That's not true, that you think that is because you claimed to have a stronger orgasms when you masturbate than with a girl who you've been seeing for, say, two months. Once you've seen a girl for, say, two months,
  • [51:01] Mike: you're oh, I decreases to below the ally of a masturbation session with your paper towels and such
  • [51:09] Keith: right that's not quite right. The the actual intensity of the orgasm is basically the same,
  • [51:16] Mike: so it's it's the fact that it's the complexity of the interaction makes it sort of not worth it. Yes,
  • [51:20] Mike: Okay. Um, it's I can't I can't even relate to that. You find that the
  • [51:29] Keith: intensity We've already been recorded for 15 minutes. We don't have time to dive into this right now. We can under next episode. But, like this is like 1/2 an hour topic at least. Fine.
  • [51:31] Mike: Fine. What do we do next?
  • [51:36] Keith: Ah, let's do one more here.
  • [51:38] Keith: Um,
  • [51:39] Keith: that one's kind of I'm still
  • [51:47] Mike: trying to come up, by the way, with what was the thing that I was trying to get to with the people wiping their butts?
  • [51:52] Mike: I don't know. I can't come up with it. It's like it's now eating at me. I'm going to go back and listen to this podcast
  • [52:02] Keith: like milk. What's a nice for our listeners is like, you'll go back and you'll figure it out, and then we'll start the next episode with it, and so they won't be. They won't have to go through this pain that you're currently going. That's
  • [52:13] Mike: right for them. It will be like his instantaneous discovery, but for me, like it's it's gonna be like hours of trying to soul search and realize what was what was like getting out. There was something really great there. Really Great.
  • [52:26] Keith: Well, you know, to be continued, I guess. Okay, So, uh, read it. Master 21 asks, Is it possible to sleep through a blowjob? Intercourse an orgasm without waking up at all
  • [52:46] Keith: three. Plainly say no. Here, know any of the three? He says blowjob slash intercourse on, then comma and orgasm. So it's not just like someone like kissing your dick or somehow getting you to penetrate them while you were asleep. Um, you're actually like
  • [52:50] Keith: coming to to an orgasm without waking up. Is that possible?
  • [52:50] Keith: You
  • [52:53] Mike: have to actually orgasm. It can't be just like the
  • [52:54] Mike: you know, there's
  • [53:00] Keith: just there's another that short he doesn't go through like all of the rules. But, you know,
  • [53:06] Keith: let's assume that you have to orgasm here in order and stay asleep in order to, like, sort of check this box.
  • [53:17] Mike: Okay. I mean, there's there's this thing that this sort of like semi rape e thing that people want to have happen, which is the notion they want to be awakened with a blow job.
  • [53:20] Mike: So there's that. People bring that up. Of course, when I
  • [53:24] Keith: wake up, don't you wake up basically immediately,
  • [53:27] Mike: I wake up needing to pee. So, like, I don't think I would like that very much.
  • [53:29] Keith: You were older, but, like,
  • [53:30] Keith: uh,
  • [53:35] Mike: I've always awakened needing to pee because it just makes sense, Right? You drink water before you go to bed?
  • [53:36] Keith: Yep. Yep.
  • [53:41] Mike: Eso So this whole thing would be kind of uncomfortable, like look like you to continue, but I have to go pay. Maybe
  • [53:44] Keith: it's after an afternoon nap or something.
  • [53:44] Keith: I
  • [53:55] Mike: don't think it usually is, but Okay, fine. So Okay, So what I'm thinking of is I'm thinking this is the equivalent of the person who the canonical person is really drunk and they fall asleep on the toilet.
  • [54:03] Mike: Or Elvis who died on the toilet. Sure. So I'm thinking it's like that, right? I mean, to a guy who's really drunk
  • [54:04] Mike: course of your drunk, he might
  • [54:06] Keith: have.
  • [54:10] Keith: I mean, how are you getting an erection while you're asleep?
  • [54:15] Mike: Well, no, no, that that I can answer because you know that during REM sleep, men get erections, right?
  • [54:16] Keith: Yeah, but
  • [54:25] Mike: you can you can. Apparently, you can. The thing they say is if you if you if you put some tape around your cock, it will be like exploded. When you wake up like the tape will,
  • [54:25] Mike: you
  • [54:32] Keith: could prove to yourself you're getting erections and rubs. Yeah, well, I know that. Okay, fine. All right, So
  • [54:51] Mike: there's a There's a reason there's a method to the madness. They're the reason I know that is it's a way for people to determine whether if they have e d, which is the nice term the present day term for, like, limp dick. Yeah, what do you call it? Evidence. Sorry, Little limp dick. Not not drip dick. Cryptic thing
  • [54:59] Mike: City Right? But it's the way to determine whether it's a physical issue or its aim. Something else issue, like, say, mental.
  • [55:08] Mike: You can actually check whether you physically can have an erection easily by, like, sort of putting something around your dick that can break when you get anyway going. What we got
  • [55:35] Keith: thing that's happening here is not like the girl is like, you know, watching his dick all night, waiting for it to get hard and then, like right when he's in. It's like deepest REM sleep decides to start blowing him. That's not what's happening here, like what's happening here, purportedly and And I think this is impossible is that somebody is, like, somehow arousing somebody while they're asleep and then blowing them or having penetrative sex. And I just I reject That is something that's possible.
  • [55:57] Mike: Yeah, I think what's really going on here is the guy has is saying that this is a thing that can happen if he wants to happen so that he's more sex, right? He's like, Look, baby, like, uh, I think I can have sex on a sleep. Let's try it right on. Then you just keep his eyes closed. You like, man, I'm so tired. He's doing it. And then he's pretty happy with that, right?
  • [56:02] Keith: That is almost certainly what what's going on here. If this
  • [56:06] Mike: were possible and this gives you an idea of the difficulty of being a woman,
  • [56:16] Mike: well, there's a lot of things, but I mean, of course, this would be perfectly possible for a woman, right? And you do see this on Reddit to women who claim to want to have a guy have sex with them while they're asleep.
  • [56:26] Keith: Yeah, and there's all kinds of obvious legal and non consensual aspects there. But But setting that aside, Yeah, that that does appear to be a fantasy, right?
  • [56:27] Keith: And so then, But I
  • [56:30] Mike: mean, like, alongside that you have the idea that, like
  • [56:32] Mike: the,
  • [56:33] Mike: um
  • [56:45] Mike: you know, Then there's all the whole like if you if you get pregnant thing and if a guy you know, if that could happen from the guy's perspective, then you have this same issue, right? The like, who have I impregnated tonight?
  • [56:47] Mike: I can't even be sure because I was asleep.
  • [56:49] Keith: Yeah,
  • [56:53] Keith: except that this isn't possible. So that's not
  • [56:53] Keith: it's
  • [56:57] Mike: impossible in. The other great thing about being a guy is that that would never happen. His women don't want actually for that to happen,
  • [57:05] Keith: right? Yeah. It's not like if you fall asleep at a frat party. There's promiscuous women like looking around for, like a Penis to jump on like That's just not right.
  • [57:10] Mike: I mean, the good, both the good and the bad things about being a man or that you're unattractive, right?
  • [57:14] Mike: It's a yes, both good and bad. It's a blessing and a curse as they say.
  • [57:14] Keith: Yeah,
  • [57:19] Keith: well, that seems like a good place to wrap it up. You have any parting thoughts? Like,
  • [57:23] Mike: I just really want to figure out what this thing was. That the pooping in the standing up.
  • [57:45] Keith: We'll get it. We'll get it. We're gonna get it for you. Um, I hate it when that happens. Yeah, it's frustrating. So So that's a wrap on her show today. A za reminder, and I was able to remind several times throughout the show some pretty please. With that, you can contact us on Twitter at y and and the pod and by email at Y M M V pod at gmail dot com, you can send us feedback advice,
  • [57:48] Keith: cookie recipes, whatever they send.
  • [57:52] Mike: You can send nudes, too, but I only know okay, if you send mail
  • [57:57] Keith: fires on this mike like either either you accept nudes or you don't.
  • [58:05] Keith: And if you accept them than you, obviously there's gonna be some huge bad ratio of bad. Too good. But
  • [58:07] Mike: I have.
  • [58:11] Mike: If it's men, I want you to know that you'll get zero votes
  • [58:16] Mike: and we might post it to gone Wild Tube and I will look I will. Look at it. Keith will
  • [58:18] Keith: not
  • [58:24] Keith: really encouraging people here after threatening to post without a public forum,
  • [58:26] Keith: but yeah. Yeah, well, we'll see what we get there. So, yeah.
  • [58:29] Mike: Ever posted on a public forum? You know,
  • [58:33] Keith: that's nice of you. So, yeah. Cookie recipes, whatever. Uh,