YMMV - Your Mileage May Vary Podcast

YMMV is a weekly podcast about SEX and RELATIONSHIPS.

Enjoy YMMV? Please click the above button to subscribe to the show!

To listen to an episode, just scroll down and press the play button.

Episode 35: Anal Bleaching, Cowgirl Penile Risks, Male Masturbation Habits, Finding Porn, Literotica, Large Dildoes

Team YMMV | 4-26-2021 | 1:04:41

Read The Transcript

This week's porn features a woman putting a penis at real risk, and Keith also wants to discuss her anal coloration. What's normal there? And, how much damage can be done to a man in the cowgirl position?

Men spend a lot of time figuring out the "best" way to masturbate. We take a look at different venues for finding porn, the impact of OnlyFans on the industry, and whether Literotica is "enough" to get the job done.

A man claims he set up a fake gloryhole and that his female partner loved it. Another wants to know why women tend to prefer large dildoes (he won't like the answer).

To follow along with the videos discussed at the beginning of the episode:

https://ymmv.me/35/cowgirl

We get a lot of our questions from Reddit, so for our listeners' enjoyment, here are links to some of the questions we discussed this week:

https://ymmv.me/35/fake-gloryhole

https://ymmv.me/35/large-dildoes

Episode Transcript

Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.

[0:02] Keith: our glory holes, like
[0:06] Keith: presuming it's it's an actual woman, Is that something that seems compelling to you?
[0:14] Mike: Um Okay, so so you're putting me in the role of the guy sticking his dick through the glory hole? Yes.
[0:22] Mike: Um and you know, it's a woman on the other side, there's no mystery about the persons.
[0:52] Keith: Hello and welcome to your mileage may vary. We talk about sex and relationships. I am keith, my co host is Mike. Hi Mike. Hello keith. Um I've largely issued the standard podcast begging and our openers lately, but in case it works, here are some reminders. Please rate or review us on your podcasting app. If you'd like to ask us a question or give us some feedback, we provide incentive to do so in the form of a $15 payment to anyone who emails us at y mm the pod at gmail dot com.
[1:07] Keith: Alright, that always feels sort of weird and icky. So let's get on with the show. Um a regular listeners know by now that we open our episodes with a short viewing and analysis of a porn video, so what do you have for us today? Mike?
[1:11] Mike: Well, as usual, we'll put the link to the porn in
[1:17] Mike: the show notes and so people can follow along, and I really encourage people to pull it up, positive, pause the podcast, pull it up, and
[1:20] Mike: then you can sort of play it at the same time we do, and we'll count it down,
[1:27] Mike: you can have the same experience and I'll go ahead and narrate it and then we'll discuss it. This is one that I ran across um
[1:32] Mike: there's a lot of, a lot of sub Reddit's now that have porn, that's sort of
[1:37] Mike: Gifts, as opposed to like full length videos. So this was sort of like 40 seconds, and so I
[1:43] Mike: kind of cycle through a bunch of these sometimes, and this is one that was notable for a couple reasons, so I thought we could talk about it,
[1:44] Mike: So you ready keith?
[1:50] Keith: Yes, all right, I'm going to start in 321 starting,
[2:01] Mike: so you have the famous reverse cowgirl position with the girl's anus in full view and she's going up and down on the man's penis, and the thing that I noticed that's very notable here
[2:08] Mike: is that well, she's actually accelerated, but she was sort of bending his penis. Now she's got her hand under her leg maybe,
[2:10] Mike: No, she's sort of on all fours again,
[2:14] Mike: and you can see his penis sort of like she
[2:17] Mike: she comes down on it and like it kind of
[2:24] Mike: makes an angle and then it pops back out into normal form, which is a little concerning uh
[2:28] Mike: now she's just sort of going up and down again, it continues like this for another like five seconds.
[2:35] Mike: A lot of sort of an issue in her hand is under her. But again it makes me wonder she's holding it up and now it's repeated.
[2:38] Mike: So yeah, there's a couple things notable here. Uh
[2:39] Mike: the
[2:48] Mike: okay I mean it's pretty intense anus viewing in that situation, I can understand why a woman would be a little sensitive about
[2:53] Mike: about doing that to a guy, The other notable thing. Go ahead, can
[2:56] Keith: I stop you there? So
[3:03] Keith: this person is this woman appears to be in very very good shape and she has no
[3:05] Keith: she has no hair
[3:07] Keith: around her anus.
[3:12] Keith: There is like I don't know how to say this in a polite way.
[3:14] Keith: There is some
[3:15] Keith: uh huh
[3:16] Keith: um
[3:20] Keith: brown staining around her anus.
[3:22] Mike: I don't think that has to be staining.
[3:25] Mike: I think it could just be like a different colored skin.
[3:27] Keith: Okay and is that caused?
[3:30] Keith: Okay so it could be standing
[3:38] Keith: or it could be is that caused by the callous that develops around uranus from wiping your ass? Like what or
[3:39] Keith: Yeah like what causes that?
[3:42] Mike: I don't know the answer to that. I mean this is something that comes up a lot on
[3:48] Mike: different sort of sexy subreddit like the sex operator but also other ones that are sort of tangentially related because women
[3:57] Mike: of course become self conscious about it as they sometimes do about things. And then there's this whole question of like should they bleach it should they fix it? Is there some problem there?
[3:58] Mike: And
[4:05] Mike: I mean the standard responses that that's just like the color of the skin in the same way that like the labia aren't like perfectly pink
[4:08] Mike: um or aren't pick at all in many cases.
[4:09] Mike: Yeah,
[4:16] Mike: but it's true like I mean, look, if if I mean I wouldn't think it would be a callous from wiping. That doesn't seem right. But it could be,
[4:24] Mike: you know, I mean it's like a friction callous. Like honestly, I was going to say it could be from poop, but it's not from poop. And the reason why is like,
[4:30] Mike: you know, I've seen enough gay porn to know that the interior of like the rectum is perfectly pink. Like it's not
[4:31] Mike: I don't think that like
[4:33] Keith: there's no there's no internal standing
[4:38] Mike: right now. I mean there's like more mucus in there and stuff, but still like I don't
[4:42] Mike: Yeah, I think it's probably just like a natural variation in skin color. I don't
[4:49] Keith: know. Okay. I don't know if that proves that there couldn't be external staining. I think I agree that.
[4:50] Keith: Yeah, but
[4:57] Keith: often brownish, but sometimes sort of grayish skin, or it's just a different, different color
[5:08] Keith: that you often see around the anus. Yeah, I don't think it's standing from poop. Anyway. Okay, so that was that was thing one that you said was was notable notable of this video. What's thing two?
[5:17] Mike: Oh, I mean the other one, Okay. Generally speaking, like, I don't find this position very compelling and the reason why, and it was really depicted well in this video, and that was the thing that made me
[5:28] Mike: kind of called it out to me for the show, is this whole issue of I mean, if you watch it, like this happens repeatedly, were like, okay, so and maybe this isn't an issue for you keith because your your penis isn't long enough,
[5:31] Mike: but uh
[5:39] Mike: but okay, what? I was just poking you there, but the uh like when she comes down on your cock,
[5:41] Mike: like, it's not
[5:48] Mike: there's I mean there's enough friction there that it has a tendency to sort of bend it back almost into an L shape
[5:52] Mike: kind of in that direction where like, it would be inside her, but like
[6:03] Mike: there's a point where it has a tendency to bend right, so, so it's like it's not going to stay perfectly rigid, and then she sort of does something with her hips to make it kind of slither into her. Did you notice that?
[6:11] Mike: Yeah, I don't find that comfortable, I don't and and also I find it like kind of scary, right? It's like because you you hear stories about men were like,
[6:14] Mike: the woman comes down really hard on it, and it just like,
[6:16] Mike: well yeah, it bends to and there's a lot
[6:21] Keith: of there's a lot of force here, right? Like she's going up and down on it, and
[6:23] Keith: uh
[6:26] Keith: because she's totally in control
[6:32] Keith: and because her control is not super fine tuned, there's the potential that she can
[6:34] Keith: break it.
[6:38] Keith: Um And yeah, I mean, that's like a horrifying thought.
[6:44] Keith: Watching this video does make you like a little bit anxious because you can see a couple times it sort of gets
[6:50] Keith: MS positioned and she has to, like, sort of shimmy a little bit to get it, so that's sliding all the way back in.
[6:50] Keith: And
[6:59] Mike: yeah, I wonder if you can actually tell what's going on when that happens. Like, I mean, she obviously is stopping is the guy, I don't have the audio on here. Maybe the guys saying something. No, he's
[7:05] Keith: groaning as a man typically does import videos. Um
[7:13] Keith: yeah, he's not giving her guidance. I think she can feel when it's not sliding all the way in and then she can sort of
[7:14] Keith: adjust. Yeah,
[7:22] Mike: I suppose you could have your cock so erect that this is not that that's not like a possibility. I'm not sure.
[7:24] Mike: I'm not sure if that's realistic though.
[7:26] Mike: Yeah, I mean you could
[7:29] Keith: risk, you could make an argument that it's
[7:32] Keith: higher risk, higher reward. Like if it's a little bit soft
[7:34] Keith: then
[7:36] Keith: you know, maybe it just,
[7:44] Keith: yeah, if it's super hard and she like jams down on on on it and an ankle that it doesn't go that could be worse than if it were not completely
[7:45] Mike: hard.
[7:47] Mike: I'm not sure.
[7:53] Mike: Yeah, I know it's interesting. So I mean is this a position that you find yourself in as the man frequently? I
[7:55] Keith: have tried this position, it is not
[7:58] Keith: my favorite because
[8:01] Keith: yeah, I would rather regular cowgirl
[8:03] Keith: to this one.
[8:03] Keith: Yeah. I mean the
[8:09] Mike: angles seem to work better. I had. So one thing that I've noticed is that you'll see porn's like this where the guy
[8:13] Mike: port sort of basically puts his hand sort of
[8:22] Mike: maybe a third of the way up his shaft, he'll poke his fingers into his penis to make sure this doesn't happen, sort of keep it because it tends to be that it's going to bend.
[8:34] Mike: So the penis, the cock is bending down right, it's gonna bend around at the midpoint and it's gonna bend down. And so like, basically, so that's probably some sort of a pro move there. I did want to know a guy who like said this was his like go to position. He loved this position.
[8:39] Mike: I never liked probed into. Why though I I um it might be like the visual of her anus.
[8:42] Keith: I suspect it's the optics that he likes because
[8:53] Keith: I think women prefer regular cowgirl because they can grind their clit on your pubic bone and here they would be grinding it I guess against your scrotum or something,
[8:54] Mike: right? And
[8:58] Keith: that's not right. They can't get as much pressure that way I don't think.
[9:00] Mike: Well no definitely not.
[9:06] Mike: I mean yeah the regular cowgirl position I've found and maybe you can corroborate this to like
[9:11] Mike: there's basically like two choices. The woman has she can basically spread her legs
[9:18] Mike: um kind of on her knees, she's gonna be an easier way but she can sort of spread them trying to create the visual here
[9:21] Mike: with with the knees sort of close to your hips.
[9:25] Mike: And the other one is she can basically elongate her legs
[9:28] Mike: so that she's
[9:30] Mike: kind of above you but like
[9:38] Mike: and she's straddling you but her knees are down closer toward your knees, if that makes sense? In the second one, I think it's much more amenable to her grinding. Like
[9:41] Mike: Yeah, it's almost to the point where like the first one I don't think
[9:44] Mike: the girl gets that much out of, but the second one, like she can get a lot of,
[9:46] Keith: the first one is
[9:54] Keith: more of a pogo stick type thing, more performative. And the second I would assume they can get more pressure on their clit.
[9:59] Mike: So you found that as well, Like if if you're with a woman who is getting serious about getting an orgasm
[10:05] Mike: in the woman on top position, she's going to switch to the her knees a little closer to your knees than her knees up at your hip level.
[10:10] Keith: Yes, I think in general, I really do need to start keeping a chart of all this,
[10:11] Mike: definitely. So
[10:17] Keith: I can speak with certainty about these kinds of things instead of relying on my
[10:18] Keith: hazy memory.
[10:19] Mike: Yeah.
[10:22] Keith: Um you have anything else to say about this video?
[10:23] Mike: No, I'm done.
[10:32] Keith: Alright. So at the end of our last episode, we started talking a little bit about our porn viewing habits and I think there's a little bit more to
[10:33] Keith: discuss their
[10:36] Keith: um
[10:38] Keith: first off, how do you decide
[10:41] Keith: when you want to masturbate
[10:45] Mike: of the when question? Okay, so, uh
[10:47] Mike: mm
[10:50] Mike: I mean
[10:54] Mike: it's I think it's mostly like there's some sort of a
[10:59] Mike: trigger in your brain that makes you sort of think about it, which I assume has to do with either
[11:02] Mike: something happening in your life that like
[11:04] Mike: causes you to become horny
[11:09] Mike: or like for a guy. And I think this is way less common for women for the most women
[11:14] Mike: that you just have like this men have like this just kind of bell that rings every
[11:18] Mike: Some number of hours. Where N. is like it's around 24
[11:22] Mike: uh Where it's kind of like hey you know like I
[11:23] Mike: haven't
[11:25] Mike: noted in a while
[11:29] Mike: so I think one or the other of those happens. And then it's like the practical thing of like well
[11:32] Mike: yeah if you're in a situation where it's not
[11:36] Mike: convenient then it's going to sort of nagging you and definitely like
[11:41] Mike: if you ignore it like it becomes more and more insistent right? Like so like
[11:50] Mike: There's like some sort of like exponential back off there where it's like you know 24 hours then 12 then eight. And then it's just gonna become like sort of annoying all the time until you do it.
[11:52] Keith: Yeah I mean
[11:52] Keith: okay
[11:58] Keith: first off I don't really ever have the situation where I cannot I live by myself.
[12:00] Keith: Um
[12:02] Keith: and so,
[12:08] Keith: you know, and for the last year plus of the pandemic, it's mostly just me at home, right?
[12:13] Keith: You know, in other times when I am going into an office or traveling or whatever
[12:17] Keith: situations that occasionally emerge. But
[12:25] Keith: yeah, I feel like, I wonder how many times I've masturbated in the last year. I think it's more than one a day.
[12:29] Keith: It's not that I'm masturbating every day, like sometimes I have partnered sex, but
[12:31] Keith: I think, I think
[12:37] Keith: I've masturbated like three or four times in a day enough times to offset the days that I've had
[12:37] Keith: partnered sex.
[12:41] Mike: You don't think that masturbating that much
[12:46] Mike: reduces the quality of your orgasms to the point where it's like,
[12:50] Mike: yeah, I mean like there isn't some benefit to you of like waiting
[12:52] Mike: A day or 2 to like, enhance that.
[12:57] Keith: I thought you were going to ask if my palms get harry, uh
[12:58] Keith: I
[13:00] Keith: feel like
[13:05] Keith: uh subsequent orgasms in a single day are less satisfying,
[13:06] Keith: but
[13:08] Keith: it doesn't really affect
[13:19] Keith: The quality of the orgasm the next day, or it goes from like, you know, if a standard orgasm intensity is a 10, it goes from like a 10 to a nine or something, it doesn't
[13:24] Keith: okay, But you know, I can't masturbate four times in a row, two days in a row.
[13:28] Mike: Okay, well, let me ask you this because I don't, I feel like maybe you're not doing this in a principled way, Like
[13:34] Mike: when was the last time you didn't masturbate for, say, a week?
[13:36] Keith: Uh
[13:37] Keith: I thought that
[13:39] Keith: never
[13:47] Mike: so like, since you were like, so when you first masturbated as a teenager, that's it, like, you've never taken a week off,
[13:49] Keith: I'll tell you the two times
[13:55] Keith: I can remember in like fairly recent history. I went on a,
[14:02] Keith: I really hope my family never listens to this, but I went on a camping trip, I went on a safari in kenya
[14:08] Keith: and uh, we were in these tent camps and I was just sharing a tent with my sister and
[14:12] Keith: there wasn't like a private bathroom, so
[14:18] Keith: there just wasn't any way that I could reasonably, unless I like went into the bushes and risk getting eaten by a
[14:20] Mike: library alive.
[14:30] Mike: Let's see there even was a private bathroom, you would have gone in there and just like directed into the toilet. I don't think so. I don't think I could not actually do that without any sort of content. Maybe
[14:33] Keith: maybe if I went a month I could get there, I'm not sure.
[14:39] Keith: Um and then the other time was uh, when was the other time?
[14:45] Keith: I don't remember that. Oh yeah, I was traveling in Southeast Asia and I was in these this like
[14:49] Keith: These tree houses for four nights and
[14:50] Keith: there was,
[14:56] Keith: I mean, they were we were all in like the same 100 square foot space for,
[14:58] Keith: you know, four days. So there was no way.
[15:09] Mike: I mean, of course the disturbing thing in that situation, I assume it wasn't just you and a bunch of ladies, like it was you with, there were a bunch of there were men there as well, right? And I assure you that not all the men were being as conscientious
[15:14] Mike: about not beating off in front of, you know, I'm sure there was some dude and they're beating off, I'm sure
[15:15] Keith: that's
[15:20] Keith: probable and horrifying. Yeah. Okay, so all right.
[15:25] Mike: But the question, the question is like, okay, the question, the question is like, or maybe like three days, five days. Like the question is like
[15:31] Mike: okay you're saying it's around the same after one day. But I have found in my life that like
[15:36] Mike: 3, 4, 5 day layoff, it's significantly better.
[15:40] Keith: Well, it would have to be three times better or whatever to I think it is.
[15:52] Mike: Well it doesn't justify it because of that like sort of nagging, like oh I want to beat off thing. But I think it actually, for me might be that much better. Like it's like because sometimes like on a daily or more than once a day habit I guess.
[15:59] Mike: Sometimes like it's not really that good at all, it's like, oh that was a waste of whatever amount of time. 30 minutes or whatever.
[16:00] Mike: Yeah.
[16:05] Keith: Well okay, alright, I'm glad you bring up the amount of time thing here. So
[16:07] Keith: um
[16:11] Keith: sometimes I will take that long to
[16:12] Keith: to come,
[16:14] Keith: but I think most of my
[16:18] Keith: masturbation sessions are shorter than that.
[16:20] Keith: I think there I don't,
[16:28] Keith: I have a feeling they're usually around 20 minutes or something. I always think they're going to be faster and then I look at the clock when I'm done, I'm like man
[16:29] Keith: this is really
[16:37] Mike: depraved, you know, a very long time ago. The long long bill. I videoed not my
[16:41] Mike: I have videoed my penis to but in this case I just videoed like
[16:52] Mike: from chest up of myself beating off because I was sort of curious and it was so embarrassing because all it is is you just like staring at something and just moving your eyes back and forth.
[16:55] Mike: It's like you see it and you're like wow, I really am just an animal.
[16:59] Keith: Yeah, I have not done that
[17:03] Keith: because I think it would be. Yeah, I would just be depressing.
[17:04] Keith: Um
[17:10] Mike: I yeah, I guess I expected something better than that, but that's yeah, I did did not do it again. I was like, oh
[17:12] Mike: that's great. That's where I am.
[17:19] Mike: 20 minutes. But okay. So you're saying that you don't it does not make it big enough difference
[17:23] Mike: sensation wise for you to ever even consider like delaying
[17:27] Mike: to like go for that bet or not.
[17:31] Keith: I mean I've been experimenting with
[17:36] Keith: alternate day fasting lately. Maybe I should also
[17:40] Keith: that's too much tamp down, tamp down my masturbation and see if you
[17:46] Mike: didn't find that like when you hold off for a few days or whatever, that there's more nuts than right.
[17:47] Mike: Yes.
[17:51] Mike: Yes. So it could be fun for you too
[17:56] Mike: if you know you're going to sleep with a new partner to just sort of like produce a huge amount of semen.
[17:58] Mike: I don't want to pay for her. I'm
[18:02] Mike: for is the wrong proposition. It's got to be like at her
[18:05] Mike: because it's not necessarily desired when it becomes more than a certain quantity,
[18:08] Mike: right? Actually. His design
[18:13] Keith: had, I had an experience a few months ago where um,
[18:17] Keith: my first met with a new partner was from oral sex
[18:23] Keith: and she seemed a bit surprised and overwhelmed by the quantity
[18:26] Keith: of semen. And I think it had been two days for me.
[18:34] Keith: And so now I wonder, yeah, like as a, as a service to be, to be nice to be thoughtful for my partners, Maybe I should masturbate the day before
[18:36] Keith: or the same day.
[18:39] Mike: Well, was she upset or was it just kind of like, wow.
[18:44] Keith: Yeah, it was, she was kind of like, wow, she wasn't upset. But who knows what she actually thought.
[18:47] Mike: She seemed to probably thought wow he really likes me.
[18:49] Keith: Yeah I think that was
[18:50] Keith: yeah
[18:52] Keith: her prevailing emotion.
[18:55] Mike: Yes that's that's that's
[18:57] Mike: right,
[19:00] Mike: that makes sense. Okay so the the porn viewing habits though. Ok. So yeah.
[19:04] Keith: Ok. Yeah. All right. So now we've we've decided we're going to masturbate
[19:06] Keith: and almost always had a computer
[19:08] Keith: and
[19:16] Keith: I have a bunch of different things. I do. I think your your setup is pretty standard so maybe you should explain yours first and then all I
[19:20] Mike: mean I basically have I don't know if it's that standard because I think that
[19:32] Mike: I have this impression that the standard the absolute standard thing people do is they just go to like porn hub and basically like whatever the recommended porn's are on there. I don't know why I think that but I like that's my do you have an account?
[19:36] Mike: No, no I don't either because
[19:39] Keith: I mean what if that shit gets hacked?
[19:40] Keith: Um
[19:42] Mike: We'll be kind of funny.
[19:44] Mike: I really don't want like the last
[19:54] Keith: seven years or however long porno has been around for my masturbating history to be like, you know because they probably like can you imagine the data they have
[19:55] Keith: um
[19:58] Mike: Yeah like everything I've searched,
[20:00] Mike: they know where you are but they don't know.
[20:02] Mike: That's true. They know.
[20:04] Mike: Yeah. Yeah. I mean they have to try. Yeah if they had an email
[20:08] Keith: to do it just using IP addresses but in any case
[20:14] Keith: so like yeah maybe I'm not actually that protected by not having an account. Maybe I need to use a VPN but um
[20:22] Keith: yeah I don't have an account. But the reason why I asked is I wonder if they're algorithm gets really good at surfacing content that
[20:23] Keith: it knows. You'll like
[20:26] Mike: I haven't noticed that like in fact I
[20:28] Mike: but you don't have an account
[20:37] Mike: well but they still know who I am. I mean like I don't I I don't I don't use incognito mode. I use the same couple browsers. Like it's I don't I don't do anything to try to
[20:40] Mike: conceal who I am. And so you'd think they could surface
[20:43] Mike: higher and higher quality
[20:49] Mike: content for me. But yeah in fact like it seems the opposite like what they what they suggest is usually kind of repellent.
[20:50] Mike: And
[20:55] Mike: the let me yeah let me say so anyway my impression is that people
[21:04] Mike: uh the standard thing is you just go to porn up and look I just assumed that like my mental model of other people is just like kind of they just do the easiest thing.
[21:08] Mike: What I do is I have a series of subjects that I go to,
[21:09] Mike: and
[21:13] Mike: there's usually a sufficient amount of new content on those
[21:15] Mike: two,
[21:20] Mike: and it's usually links over to things like porn hub. And then the other thing you can do is like
[21:24] Mike: whoever made the content on porn hub, you can click on their username and
[21:26] Mike: go over and see if they have other content.
[21:28] Mike: But the whole the whole operation
[21:31] Mike: the whole apparatus is designed to try to find new
[21:40] Mike: novelty right? Like uh as far as I can tell, I have some sort of like really really good video graphic memory of porn
[21:44] Mike: and so and I suspect this is common. And so if I've seen the porn,
[21:46] Mike: I don't know in the last
[21:49] Mike: maybe even year, like it's I'm just gonna be like, oh I saw this already,
[21:54] Mike: which is kind of shocking that I can do that, but that's and I don't think that's me being special. I suspect that no,
[21:57] Keith: I'm exactly the same. And
[22:00] Keith: I don't know. Yeah, that's a little bit scary.
[22:02] Keith: Uh huh
[22:07] Keith: Because I feel like that might relate to how quickly I tire of
[22:09] Keith: actual sexual partners.
[22:11] Keith: But
[22:21] Keith: I don't know. I guess it's encouraging that you also so like why do but I mean, you know, some people have these like hard drives filled of porn. Like why why would that be
[22:24] Keith: that's totally uncompelling to me. Like I don't really want to see anything that I've seen before.
[22:39] Mike: That's right. Yeah. Like as soon as the tube sites came out whenever that was like 10 years ago, I like deleted all my downloaded porn because what's the point? Because like, yeah, the whole point is I want new stuff and like, yeah, the big, the big fear. Of course it's not a fear. The big concern
[22:48] Mike: is that with the rise of only fans uh where people where women can charge of course I realize we've had guests, we had at least one guest on saying, hey, you should pay for porn,
[22:49] Mike: which I'm not going to do.
[22:50] Mike: Um
[22:51] Mike: Mhm.
[22:52] Mike: But
[22:55] Mike: the or I won't do it certainly while it's free,
[23:02] Mike: but with the rise of like only fans and the like it makes you wonder. And I have noticed that there's like uh there's less like
[23:07] Mike: there's less new porn on the subreddit and I look around for new subreddit.
[23:12] Mike: There is not, yeah, they're just this less newborn per day than there was, say three years ago.
[23:14] Mike: And I attribute that to
[23:23] Mike: the fact that men are more willing to pay it. So I could imagine porn going the direction of sort of like Spotify, like a streaming service where you do wind up having to pay some amount, just a
[23:24] Mike: get fresh content.
[23:30] Mike: Um anyway, so yeah, like but but yeah, okay, in terms of the subreddit that I frequent,
[23:31] Mike: um it's all like
[23:34] Mike: targeted towards like amateur porn,
[23:36] Mike: that's like the main
[23:41] Mike: the main thing, so basically look, none of it's amateur, I know that, or like essentially none of it is
[23:43] Mike: um because like
[23:48] Mike: normal people don't videotape themselves and sometimes the camera moves, so you know, there's a cameraman so forth,
[23:55] Mike: but so it's not amateur, it's not really amateur, but it gives the appearance of being amateur, and so that's like the stuff that I like
[23:57] Mike: and like yeah,
[24:04] Mike: I mean occasionally like I'll veer off into some weird like fetish thing, but the standard thing that I like is like something that like sort of sort of looks realistic,
[24:12] Mike: which means that like that's why some of the porn's that I pick for the podcast come from, the more like female oriented
[24:16] Mike: porn subreddit is because for whatever. I mean, yeah, I guess my
[24:18] Mike: preference like aligns
[24:22] Mike: better with the preference of what women would want, although
[24:28] Mike: women also want like lots of men with mustaches and beards giving cunnilingus for long periods of time, which I do not want
[24:31] Mike: um and I do not want.
[24:32] Mike: Mhm.
[24:34] Mike: Lots of like kissing,
[24:38] Mike: I don't want like yes and like and like women, okay, just kind of like just
[24:39] Keith: like
[24:47] Keith: Just to illustrate your point here, here's so when you go to the porn hub homepage, it recommends 10 videos. So these are the hot porn videos in the United States right now,
[24:54] Keith: and just to illustrate that these are not at all amateurish. The number one is Bang brothers, busty, redhead paw dog,
[24:57] Keith: Lena paul getting fucked. Do you know what appalling is?
[25:09] Mike: P. A. W. G. I really dislike that term because it's uh it's fat is P. P. H. Phat ass white girl. And I really didn't like because I don't like the kind of off spelling of fat,
[25:10] Keith: right?
[25:15] Keith: The next one is step mom joo I slash cream pie. You know J. O. I. Is
[25:19] Mike: jerk off instructions. This is great. This could be like some sort of test.
[25:24] Mike: All right, listen, it's going to follow along and see if they know these things. Uh number two
[25:26] Keith: is sorry,
[25:28] Mike: was it step mom geoeye,
[25:29] Keith: That's right.
[25:31] Mike: So, I have that one on my homepage as well.
[25:34] Keith: Okay, there's my creepy roommate. Fuck.
[25:41] Keith: Um Yeah, I fucked my team. I fucked my teen stepdaughter, Hannah hays, I can't resist.
[25:43] Mike: Yeah, I got that one. Except it's in french.
[25:50] Keith: Okay tight asian school tina tight asian students tina needed help with school funding.
[25:54] Mike: Yeah, I mean, Yeah. Right. This is actually kind of frustrating. It's frustrating to me
[26:03] Mike: that you and I have exactly either. Either they're doing no personalization, which is what it is or you and I have exactly the same taste, but it's it's that they're doing that systematically.
[26:07] Keith: Yeah, I mean it goes on naughty step daughter, Peyton, Robbie switch step daddy's.
[26:08] Keith: Mhm
[26:20] Keith: Right. Um Yeah, I mean it's just all this like standard, there's like three tropes, one is the like the stepfather stepdaughter one is the stepmother stepson.
[26:22] Keith: That might be basically it. Wait,
[26:25] Mike: wait, but do you have the one with the Russian title?
[26:26] Mike: Mm
[26:27] Keith: No.
[26:32] Mike: Slutskaya? She uh yeah, I don't know
[26:35] Keith: what standard pronunciation. No, I do not have that one. I
[26:37] Mike: have no idea what it means.
[26:44] Keith: But anyway, the point is like, unless your predilections are for this sort of like highly produced
[26:46] Keith: lame trope
[26:51] Keith: Um porn and it's often the same sort of like 30 or 40 porn stars.
[26:53] Keith: Um
[26:58] Keith: yeah, you have to like, porn hubs, homepage is not useful now, you can sort of dive into it,
[27:00] Keith: but
[27:01] Keith: uh
[27:03] Keith: you often end up in this
[27:14] Keith: sort of disappointing situation where like, yeah, I don't think porn hub has great tools. You can find links to porn hub videos on certain subreddit. S that can be more compelling, but I don't know.
[27:18] Keith: I have not yet figured out how to
[27:22] Keith: satisfyingly quickly surf porn hubs. Maine site is that
[27:30] Mike: you know that one of the comments that juniper few episodes ago made the cam girl who also does only fans
[27:32] Mike: that um
[27:38] Mike: very few people re subscribe really rings true. It's like what a guy really wants and might pay for
[27:40] Mike: is something where
[27:45] Mike: it's like curated, but like, unfortunately like you want the women to change constantly.
[27:50] Mike: So it's like the worst possible scenario for the actress, right? Because it's like,
[27:57] Mike: Yeah, I mean most they're gonna get to make like 10 videos and then that's it. Like, it's literally they should leave the industry then because
[27:59] Mike: that's it. Like,
[28:02] Mike: well anyway, that's the way I feel better. I realize there's some porn stars
[28:03] Mike: who are
[28:06] Mike: famous and have been like enduringly famous.
[28:09] Mike: That's surprising to me because you think I'll get rid of them.
[28:11] Keith: There's not that many and I think
[28:14] Keith: there's sort of a long tail and viewing habits
[28:15] Keith: of
[28:17] Keith: men. So like,
[28:19] Keith: you know when there's a new porn star on the scene,
[28:21] Keith: some people
[28:22] Keith: discover her quickly.
[28:28] Keith: Um do you ever, I'm going to bring this back to the topic. Do you ever torrent porn?
[28:30] Mike: Never. I used to,
[28:34] Keith: the torrent sites have a pretty good comment system
[28:36] Keith: and
[28:38] Keith: you'll see people complaining about
[28:43] Keith: certain porn stars doing like a lot of videos in a short period of time
[28:49] Keith: and they'll, you know, talk about how, you know, she's used up in this kind of stuff and it's um
[28:55] Keith: yeah, it's interesting, like a novelty is king. I think in the porn industry for for most people,
[28:59] Mike: why why are you tormenting porn?
[29:00] Keith: It's higher quality
[29:03] Keith: than whatever you get on
[29:04] Keith: corn hub. Okay,
[29:09] Mike: so I have a feeling that you are like, so I think my porn viewing habits are kind of unfortunate and boring,
[29:15] Mike: although I do uncover very unusual types of porn, but I think that has to do with my
[29:22] Mike: uh sort of dynamic range of like lots of different stuff that I'm willing to look at. Uh although it's not what we should talk about, What like
[29:24] Mike: we should talk about in a minute, like what
[29:35] Mike: kind of gets you to the nut or how that proceeds. But I think that you have some sort of more diverse range of sources. I mean, the animated porn in particular, like, I don't know where you're finding that.
[29:38] Mike: So why don't you talk about what you
[29:44] Mike: How you see it in your 20 minute masturbation session? Like how many videos do you think you go through?
[29:47] Mike: Oh my gosh!
[29:52] Keith: Many. It depends. Sometimes I get concerned that
[29:53] Keith: my
[29:57] Keith: porn viewing is too spastic and that I'm like,
[29:59] Keith: seeing too much stuff.
[30:04] Keith: And so I'll decide that I want to watch just one video.
[30:06] Mike: So there's something that neurotic,
[30:10] Mike: there's some sort of neurosis that actually invades your masturbation where you're like, what's wrong with me?
[30:15] Keith: Yeah, I need to do something different than what I think I would do on autopilot.
[30:21] Mike: Yeah. I don't I don't have that at all but Okay so so but but Okay but in the main, what do you think you do?
[30:26] Keith: I would say there's sort of two different modes. 1st. I would call
[30:27] Keith: Explorer mode
[30:31] Keith: which is I
[30:35] Keith: start somewhere. Maybe it's porn hub,
[30:37] Keith: Maybe it's one of the subreddit
[30:41] Keith: and I find
[30:45] Keith: someone or something that I'm interested in
[30:51] Keith: and then I'll search for a bunch of videos maybe of that specific person. So
[30:53] Keith: um lately you
[30:56] Mike: reveal what subreddit, so you go to
[30:59] Mike: um like like I for instance go to uh
[31:04] Mike: gone wild tube, homemade xxx Yeah, I don't two main ones,
[31:08] Keith: I don't use either of those. Uh
[31:14] Keith: I'll use so I used to really like the porn vids subreddit and I would sort by top for the week but
[31:16] Mike: really professional. Yeah. Yeah.
[31:21] Keith: They're mostly professional and that separate. It's kind of dying. I don't know where people are going.
[31:22] Keith: Um
[31:23] Keith: But
[31:25] Keith: now you can get
[31:28] Keith: a lot of interesting stuff if you go to
[31:30] Keith: um
[31:33] Keith: I don't know like the real girls subreddit or
[31:40] Mike: I wish I should have been before we did this. And the whole premise of the real girls subreddit that they're like,
[31:43] Mike: you know, not porn stars.
[31:53] Keith: Yes, but a lot of them are trying to drive people toward their only fans content. So what you can do is you can sort by top for like the last month
[32:00] Keith: and then you can click on the user name and then you can sort their all of their posts by top
[32:06] Keith: and you can see the most up voted things they've ever posted to reddit and likes. Oftentimes there will be videos
[32:09] Keith: and so if you find someone you like, you can
[32:14] Keith: explore their entire move oeuvre, How do you say that work? That word?
[32:15] Keith: Okay.
[32:17] Keith: Ah
[32:23] Keith: that's an easy way and then sometimes I'll get locked on to a certain porn star, like I've been sort of into
[32:26] Keith: this point star named Emily Willis lately.
[32:28] Keith: I like she's very vocal
[32:37] Keith: uh in her porn's um and her stuff is very highly produced, but that's that's an example of when I would go to Bittorrent because you can search for somebody
[32:44] Keith: and then get a bunch of their videos and they're not just like the eight minute clip that you often get on porn hub, It's the
[32:56] Mike: Okay, so do you think, like, do you think your porn viewing is like more relational and mine is more situational or something like, I, like, I couldn't care less honest, like, I want novelty. It's annoying to me because I mean,
[33:01] Mike: yes, it's annoying to me if it's the same person again and again, although I think I suspect I have more tolerance for that than you do.
[33:02] Mike: Um
[33:03] Mike: but
[33:07] Mike: I don't in any way,
[33:15] Mike: like, the only reason why I would look for Emily Willis is different videos is because I'd be like, oh, I liked one, so I'm gonna probably like another one,
[33:25] Mike: but it has nothing to do with like the fact that it was her again and again. So if, like, it was if I was searching the director or the producer is something that would be fine with me. Like, it doesn't matter to me that it's the same person. In fact,
[33:27] Mike: like,
[33:31] Mike: while I'm very attuned into the situations in the porn, like,
[33:36] Mike: I would know if I saw the same situation again, I'm not sure I could even recognize the women.
[33:43] Mike: I'd be like, oh, are you the same one from there? But but it sounds like for you, like you have you almost have some relationship with this Check. Yeah.
[33:49] Keith: I think I could recognize like if if you go to porn hub, there's a ranking of
[33:51] Mike: top models.
[33:52] Keith: You know their names?
[33:59] Keith: Yeah, I think I probably know and I don't know if I'm trying to find it right now. Uh here we go. Most popular.
[34:02] Keith: Yeah. I think I would know most of the
[34:03] Keith: top 20.
[34:07] Keith: Emily Willis is number 14 right now, by the way.
[34:09] Keith: Yeah, I know basically everyone on this list,
[34:13] Mike: we were just, I mean for me and the listeners, where did you go to find this on for now? It's
[34:15] Keith: port hub dot com slash porn stars.
[34:17] Mike: Okay, by the way, there's a
[34:22] Mike: in the menu on porno dot com, there's a menu item that just says fuck now,
[34:24] Mike: oh great. It's an ad. I wish,
[34:27] Keith: I wish I knew about that before now.
[34:31] Keith: It sounds legit. Does your penis also get two
[34:38] Mike: bigger? Yeah I got to uh the doorbell just rang, I gotta go keith not singles in your
[34:47] Keith: area. Did you see the thing, did you see the thing the guy posted? He was on the International space station and he got an ad there was it was like
[34:57] Keith: find hot singles in your local area and it uses geo location on the I. P. So it was like the international space, you know, I find hot local singles on the international
[34:59] Mike: space station,
[35:01] Keith: it's ridiculous. They
[35:05] Mike: must have some strategy for letting those guys beat off. But anyway
[35:09] Keith: uh yeah I read a thing about that but I can't remember,
[35:12] Keith: it was somebody was speculating about it on hacker news. I
[35:16] Mike: mean, they're very pragmatic, they must just have some way, Right?
[35:17] Mike: Yeah.
[35:20] Keith: Um Okay, so when you were,
[35:27] Keith: you know, doing the needful, how do you decide when you want to come? Like, you know, you're just
[35:38] Keith: plotting along and you see something that's kind of stimulating, you're like, all right, this this could get it done, but you could, you know, skip around and try to find something better or delay,
[35:43] Keith: delay the gratification. Like how do you decide
[35:45] Keith: when it's time to blast off?
[35:50] Mike: Yeah, so, I mean, it's always you're always looking for, I mean, I think that I spend
[35:54] Mike: the time looking for a porn that
[35:58] Mike: he's going to do it and it's not always the same thing.
[36:02] Mike: Um and I don't really know if there's like one unique thing
[36:06] Mike: that I'm sure there's like, if I'm sure if you like,
[36:12] Mike: went through and analyzed for a year or something like the porn's and if I said, oh, this is the one that I ejaculated too,
[36:16] Mike: you'd find some common thread there. I don't know exactly what it is, but I basically go through
[36:18] Mike: and try to find
[36:20] Mike: one that's novel
[36:27] Mike: that meets some kind of a criteria. Oftentimes I will find one that's pretty good, and then I'll keep I'll keep it in a tab and I'll go looking for another one.
[36:28] Mike: Um
[36:31] Mike: and I'll definitely like take the video,
[36:33] Mike: I will watch,
[36:34] Mike: uh
[36:42] Mike: I'll sort of skip around in it. Kind of get a sense of what's in the video. Uh And then if there's a section that I really like, I'm like, okay, this is good,
[36:47] Mike: and then maybe I'll look for a better one and then sometimes you just encounter when you're like, oh, this is great, okay, I'm gonna use this one.
[36:50] Mike: And so the whole thing basically comes down to like,
[36:55] Mike: yeah, I mean it really follows kind of the script of,
[37:00] Mike: you know, sex, which is like, you know, you become aroused, which is like your brain tells you it's time to beat off.
[37:06] Mike: You have like a plateau where you're basically like, yeah, I'm pretty aroused, but like it's sort of flat and then like,
[37:09] Mike: yeah, there's like a
[37:30] Mike: call it like one minute to two minute part of the masturbation session, that's much better than the rest. And that's the part when I'm using the thing, I'm going to nut to. I yes, in general, I know which part I'm going to nut to. I make that decision is a conscious decision. It's not surprising, like I'm not I don't just like blast off surprised. Yeah, not at all.
[37:31] Mike: Yes,
[37:44] Keith: my strategy is similar. Like I'm sort of exploring around, I keep a few things in different tabs that are that I know are good enough, but you know, maybe I can find something better or maybe I just want to stroke it for a while longer and then
[37:46] Keith: eventually
[37:53] Keith: I find something that is compelling enough or I get bored and and switch to one of the tabs that I know is good enough.
[37:58] Mike: Hang on, you said something there that didn't ring right to me though. I think I don't think that okay.
[38:01] Mike: I think that in my process
[38:04] Mike: I'm trying to find a porn that
[38:06] Mike: is going to work
[38:07] Mike: and
[38:13] Mike: sometimes I sometimes I find one that I just know what work. Sometimes I don't find one at all and I have a few that I've saved. Like
[38:17] Mike: and when I say save, like I saved them on Reddit or whatever
[38:21] Mike: where I can go back to look, okay fine, I'll use this one.
[38:26] Mike: And actually people were interested, maybe I'll post those in the show notes. A couple of them people can enjoy.
[38:39] Mike: See the ones that I've repeatedly used. Maybe that's too gross. But anyway, uh I had a friend send me one that was like, he's like, oh, this is my go to and I found it totally uncompelling, so maybe I won't post it anyway.
[38:40] Mike: Uh
[38:44] Mike: But but the important thing here is that like, I don't think I ever,
[38:51] Mike: I don't think I ever, I'm like, oh, I'm going to beat off for another five minutes in plateau for another five minutes here. No, no, the whole thing is like
[38:53] Mike: trying to get that nut.
[38:57] Mike: And it's just a matter of you could say, well why not? Just not immediately? And the answer is like,
[39:07] Mike: I don't know. It's like, like I'm enough desensitized via porn. Like it's actually a little like, it's like, why don't you just beat off without porn? And it's like, it's actually a little hard.
[39:10] Mike: Yeah, like, I'm not sure I could get the nut out.
[39:19] Keith: Yeah, that, that sounds familiar. Do you ever run into this situation? This happens to me. Sometimes I'll have like, say three or 4 tabs and
[39:33] Keith: I'll go back to them and I like exhaust one. It's like, all right, I still have three left, and then like, I'll exhaust that one and then I have two left and then I'm like, down to the last one and then it's like, shit, like this didn't did it, and then I don't have to like restart, but I'm just sort of like, uh, you know, I really thought,
[39:39] Keith: I really thought I had a fish here. You know, I thought I was going to be able to reel it in
[39:40] Keith: and uh
[39:46] Mike: yeah, it's very fortunate and for our female listeners, I think men will all get this, like the issue is
[39:48] Mike: you have to come,
[39:55] Mike: like, you can't just be like, okay, whatever, like if you don't know, you're going to be incredibly uncomfortable for the next like
[39:58] Mike: however many hours and it's like, no, you have to finish
[40:00] Mike: and
[40:07] Mike: Yeah, so you can wind up with and that's the thing. It's like you have like your 20 minutes, whatever amount of time you don't want to spend two hours doing it partly because like
[40:09] Mike: you actually start to hurt,
[40:12] Mike: you know, you gotta get the nut out
[40:13] Mike: and
[40:19] Mike: yeah, I mean that can get really annoying. So yeah, you don't have some standby ones that you use.
[40:20] Keith: I
[40:25] Keith: don't, that might be a good reason to create a porn hub account. I'm sure you can star and save.
[40:33] Keith: But yeah, I mean it sort of reminds me of those bad progress bars. You see sometimes, you know, it goes like 10%, 20% 30 and then,
[40:42] Keith: You know, it'll be at 90 and then for some reason it will go back down to like 65 and you're like, what the hell? Like it's like a frustrating experience to have
[40:48] Mike: to well or something like non sexual happens. Like somebody calls, you, you have to deal with that too. Yeah.
[40:54] Keith: Fuck yeah. That doesn't happen to me very often either. Um, but
[40:58] Keith: it's not great when it does. The doorbell rang czar,
[41:01] Mike: Whatever may be your stimulus check arrives, right?
[41:06] Keith: Steamy check Is the uh, what the kids are calling it?
[41:08] Keith: Yeah.
[41:15] Keith: Okay. Should we maybe we've talked enough about our porn viewing, do you want to take you want to do a couple of reddit topics?
[41:19] Mike: Okay, I think hang on, hang on, hang on, keith. There's one of you mentioned before the show that I want to
[41:24] Mike: get a little more detail and so you mentioned this is something that I used to do
[41:28] Mike: before, there was video porn available. Okay.
[41:34] Mike: Uh so yeah, like I is a very young man, younger than Okay,
[41:39] Mike: not younger than most because nowadays, like I don't know what age people get access to porn, but it's really young
[41:45] Mike: but I earlier in terms of like the calendar, I had access to porn online than most people because I
[41:48] Mike: was technology technologically savvy.
[41:52] Mike: However it was just images and so sometimes I wouldn't do it. And so I would
[41:59] Mike: sometimes read stories that people had written porn stories and you said you actually still do that.
[42:01] Mike: So what's the jennifer?
[42:03] Keith: Yeah, occasionally
[42:07] Keith: what I feel like my brain is getting desensitized,
[42:08] Keith: I'll
[42:12] Keith: decided that I'm going to read a little Rodica
[42:18] Keith: and when I was younger I really like this, I would, I would like
[42:21] Keith: there were repositories where you could search for celebrities,
[42:29] Keith: So you can look up Natalie Portman or whatever and then you could find 20 stories written about
[42:34] Keith: Fantasies with Natalie Portman, it's like Oh you know we were on studio 21 a
[42:36] Keith: at the you know
[42:41] Keith: filming of whatever and yeah, and then it like
[42:44] Keith: plays out this scene of having sex with Natalie Portman
[42:51] Keith: and now my tastes are a little bit more sophisticated than that. I don't know.
[42:55] Mike: I mean well the main thing that immediately comes to mind there is just like, well couldn't, so
[43:03] Mike: when I would do this long ago, like it was again I was searching for like situations. So I could be something I think with little erotica like it had to be.
[43:10] Mike: I don't remember what I what I remember is like in high school having consumed enough of this. Like I surprised
[43:16] Mike: my knowledge of sex was more than it should have been when I started having sex with women
[43:26] Mike: with girls. It was like whoa you knew about that and it's like uh yeah which was good, it was good but it also was like
[43:29] Mike: a little bit of what's wrong with you. But
[43:30] Mike: the
[43:33] Mike: it was situations but I mean like
[43:35] Mike: a Natalie Portman let erotica like couldn't they just
[43:39] Mike: you will find replace on some other name and like you
[43:40] Mike: you know mike
[43:46] Keith: like I said they would they would describe like oh you know I met her at the movie lot and then we went to this
[43:50] Keith: okay place in L. A. I mean yeah I mean it's totally garbage writing but
[43:57] Keith: um but my recollection is there are a few websites out there now and the authors can get reviews and then
[43:59] Keith: you can sort by author.
[44:03] Mike: Yeah. Where do you find this stuff? You just search little Rodica on google. Yeah.
[44:10] Keith: I think there's a website that's literally literally Tyka dot com. But do you know about keep lop dot com?
[44:11] Mike: What is it
[44:12] Mike: T block
[44:15] Keith: T bloop dot com?
[44:16] Keith: No
[44:19] Keith: it's the big list of porn
[44:21] Keith: and
[44:30] Keith: I think I just tried to pull it up but I think they might be down right now which has never happened before. It's extremely important that this website not go down
[44:32] Keith: okay. Uh
[44:43] Keith: Yeah I think they're down right now. Um but anyway um yeah their premises, 98 of porn sites suck. We list the other two and they have a bunch of categories including
[44:48] Keith: the best sub credits and the best um
[44:58] Keith: Video sites and the best anima sites and the best Little Rodica sites. And so yeah you can just go to t block and then go to the you know the top three or four
[45:00] Keith: um
[45:01] Keith: Text one. Do
[45:05] Mike: you find like is would this be a good option for me in the situation where
[45:09] Mike: I have I've sort of run out of you know on my
[45:15] Mike: various subreddit. There's just nothing nothing new and I don't want to go to an old standby. Yes
[45:16] Keith: I would
[45:17] Keith: I
[45:31] Keith: well I don't know if it if it needs to be text but I would recommend going to something like to block and then using that as a launching pad for further explorations. I can't believe they're down. I've never seen them be down before, and I just frustrating
[45:33] Keith: quite often.
[45:34] Keith: Uh
[45:35] Keith: But
[45:37] Keith: yeah, you can find,
[45:40] Mike: I noticed they have a hint I which maybe that's where you're getting
[45:42] Mike: the animated porn from.
[45:44] Mike: Oh my God, I trust the
[45:47] Keith: guy he lists. It's not down for you, huh? It's just uh I got to
[45:56] Mike: know. I pulled up the google cached for. Okay, okay, Okay, Okay. So I know I know about the asshole, gone, gone wild subreddit. I didn't know that one.
[45:57] Mike: Yeah.
[45:58] Mike: Mhm.
[45:58] Mike: You can Oh my
[45:59] Keith: goodness, study really?
[46:02] Mike: A lot of assholes.
[46:10] Keith: Yeah, I mean, it has some good stuff on there. Some things that you might not have otherwise otherwise known. Alright, let's let's let's move on from
[46:15] Keith: um Okay. I want to I think we would be remiss if we didn't talk about this glory hole one.
[46:17] Keith: Um
[46:23] Mike: It's really gonna be hard to tear myself away from the gymnast nude dot com, but okay, I'll do it. I'll close to that. Let's go,
[46:24] Keith: okay.
[46:42] Keith: This guy describes his glory hole situation. He's he writes. So, I got the idea a few months ago, I ordered a new table online and it came packaged with large sheets of cardboard. I jokingly thought that these would make a great glory hole door and move them into the garage. It was a fantasy that I've always have had, but would never pursue in real life,
[46:43] Keith: and that's
[46:48] Keith: not what ends up happening. But all right, I moved the idea to the back of my mind until I saw the
[46:52] Mike: the key thing the keith is trying to get across here is
[46:55] Mike: glory. Okay, when there's a glory hole, glory hole is where you
[46:57] Mike: can't see the person on the other side.
[47:01] Mike: Yeah. one person is putting a penis through the glory hole
[47:03] Mike: and the other person is a man.
[47:07] Mike: That's the thing you have to know about Gloria was. So if you're putting your penis through the glory hole,
[47:09] Mike: the other person is a man
[47:12] Mike: and women do not do this, but go on. All right,
[47:13] Mike: that's right.
[47:25] Keith: I moved the idea to the back of my mind until I saw the sheets again this weekend while cleaning the garage, brought them inside and put them into the basement so I could work on them. I used to tupperware lid to trace a whole and cut it out.
[47:30] Keith: I lined the edges with some duct tape to prevent any scraping and wrote the words sucker Fuck on the front.
[47:34] Keith: After I was done, I moved the sheets upstairs to the closet I was planning on using.
[47:40] Keith: We were both working from home currently and my office is in the basement. She came down and chatted with me for a bit and started to have a drink,
[47:46] Keith: finished wrapping up work and I told her to stay in the basement until I texted her to come up. She didn't know what I was planning but she grinned and agreed.
[47:47] Keith: Mhm.
[47:49] Keith: Uh huh.
[47:54] Keith: Um I chose a particular closet at our house because it had a wall opposite the door.
[48:05] Keith: I figured she could push against the wall to get some leverage if she wanted to fuck me. That's really considerate. I turned off all the lights in her house to make it seem like a dark slash shady alleys situation.
[48:15] Keith: I left a pillow in a bottle of lube sitting outside the door. I entered the closet and taped up the pieces of cardboard and then took off my shorts and sent her the text to go upstairs
[48:17] Mike: now. Well
[48:22] Mike: this sounds like this is like this sounds like uh this sounds like you're reading from
[48:24] Mike: a
[48:28] Mike: whatever. Like is sent to the judge in a divorce proceeding.
[48:35] Mike: Yeah it's like and then I left the very factual right? Yeah. It's not that it's actual
[48:39] Mike: it's not just that it's factual, it's that like no woman wants this,
[48:41] Mike: this is like the worst.
[48:46] Mike: This is just not this is not compelling but okay go on.
[48:56] Keith: Yeah. Well this guy's going to beg to differ with you but I will I will go on. She came back up after a few minutes and saw the situation that I prepared. She read what I had written on the door and said sucker, fuck why not both.
[48:59] Keith: I smiled and we started playing around. It was an odd
[49:02] Mike: but he smiled.
[49:07] Mike: Oh I thought he was in the he stuck his dick through and he called her.
[49:08] Keith: He did
[49:11] Keith: well, he says I smiled and we started playing around.
[49:12] Keith: Okay.
[49:18] Keith: Uh It was an odd but fun sensation to have someone tease you while you had no idea what she was doing.
[49:27] Keith: Okay. One problem that we ran into was our differences in height. I'm a bit taller than her and she has some trouble when it came to fucking
[49:32] Keith: to the fucking portion of the event. She said that she would be right back and then I heard some furniture being moved around
[49:50] Keith: after we were done. I found out that she had to get on her highest heels and used to chair to heighten it further. We both just collapsed on the floor and laughed about how fun it was. She thanked me and I made a comment that she did all the work all in all. It was a great experience. And I think that we will do it again in the future. So anyone else tried something like this before? If so, do you have any recommendations or advice to enhance this experience in the future?
[49:51] Keith: Thanks for being
[49:55] Mike: My advice is do not do that to a guy. Do not. The number one
[50:00] Keith: comment is great idea. So going to try this.
[50:03] Keith: Damn. I wish my boyfriend would think of something like that. That sounds so hot.
[50:04] Keith: Yeah.
[50:06] Keith: That
[50:10] Keith: I I don't think women want this.
[50:13] Mike: Yeah. I mean it's like you're taking the
[50:17] Mike: most compelling part of it for the woman in your tape. You're deleting it.
[50:19] Keith: It's removing any intimacy.
[50:22] Mike: Exactly. Exactly.
[50:30] Mike: Yeah. I mean, uh and I mean like there's an element, I mean, yeah. Why did he have to turn into a haunted house also why did he have to shut the lights off?
[50:35] Mike: He's like, I'm gonna make this is creepy. It's not gonna make you not sure who's back there.
[50:36] Mike: Right.
[50:37] Keith: Right.
[50:39] Keith: Yeah.
[50:41] Keith: Why
[50:46] Keith: our glory holes such a compelling thing? Is it is it is it compelling?
[50:49] Keith: Okay, so we've discussed for you are
[50:51] Keith: less
[50:56] Keith: attracted by intimacy that I am our glory holes? Like
[51:00] Keith: presuming it's it's an actual woman. Is that something that seems compelling to you?
[51:08] Mike: Um, okay, so, so you're putting me in the role of the guy sticking his dick through the glory hole?
[51:12] Keith: Um, and you know, it's a woman on the other side, there's no mystery about who the person is.
[51:17] Mike: Well, I mean, it could be a woman and still be someone really unappetizing on appealing.
[51:19] Mike: Um,
[51:22] Mike: but okay, so yeah, like let's say it's somebody
[51:30] Mike: Yeah, right. It's no, it's, it's totally uncompelling because even as someone who's less interested in intimacy,
[51:35] Mike: I would still assuming it's a woman who's compelling, I would want to interact with her
[51:36] Mike: body
[51:41] Mike: and so like I think that, so, okay, so what I think Gloria was are primarily for is
[51:43] Mike: there is an entire
[51:45] Mike: subset of men
[51:48] Mike: who want to give blows
[51:52] Mike: and I know this, we've discussed this before, like if you like
[51:55] Mike: in the sort of grinder type community,
[52:07] Mike: there is there is a surplus of men wanting to give blows, not get blows in the sort of grinder media and I know this from like several conversations of at and like looking myself and like it's true
[52:10] Mike: and it makes it makes some sense to me because it's like
[52:16] Mike: why does it make sense to me? It makes sense to me, because I think there's a lot of bi-curious men out there
[52:22] Mike: who want to give a blow to a guy and so since they're way more hetero guys than gay guys,
[52:30] Mike: it doesn't take that many bi-curious hetero, otherwise hetero guys wanting to give a blow to wind up with a surplus of guys wanting to give blows,
[52:39] Mike: okay, then on the flip side you have like, well why would the guy I want to stick his dick through the glory hole? And I think there it's just you have a man who's unattractive,
[52:44] Mike: right? It's like, look like you just have a guy who may be unattractive slash maybe it's like a guy who
[52:50] Mike: is in a totally sexless situation in his life and he's like, look this is a way to get a blow right, so it's like a guy who's part of
[52:52] Keith: don't you think?
[52:53] Keith: Okay?
[52:58] Keith: Do you think that you could tell if the person on the other side was a man or a woman?
[52:58] Keith: Oh
[52:59] Mike: God.
[53:00] Mike: Um
[53:02] Mike: Mhm.
[53:03] Mike: I think let's let's
[53:14] Keith: start with, let's start with an easier question. Let's say you're you're blindfolded, but you're kissing someone and this person is very clean shaven, so you can't feel any stubble. Do you think you can tell that I'm
[53:18] Mike: positive? You can't And I know that because really there are men who get,
[53:24] Mike: I don't want to say the word fool is strong, but there are men who like wind up in like the sort of crying game situation with a
[53:34] Mike: transsexual, right? That happens to men. Now. I mean like yeah, where it's not revealed in an appropriate way and they kiss and all this stuff and then they like discover later that it's actually uh
[53:36] Mike: well, yeah, but a lot of those,
[53:39] Keith: a lot of trans folks have had
[53:40] Keith: various
[53:45] Keith: surgeries, but yeah, I guess that wouldn't really affect like jaw line and stuff.
[54:03] Mike: I mean also like if you just go on chatter bait and you like go to the transsexual, like they're basically two categories of transsexuals. You see there. I mean it's of course broader than that. But there's two main categories. There's guys that are just obviously men, like they're making very little effort in my view. But then there's this other category of transsexuals that are ones where it's like, you're not. It's like, I think you sent me recently a
[54:06] Mike: picture off Tinder of someone that fooled me.
[54:10] Keith: Yeah, I mean it's I've been fooled the number of times on Tinder.
[54:12] Keith: In fact, it happens
[54:17] Keith: often enough now that when I get matched with somebody who
[54:27] Keith: is younger and more attractive than I typically would, I always have to like do like a little bit of forensics to find out to see if to see if they're trans or not.
[54:35] Mike: Yeah. So in that case, like, I mean, honestly, I think that, okay, so here's what I would say about that. I think that it is totally possible.
[54:46] Mike: It would, I think that it would be totally possible for a man to go on a date with someone they think is a woman get a blow from them, no blindfold just to blow from them and never realized that it was a
[54:49] Mike: person with a penis.
[54:50] Keith: I mean,
[54:52] Keith: I don't know.
[54:54] Keith: I don't know.
[54:59] Mike: Well, I mean the way you would tell would be right legs and shock. Right?
[55:03] Keith: Sure. But like what about like the Adam's apple?
[55:09] Mike: Uh, I don't know. I mean maybe maybe people that are more inclined to run adam's apples.
[55:21] Keith: You've seen these tests or read the, read the studies where like they show people a picture for 1/10 of a second and you have to say if it's a man or a woman and people can do it with like 99 accuracy or whatever.
[55:26] Mike: Yeah. But I mean if you look, I got fooled by someone using me too. I
[55:29] Keith: I think there's a long tail of like
[55:33] Keith: female presenting trans men. But like
[55:36] Mike: okay, but they are
[55:41] Mike: the question you were actually asking was like, let's let's say it's not a man who's transsexual. Let's say it's just a man.
[55:45] Mike: Yeah. And you're in a glory hole situation. Could I tell if a man or a woman,
[55:48] Keith: let's get back to the, can you tell with your penis whether it's a man?
[55:58] Mike: I think I would only be able to tell if there was facial hair. I think if there's no facial hair, I do not think in a glory hole situation. I could tell, Let me be clear though. I would not do a glory hole
[55:59] Mike: because
[56:02] Mike: because I am really,
[56:05] Mike: I am afraid of the glory hole guillotine.
[56:06] Mike: Well,
[56:07] Mike: like,
[56:08] Mike: sorry,
[56:26] Mike: like I just can't, I'm never going to put my dick through a hole because something crazy could happen on the other side of that whole and like to be like, oh well you can, you know, the police will come get them. It's like, look, meanwhile I don't have a dick. It's not worth it, right? Like, look, I'd rather just pay like the $25 or whatever it costs to be able to see the person
[56:29] Mike: ramat in life.
[56:31] Keith: Okay.
[56:32] Keith: I did not.
[56:35] Keith: I know that there was such a thing until
[56:40] Mike: you mentioned it. I just made it up. But like, but it's obviously possible. Right?
[56:44] Mike: Okay, hang on, are you saying that if you
[56:50] Mike: we're gonna go stick your dick in a glory hole would never even occur to you that someone could be over there with a piece of a pair of scissors.
[56:51] Mike: Uh huh.
[56:52] Mike: It would occur to me.
[56:53] Keith: Okay.
[57:01] Keith: I guess I have not done that much thinking about glory holes. Yes. I mean of course now that you mention it, I'm sure if I was in that situation there would be great trepidation.
[57:09] Keith: Yes. Like, first of all, why am I in this situation in the first place? What decisions have have led to this one is like, it's like
[57:15] Mike: an episode of quantum leap, right? Like just zap in and you're about to stick your dick in the glory. It's
[57:17] Keith: like what happened before now
[57:19] Mike: to make the sicker.
[57:21] Keith: Um
[57:25] Keith: So yeah, I don't know like
[57:32] Keith: we were we we speculated about this ted episodes ago, but yeah, is the is the gap from lip to throat
[57:37] Keith: significantly larger than men? Like is there something else in the man's mouth because their tongue
[57:41] Keith: more rough? Or is there some other
[57:46] Mike: probably, but I just don't think your cock is going to be. I mean, you just don't have that kind of tactile response. I mean like,
[57:53] Mike: yeah, I mean there there are things that you, but, but I just think like, I'm not sure if anybody's ever actually like, study this would be hard to study it,
[57:55] Mike: but for obvious reasons. But
[58:00] Mike: yeah, like, I I think I don't think you would be able to tell, but that being said
[58:09] Mike: like there's nothing there a number of reasons why this is a weird thing this person did, but one of them is that Gloria the person on the other side, the glory hole is always a man and like, you need to know that
[58:15] Mike: it's never a woman, even in spite of what's shown in porn, in spite of what this guy did
[58:16] Mike: and the woman,
[58:26] Mike: she, she's bravo to her like God bless her for playing along. But like that's not like I know and I realized there's a commenter whose purportedly female being like,
[58:31] Mike: I can't wait for my boyfriend do this. Like I think the vast majority of women would be horrified
[58:35] Mike: if you were like, hey, hey, I've got a shower curtain, I'm gonna, I'm gonna cut a,
[58:45] Mike: it's like, it's like dick in a box. It's exactly like dick in a box. Like the whole reason dick in a box is funny because no woman, nobody ever want in a box.
[58:48] Keith: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think you should take
[58:55] Keith: as truth. There is any kind of signal things you read from, like the seventh commenter on a sex up reddit thread,
[58:58] Keith: uh, just as a general you tell overall,
[59:02] Keith: yeah. Okay. I promised a listener that we would,
[59:08] Keith: we're running out of time here. But I promised listener we would do this. How come women use large dildos?
[59:10] Keith: Ah,
[59:18] Keith: somebody wrote in, this is short question. How come most women seem fine with average sized penises, yet most still those are much larger than average
[59:23] Keith: on my journey to become more comfortable with myself. This is something I've been wondering.
[59:24] Keith: And then
[59:28] Keith: I thought the first comment thread here was particularly,
[59:30] Keith: I don't know something.
[59:35] Keith: So the first person says, well, you have to remember, we need something to hold onto. If I get a six inch dildo,
[59:39] Keith: it would all disappear with nothing to hold onto. So that's an interesting
[59:41] Mike: point.
[59:44] Mike: So then this, but that ignores girth. Go on. Right,
[59:52] Keith: Okay. Yeah. And then the uh the original poster says, so would you say you use around six that's bigger than average, but everyone is different.
[59:56] Keith: And then the person says to be honest, I probably use a dildo closer to seven,
[60:06] Keith: and then the original poster says this makes me feel bad. And then the other person says why? Then the original poster says nothing to do with you. I just feel like I'm not enough for some people.
[60:14] Keith: And then this person says real penis of any size is always better than a fake one. And then this guy says ha ha thank you. That is nice to hear.
[60:18] Keith: Why did she she just wanted to try to make them feel better? That's obviously not true.
[60:19] Keith: Mhm.
[60:21] Mike: Well, I think it is true. Maybe it's
[60:25] Keith: roughly true as a rule, but it's not literally true. Well
[60:29] Mike: look, I mean in the in the
[60:32] Mike: how do I say this in my world where
[60:40] Mike: most where where female orgasms from P. I. Ve only without clitoral stimulation is sort of rare.
[60:49] Mike: Uh caveat. What is an orgasm caveat? All these stupid caveats I have to throw in there because of being yelled at by many women.
[60:51] Mike: Um
[61:00] Mike: But like generally like women like like the in and out penetration is not that compelling, it's like a part of the experience. Okay so I have a couple of things to say about this first of all
[61:01] Mike: length. Okay
[61:04] Mike: okay if you were going to make a dildo
[61:08] Mike: you wouldn't make it three inches long because someone want women wanted longer than three inches right
[61:15] Mike: Now the woman you're gonna have to insert the whole thing, she can insert it to her desired depth. So if it's 27 long
[61:28] Mike: it's not gonna really matter, right? So it makes sense to me. The woman would buy one that's like maybe eight or nine inches long. Yes, she has to grip it. But still even the part, like, let's, let's assume the dildos, some dildos have, like a ball sack for some reason.
[61:30] Mike: Yeah, balzac equivalent.
[61:43] Mike: Uh yeah, some bulge. They're, you know, they're gonna they're gonna jam it into the desired depth, which will probably be kind of like, so that it nestles above or under the cervix and kind of fills them up, whatever. Okay, so they're gonna go for that. And then in terms of girth,
[61:52] Mike: like, I mean, we see a lot of questions from women, from men, a lot of comments, whatever, where
[62:01] Mike: like, it's pretty clear that women get, get benefit from some additional growth. And so I just think that's like place an area where like, like I think last week we had somebody who was,
[62:12] Mike: whose girlfriend or wife had used a penis or no, he'd used a penis sleeve and she liked a lot better because it was thicker and I think there it's like, look, it's not that surprising to me that a woman wants something sort of thicker.
[62:18] Mike: And then finally on the point of like them saying a penis is better. Well, the reason the penis is better is because,
[62:26] Mike: yeah, like it's an intimate act like they attached to a man, it's the same reason why a guy would say like there's some bastard,
[62:27] Mike: some
[62:33] Mike: garver said ambassador who posts on gone wild tube videos of himself fucking a
[62:34] Mike: flashlight.
[62:40] Mike: Yeah. And it's like, stop it. Yeah, I mean it's and they get zero up votes when he just posts these fucking videos of
[62:44] Mike: himself fucking a flesh light, which no one wants to see.
[62:50] Mike: Um But anyway, like, it's the same for a guy, like the flashlight, like flashlight, I'm sure is really nice,
[62:53] Mike: but you're still going to pick a vagina.
[62:58] Mike: Because and the reason why is because in my experience, like, keith,
[63:04] Mike: you have found that the orgasm intensity that the high, the best orgasm you can have is in a vagina, right?
[63:05] Keith: Yes.
[63:12] Mike: Yeah. And I mean, that's not controversial, right? And my analysis of why that is is not exactly that, like, like,
[63:14] Mike: feels better.
[63:22] Mike: Yeah, It's it's like I I believe that somebody could make a device that simulates it more or less perfectly. It's that your brain,
[63:28] Mike: like there's some sort of feedback loop in your brain when you like, see that you're fucking impregnating a woman, it feels better,
[63:31] Mike: right? Like your brain makes the orgasm better.
[63:43] Mike: Uh And it's the same thing, right? The woman, like the sex feels better when it's an actual human male because that's like, you know what sex is for? And so like a dildo is never gonna replace that. But that being said, like it makes sense to me. They would be longer and thicker.
[63:54] Keith: Yeah. I think there's some massive discount applied to devices that aren't attached to a human rights. I don't know what the discount factor is, but it's it's enormous.
[63:55] Mike: Yeah.
[64:01] Mike: So they don't vibrate. I mean, most women masturbate externally anyway. They don't like dildos don't
[64:04] Mike: play a major role in most masturbation.
[64:06] Keith: Most women use a vibrator.
[64:21] Mike: That's right. Or their fingers. But they're not they're not stopping often. Yeah. They're not jackhammering jackhammering themselves typically. Uh Notwithstanding the fact that I know that like we've had, do we have a woman who said she like sat on the bedpost or something?
[64:23] Mike: I don't know. I don't really want to back.
[64:27] Keith: Yeah. We have quite a library here.
[64:30] Keith: Yeah. And and over ourselves.