Your Mileage May Vary: Arousing Adventures With Ally: Rating Sex, Orgasm Advice, Masturbation Technique, Odd Behaviors

Episode Transcript

Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.

[00:00] Mike: Did that? Okay, it's recording now it doesn't have the original stuff he says it's beginning I have to make it up right? Hello and welcome to your mileage may vary. This is mike keith is in Guatemala he's organizing another migrant caravan. To bring more people to the texas border but I'm here today with Allie say hello to the audience Allie great ah, and keith will be back at some point once he's completed his mission.
[00:23] Ally: Hey glad to be back.
[00:34] Mike: Ah, so Allie and I are going to go through some topics today but before we get into that I want to let you listeners know that we can you can email us at ymvpod at gmail dot com ah another thing that's super helpful is to review and rate the podcast on. The apple podcasts app or whatever app you use? Um, and we love getting feedback. Um, so send us feedback and maybe we'll ask your questions on air. Um, and so I mean that's pretty much it. We're ready to start here Allie you texted me a topic that we can start with here. Ah, before we get into our traditional video viewing. So I'm going to read it off my phone here and maybe we can talk about it. You said you have a general question around what contributes to how you would rate a sexual encounter or could you even reliably rank all your partnered sex in that way from zero to 10 is it purely physical teachable things like position breast size whatever and are there more or less quantifiable elements. What would be the variance for a given partner. You're you're obviously pretty neurotic here. You're you're worried how you would rate. Um.
[01:42] Ally: And no I'm interested in you know is it something that can improve over time or as seems to be the case with Keith is it solely based on novelty and it'll inevitably decline.
[01:53] Mike: Yeah I should warn you that Keith so we can yeah we can briefly touch on on how Keith would respond you said you had some ideas I mean he ah we we have to be careful with Keith because Keith doesn't like Keith doesn't like it when um I say on the show that of course he's not here to stop me. But he doesn't like it when I say that he ah he prefers novelty over everything else because like let's say he's dating someone then like you just imagine they're listening to the podcast together and she immediately starts slapping him or something right? yeah.
[02:24] Ally: Right? I feel like listening to the podcast is the only way that people keith is dating can gain the upper hand though because he explicitly says that he can only have sex with someone like 5 times before he loses interest and they should know that.
[02:39] Mike: That's rough. Ah um, I'm glad I'm glad I didn't say that. Ah maybe yeah I mean um and I don't yeah I don't really understand that. Ah that prodilection that he he claims to have um but.
[02:51] Ally: Oh.
[02:55] Mike: So so yeah, so I mean I guess like his answer we can answer as his proxy here. Um that maybe he would say novelty. Um, but you're I think you're yeah you, youre your.
[03:02] Ally: Yeah, I'm guessing he would say novelty and cleanliness and maybe something around sort of ethnicity and body type. But I think for him it would be mostly novelty whereas I would say for me, you know, novelty.
[03:18] Mike: Um, yeah I mean it's so.
[03:20] Ally: Is negatively correlated usually sex gets better with the same person over time. But you know usually the first time is not as good.
[03:30] Mike: Right? Um, hang on a second here Allie something happened with my headphones that I have to deal with up we back? Yes, my other headphones grabbed my connection I have to write down that I have to snip this out of the code of the.
[03:48] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
[03:49] Mike: Ah, you there. Okay, let me write down what the point in time is when this happened yeah I have multiple headphones actually right before we started I was having a problem with this. The headphones were like not working properly and it just did that to me again. Okay.
[04:01] Ally: Oh yeah.
[04:04] Mike: So like it switched to my other headphones and switched back on the bluetooth. Okay so four minutes snip out. Okay.
[04:05] Ally: Yeah, yeah, there are so many problems with the bluetooth protocol like it is very aggressive in connecting.
[04:12] Mike: Yeah, it's weird. Okay, so all right? So I'll just start again. Um yeah, so anyway Keith ah has his has his predilections. Um, but yeah I mean look.
[04:26] Ally: M.
[04:30] Mike: I think I think our audience would be interested in knowing how you as a female rate men on this score first. So how do you I mean is is this something that you think about.
[04:38] Ally: Somewhat I mean so certainly the first time having sex with someone is usually not as good as subsequent times but in answer to kind of the middle question I don't think I could reliably rate each encounter you know on a scale from 1 to 10 and I think I have more. General buckets of you know, bad, decent and then very good or I guess maybe just you know 1 2 and 3 um some of it I mean body type certainly contributes to it and things like you know penis size contributes to it.
[05:08] Mike: Mope. Yeah.
[05:16] Ally: But.
[05:17] Mike: Let's start on that. Ah, the second 1 there. So how does penis size contribute to it.
[05:21] Ally: I think I think we brought this up before it has to be you know, above a certain length. There's There's a a kind of floor below which it's not going to be enjoyable.
[05:33] Mike: Why is that? what's the I actually genuinely thought and I don't remember this from last time this super specifically. But I thought you were going to say Girth what? why? why? What is? what? Yeah why does the length matter.
[05:46] Ally: Curth Also I don't know they're usually correlated I think I hope they're correlated.
[05:50] Mike: Well you but like I'm I'm just talking like purely is it is this is this. You want this certain image. You want it to look a certain way or is this because you want.
[05:55] Ally: No, no, it's about how it feels I think you don't feel kind of fully penetrated. You don't feel completely filled up until it gets to a certain length.
[06:07] Mike: And you can't tell whether that dimension is length or Girth or both that actually accomplishes that.
[06:12] Ally: Yeah I mean I I guess I have more experience with variation in length and variation in Girth like I can't think of many very skinny penises. But.
[06:20] Mike: So Seriously for I mean I think like you. Okay, so so let's set aside growth so you're you're you sort of you're saying. There's like some sort of typical Median girth that you typically deal with so can you give us an idea of like long medium short like what are the different. What are the different experiences for you.
[06:39] Ally: I Feel like short is kind of anything below five inches. Maybe.
[06:43] Mike: Sure but what happens to you like what? how do you? How how to how's your experience differ when when it's only a 4 or 5 like keith size. Oh no I'm I'm I'm I'm certain that he's still keith doesn't lie about things like this typically.
[06:47] Ally: Oh well like of right? Yeah, ah we presume neither of us I think has seen have you seen Keith's penis though.
[07:01] Mike: Only only like in the shower after we were like swimming at a swimming pool and stuff like that nothing. It's so nothing. You know it was very cold.
[07:05] Ally: Ok, ok, right? right? Not at its at its peak performance. Um, well I have never even seen that so I can't say but I guess what happens is you know a full thrust doesn't feel like it kind of reaches all the way in.
[07:22] Mike: Okay, so you actually might find yourself being like are are you all the way in like wondering that is he all the way in like that kind of.
[07:23] Ally: If it's not long enough.
[07:28] Ally: Well, you can feel I guess that he's all the way in because you feel his sort of pubic bone. Whatever hit against you like you know that he cannot thrust farther but you don't feel correspondingly like his penis all the way inside you? yeah.
[07:35] Mike: Okay.
[07:42] Mike: And so there's some sensation like kind of closer to like your liver or something that you're lacking right.
[07:49] Ally: Ah, no, your liver is so much higher than um now I think the sensation is like around your survey.
[07:51] Mike: All right? Ah, you're a okay so you need that like that's there's something missing there. You're like oh there's there's some is it like I'm trying to understand because for it from a guy's perspective. This is not second nature is this like um.
[07:58] Ally: Yeah.
[08:06] Ally: Um, well have you ever thrust it into someone and felt like there was extra room that you weren't reaching.
[08:10] Mike: Is this like.
[08:17] Mike: How I mean that's you're asking like a negative right? It's like have you have you ever I mean I like I'm on the longer side. Oh my lord. Oh my Lord he's gonna love this but the ah.
[08:21] Ally: Yeah, sure. Ok yeah, because like Keith feels that every time I say like the tip of his penis never touches anything. Yeah.
[08:35] Mike: Yeah I mean I'm on the longer side. So the experience that I typically have is more ah it is's yeah well I mean it sounds like it sounds like you're a genius. So you'rere you're angling here for some some some dick pics I Frankly I think you are actually asking for dick pics.
[08:37] Ally: Ah, again I cannot verify this either but sure sure yeah.
[08:52] Ally: I Think you and Keith need to both compare so that you can independently verify.
[08:54] Mike: The. I think I Just don't know why we would lie about this but but okay, so like yeah, so um, yeah, the experience that I have is much more of the oh it's too much so it's causing pain like I don't know what that pain would be I Assume you've experienced that as well where it's like.
[09:00] Ally: I.
[09:10] Ally: Right? right? yeah.
[09:16] Mike: You're getting your cervix beat up by something right.
[09:16] Ally: Um, yeah I would say really it only hurt you know, maybe in one encounter or something. Um.
[09:24] Mike: Okay, so you actually like sort of like or let me put sorry let me turn this around you. Well you say it only heard in one encounter but in many encounters I take it with larger men. Actually it was good. You liked that sort of okay so you're 1 of those and I say 1 of those.
[09:36] Ally: Um, yeah, yeah.
[09:43] Mike: In a nice way because on the sex sub. There are women who are like yeah I like more sort of action deeper sounds like that work for you.
[09:47] Ally: Yeah I mean I suspect so you know I've also heard women say that for some of them. Um, you know, kind Ofologicalal Exams or Pap smears are very painful. They've never been painful at all for me. So I feel.
[10:06] Mike: I have another technical mistake. you're you're muted there's like a little mute button on the ah me sorry go ahead, just go ahead. It was my fault it was because I was trying to mute myself so I could cough but usually I'm the second one and so I just did it reflexively.
[10:12] Ally: Hey sorry I don't know how that happened.
[10:19] Ally: Yeah, that's ok, um, yes I think for some women Pa smears and gyneological Sams are really painful. That's never been painful for me. So I think maybe my cervix is less sensitive and they less prone to pain than than others. So.
[10:22] Mike: Okay, ten minutes there's another 1 we want to fix these today. Okay so go on.
[10:36] Mike: Do you ever use like a very large object when you're playing with your by yourself. Okay, you have no okay and just just so what you've you've never used an object.
[10:38] Ally: More enjoyable.
[10:42] Ally: No I don't I don't use an object at all I have tried that it's not no I like I think I tried a vibrator that had sort of a dildo like appendage once and I didn't.
[10:59] Mike: But even though that's that's surprising considering that you're saying that you do care about the size in this way.
[10:59] Ally: Like that and so didn't try it again.
[11:07] Ally: Yeah I mean that's why I like partnered sex more than mastur. You know I find it it does. It is not a good replacement.
[11:16] Mike: And I take it so 1 of the topics that's come up a few times on the show is men who use these like sleeves to make their penis larger have you ever done that? okay.
[11:22] Ally: Right? No I've never even seen 1 of those I googled the egg that keith was talking about which was interesting. Oh ok, ok oh and't? No yeah I don't even know what the sleeves look like.
[11:30] Mike: That's not a sleeve to make it larger. That's just like some sort of a masturbation boy. But but okay, yeah, but I mean like that's a of course that you you might be 1 of these 1 a woman who would have who would actually have this problem where if the guy used such a sleeve like he would never be able to. Kind of compete right.
[11:47] Ally: Maybe well That's the thing though I mean that goes back to the question of what is the variance maybe between counters with the same partner I think the variance for me is is fairly low. Um, and that I think if if sex is good with someone. It's usually good. You know.
[12:06] Mike: And what is what does make it good. What what makes it good for you. Is it mostly like the emotional content or the kind of like interplay like the sort of how how you feel about the person or is there actually like specific actions. The person takes that like may you know, kind of amp up the the level.
[12:06] Ally: If it's not. There's not very much room to improve.
[12:22] Ally: Yeah, no I think a lot of it is emotional in the way that I feel about the person or the way that the person is reacting you know like is he making noise is he saying things and indicate that he is enjoying it. Um, yeah I think it's it's less about technique.
[12:24] Mike: For you.
[12:39] Mike: That's interesting that you immediately. It's interesting that you immediately went to whether the guy is enjoying it not to whether you know what I mean like it's sort of like this thing of like you, you're looking for him. It's It's sort of his show then right you want him to have fun.
[12:43] Ally: Um.
[12:50] Ally: Yeah, because it's self reinforcing like hearing someone else enjoying something thingss actually kind of turns me on and I think vice versa I seem that's why you know guys want to hear a woman like moaning or want to feel that she's.
[13:07] Mike: I Actually prefer just to have like the the sounds that cam girls make when they pretend to be enjoying sex. That's actually I I've been conditioned to like that through extensive online sort of an unpartnered experiences. Yeah.
[13:07] Ally: Actively participating.
[13:13] Ally: Um, okay, yeah. Ah, you just yeah, you wear like over the ear noise canceling headphones while you're having sex that you can just pipe in your preferred audio soundtrack.
[13:29] Mike: It's true I mean I I would like literally at this point. Ah I actually have somewhat stronger orgasms when listening to a woman speaking Bulgarian or russian because yeah, because that's what I'm so used to on the cam cams. So.
[13:43] Ally: You're good.
[13:47] Mike: Yeah I would try to do it an impression but I can't I wouldn't be able to do it justice. My my vocabulary is not strong enough. Um, okay, so yeah I mean I think that So yes I mean for Keith like the answer to this question probably revolves around novelty I think that the more normal answer you would get from a guy is um, ah.
[13:48] Ally: A.
[13:58] Ally: Are the.
[14:06] Mike: Is similar to the answer that you gave where it's like the um, the extent to which like the partner is the woman is enjoying it like involved her willingness to try things. Um I think that ah I think that 1 that I've heard a lot of times from guys.
[14:16] Ally: O.
[14:23] Mike: And this you see on the sex subreddit a lot too is like if she actually is involved is she like is she doing things other than just sort of letting you letting you penetrate her right in other words like how engaged is she so like.
[14:32] Ally: A youth.
[14:38] Mike: Like a common complaint as well as a common like sort of compliment is like oh you know she actually like took maybe not took control exactly but like cared about what happened exactly in such a way that like showed that she was like involved. But.
[14:50] Ally: Yeah, so what kinds of things. Do you want your partner to do.
[14:54] Mike: Ah I mean yes, so like so like the the the 1 that gets complained about is like the woman who just literally like lies there and is like is like okay you know I'm just gonna lie here and like kind of close my eyes and and and that's ah frankly, like kind of common. Ah for women women to do that. Um, at least.
[15:02] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
[15:09] Ally: Um, oh ok, not with Keith Apparently with Keith everyone is loudly enthusiastic.
[15:14] Mike: Some of the time. Um. Well with Keith I Think what's going on is the women feel the need to they're trying to win him because he's sort of in that upper I know that you have a difference about this. But he's but in in the real World. He's in the upper sort of decile of attractiveness of men and so they're like oh I need to like amp it up in order to score this guy who's sort of like high status guy but for a guy who's like more normally status I don't think they would try as hard necessarily. Um.
[15:37] Ally: Um I see yeah.
[15:50] Mike: Also Keith has may embellish sometimes exactly what happens in his encounters. Yeah.
[15:52] Ally: Right? Of course when you are in a position that you're going to stay in for a little while. Do you want to be the 1 doing the thrusting or do you want the woman to be like thrusting against you or both I feel like it's very hard to time when you're both trying to do it.
[16:07] Mike: I Think that like as a guy like I mean women aren't very good at that. So so I mean I mean ah do you do you find yourself doing a lot of thrusting.
[16:11] Ally: Um, right? yeah. No I mean I guess only when I'm on top. But even then maybe seventy five percent of the time and the other kind of twenty five percent of the time I can kind of you know, stay in 1 position on top and he will thrust up.
[16:29] Mike: Right? So I mean there's not a well in I mean like that. What do? what do you think about that position when the guy's sort of thrusting up like that I Always think that's kind of weird looking in a por say.
[16:38] Ally: Oh yeah, so I guess I've never seen it only been in it. But um I don't think so I mean only from like my vantage point I'm really mostly seeing like his face right? yeah.
[16:43] Mike: Never seen it interesting. This has something to do with like your weird masturbating to like imagining you're being had had your way with had you're being had.
[16:56] Ally: Yeah.
[16:59] Mike: As a group of amish men are having sex with you like this is your sort of weird. Oh my God I forgot I forgot. Yeah.
[17:00] Ally: No I am I am an amish man having sex with a group of amish women. Yeah um, but in those imaginings you're correct I Usually do not imagine myself being on bottom but thrusting up I guess it could look weird. Yeah I don't know.
[17:14] Mike: Well it it looks sort of unpleasurable or sort of almost unpleasant to me because it's like the it's the guys having to like put in a lot of effort. It's sort of ungainly and like ah yeah, it's like it's like oh I can say why because it's like I think for a guy there's something about.
[17:17] Ally: N. Um.
[17:33] Mike: Like thrusting into something that's a little bit immobile right? And so if she's up. She's going to naturally bounce up higher when you're thrusting up and so it feels like it just feels like you're not going to sort of get all the way there. Um, but yeah I think that generally the the real answer here is that enthusiasm.
[17:34] Ally: Um, right? Yeah yeah, okay that makes sense.
[17:52] Mike: Is the ah is the marker both directions that men sort of are going to rate and like yeah and like willingness to try different things and also like yeah I mean like if if you look I mean if you're interested if you're more interested in the partner I think it's going to rate higher can you? Yeah can you rate individual encounters Sure I mean I think so.
[17:53] Ally: And.
[18:01] Ally: And.
[18:10] Mike: But like yeah I agree also that it's going to kind of blend a bit together and look in novelty novelty is probably more valuable to a man than a woman although it probably I mean I don't know like is keith always says because keith is dates around quite a lot that ah.
[18:23] Ally: Um.
[18:27] Mike: For both partners like the first couple times is much more exciting and I mean wouldn't wouldn't you agree with that for the woman as well.
[18:32] Ally: Um, I think they no I guess not I think the exciting part is that it is actually happening but that the sex itself the first or even second time is usually not as good as it becomes later when you're more comfortable with each other and not trying to. You know, look good all the time or do everything correctly.
[18:54] Mike: Say more about that. You're trying to look you feel like you have an obligation to look good so that what he won't it won't turn into a one night stand
[19:01] Ally: Um I guess yeah or that like the first couple of times you're still kind of shy and trying to impress each other.
[19:09] Mike: Do you think the guy usually feels that way or is he just getting his his nut out. It's true look.
[19:13] Ally: Um, no, not always? Um, yeah yeah I I think I I can see how maybe the first time would be more exciting for the guy. But I think there is some reciprocal. You know, trying to impress each other and um, maybe not being completely at ease with each other.
[19:40] Mike: All right? but I mean like the main thing that you hear is that like look the man is always going to orgasm the first time and the woman almost never does right right? because you're not, you're not comfortable enough with the person. This is.
[19:47] Ally: Right? And I think that's true. Yeah, yeah, yeah I think where variety comes in for me is that I like a variety of locations I think that you know later on in a relationship or something or you know subsequent. Encounters or something that can provide just as much sort of variety. Even if it's with the same partner.
[20:10] Mike: So that you mean like you you mean different locations of the house like you you start getting interested in like giving the guy a blowjob while sitting on a toilet things like that.
[20:18] Ally: So never that yeah different yeah different locations of the house or you know outside in a car like in a hotel room. So yeah I think that is exciting I don't think I've ever had sex on a roof either I tend not.
[20:26] Mike: On the roof or.
[20:32] Mike: When I mean are you talking like on the kitchen floor is that and that makes a difference to you. You're like oh this is good I've I've been wanting to have sex right here.
[20:35] Ally: Sure, yeah, yeah, that would be good. Right? Every time I strode across this floor previously carrying groceries I thought what? if yeah I think different location makes it seem you know more urgent like makes it a little bit hotter. You know how memory is tied to place to There's like the retrosplinial cortex in the brain that is that forms location based memories and so I think that you're in a new location it it kind of records in your mind is something new.
[21:09] Mike: I Have never once during sex thought of my retro splinial complex now whereex my bad. Yeah, that's right, That's right, all right? So let why don't we move on to watching ah the porn we will. Um.
[21:15] Ally: Cortex Yeah, well now you will so I should figure out what that is in Bulgarian and then come crazy.
[21:25] Ally: And.
[21:28] Mike: We will put this in the show notes I will I guess so that people can people can follow along allie you have the url up on your screen. Don't you? Okay so I'm going to count it down. Do you want? Why? not do you want to narrate what happens in this porn. This will be great. It's only about 29 seconds long we will I will say 3 2 1 and then we'll.
[21:32] Ally: Yes, yes.
[21:38] Ally: Um, ok. Um, okay, all right? yes.
[21:47] Mike: Play and are you ready all right 3 2 1 play.
[21:52] Ally: Mine is buffering. Ok there we go ok so they're in Dogie style on a bed. There's a very scrawny man behind a woman whose head is down and he's kind of.
[22:07] Mike: Oof.
[22:10] Ally: Playing with her hair and there's a laugh track for some reason is that I don't know why Oh ok.
[22:16] Mike: I think they're watching tv all right? So it for me it repeated. So let let me bring a couple things toe your attention here. There's a couple things so I mean 1 is that yeah they're in the sort of traditional doggy position where her a lot of the time her head is sort of down. He.
[22:22] Ally: Um, Okay, yeah. Um, yeah, yeah, you can't really see her face until the very end when he's kind of like pulling her hair up and then you see her profile but I I can't even tell like you know what ethnicity she is or what she looks like. So.
[22:34] Mike: Yes, music.
[22:40] Mike: Sure she you know he yeah and they're showing they're showing the angle as you're so you're looking from her head toward his torso and and there are several things like he's not very attractive. He looks like maybe somebody put out some cigarettes on his chest recently.
[22:48] Ally: And. Um, yeah, he has like a round scar on his peck. Yeah.
[22:58] Mike: Yeah, something something a little weird sometimes you know yeah the attractiveness of the man in Porn doesn't really matter that much. In fact I think it can be a positive to a point if the guy's less attractive because then it's like oh there's there's hope for the rest of us to ah get this attractive woman. Okay, so I.
[23:06] Ally: Um, yeah, yeah, yeah, there is a subreddit called like 1 hot 1 not which takes that to the extreme I think.
[23:17] Mike: That's 1 I have not seen that's a good 1 So there's a couple things there's another way there's 1 other thing I wanted to note here and why don't we I wanted to ask you about this. So ah the if you there's parts of it when you can see because she's on her elbows and her knees not on her hands and knees. So she's low enough and.
[23:24] Ally: Yeah.
[23:30] Ally: Um, yeah, um.
[23:36] Mike: Her breasts are sort of hanging down now in this position is the woman aware of like say her nipples grazing against the bed is that something that drives she drives pleasure from or is that just irrelevant.
[23:47] Ally: Yeah, no, you can that can be pleasurable. Yeah.
[23:51] Mike: Is it So is it I I it is It is it a thing where you might actually try to keep them at a level such that they're going back and forth grazing there or is that not something you would strive to do in this position. Interesting.
[24:03] Ally: No I think that would be 1 of the benefits to this position. Yeah, and then also kind of you know, being lower the angle of your vaginal canal shift. So that maybe he's hitting like kind of a different part inside. Yeah.
[24:14] Mike: Yes, you you getting the the cervix hammer coming in for you which is works for you. So so the other thing I want to know is what so okay, the thought process of the man in this position is she's letting me do this to her. This is great. Ah.
[24:22] Ally: Ah.
[24:29] Ally: Okay, okay.
[24:34] Mike: Um, I'm very dominant I'm this is pleasurable because there's a you know appropriately tight thing around my penis that is fun to thrust against what is the woman's state of mind in this position. What is she thinking as she's I. In this very submissive position.
[24:52] Ally: So I think that this position feels the best of any position like I would say this is my favorite 1 So. It's also sort of um yeah I Guess it's I I don't want to say it's like the easiest. Like it. You know when you're on your back and your legs are pulled Up. You know that can sometimes over time like cause you know tension or soreness or something in your hips or it's like this is just like a very natural Position. So I feel like she's you know, probably. Enjoying it. It doesn't feel like I was surprised that you said this is something that she lets him do to her because I think you know I think it's great. It's kind of I don't think of it as something that I'm you know, allowing to happen I guess.
[25:40] Mike: That's interesting. So I mean but like I mean just look at the relative positions of their bodies right? I mean she's obviously you know like not in control in the situation like if if if 2 people were had their bodies arranged like this on the street and you saw them I mean of course you'd first be like what.
[25:46] Ally: Um I would assume they were having sex. Yeah yeah.
[25:56] Mike: But okay, but I mean like it's obvious you know other positions are more I mean look okay people on ins various. You know, whatever people in social media will complain about this position because well because it's not intimate, right? It's not like.
[26:06] Ally: Really? oh.
[26:11] Mike: It feels like 1 person doing something to the other person and it looks that way too. But you don't you do not interpret it that way at all.
[26:12] Ally: Um, no I guess not I mean yeah I think the woman's position is more submissive. But um I don't think she's less in control than she would be in Missionary. You know.
[26:31] Mike: Really so in this position I mean you're not you don't have eye contact. So I mean like what do? what do you actually? would you have your eyes closed. What would you be looking at in this position. Okay, so you're ignoring the fact that there's nothing to look at um and.
[26:31] Ally: And she and I think it's right. Yeah I'd probably have my eyes closed. Yeah.
[26:50] Mike: The person's kind of far away from you like if you if you think of like you as being your head They're kind of far away from you right? like their head is far away from yours. So there's like not I mean isn't there like so sort of objectively less intimacy here. Okay.
[26:53] Ally: Ah, yeah.
[27:01] Ally: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[27:05] Mike: And so so so you're focused mostly on the sensations in your crotch got it and why why is this the most pleasurable for you.
[27:07] Ally: Right? Yeah I think it has something to do with angle of penetration. No ah yeah.
[27:15] Mike: So it's not his nuts bouncing against yourclit. Okay, just checking.
[27:26] Ally: I Mean if if you feel that that's usually kind of a secondary sensation. But um, no I think something about I don't want to say something about the way. The vagina is angled but maybe something about the way. My vagina is angled like this ends up being the most pleasurable.
[27:37] Mike: And can you is it possible for you to orgasm in this position without using your hand.
[27:44] Ally: No, probably not.
[27:45] Mike: Okay, so it's pleasurable, but not that intensely so interesting. Yes you So I think I think I think that men generally have difficulty conceptualizing enjoying something that could not bring you to orgasm.
[27:50] Ally: Right? Yeah. Um.
[28:02] Ally: Oh well I mean you enjoy like stretching in the morning right? or you enjoy like a hot shower and that's enjoyment and it's like physical pleasure. It's not orgasm but it can still be like very good right? So yeah I mean if you I guess can translate it into.
[28:05] Mike: Like I'm not sure.
[28:13] Mike: Um, yeah, but it's not erotic pleasure.
[28:21] Ally: Ah, form of erotic pleasure that doesn't that isn't orgasmic but is still very good and there's kind of a spectrum. Ok.
[28:25] Mike: Um I don't think there's a whole lot of that for men like it's like the you know there's it's it's an interesting question I mean it would be like ah yeah I mean the problem I think I think I can I think I can explain why a little bit too like I think it. For a man like it's like if you're not doing something that has that is directionally leading that way like you will actually start to lose your arousal. So like there is there was a question I think last week or the week before about like men giving oral and like losing their erection during that right? and so it's like because for a man. It's like you.
[28:51] Ally: Right? Yeah yeah.
[28:56] Mike: You're either climbing the mountain or you're descending the mountain. There's not a whole lot of like oh I'm going to just sort of stay right here whereas for a woman like that's much more possible and I mean I suppose that's not totally true. It sort of has to be because there's this physical process that that needs to be happening otherwise like the.
[28:57] Ally: Um, yeah, there aren't like lookout points and plateaus along the mountain. It's just 1 trail that's very steep. Yeah.
[29:15] Mike: Your your body part stops functioning the way you want it to or you know the way it's supposed to or expected to Okay so you would be sort of lost in the moment here. You're not thinking yourself, you're and you're certainly not thinking. He's looking at my butthole.
[29:16] Ally: Um, yeah, yeah.
[29:27] Ally: No, in fact I don't even think that he could really see it from that angle like ok, interesting. Okay.
[29:32] Mike: Oh you're 1 of those. Okay yeah, um, so just you know they can they can yeah the man can very clearly see it. Yeah, you not thought about that before.
[29:43] Ally: Um, no I guess not I thought maybe he could see it as he's like initially penetrating but I thought once he's in and thrusting his kind of head is more like over my back and so that he can't see it unless he's kind of contorting his neck down.
[29:56] Mike: Interesting. So maybe we should have watched a porn a p o v porn from the man's position. Band's man's point of view in this position so you could see what what the guy? Yeah I mean to be fair, this guy does appear to be sort of leaning over kind of lurching over her body but that's not actually as common as sort of like.
[30:02] Ally: Right? right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[30:15] Mike: Being more vertically oriented and therefore being able to to see and what do you think about 1 part of this. He sort of grabs her head or your hair he pulls it is that does that work for you.
[30:14] Ally: Um, okay.
[30:24] Ally: Yeah, and I think that he grabs it fairly gently. It doesn't seem like he's like wrenching her head back.
[30:30] Mike: Got it? Yeah, that makes sense. Okay, so you're so you're sort of lost in the moment I Yeah I don't know like I think I think that like men there's a certain. Yeah I mean men are interested in a woman submitting to them.
[30:41] Ally: Um, okay.
[30:44] Mike: So it's like in some ways like it's a negative if you're like oh I just get lost in the moment. The guy wants like I think I think there's a male fantasy around like oh I want you to be like oh I'm letting him do this.
[30:50] Ally: I Think this is a you fantasy as well. We like you want the woman to be slightly uncomfortable. Yeah yeah, you don't want to enjoy it too much. Ah.
[30:56] Mike: When you say you you mean me? probably yeah yes, well look ah look Allie I can make women slightly uncomfortable just by just by interacting with them just by talking to them. It's not.
[31:08] Ally: Ah, right.
[31:12] Mike: Yeah, that fantasy is amazingly easy that with just a cashier or a waitress immediately. Yeah, so I'm always turned on Okay, well so while we're on the topic of ah or rather I mean in relation to the topic of you not having orgasms in this position. Why don't we ah turn to a ah.
[31:14] Ally: Right? Yeah yeah, ah.
[31:32] Mike: Ah, piece of advice posted on Reddit that maybe you could give your feedback on. Um so someone posted advice for women who have trouble orgasming during sex. Ah and of course what they mean is like without using your hand or a vibrator or something like that. Ah, my reaction immediately to this title of course is like.
[31:34] Ally: Um, okay.
[31:44] Ally: Um, and.
[31:50] Mike: Is just like the human condition I know that Keith when he has sex with women. They always have orgasms from Pi V and that's because you can yeah you can emotionally blackmail a woman into ah faking very easily and sort of surprisingly easily if you behave certain ways. Um, so anyway. Okay.
[31:56] Ally: Um, Keith can't tell when a woman is faking are.
[32:09] Mike: Ah, the the post says this I just recently figured out something that has made a world of difference for me during sex and figured I'd share. Hopefully this is the right place to do that. This also might be common knowledge I just don't know about for context I had trouble orgasming with p I v even if me or the guy I'm with is rubbing my klit too. That's interesting for some reason rubbing it wouldn't. Really even do a lot for me despite the fact that I was doing the exact same motion that gets me to finish while masturbating. Well finally well well I figured out that when I masturbate I lie essentially the same position and do exactly the same thing with my hand every single time I'm 20 so I guess that I'm less experienced than others out there. But I just always did it the same for convenience hence when I'm not in that position I actually learned I did. Didn't even know how to get myself off. So her advice is basically try different positions when you masturbate what do you think about this advice Allie. Do you do that.
[32:53] Ally: Yeah, that could be helpful. Um, no I mean I I think I mean I don't I don't think I've ever masturbated like standing up for example and I don't think I've ever masturbated well on all fours. No so perhaps I should try this to.
[33:05] Mike: Really so wait. So so you always you're always reclining on a bed on your back. So you don't You've never tried like a shower head.
[33:13] Ally: Test her advice I'm always reclining. Yeah.
[33:21] Mike: Like a detachable shower head isn't that like a normal.
[33:21] Ally: So no and that's the thing I have heard about this I have never seen anyone using this I don't really understand what it is that they're doing with the shower like are you just blasting water on your clid is that the idea huh.
[33:29] Mike: Really yeah, it's It's sort of like the analog to a vibrator right? like it's going to create vibration.
[33:39] Ally: Yeah, feel like that would either be painful or it wouldn't be pre like it were wouldn't be enough pressure in a single spot. Maybe it's my showerhead is the problem I guess I have 1 of those like rainfall and.
[33:51] Mike: There's another I mean there's another 1 and you can watch there. There are good videos for this There's another position that women use where they lie down in a bathtub and of course you have to be somewhere not that is not California so you don't mind wasting water but you have to well or maybe maybe you just don't care. You're like. In California but you're willing to waste water. Well I mean not Necessari necessari you but the listener here but we have we have listeners all around the world. So if you're in Paris or Romania or something where there're plenty of rivers. So they lie on their back. There's no bulurine listeners. That's that's ah the other direction they they provide me.
[34:06] Ally: My care? Yeah yeah, um.
[34:16] Ally: If you're in public area. Please call. Yeah, okay.
[34:26] Mike: Content. Ah, but you you lie on your back and you turn on the spicet presumably to a temperature that is good for you and then it's just sort of the water falling on your volulva. Never never. There are many women who claim like that's you know that's where they learned how to.
[34:34] Ally: Oh I mean that would not work for me I.
[34:43] Ally: Yeah, no I believe it I'm just saying I don't think that you know that would not be either enough pressure or enough kind of localized pressure I really need something like a finger or you know, ideally a finger. Ah yeah.
[34:44] Mike: Get off.
[34:56] Mike: Do you find that like a tongue can be too little pressure. Oh my goodness. Oh that's right, you don't like receiving oral. You're 1 of those and I forgot about that man. That's that's it's not emasculating. It's something else like usually men.
[35:02] Ally: Yeah, right? yeah.
[35:14] Mike: Men are like oh this is a thing I can do that she's going to love I mean because there's like a lot of guys that don't want to do that. Also so you're like oh this is going to be great and then you're just like now it doesn't work for me I I need I need more Jack hammering.
[35:17] Ally: Ah.
[35:24] Ally: I Guess yeah more more pressure. Yeah um I guess maybe because of this maybe I will try masturbating on all fours to see if that helps with sex. Ah.
[35:27] Mike: Okay.
[35:38] Mike: I mean I think you should I mean you should go all the way and ah get they have they have dildos that have a suction cup that will attach to a tile wall. Be careful when you remove it from the wall. You don't want to pull the tile off of the grout or that not grol. Whatever the the stuff is that glues the tile to the ah to the wall.
[35:49] Ally: Aha. Yeah, yeah.
[35:56] Mike: Ah, but you could do that because you said you like that angle so you could sort of back up against that and then use your hand or a vibrator at the same time I mean you could really enhance your game here and then you could video yourself and watch it later or post it posted on Pornhub. Thank you, Thank you.
[35:59] Ally: Um, Ray. Ah. Exactly right, right? These are great suggestions. Eric I will keep these in mind.
[36:15] Mike: You can actually make money doing that posting nude videos of yourself doing sexual activities men actually cannot make money doing that.
[36:21] Ally: Well, you could if you catered to a homosexual audience I Assume um.
[36:28] Mike: It's still like an order of magnitude less money just doesn't doesn't work as well. Yeah, um, okay, so so you're interested in trying different positions. Let me just just to clarify here. You've literally never masturbated in any position other than you lying on a bed maybe with your head on a pillow and your legs sort of bent at the knee. Maybe your feet touching each other kind of draped apart is that always the position.
[36:51] Ally: No no I've I've all I've only masturbated while reclining around my back but not always on a bed. Not always with a pillow. Not always with my legs in the same spot. But always what is it like supine.
[37:08] Mike: Okay, but do you always masturbate in the same location in your abode. Okay, you have a couple different locations but you would never like change that up significantly. Do you ever masturbate while driving.
[37:12] Ally: No no.
[37:22] Ally: Um, no I Why not I'm I'm usually not aroused while driving I it's It's not a great angle like sitting up.
[37:25] Mike: Why not.
[37:41] Mike: This this reminds me of like the 40 year old virgin where like he's going to masturbate like they make it as if he's a man who's never masturbated before and he like sets up a bunch of candles and like incense and all this stuff and like that's what I'm getting in my head is like you need all this sort of paraphernalia around you to make it fun.
[37:41] Ally: It's not a good angle usually um.
[37:55] Ally: No no I mean I have been fingered while I was the passenger in a car and that was enjoyable and successful. But yeah I guess it it just usually doesn't occur to me to masturbate while driving. Yes.
[38:04] Mike: You were the passenger and you were fingered by the driver. Got it got it. Okay, be.
[38:12] Ally: So that was ok because I could lean back a little bit and kind of spread my legs and such but.
[38:15] Mike: Okay I was sort of thinking it'd be more interesting if you were the driver although I mean interesting in a sort of risky and dangerous way. But you probably wouldn't like that.
[38:22] Ally: Ah, so I think that that to a certain extent has happened as well. Not to completion but like you know, twenty seconds or something like.
[38:29] Mike: You do know that there's a I mean every male listener of course here knows that there's like a genre of porn that is like women giving roadhead to men right? Yeah how you have.
[38:39] Ally: Oh that makes sense. Yeah I've done that I actually have also had cases where I offered that and the guy was like now that's ok.
[38:46] Mike: Wow He's like you're not, You're not pretty enough.
[38:50] Ally: No no I mean this is someone that I was in a long relationship with and I think he was just like you know? Ah I'm concentrating I'll try.
[38:57] Mike: I Mean there's well, there's another thing when you're sitting like that. It's a little tricky like your nuts can get mashed like it's not. It's not the world's great and also like you got to get it out of your pants and also like look I was going to mention by the way that ah I used to have like a.
[39:02] Ally: Um, okay.
[39:12] Mike: Long long ago I had a pickup truck that was it had fairly big tires and I have had the experience The sad sad experience of driving past a man who was vigorously masturbating while driving and I was like that's not that's not my favorite thing I ever saw.
[39:20] Ally: Um, oh huh. So then like does he just come on his steering wheel or like.
[39:29] Mike: You know if you if you're doing that like I you know maybe he just nuts all over his hand and eats it who knows it's not going to go on the steering wheel. Anyway, right? It's going to usually if it's if your penis is pointed up and you do not have a partner with you.
[39:33] Ally: Ah, ah, okay.
[39:40] Ally: Um, oh ah, okay.
[39:45] Mike: It doesn't just like shooting out like crazy like it's just not exciting enough like the amount the the force of the ejaculation definitely relates to how excited you are and you're much more see. This is the thing So you're like yeah your experience of nut velocity. Ah.
[39:54] Ally: Oh that's interesting. Um.
[40:02] Mike: Is is probably kind of unrealistic and you can watch videos porns of guys just masturbating and you'll see that it's much the muzzle velocity is much reduced and sort of the shame. Um, okay.
[40:15] Ally: But yeah I appreciate this redditor's advice I will take it under consideration.
[40:21] Mike: All right? Why don't we jump to another 1 here. Plenty of time. Ah so this person says I noticed after he took my panties off. He looked at my vulva for a while before going down on me. Do guys admire them before giving head.
[40:38] Ally: Um.
[40:39] Mike: She says we we had a long foreplay and when he eventually took my panties off I noticed that he looked at my vulva I wasn't sure if he admired it or just looked then he proceeded to lay down. Grab my legs with his arms and started to give head. He gave head for a long time I appreciate that she said give gave head as it. It ate me out I prefer that give head to eat me out. It's just not my favorite.
[40:52] Ally: Um, ah.
[40:58] Mike: Ah, so I assume he was just admiring me down there. Do guys usually do that with new partners. So what do you find? do guys usually do that with new partners.
[41:04] Ally: Well again I mean I usually try not to even be in this position because I don't enjoy it. Um I guess it defends what he means or what she means by he looked for a while I mean did he look for ten seconds or did he look for a couple minutes I mean. Ah.
[41:22] Mike: Let's assume that it's let's assume that it's 30 seconds would that be out of the ordinary. Okay and that would that would sort of weird you out.
[41:26] Ally: That's a long time. Yeah, that that seems like a very long time. Um, yeah I Guess I would think either. It's been a long time and he has not seen a volva in person for a while but he's. Reacquainting himself or Interested. Um or I guess I would assume that it is very different from what he's encountered before not necessarily in a bad way. But maybe he's figuring out. Ah.
[41:52] Mike: Yikes! What is the longest. What is the longest that you think you've and and also like I have to say that I've seen questions before where a man not only looked but smelled it. So does that make change your commentary at all.
[42:01] Ally: Um, ok I mean smelling it I would say that's more of like an appreciating kind of thing that like he is trying to treat it like you know a fine glass of pork or something where he wants to get each sensational experience subsequently. But um.
[42:17] Mike: Have you experienced that any any of I mean is this does this sound familiar to you or you just like look and guys don't usually look at me. They just ah, they're they're busy like pulling their underwear off so they can penetrate or something I don't know.
[42:28] Ally: I don't yeah I don't get a lot of just looking I could see if he's looking at it and also maybe like fingering you while he's looking at it to see kind of like how you respond to that and then going in with his tongue or something but I think if he takes your panties off and he's not touching you and he's just looking I think that would be the. Strange after 5 or ten seconds no and I'm trying to think you know upon encountering a new penis or I guess a repeat penis like do I look at it for a long time. You know, no, it's.
[42:48] Mike: All right? but you've never encountered this.
[43:03] Mike: Why not? Why does that make you laugh because it because it's just so gross. You're like ah.
[43:06] Ally: I No no because I'm usually doing other things to it. You know I'm I'm I'm touching it or I'm like you know, starting to lick it or something I feel like if I took a guy's stick out and then just not touching it just stared at it for a while I feel like that would also make him uncomfortable I would assume.
[43:23] Mike: Do you smell it I mean are you worried about it being kind of not clean. That's not okay, you you and probably you would notice quickly if if that was an issue right.
[43:26] Ally: No no. Um, yeah, um, and that hasn't been an issue I mean if a guy has not shaved his pubic hair at all, you can smell in that kind of like you know mustiness that accumulates from just hair traps odors or something but it's it's never been.
[43:50] Mike: That's not good. You haven't because that's like a pretty pretty normal thing to encounter. Um, okay so you're you're just so thirsty for it that you would immediately get your mouth involved.
[43:50] Ally: Problem I guess I never encountered like a dirty penis I don't think so know.
[44:06] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
[44:09] Mike: That makes sense I mean I don't I think this behavior is somewhat normal but I don't think that it's ah I'm not sure it's admiring I think is the wrong word I think it's basically that like men are conditioned to look like. Women don't get naked in front of men as easily as men would like them to and so I think that it's probably more like he's like whoa like this is like whoa that like like yeah, it's like um yeah, if I.
[44:34] Ally: Um.
[44:48] Mike: I could imagine a woman having the same reaction to a man but I don't think that happens for a few reasons including maybe just like that men are less careful about hiding their bodies. It could just be something like that. It could just be like the general fact like it's if if if you went to a man in a bar and said hey I want. To look at your cock a lot more than half the men would just as long as you're a reasonably attractive woman more than half the men would say ah okay like you know how? how do we arrange this like do you want to do it now and so forth there. There's data behind this. It is true. It is true. There. So. There's a um I think I mentioned this.
[45:13] Ally: Um I don't I don't think that's true.
[45:26] Mike: Maybe last week with keith there's yeah, there's a there's a a study where on college campuses men and women attractive men and women proposition the opposite gender for for research to see what they would do and women who were proposition zero percent of the time were willing to sort of go back to the apartment and have sex men were willing to do it. Something like seventy five percent of the time and that that Jibes of my expectation like if yeah, the man might wonder what the trap is what's the gimmick like because this is so unusual but like they they would be down to do that if the woman is not is is reasonably attractive and so for the like okay like I'm willing to to have sex with you.
[45:47] Ally: But interesting.
[45:54] Ally: Right? Yeah yeah.
[46:05] Mike: And yeah, like if you want to inspect and flate my penis like that's cool. Um, so I think so I think actually it's like I think that I think the reason the guy's looking at her is simply like he's like I did it. It's like it's like the olympian looking at their medal.
[46:17] Ally: Sure, Yeah, yeah, okay yeah.
[46:23] Mike: You know on the metal stand. It's like it's like of course it's just the metal but it's like yeah like look what I did.
[46:26] Ally: Right? It's like in case, he never makes it there again. He wants to save the memory.
[46:30] Mike: Well, it's just that it's It's easy. The thing that you can't minimize here is that like for a guy. Ah, ah below say the ninety fifth percentile attractiveness like this is actually sort of an accomplishment like he had to do a bunch of fancy footwork to get to this stage of the situation and really is like.
[46:42] Ally: Yes.
[46:49] Mike: Ah, marker of getting to that stage and so why I think that's what the guy's doing. He's like yes here I am I want to take a mental picture of this even though like yeah I mean I mean have you ah squatted over a mirror and looked at yourself. No, it's not great.
[46:54] Ally: Um.
[47:01] Ally: Um, yeah, not recently. But yeah right I mean it's not as interesting to me as I assume maybe it is to a man.
[47:07] Mike: Right. I mean I think that objectively if you look at it. It's not great like and men can know this if they simply um, well let's just say that after men orgasm when they're masturbating they usually close their the windows on their computer really quickly.
[47:24] Ally: Um.
[47:27] Mike: Just doesn't matter anymore. You're not you you cease to be interested because of the post-nut clarity and so yeah, and so at that moment if you were objectively rating the beauty of these body parts. You'd be like yeah I like her her face is much prettier which is the truth. Yeah, this normal right? Yeah I mean men and women are it's gonna.
[47:29] Ally: Um, right.
[47:37] Ally: Um, yeah, okay, that's that's good. Yeah.
[47:46] Mike: Gonna jibe more all right? Let's let's move on to this this next question is actually on not on Reddit it's on revveit which is when somebody's delete a lot of people delete their sex questions I wish people would stop doing that because it wastes my time. Okay.
[47:58] Ally: Oh yeah.
[48:04] Mike: Ah, the question is why and you you actually noted this 1 ah when we were talking before the show. So maybe you had some stuff to say about it. Why does my husband keep telling me that I can't take his big cock particularly before we have sex. He's very competitive but telling me that I can't take it does not challenge me in a good way. It makes me turned off. Maybe if I understand it. It won't bother me so much. Also, it's worth noting that our sex life has always been very active and good and I can take his big penis and many bigger. Although I I don't tell him that what do you think What do you think is going on here. Thanks.
[48:32] Ally: I like the way that you're reading this ghost I well I agree with the first commenter says but it sounds a lot sexier than you can't handle my medium sized cock.
[48:45] Mike: Um, have you ever had 1 that you couldn't handle.
[48:49] Ally: There was 1 that was so large that it would kind of slip out as he was thrusting back I think because you know I was like so my vagina was like squeezing. No I think it's like like he was stretching me enough that like as he was slipping back. There was also.
[48:57] Mike: Trusting back wouldn't that because it's small.
[49:08] Mike: Um, this sounds hot ah did was that did you like that was that sort of hot for me I think I got to be honest I Got to be honest I think either he was not that long or not that hard because if you think about it like even if if if if it's if he's okay if I took a rigid.
[49:07] Ally: You know the vagina was like pushing it out as well. No I didn't because it interrupts the flow like you want it to stay in. Yeah. Boom.
[49:27] Mike: Piece of Pvc Pipe Not the sexiest thing in the world but I'm just thinking a rigid and it's let's say it's whatever the diameter is to make it big I don't think that would slip out right? It's rigid so a I don't care what your muscles do I think it's going to be hard for you to to make it slip out.
[49:27] Ally: Um, yeah.
[49:35] Ally: Um, yeah.
[49:43] Ally: Well, but like as you're pulling it out if the thing you're pulling it out of is also contracting I think there's a natural 10
[49:47] Mike: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but it's attached to his Body. You're not going to like Ram it through his body I mean like it's it has a it's controlled on the other end.
[49:57] Ally: Yeah, maybe he was trying to pull out too far I don't know.
[50:02] Mike: Okay, okay, so you're not exactly sure why he was slipping out you your assumption was you were somehow pushing him out but what what were the other I mean did it did it hurt was there like a could you not take it I mean did you have to ask him to stop That's pretty hot too like like in a male fantasy world like a woman being like oh.
[50:05] Ally: Right? yeah.
[50:20] Mike: Is just too big for me sounds great even though it kind of ends the Encounter.
[50:21] Ally: I Really I mean it it. Yeah it I didn't have to ask him to stop it. It Also it wasn't sort of the most comfortable. Um, you know I think it it was.
[50:37] Mike: Um, did he like it did he like that he was challenging. You.
[50:37] Ally: Suboptimal to have it be that large. Well I guess it's hard to say we didn't talk about it. Yeah, but yeah, um.
[50:45] Mike: It was a 1 off like it was very late. Okay, that's fine, but like do okay but so do do you have any thoughts on why a guy would like have some sort of fantasy life around like you can't take it or you can't handle it.
[50:56] Ally: Ah.
[51:02] Ally: Well I Think what you were saying makes a lot of sense that he wants to you know that he thinks it's kind of sexy to talk about how big his dick is um and comparatively. You know how big it is for her I think a lot of it. And this question depends on you know in what way is he saying this like when she says he's very competitive and it doesn't challenge her normally I would think that a guy is not saying this to challenge you. He's not like I bet you can't like I'll I'll pay you twenty dollars if you can I mean I think it's more along the lines of dirty talk. But if it's not then that's a more interesting question I Guess then I don't have an answer for her if it's not.
[51:41] Mike: Um I don't it. It is dirty talk. But I think that like the important aspect from my perspective here is that he wants to sort of possess or own her. He wants to like men like the idea that they're sort of like cracking you in half that they're like.
[51:55] Ally: O m.
[51:59] Mike: They're doing something to you like that's profound and so ah, yeah, and women sort of play into that fantasy even though like sadly spoke having spoken with many women the ones who were willing to talk to me and reading online I realized like that actually this stuff doesn't is not that profound. And so it's like you that fantasy Falls away. But yeah, so it's like you can't handle it. It's like oh there's like implied in there is like I'm doing something fundamental to you I'm I'm owning you with my cock right.
[52:26] Ally: Right? right? yeah.
[52:31] Mike: That's not how sex is for you at all right? You don't think to yourself This guy's owning me with his cock. Do you that'd be hot if you did. But I think you don't this. Yeah.
[52:36] Ally: Umm.
[52:41] Ally: Ah, maybe maybe like I don't know if I would say owning. Um, it's you know, certainly I think that he's sometimes I think of it in terms of domination and sometimes I think of it in terms of like you know he's. Giving me something that I want and can't you know make happen for myself that he's providing this experience that wouldn't be the same him though I mean it's not the same like warmth. It's not the same motion and.
[52:59] Mike: You You could we discussed the tile and the the dildo with the suction cup. It would it would. It's the same you can heat it up in the microwave same emotion see this is the thing you want there to be an emotional time. Oh motion.
[53:13] Ally: Oh no, no the same motion like you know the the thing thrusting against me like any emotion comes from me. Not it.
[53:18] Mike: Um, there are these devices that you can get that's like ah it's like you get some kind of a motor maybe from a weedy or a lawnmower and you attach it to a Rod with a dildo at the end and and cam girls do this, You could actually see it on Chatterbait and like they they have a knob and they turn it up and it just thrusts in and out.
[53:27] Ally: Um, ah god.
[53:36] Ally: But.
[53:38] Mike: Right? I'm not sure the motion is exactly right though you see you probably want a body pressed against your body right on see that's where I don't like I don't want someone else's body pressed against mine I think this is why I bring up glory holes all the time. Yeah I want there to be distance if there was a way to to.
[53:41] Ally: Yeah, and something that's not repetitive and it's not the same motion all the time you know I think there's some element of. Um, yeah, yeah, right? Yeah well so you don't find that the sort of synthetic vaginas are equivalent for you.
[53:58] Mike: Tell a duda donically have sex I think that would be ideal.
[54:07] Mike: Um, I think that I think that like the the robot future that my children will experience might actually work well for me. Ah the synthetic stuff like the Tennga eggs. First of all is like a little bit gross I don't.
[54:16] Ally: Um, okay.
[54:24] Mike: And don't like things that simulate biological stuff like that like it. It just winds up kind of being a mess like cleaning. It's a mess although the Tenga eggs to be fair I think you throw away their're single use. But then that feels wasteful.
[54:26] Ally: Ah, okay. Yeah, but like a flashlight that you warmed in the microwave would not for you adequately simulate a vagina. Okay.
[54:39] Mike: I I'm not sure I haven't done that um like the idea of microwaving it like here at the office so like hey yeah, hey Bob what? what? What are you microwaving? Yeah yeah, it's not that's not great. Ah, but yeah I like the.
[54:50] Ally: But smells like fish. Yeah.
[54:59] Mike: I Think yes, there's something that I'm looking for and I think the thing I want is a robot. Yeah, that's what I'll say about that. Um.
[55:03] Ally: Ok, ok with its Robot body or you just want like a robotic like pelvis. Oh interesting. Ok so you don't mind a body pressed against you as long. It's not a human body if it's a machine body. You're okay, ok.
[55:10] Mike: I see I Want a robotic body. Yeah I think yeah yeah I don't know but I Also don't find prostitution compelling because of the fact that I know the person is so. Put out by doing it or so like repelled by it of course my basic ah my basic programming is to assume that women are repelled by men's bodies generally so that ah it's That's what you say? That's what they say they say that men can be attractive but it's.
[55:29] Ally: Um, yeah, yeah.
[55:38] Ally: Right? Not always the case. But.
[55:47] Mike: So not the ordinary everyday experience as you walk down the road and women stare straight ahead and never look at you all right was everything. It's just not you know and then if I talk to them. It's immediately disastrous. All right, Let's get to another question here. So so.
[55:51] Ally: Um, that's more your facial expression. Yeah yeah.
[56:05] Mike: This 1 this person asks why? why does he do this after sex sort of similar. It's similar. It's like the it's the it's the second half of the man who's looking lovingly at the volva before initiating a weird or stupid question but I was wondering why my partner spreads my butt cheeks apart and looks at my vag asshole.
[56:07] Ally: Yeah, but.
[56:15] Ally: And.
[56:24] Mike: Notice that he can see both after having sex and doggy position when I'm laying on my stomach kind of complicated so she's it's a prone bone and then he does some sort of a spread maneuver afterward. Okay I just don't get if he's looking to see if he's finished inside me or he just wants to look at my asshole lmao ah, ah, this has happened a few.
[56:24] Ally: And.
[56:30] Ally: Okay, yeah.
[56:39] Ally: With four O's yeah, this is.
[56:43] Mike: Yeah I know this woman not not the sharpest tool in the shed this has happened a few times now and I I don't get it ha ha I'm weirded out to ask him so I'm a ask reddit I'm ah I am a is anybody okay, so so the point is like is this weird like what's going on have you had a man do this.
[56:54] Ally: Ah, who. No I Yeah I Guess probably he's looking to see you know if it's pulsating maybe or if it has changed Shape. So.
[57:02] Mike: Ran.
[57:10] Mike: This is great because it's like I like the fact that you can give the female answer and then I can tell you what it actually is so any other thoughts It's like it's like a foreign language lesson. It's like no go ahead and give some guesses.
[57:17] Ally: Yeah, ah well you just said you said that he doesn't want to see it after he has come because of Postnet clarity. So I feel like that complicates the answer here because if he does want to see it does that maybe imply that he didn't come.
[57:27] Mike: Um, it's true. Good point I like your reasoning there. That's excellent, um does it make it so he doesn't want to see it Well any other thoughts before I wait in here.
[57:40] Ally: I I mean maybe he can see his come in there or like dripping out I don't know.
[57:47] Mike: Yeah, so he definitely doesn't want to interact with it like. So for example, I've had this experience of like and maybe maybe actually maybe you've and I'll I'll use the term made a guy do this before like so men generally prefer you to have your orgasm if you're going to have 1 before they have theirs.
[58:05] Ally: And.
[58:07] Mike: Right would is that good jibe with you is that something you've experienced.
[58:10] Ally: I guess yeah I mean I would say I usually come second because I think it takes more time for me to come than for a guy to come or more effort or something. Yeah.
[58:17] Mike: Oh my lord. Well let's let's delve into this so what? What is the so if if he if he comes first then his penis is out of the equation. So how do you then get off.
[58:25] Ally: Either He fingers me or like I masturbate while he you know Kisses me or touches me in some way or yeah.
[58:33] Mike: Okay, okay, so let me let me let you in on something here I'm going to help you I'm going to improve your sex life men hate that. Okay, there's 2 reasons number 1 you're basically making him have sexual contact during his post neck clarity. Yes I know there are men that like.
[58:37] Ally: Um, yes, okay.
[58:51] Mike: Have very shorterractory periods and stuff. But but in most cases so you know so it's obviously individual and so if you happen to be with a guy where that's just totally cool then that's fine. But for most men that's going to be a drag because he's like look I just want to watch Tv I Want to read a book I want to go to bed like leave me alone.
[58:58] Ally: Um, boom.
[59:06] Ally: Ah, yeah, yeah.
[59:07] Mike: Um, I know there's guys you like to just like chat. Maybe they just want to chat That's cool too. But they don't want to have sex anymore. They want you to put your clothes on and stop. It. Okay, that's number 1 number 2 you're making him finger you while his semen is in your vagina Girl. Just not want to do that right? In fact I was actually going to give this example of a thing that I don't like it's like such a drag so is this what happens like is this are we talking No Condom and so there's actually he's having to like oh lord. Yeah, so he doesn't want to be it.
[59:25] Ally: Ah, ok, ok.
[59:34] Ally: Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah, what about though I mean what if he comes and there's you know there's some cuddling or maybe even light napping after he comes and then you know maybe.
[59:44] Mike: Yeah, you don't want to do that.
[59:52] Ally: Five minutes have gone by maybe ten minutes have gone by and then you know I start touching myself and sometimes that can lead to then us having sex for a second time where kind of I come in the middle. Okay.
[01:00:04] Mike: Yeah, that can be hot I wanted to say that every minute that passes makes it better. That's the important thing. So yeah I mean every minute that passes makes it better. Keep in mind though that throughout most men will have to like kind of be very careful because they don't want to be giving you oral or like get they don't.
[01:00:10] Ally: Ah, okay, okay.
[01:00:23] Mike: You know as you know from the men on this show like they're they're not excited about tasting or ingesting their own semen and so there's this I don't why don't you just come before. Why does the guy have to come first.
[01:00:26] Ally: Yeah, yeah.
[01:00:37] Mike: Like why don't you just reestablish the normal order of events here like it's exciting for the guy to see you come is it because is it because after you come, you're not interested anymore.
[01:00:37] Ally: Um.
[01:00:45] Ally: No I am um I guess I guess 2 things like 1 is that I'm worried that let's say it takes ten minutes of you know, fingering or something for me to come. Yeah, what if he then you know loses interest and then doesn't want.
[01:00:55] Mike: For you to come? okay.
[01:01:03] Ally: To have sex after that.
[01:01:04] Mike: Have you had that happen before have you never given that a shot.
[01:01:11] Ally: I'm trying to think back. Um.
[01:01:15] Mike: Like as a guy like at you. Okay, all right right? What about like it's you need to concentrate on yourself like so in other words like you if he's penetrating you. It's actually tricky for you to concentrate on yourself. You don't actually want to do it then you want him to withdraw and.
[01:01:17] Ally: I'm not sure. Yeah, maybe maybe it hasn't happened but ah.
[01:01:33] Mike: Finger you.
[01:01:33] Ally: Yeah I think like if I'm yeah if he's penetrating me. There's usually not enough room for me to also have my hand down there. Um.
[01:01:41] Mike: All right wait that that that's logical sure you could be in the you could flip your body over but sure.
[01:01:47] Ally: Yeah, yeah, well that gets back to you know the advice of that I should practice like masturbating in in that position I know yeah this is such a useful experience. Ah.
[01:01:54] Mike: Look We're making your life veteran in untold ways here I Just think like I think if I think you should check in with your current bow and ask like whether this whether this sequencing is a drag for him. Try to get him to tell the truth. He'll probably not want to but like that's it.
[01:02:07] Ally: Yeah I mean maybe he will listen to this and then be able to just text me yes or no or something. Ah right? Yeah, okay.
[01:02:12] Mike: There you go is if he's a listener. Yeah, you could send him the episode and be like what here' some here's some thoughts. But yeah like I think I think that sequencing is a drag. Let me let's get back to this topic here. The thing he's doing is he's like whoa look what I did. That's what it is.
[01:02:24] Ally: M. Um, is gazing upon his efforts. Yeah.
[01:02:31] Mike: Like oh I destroyed I destroyed that like it's like this. It's like the transformation of this sort of ah hitherto beautiful object into something that's not beautiful anymore and he's reflecting on that of course we don't have Keith here to like give a different mail and I should put that in quotes viewpoint but that's.
[01:02:41] Ally: Um.
[01:02:51] Mike: That's the right answer the correct answer is he's just looking at what he's wrought what his penis wrought.
[01:02:54] Ally: Yeah, but I mean in the order of I came I saw I conquered or as pitbull says I saw I conquered I came no 1 ever puts I saw at the end which it seems like this person does.
[01:03:08] Mike: Well I mean people but people do I mean people you know, ah the what is it the ah when they when what is it when God Destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah if you look back you turn into a column of alt or something and they did look back. They had to or in the ah.
[01:03:20] Ally: Yeah, yeah, yeah, you rid a she and or is yeah okay, okay.
[01:03:27] Mike: Very hot there we go I mean there's yeah I mean so looking looking at the destruction 1 is rod is actually kind of has ah has a philosophical backing too and I mean I think it makes sense to me that look. That's what he's doing. He's like oh I want to want to see the tragedy that's unfolded here. Let's see the result of my handy work and then.
[01:03:40] Ally: And.
[01:03:44] Mike: Then he'll slap it closed again because he doesn't want to dwell on it. But it's not yeah, it's anything that happens after he nuts is going to be fairly non-sexual for him which is why you need to try to reorder your activities and make your make it more fun for your guy. Yeah, that's I'm amazed that you haven't had a guy complain about that.
[01:03:45] Ally: Okay, yeah.
[01:04:02] Mike: My goodness because it's just it's such a drag. It's like really so I got a does he wear a glove like is he like got a sort of scoop. He's got to do you Let me ask this before he gets his fingers sweat. Do you go to the bathroom and kind of get most.
[01:04:08] Ally: Ah see I cloth No m.
[01:04:18] Ally: No no I I will ask him whether this bothers him or not but he hasn't indicated that it does but he's also very polite. So.
[01:04:21] Mike: Oh my Lord. So the do you You never do. So this means that like he's yeah, he's probably too Polite. So this means that he when he's in there. He's actually pulling strands of the sticky iki iki back out is that what's going on. That's just as eve.
[01:04:40] Ally: Um, potentially I can't see I Guess no no.
[01:04:47] Mike: Does he put it in your mouth. It does that hot for you. He never does that at least I could see that would be a little dominant. He should do that but you probably wouldn't like that though, maybe maybe you wouldn't care I don't know you just feel like why? Why are you doing this will he be doing it because it's a he's he's dominating you. It's like he's supposed to be like exciting. He.
[01:04:57] Ally: Right? Yeah I think of just more being. Why are you doing that? Yeah I'm confused but.
[01:05:07] Mike: You know, be like if he well it's just sort of like an oral kind of thing all right. We don't have very much time left I want to I want to get to this 1 other just to get your take on it. This is a long post that a man posted I got to find it here and um I'm interested in the woman's take on this.
[01:05:08] Ally: And.
[01:05:14] Ally: Okay.
[01:05:26] Mike: I'm going to try to sort of ah by the way, all these redup posts will be in the show notes as usual so people can look and read them for themselves and even comment. Ah this is a guy I'm going to try to sort of summarize it. This is a guy who is fifty 2 years old and decided to. He decided to go gay. He got divorced and he's like I'm just gonna I'm just gonna have sex with some men now all right? So he's like the sex has been okay, he was fun at the beginning seeing penises up close learning what guys taste like what I do and don't like I don't like having sex with men. So so this sounds pretty rough. He realized he's a bottom with guys. So I guess that means he gives blows and takes anal sex. Um all right? You know he has come to understand from this all lot of the crap that women put up with bad hygiene lack of four play biggies, etc. Bad hygiene something. You thankfully have not experienced. That's good or not terrible hygiene anyway.
[01:06:17] Ally: Who.
[01:06:23] Mike: Um, the biggest change by far though was suddenly equating the sense of fear or intimidation with sex I was aware that it was an issue for women. Never really internalize it until now I'm in decent shape and tall but all these guys surprise me with how strong they are. Ah, the guys with big muscles or bodybuilders I feel almost fragile I'm almost weightless they can sort of throw me around never play contact sports I'm just you know it's just a guy but you know, reasonably good shaped guy and so he goes on and on about how these guys like can sort of you know. Control him. He talks about how like they can push his head down. They can force him to lick their butthole if he's licking their balls stuff like that I'm curious. The female take on this like is this is this something that you're like deeply aware of all the time like is it true that you feel like men are like in this situation men you become. Because you know you know I assume you don't spend a lot of time arm wrestling or physically wrestling with men. You don't play football with other men or rugby or something like so I could see a woman like not typically having an understanding of the strength delta and like if I go to the gym like you know you'll see men men bench pressing 2 hundred pounds and you might see women bench pressing.
[01:07:15] Ally: Correct. Yeah.
[01:07:28] Mike: There are women of course bodybuilders who get up to those levels but you know the more normal might be a woman only bench pressing like 70 pounds or fifty pounds or something and so there are these vast strength differences and I'm curious if like that if that's something you are deeply aware of that maybe men wouldn't realize.
[01:07:33] Ally: Yes.
[01:07:40] Ally: No I'm not and I think that the way that this guy is going into it and describing different scenarios of kind of him being dominated. You know I feel like maybe this is something that does turn him on and that he's just conflicted By. So I think it. You know is more salient to him than it would be I mean luckily I guess I could say like I've never been afraid during sex I've never felt like a guy was you know like this guy he says sex with men is scary or intimidating I've never felt a guy to be scary or intimidating. During sex I understand that they're stronger than me but you know I've never even felt like I had to fight back or anything I Guess I've always been with people where I thought if I wasn't enjoying something I would just say that and they would stop and.
[01:08:24] Mike: Do you ever notice that like he could sort of just throw you around or move your body in a certain way that and you're like surprised by like how easy it is for him.
[01:08:34] Ally: I I mean I I like it if a guy kind of takes that more active role and is like you know, kind of moving around to repositioning me or doing kind of dominant things like you know, holding me down or putting his hand on my throat or something.
[01:08:47] Mike: Do you tend to date sort of. Do you tend to date sort of weaklings is that part of what's going on there.
[01:08:54] Ally: Know ah me know I Definitely usually date guys who are stronger than me. But I guess it doesn't it doesn't.
[01:09:04] Mike: You're all like.
[01:09:08] Mike: Well stronger than you as a woman should be table stakes I mean men should be I mean that's ah the unusual unless you I don't think you're a bodybuilder or you know like that right? And okay, so.
[01:09:13] Ally: And no, no um I Did you know once date a guy who is much smaller than me like he was great and we dated for a long time like both like height and wave and and just a small guy. Yeah, there's a little guy.
[01:09:24] Mike: Smaller in height or weight or both interesting. So like kind of a little guy. Yeah, that's that was great. Okay.
[01:09:33] Ally: Ah, yeah, ah, but no I Guess it's not yeah I'm I'm not surprised by how easy it is for them I guess I guess I've never dated a guy who is that ah much bigger stronger than me.
[01:09:41] Mike: Okay.
[01:09:47] Mike: Got it. So it's yeah, it's not this okay that that makes sense and maybe when maybe when a guy sort of enters the Belatedly or a latter day entry into the gay community like this maybe I mean certainly there's culturally, there's this notion of like kind of bodybuilder and really strong gay men. Maybe that's like a.
[01:10:04] Ally: Yeah I'm I'm curious like this guy doesn't say anything about his like height or weight or anything right? How? Um, okay.
[01:10:06] Mike: Ah, thing that he's encountering.
[01:10:11] Mike: Um, he says he's like in shape and you know normally tall and stuff. But I mean like look like like even if you're like a normal strength guy like a guy who's actually a bodybuilder is going to be like 3 times stronger than you and so like I can sort of understand what he's talking about I've never like had I've never been in this situation but I was thinking maybe women.
[01:10:24] Ally: Yeah I Guess yeah.
[01:10:29] Mike: Like more commonly get in this situation where you're like wow like he could just break me in half or maybe that's arousing.
[01:10:32] Ally: Maybe very I but this same I would I would assume that only happens to very small women like Hundred pound women or something like I'm like 1 hundred and fifty 1 hundred and 55 pounds I don't think anybody is you know, tossing me around like it's nothing right? but.
[01:10:45] Mike: Oh I think if a guy was like a big bodybuilder guy. He might be but I mean imagine like ah I don't know if you've seen up close like ah the size of like an Nfl player like these's are really really big people um haven't done that. Yeah, all right.
[01:10:50] Ally: Amy.
[01:10:55] Ally: Okay, yeah, I've never slipped with an Nfl player. Okay, yeah.
[01:11:02] Mike: I did ah in college there was a girl in my hall who dated 1 of the linemen from the football team and she didn't have very good like impulse control and so she would his name was well I know his name I don't know anything other other than his first name was pate.
[01:11:18] Ally: I Don't think you should say Ok yeah, ah okay, wow.
[01:11:21] Mike: Was paid and I know that because you would hear her yelling fuck me Pat and you would hear him sort of slamming the wall and she was pretty attractive to so that pretty much bummed out all the other guys and not not bumed that like it's like it's like it was annoying but at the same time we're all like well I want to be I Want to be paid. You know so it was just.
[01:11:32] Ally: Ah. Hey was it Peyton manning. Ok ok, I'm trying to read through the comments to see if other people are saying that this happens to them.
[01:11:41] Mike: Pretty brutal. No no, no wasn't not Peyton manning. No I did not go to tennessee I don't have the accent for it.
[01:11:56] Ally: Yeah I don't know I I think this is more of a this guy thing than a common experience I think he's focusing on this because he likes it.
[01:12:01] Mike: Yeah, or he like yeah he might be in the sort of leather and you know big muscles part of the I'm not sure the right term for it. But.
[01:12:07] Ally: Yeah, so ok so he's putting their foot on my face while fucking me so that has never happened to me that seems very niche has anyone ever have you ever put your foot on someone's face off right? right? yeah.
[01:12:22] Mike: Only only metaphorically now. Yeah so I I'll sometimes I'll be I'll do I'll be having sex with someone and I'll say it and I'll say what's look tell me Avogadro's number what is it and if they can't come up with it I just slap them. Yeah.
[01:12:27] Ally: Like Sylvia plath says just boots stuff.
[01:12:33] Ally: Right? right? Yeah, very good and.
[01:12:41] Mike: Keep it bitch. Yeah, all right I think we should probably end it there. Um, that all that'll do it for episode forty 3 of your mileage may very thank you alie for coming on and we hope that. Ah keith we wish him safe travels back from. Ah. Guatemala he'll be marching up with the new migrant caravan and please rate ah rate and review us on your podcast app and we'll catch you next time.

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Episode 43: Arousing Adventures With Ally: Rating Sex, Orgasm Advice, Masturbation Technique, Odd Behaviors

Episode Transcript