Your Mileage May Vary: Pegging Interrupted, Sugar Daddies, Masturbation Hacks, Hall Passes

Episode Transcript

Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.

[00:01] Keith: Hello and welcome to your mileage may vary. We talk about sex and relationships with frankness that is controversial but mostly in good faith I am Keith my co-host is Mike um, hi Mike have you listened to Kara Swisher's podcast with Scott Galloway
[00:10] Mike: Hello Hello Keith
[00:17] Keith: It's called pivot. Ok so well I like it but you might find Kara swisher grading to a point where you can't enjoy it. But she's a good interviewer anyway, they always shoot the shit about their week for the first couple minutes or so so I think we should do the same.
[00:17] Mike: No, should I.
[00:34] Keith: Will ingratiate our listeners to us. Ah, okay, well I've been back in the country for about two weeks now and I've been running a lot I ran forty miles last week. But I think I maybe got injured today.
[00:36] Mike: Okay, why don't you start.
[00:51] Mike: Go on.
[00:54] Keith: Ah, at the ninth and final mile of my run today I felt a tweak in my right aductor and that it's a set of muscles and attendant in your thigh and that's what I injured before.
[01:03] Mike: What's that What's an addict or.
[01:13] Keith: And so yeah, it's not great. Ah, and I'm supposed to run eighteen miles the day after tomorrow right? right? right? Yeah well I'm signed up for a race in December and if I don't keep doing the progression and the training.
[01:15] Mike: That's a bad sign. Yeah.
[01:22] Mike: Just to make sure you're fully injured. Yeah so.
[01:33] Keith: And won't be ready for the race. So if I rest I can't race. But if I don't rest I can't race. So how's your week then.
[01:34] Mike: Right? nice. I Yeah, it's tricky a pretty good. Um I'm trying to think if there's anything eventful to bring up I'm not sure there is yeah I've got a cold but it's not covered I had to test myself for Covid because um.
[01:48] Keith: Yes, anything interesting happened.
[01:58] Mike: I was taking a family member to the hospital for a surgery yesterday. So I did that older family member and ah all went well I learned that only 2 people can go into the hospital once because of covid so I got this? yes so I got to sit outside.
[02:03] Keith: Um, is this an older family member or younger family member.
[02:12] Keith: Still.
[02:17] Mike: And actually it's a really dumb rule that they have because ah it So um, it was my father and it actually makes very little sense because ah. That meant my mom went in with him and of course neither of them can remember what the instructions were from the doctor. Yeah, So yeah.
[02:36] Keith: Yeah, yeah, yeah, my dad had some heart stuff. Um last year or couple years ago actually maybe is Preco I don't remember he had some art stuff and his girlfriend went with him to the hospital and my sister. And brother in law are both doctors of internal medicine and so they were trying to figure out what was going on through what my dad and what his girlfriend remembered and they're both in their seventy s and it was a frustrating experience.
[03:07] Mike: Right? right? It's sort of nonsensical and and if it had occurred to me at the time I would have made some plea to the hospital staff to let me in but I just I just didn't think of it I thought okay I'll just sit outside on my computer. Um.
[03:15] Keith: Right? right? right? and the details matter on this stuff like what you should do after whatever the procedure is and you know medication considerations and all that kind of stuff. But anyway.
[03:22] Mike: Yeah, like.
[03:32] Mike: Yes, yes, would you like to hear the joke that my dad told the people as he woke up from Anesthesia All right? He asked them they it was It was like a a heria repair very minor operations. He's totally fine, but um, he asked them Well ah hey will I will I be able to play the piano.
[03:35] Keith: Yes.
[03:42] Keith: Are.
[03:48] Mike: After this and they said sure I mean I didn't finish yet. They said well you you could be the hospital staff. Ah Doc will I be able to play the piano after this. That's great because I couldn't be for there. You go. That's a good joke.
[03:51] Keith: That's the joke. Yeah oh sorry okay. Yes, sure of course.
[04:05] Keith: Wow Yeah, see sure everyone many chuckles were had all around. Um we talked a little bit last week about how a woman could find out the height of a man from online dating photos.
[04:20] Mike: Yes I do.
[04:22] Keith: Remember that conversation I was thinking about that some more there basically aren't any things that a woman can hide about her attractiveness given a set of 2 or 3 photos right? So they can try to hide maybe their weight. By only using certain angles but I'm getting pretty good at detecting that like if there isn't a full body shot in a form fitting dress or a swimsuit I'm always like I wonder what this person's.
[04:55] Mike: So absence absence of a photo is indication of obesity or at least overweightness.
[04:59] Keith: Yeah I mean you can use other clues like if they mentioned that they really like running or you know there are things in their profile that imply athlete then then maybe there's an excuse for not having a body shot but most people know to have a shot that that sort of shows it. But. For men I mean there really isn't a good way to demonstrate your height.
[05:24] Mike: Like this is because you were trying to figure out a way to demonstrate your height on a photo right? so.
[05:29] Keith: I list my height on all of my profiles because I just don't want it to be ambiguous and some women really care about that and so and and my height is such that it ah it won't filter me out. Ah but it. Could be a little bit of a negative for some people who think they're above vanity.
[05:49] Mike: Do you think? Ah, ah yeah, know that makes sense I mean you can list if you list it directly then I mean you could be lying but it's so immediately obvious that you're lying that I think it would be a mistake. Do you think? actually? yeah.
[05:57] Keith: Right? Actually, there's a big meme about you know every guy who says he's six Six feet is actually five ten but I'm actually six feet so am I getting punisher should I say I'm like 6 1 or six two I think I shouldn't.
[06:12] Mike: I don't know the answer to that I'm I'm five eleven so I I carefully don't say I'm six feet because it's false. Ah so close. yeah yeah well I yeah I guess six feet matters that much I figure that I'm close enough but whatever I don't know that's not my problem. Um.
[06:16] Keith: Yeah, but many men do.
[06:26] Keith: Yeah.
[06:30] Mike: Do you think that it would be what would happen I'm guessing the answer is negative but let's say that you took 1 of your dating profiles and added well let's say that you I was going to say penis size. But for you that might now work. Let's let's let's say that you said seven and a half inch penis do you think that would do make better.
[06:39] Keith: I Know where this is going I think yeah.
[06:48] Mike: Worse are just no difference I'm guessing worse.
[06:50] Keith: I think I think it would change the shape of this this sorts of matches that I get I think I would get more people who are just looking for a hookup. Um, you know of course some women are ah.
[07:00] Mike: That's cool.
[07:07] Keith: Not size queens and you know most people don't orgasm from P I V anyway and so size as a matter but some women are just looking to get railed and they do care about size and for them I think that you know listing you know.
[07:26] Mike: Yeah, ok have you have you met a woman have you met a woman off a dating app who was just looking to get railed and if so can you say a little bit about what that encounter was like.
[07:26] Keith: Your penis length listing a long penis length would select would positively select for them.
[07:37] Keith: I don't think I have a mal baby I have I don't know I sort of that and screen against that kind of behavior I'm rarely looking for a one night stand
[07:41] Mike: No, it's too bad.
[07:50] Mike: Okay, why.
[07:57] Keith: Ah I don't know I guess I don't really love one night stance I've probably had 5 or so and i.
[08:07] Mike: Do the if someone's seems like they're interested in that do they skew less attractive also typically me Okay, okay I mean if someone who was like a yeah.
[08:14] Keith: Probably probably I mean with with a sample size as small as mine. It's It's hard to make generalities. But I understand why you think that may be the case and yeah.
[08:26] Mike: Right? Yeah, no, it's ah well there is this I mean I just experienced. It's actually there's been an upsurge on social media this week of posts that I've seen about. Ah. Basically carrying the incel narrative about how women all of the guys who are eight nine and ten s are date. You know, basically that's all those are the only people that get right swipes from women on social media. Um.
[08:52] Keith: Yeah.
[08:57] Mike: Yeah, and it was particularly I remember a video by a guy who said he he was a self-described six and a half it's really actually hard for me to say but that's probably right and he's just basically like yeah I'd rather play video games than mess around with ah you know exactly? he's just like he wasn't ugly like he looked fine. But yeah, he's not like super attractive at all. So.
[09:08] Keith: Dating apps.
[09:13] Keith: Yeah I don't know what average looking people can do to up level themselves but hold on if you're a woman and you care about height which I think is rational to not be attracted to guys below a certain height or above a certain height just like some men prefer certain breast size or.
[09:28] Mike: Okay, just like so.
[09:33] Keith: Certain figure shapes or certain race. Ah, all of those things are are just apparent from photos but height is not apparent and a lot of men get sort of outraged you see this posted on the tinder subredd at a ton people posting conversations with women who ask them their height and they're like outraged that the women. Ask them their height but I don't think it's an outrageous thing for women to try to vet especially considering they probably have a zillion matches.
[10:03] Mike: Yeah I mean you know why they're outraged right? Yes, not well. Okay, you're being very pragmatic but there but I would say at ah another level. They're outraged because that type of vetting is totally contrary to the sort of social.
[10:04] Keith: The men because they're short.
[10:21] Mike: To to what women typically would say in polite society about how they select men. No no, they don't you really think I mean men might say that but it would be a wink and nod thing I think women say in their very being very genuine that like look I you know.
[10:23] Keith: Yeah, but men would say that they don't care about press size too right? like it's.
[10:37] Mike: Ah, you know a track you know I'm looking for somebody that has these qualities and it's not particularly physically related guys I think I mean everybody knows what guys are looking for. It's not. It's not serious.
[10:42] Keith: I mean are women allowed are women allowed to prefer men who are in shape.
[10:47] Mike: I Think they're allowed to do anything I'm just saying that it's the hypocrisy that bothers guys. Not it's it's not. It's not something I mean of course. Okay, you're right on some level that it's because they don't fit the narrative they're they're too short but on another level they're they're they're angry because of hypocrisy.
[11:02] Keith: Yeah.
[11:05] Mike: At least like own it at least be like there actually to be fair, you do see a fair I do see fairly frequently women owning the notion that they want taller guys like that's a very I think that's the most standard requirement. It's like it's like we were oh God I've been watching I watched the entire season of the bachelorette.
[11:14] Keith: Um, yeah.
[11:24] Keith: Whoa is it over. You should watch the bachelor. The bachelor's better because instead of there're just being like 1 annoying woman. There's 30 annoying women. But at least you know, but but.
[11:25] Mike: This yeah, this is really embarrassing. Well obviously yes I know yes yes yeah like 60 sixty bouncing bouncing breasts is better than two I know.
[11:38] Keith: 25 of them are like just like objectively attractive and correct wait. What how did that work. Maybe it's not interesting.
[11:45] Mike: There were two bachelorates which is a good move by Abc or whoever puts on the show because not interesting, but the essentially they they had a pool of guys and then the guys had to self-elect and there was some tension because some of the guys tried to like switch between the girls and wasn't clear who they were going after and they just created drama right.
[12:01] Keith: Ah I mean it breaks the whole premise the premise of this show is that all of the contestants are like in love with the with the bachelor or bachelorette at the start right? there's it's never, there's never a question I mean sometimes people recuse themselves. But it's always a huge scandal when they do.
[12:17] Mike: Yeah I mean that had to happen a few times because people switched teams and there was also you know I mean whatever this isn't that interesting but like there were yeah there was some amount of jockeying. It's obvious that people want to become the bachelor I think that's actually the goal is to get close to the end but then lose.
[12:20] Keith: Right.
[12:32] Keith: Yes, you to get you want to maximize your celebrity and the way you maximize your celebrity is you don't win you you come close to winning and then you do things the way that Abc likes so that they ah choose you to be the next bachelor bachelorette.
[12:35] Mike: Right? yeah.
[12:48] Mike: Is it actually Abc I just guessed. Okay, so the things I wanted to say number 1 is and this is just the way I I'm just calling balls and strikes the way I saw it. Ah so no, no flame mails on this. My take was that like.
[12:49] Keith: I Think it is.
[13:01] Mike: There were a several non ethnicically Caucasian men who were kept in the pool ah in a couple of different ethnicities actually where it was obvious to me they were going to be removed and they were just being kept there. This is relation to your height thing. Yeah.
[13:13] Keith: Right? Okay, so yes, so I've seen ah probably 10 to 15 seasons of of that show. Um I've I've probably seen like 5 all the way through and then another you know, 5 to 10 I've seen you know a subset of the episodes.
[13:21] Mike: That's rough.
[13:30] Keith: But yes, the contestants know that if they get rid of all the black people on the first episode they're going to catch some smoke for that and they need to keep around cannon fodder because after the first couple weeks they already know who like their final 5 or final you know 6 or 7 are going to be and so they just keep can or fought cannon fodder around. And why? not just keep an ethnically diverse cannon fodder around. Ah.
[13:54] Mike: Well I mean it's to an a reasonably intelligent audience. It's obvious they're doing that it wasn't it was actually a asian-american guy and and a couple black guys but but but fair enough. Ah 1 of the ethnicities was african-american but um, ah.
[14:00] Keith: Sure.
[14:07] Mike: So that So yeah, but that reminds me of like the height thing like they're they're yes, they're not being sort of upfront and it was obvious to me for a variety of reasons. So like they were just going to get screened out because that's what what was going on. Ah and then yeah I mean the ah the yeah I mean the decision criteria are.
[14:17] Keith: Yep.
[14:26] Mike: Relatively arbitrary. These people are basically just children. Um, they're They're not very mature adults that are on this show. Um, and yes, they're just trying to maximize the celebrity I agree with all that.
[14:39] Keith: Yeah, the reason why I find this show interesting is it's It's a little bit like um, watching you know the world wrestling What is it Wwe W E Now it's it's fake but the people watching it.
[14:49] Mike: It it. It felt exactly like that. Yes.
[14:57] Keith: Get sort of confused like if you go to the bachelor or bachelor at subreddit I mean these people get really invested in the contestants and who they want to win and it's sort of interesting how well Abc produces the show to maximize social media interest in it. Now and I find that sort of interesting. It's like watching people lose money at a casino I find that fascinating to watch and like you'll hear them say like oh no, no, no, no, this is my strategy I have a strategy so that I never lose and it's like you realize that this is objectively false but they.
[15:17] Mike: Yeah, um I would yeah see yes.
[15:34] Keith: Seem really confused about it and the popularity of the show sort of speaks for itself.
[15:36] Mike: Yeah, no I've had people I've had a couple of times when somebody tried to explain you how they have a winning strategy for craps and it's like look that that's actually impossible like if you have a great give it to me and I great I mean it's awesome like I have plenty of money I can I can stand there and do it if I need to but it's just not going to work.
[15:42] Keith: Right.
[15:49] Keith: Um, well it would it yeah would have to be using a weighted or or ah, a faulty wheel.
[15:57] Mike: It's that they don't understand statistics like they're they're morons but um, a couple things 1 of the two bachelorettes. Ah, the guy who she selected in my view very clearly engineered a situation where he had kissed some other girl and they broke up and.
[16:09] Keith: Um, yeah.
[16:14] Mike: It's very clear to me that he did all of these things to maximize. Yeah I was just looking at like this guy his entire goal here is probably to be a celebrity get on Tv but also like I mean if he goes to the club now in l a I mean he's just got a law lineup of hot chicks that he's got available to him. So.
[16:24] Keith: Right? right? yes.
[16:30] Mike: So my view is it's clearly and in in the whole. It's just a circus running around. That's very clearly what his goal is ah there And yeah I agree Yeah, it's It's just a nonsensical. It's yeah, it's just ah, it's just it's it's completely world wrestling fact oh and the other thing sorry the other thing was that.
[16:48] Mike: Ah, during the selection process a couple things like they show the guys jobs. It's when it's if it's the bachelor picking women. Well it's just going to be attractiveness and like compatibilities that makes sense but this was set up I assume when you say you've seen 15 seasons of this. You've watched the bachelorette a few times right? Okay, so this was set up the same way.
[17:01] Keith: Yes.
[17:06] Mike: So that the woman's selection criteria was basically compatibility with the man and attractiveness which is fucking preposterous that is not how women select men. First of all, there was never any conversation about what jobs these guys had except for 1 guy who took her to meet his family in New Jersey and you find out that he works.
[17:18] Keith: Right.
[17:25] Mike: On like the Jersey Shore like he runs a carnival ride and I'm like what like as soon she finds that out like you're like seriously and their jobs are their job. Descriptions are always kind of vague but you can tell none of them have real jobs. Yeah.
[17:32] Keith: Ah, right to be fair Mike Mike I mean after the show they all just moved to l a and then bathe in their celebrity for a bit.
[17:44] Mike: Okay, but at least like yeah, okay, but it's just calm if it's surprising to me that the show has any audience because the converse like the things the women do to try to vet these things and the women's families when they're trying to vt them are just about Well how how much do you love each other and all this stuff he but.
[17:55] Keith: I mean what do they do? they they go on 4 dates. They go on 4 dates right? Sometimes 5
[18:04] Mike: Okay, but you could get a lot out of that if you for example, ask them like what they do for a living like that's the thing It's like you're not even asking like the first basic question like look. Maybe.
[18:07] Keith: Yeah, we don't see we don't see what happens off camera like they cut it to maximize the drama and so like what they normally do is you know they they know who the final 5 are when they're when they're editing it at the beginning. And they try to like create these arcs. It really is similar to wrestling where they're sort of creating these story arcs that people can sort of pick apart and try to predict and there's a bunch of blogs that try to handicap various odds and then there's this kind of reality Steve.
[18:28] Mike: So yeah, so.
[18:36] Mike: Okay, okay.
[18:45] Keith: Who almost always knows who the winner is before because somebody leaks it to him and he pays a lot for the leaks and anyway there's a whole cottage industry around it. But ah yeah, look we don't know what happens off camera We only we only get to see.
[18:50] Mike: Okay, how to do this.
[19:01] Keith: You know one percent of the interactions between these people but I'm pretty confident the interactions between these people are just completely worthless like I don't think they are vetting with any kind of strategy.
[19:12] Mike: Okay, but this leads into something we talked about before the show which is um okay I think that most of the viewership of the bachelorette and possibly the bachelor's women and I base that on the fact that like the audience for the live shows was mostly okay so that that makes sense to me.
[19:21] Keith: It is yeah oh yeah, oh yeah, did they still do what after the final rose or before the final ride can remember what it's called.
[19:30] Mike: Yeah, yeah, they have they have yeah they have these various live things. It's all women in the audience right? Um I don't know it's some man who used to be the bachelor. But here here's the point I want to make this a guy got candy wear a black face or something.
[19:35] Keith: Yeah, who's the host now I had seen it. Okay, yeah, some guy got canceled Sorry go ahead? No no, no, no ah that the ah.
[19:47] Mike: good old good old Minstrel Steve
[19:51] Keith: The host for like the first 30 seasons or whatever was this guy I think his name was Chris Harrison and yeah he got canceled because there was a black contestant and something happened with her and then I think he was interviewing her or he was interviewing another former black contestant and. He sort of did a little bit of victim blaming and that was it he got he got canceled. Yeah.
[20:15] Mike: All right? Well sorry for him but the ah let's see so the thing that I think is it so look women are watching this I think because okay there could be a professional wrestling element to this of like oh we all know this is fake but I suspect. It's like. The vetting process. They're seeing there of men. They think like actually is somewhat related like related to the vetting process that any woman would use so they're delusional about how they pick people. Yeah yeah.
[20:38] Keith: Yeah, can I just yeah, can I say 1 more thing. Ah, they carefully psychologically screen the contestants and they're looking for people who they think will buy into the bullshit that is the show and that will you know and I think they probably try to get. You know some people who they think will create max drama and so ah, most of the contestants. Actually I mean they can fake the psychological screening and I think there's like 30 candidates and so you know they're not going to be perfect in picking ones that are all bought in. But for the most part these people. Believe the Bs that's good that they're being spoon fed I'm here to find love you know that kind of thing.
[21:17] Mike: Okay, and what the point is that that means see but I'm not actually talking I'm not actually complaining about that I'm complaining about women watching and finding believable a female methodology that looks for men based on compatibility which is important. And attractiveness which is important but the number 1 thing or like way up there with that is like the guy being you know, somebody who goes to work stable like a smart clever you know all the things that actually matter in a world like at a capitalistic society and so forth and.
[21:42] Keith: Stable.
[21:50] Keith: Mike that's why they do the athletic competitions. She can see them in gleitatorial combat. Do they still do that they don't do group dates where they have to like do some sort of stupid athletic thing.
[21:56] Mike: No well they do things where they take their shirts off a lot but like they never you know I mean they should do.
[22:09] Mike: No, they do that I mean what they what they obviously should do is some I mean look they should just have them sit down and do Iq tests but setting that aside, um, it reminds me of something we were talking about. Yeah for sure I mean for sure that's like how that's how she actually should do it. That's why it sort of offended me when she went.
[22:10] Keith: Like a Relay race or something.
[22:15] Keith: And him he sitting all down with the S a T I agree I agree. Yeah.
[22:25] Mike: When it was clear the ah Asian American guy was getting kicked off I'm like this guy's probably the smartest one there they should be serious about him. But anyway um, the ah ah I think something similar goes on on sugar Lifestyle Forum a subredit that we both frequent. Ah, where women.
[22:42] Keith: Um.
[22:44] Mike: And men I think make ah nonsensical choices and in in this case I would focus on the women like I mean would you agree with me that women on the sort of sugar baby sugar daddy thing have a really really what they should want is a guy who is maximally successful. Like reasonable looking reasonable age things like that but maximally successful. Maximally able to either both I'd say both and provide for her and provide open doors to her in her life to do what she wants to do in fact, my impression from that subreddit is. All just get tricked by guys who make like $80000 a year and allocate 30000 of that 80000 to hand out money to these chicks. What's your take on that.
[23:24] Keith: Yes I think that is the majority of quote sugar daddies are people that can't really afford it. Ah I think the majority of the sort of.
[23:40] Keith: Cliche or stereotypical sugar daddy it's it's something like you know like this James Bond billionaire type who you know has all this money but I just don't think I think men like that don't need to use a website to meet women they are in situations where they're going to meet women.
[23:47] Mike: Right? so.
[23:58] Mike: Right? left.
[23:59] Keith: Anyway, and so what's left are well for the majority of people on both sides of the equation on seeking dot com are scammers. But when you once you strip out the scammers. Yeah, it's like these sort of loser desperate men who are in often dead end. Marriages um or dead end relationships or there's something wrong with them so they can't traditionally date and then on the on the female side. There's some women who you know are like just sex positive and have figured out that this is um, like a good way for them to make some extra money. But. The the majority of the women on there are sort of I mean it's really depressing. They're like broken in some way like their profiles are written sort of terribly and and you know when you when you line up these sort of desperate sleazy men with these sort of Desperate. Um. Inexperienced women. It's just a recipe for disaster. Um that the women get taken advantage of the men get you know, get taken advantage of it's It's a mess.
[25:00] Mike: Yeah, some.
[25:09] Mike: Someone can spunk and try to find my Reddit account this happened once before already I got in an argument with somebody I did ah well not badly. They just said hi on Reddit but and they they were right? um somebody ah so I got a new argument somebody about whether a truly wealthy person would have a car loan.
[25:13] Keith: That's true. You got doxed.
[25:18] Keith: Yeah.
[25:26] Mike: I Don't want to go further than that. But the the answer is they wouldn't um, but basically basically they wouldn't ah you would agree that um, there's there's an equivalent thing going the opposite direction which is the men who sort of simp simp for the sugar babies is that the right word s simp for is that how I should say that okay and that's like.
[25:31] Keith: Um, yeah.
[25:40] Keith: Yes, yes.
[25:45] Mike: There was a recent posting there where a guy was really excited I think because his sugar baby graduated college or something or graduated seriously. Okay, yeah I mean they get but they'll get into it as if it's a real relationship and there I think they're making the same mistake in reverse right.
[25:51] Keith: Ah, yeah, that tea.
[25:57] Keith: Um, yeah, Well I think it's possible to use seeking dotcom to create a relationship where I mean if it's a real wealthy man. And he's generous. He can use that as a springboard to get in with somebody who he may not normally be able to and if he's a good person you can imagine the woman actually falling for him. So It's like ah it's like a device to get your foot in the door. And you can imagine some legitimate feelings developing in such a situation but I mean that's just such a tiny percentage of what's going on there. What's going on there generally is something more akin to ah the short term.
[26:38] Mike: But that's not what's how I'm yeah going.
[26:54] Keith: Ah relationships Sometimes you know maybe they'll go on a few dates. Um, but yeah, with almost all of the sort of romantic stories that you read on the forum or or hear about on seeking dot com or sort of.
[27:12] Keith: Yeah, they're not. They're not a realistic expectation Yes, because oftentimes I think the man is delusional about whether the woman actually cares about him or the other way around like you'll hear women saying like oh my sugar daddy is so great.
[27:14] Mike: Um, will they enrage you don't they yes.
[27:30] Keith: You know he does this this and this and then you know the next week. She's like how he just goes to bed I don't understand why it's like well I understand why does she not actually understand why? Yeah, whatever it is like for some reason she was no longer ah interesting to to him and so he just dropped her.
[27:36] Mike: Yeah, it's because she didn't It's because she didn't do anal like.
[27:49] Keith: And then it sometimes happens in reverse too like the man will be like look I offered her this this and this and then you know she doesn't return my texts like what's going on. It's like well you're kind of you're ugly to her for some reason I don't know why it is Maybe you're saying weird things. Maybe you look a certain way. Maybe you don't right.
[28:02] Mike: Maybe it's because he has a car loan.
[28:07] Keith: Maybe he doesn't wash his balls and you know she finds that grows whatever it is like yeah I Just think when people romanticize sugar relationships I get sort of upset.
[28:12] Mike: No I don't think I mean well Okay, yes, all right agreed agreed Yeah, a lot of a lot of troubled people out there.
[28:22] Keith: You know? but I mean I do think that young women could greatly benefit by expanding their search criteria to older men like let's say. You're a student at University Of California in Berkeley and you're pretty and you're pretty smart. Ah, but you know you don't really want to get a job for various reasons and you know you want to try a couple michelin star restaurants all right? well.
[28:45] Mike: Ah.
[28:59] Keith: I do think that there's probably a set of you know, rich tech companies employees. You know when they're late 30 s forty s fifty s who could the who are probably better in bed than any of the young men. They'd be considering you know in and their university. Ah, they're probably better behaved that is to say they're not just like totally ah, you know they have prefrontal cortexes that are developed. Um, they you know can say things that are you know, mildly compelling they they might have ends that that could be useful in their career. And they're going to be wealthy. They're going to have like experiences that they can share and you know I think some women aren't attracted to older men. But I think far more women are attracted to older men than men are attracted to older women and so yeah I just think there's like a ah cheat code for the precocious young woman who's. Willing to think outside the box a little bit.
[29:58] Mike: This is a great sales pitch and people should contact Keith at y m m v pod at gmail.com if they're interested in applying. Um, yeah I mean the lovely young ladies.
[30:07] Keith: Yeah I think I am a fantastic I think I am ah yeah, a fantastic person to date for a little while I took this ah a few years ago I took a ah ah I took a girl that I met on seeking dotcom to a show.
[30:15] Mike: Ah I took.
[30:25] Keith: Was I remember what it was. It was some play at one of the theaters in downtown San Francisco and um, we did that I think she came over to my house once we were not to dinner once think we went on 3 total dates and I'm still. Lightly in touch with her and she's still like oh that was you know one of the greatest nights of my life when we went to show that was so great and yeah I just think that if you can yeah I think that that was a mutually beneficial arrangement as they say.
[30:58] Mike: Yeah, yeah, and Keith will also tell you he'll let you nay tell you to sit on his face. Well this is more than that exactly yeah, that's what it is yeah.
[31:07] Keith: Yeah I do I do like going down on people or having them go up on me is that what's what what do you call that? um well I have a number of emails and Reddit topics here. Should we move on.
[31:17] Mike: All the way up.
[31:22] Mike: Yes, oh yeah, it's the top thing on on Reddit right now.
[31:25] Keith: Should we do this pegging one. it's it's 2 yeah did you see the follow up. Yeah I need to make sure I find the follow up here. But it's pretty easy to find. Ah, let's see here all right? So all right.
[31:32] Mike: I did.
[31:44] Keith: This person says mom walked in on me pegging my boyfriend. So Jesus Christ here weak. So Jesus Christ here we go so my boyfriend lives like family which I mean just that first clause is is already confusing.
[31:46] Mike: Now this happened to me once now I'm kidding.
[32:02] Keith: Lives with my family and I and my family loves him and he's the happiest He's ever been I Also love living with him because that means we have more time to be alone and intimate. However, we've both been extremely busy as of late and haven't had much time too this morning My boyfriend and I were home alone and we both had a day off. So I suggested maybe we do something We both love since we haven't had our alone time in a bit and I suggested I peg him.
[32:20] Mike: 6
[32:22] Keith: Pegging is something he fucking loves loves in all caps and it gets me off really hard so it was a no-brainer when we started. We were both in total ecstasy. So this person hasn't said their age but just from their writing I'm guessing late teens early 20 s plus they live with.
[32:26] Mike: So.
[32:35] Mike: Ah, has to be a female because of the word Pegg can can it be a male if it's pegging i.
[32:41] Keith: I Don't think men call that pegging. No no ah I get.
[32:43] Mike: It's right, It would be really weird if it was a guy right? because they he'd say why I don't like to use my penis I use another dildo So that's I think it's I think we can safely say it's a woman and of course I'm a little confused by how she's in ecstasy during that. But okay.
[32:48] Keith: Right.
[32:58] Keith: I Mean she's young enough that I don't really trust her to really understand what her sexual proclivities are anyway, all right? However, as I was going to town on him. My mother walked in to get her car Keys I used last night and she full on saw what was happening.
[33:03] Mike: Okay.
[33:13] Mike: And she on saw me as happening that like f frozenze and she just went like on.
[33:15] Keith: Boyfriend and I froze and she just went oh my god I'm so so I'm so sorry I just need my keys and I quickly grabbed them but threw them out the door and she left. My boyfriend is now terrified. She thinks less of him or is judging him or laughing at him hasn't even gone out of her room all day and I had to bring him up food I haven't seen my mom since and I'm also pretty fucking embarrassed she gets home in 3 hours so what should I do. All right? if you let your child's partner live with you I mean ah, wouldn't you just knock it I mean even if you think you're going to go into the room I would like you know.
[33:43] Mike: Ah.
[33:52] Keith: Rattle The the railing of the staircase I would make it as clear as I possibly could that I was coming and then I would I would not I would never just like walk in on them. That's seems.
[34:01] Mike: Yeah I would think that the female thrusting action during pegging would be maladroit enough then it would be kind of noisy on the bed and ah I'm sort of wondering if the mom wasn't coming up to get some step mom action wait mother in-law action. But but okay.
[34:14] Keith: Our my.
[34:19] Mike: Yeah I mean like this is not a good situation because this is a line that would be tricky across I mean here's the thing we've talked about this before Keith like have you ever been pegged. Okay me either. But let me ask you this follow-up question.
[34:30] Keith: No I have not.
[34:36] Mike: If you had been pegged would you tell me me either. So we actually don't know. No no I know but it's a but of my point being that like actually like and I think this is typical. It's it's a behavior that guys don't really want to reveal. So unfortunately yeah, like.
[34:38] Keith: Um, no I recognize that paradox but I actually have not been fagged.
[34:50] Keith: Yeah I mean I get why he's upset about this of course he is.
[34:57] Mike: It's much worse than I mean I had a friend a female friend who got walked in and on she was traumatized enough about it afterward that she said she described as we got walked in on and we were not facing the same way was the way she described it they were in the dog. Obviously she was not happy with that. This is like.
[35:11] Keith: Ah.
[35:14] Mike: 10 times worse. It's actually not even on the same page like this is much more problematic right.
[35:17] Keith: Yeah, everyone has tried dogie style I would say that dogie style is probably a ninety fifth percentile sex act that's been tried and peggings probably 20 or twenty fifth percentile maybe less I don't know okay, that.
[35:26] Mike: Exactly yeah.
[35:32] Mike: I go with less. Yeah, it's uncommon and it's definitely. It's definitely. Ah yeah I mean for whatever reason anal play toward the man in the man's direction is considered a big gay.
[35:34] Keith: Something in that range.
[35:42] Keith: Yeah I mean that's changing and probably should but for now here we are There is a follow up to this are you I mean the swallow up's not that interesting and it gets into some trauma that the that the boyfriend has but.
[35:49] Mike: Yeah, yeah, okay. You mean anal trauma or rectal or emotional okay sex. Oh Lord nicely.
[36:00] Keith: Ah, now. Sadly, it's much more depressing. Yeah and he was sexually abused as a child so there you go I mean basically I guess the mom said sorry she offered to put a knock. She said that she respected her. And her boyfriend's privacy and she's very sorry. Um.
[36:21] Mike: What do you think? that's all about So so okay, that's this, there's a common thing here I mean I don't wanna get too psychological but like it's pretty common for people to be into something that was an abuse that was done to them as a kid when I mean do have you encountered I.
[36:34] Keith: Um, yeah.
[36:38] Mike: I Don't think I have anything like this I mean I have various psychological issues but not like I don't think there's something where it's like oh it makes such and so into a turn on for me have you like I mean I think you've probably encountered a partner at least who had something like that right? any insight into like why.
[36:47] Keith: Um, yeah, yes, yeah I don't know and I don't know why sexual trauma especially ah, young, sexual trauma often.
[36:54] Mike: Transmutes into that like it's like oh this thing was done to me that yeah and.
[37:04] Keith: Yeah, transmutes a good word um into some sort of unusual proclivities later in life I'm not sure. Yeah.
[37:10] Mike: Like for the thing that was traumatic on some level like I'm I'm just guessing without any I haven't read this post but I'm guessing the guy was pegged or something like that as a child. Maybe okay, a man. Yeah, and so now he.
[37:19] Keith: She doesn't say but almost all sexual abuse comes from men. So.
[37:28] Mike: You because you could see it being the opposite that he'd be like no no, that's a nogo zone for me and that would make sense. He's like yeah I don't I don't want anybody back there. Okay that but but saying no no I'm I'm going to really dig into it here. Enjoy it. It's like huh.
[37:35] Keith: Yeah, yeah, that's true. Actually it's almost bimodal like some people can't ever do anything around the thing that caused them the abuse and then some people can't get enough of it.
[37:49] Mike: Yeah, the the specific area where I've encountered this ah in my reading I've not encountered it with a partner that I knew of is um, you know, ah wanting to be degraded or very submissive you know, ah dom sub stuff and that relating to some kind of childhood.
[37:59] Keith: Yeah, yes.
[38:06] Mike: Physical abuse or maybe emotional and that's yeah, it sort of confuses me I don't know it's like you're reliving it and somehow that's cathartic for you and the the real thing I find confusing is it's like well. I Mean at some point you're an adult you know that's what you're doing and why does it still work and so you think that realizing what's going on would kind of defuse the power of it for you but it apparently doesn't.
[38:25] Keith: Yeah, yeah I think a lot of people don't introspect as much as they should on this kind of stuff too and so patterns develop and they don't quite understand why and then they get calcified. Let's move on this is depressing. Um.
[38:37] Mike: That sounds right? yeah.
[38:42] Keith: Like this one fiancee wants to have a hall pass slash open and I'm conflicted my 24 is a 24 year old man and his fiance is a twenty year old female. So my fiancee and I have been together for over 6 years. We have a house together 2 dogs and we're getting married next month
[38:44] Mike: Fiancee was go does slash and.
[38:58] Keith: Two months ago she brought up how she was feeling about all this was considering us both having hall passes so we could experience other people and bring possibly some new things we learned into our bedroom I'm her first and she's my second I was really hesitant and uncomfortable. But I agreed we both use our hall passes and she enjoyed it and had fun I enjoyed mine too. But I didn't have as much fun as she did and I was ready to be done I don't know how he ascertained that he didn't have as much fun as she did. But I'll go I'll read on. She says how she doesn't necessarily want to stop if I want her to she will. But she's having fun and wants to keep doing what we're doing again I reluctantly agree and we go forward. We sit up ground rules and give this a go. Over time. She's seen this guy total of 3 times and each time she does it. It's hard for me to wrap my head around it and feel comfortable. My my partner so this is his other partner had surgery so I couldn't do anything until next week honestly I don't want to keep doing this and I just want our sex lives to be with each other. We have good sex life. Apparently not. We're intimate often. We satisfy each other and we both bring new ideas in the bedroom. So things. Don't get too boring. Yeah, he's misreading she said before that if I asked her to we would end things. But I think one of the main things that bothers me is that she's only stopped because I want her to not because she wants to at the very least she'd want to stop because she sees I'm almost done here. She sees how uncomfortable I am with everything but I don't think that's the case words she'll grow to resent me for making her stop and I don't want to want that to be a problem in our relationship. She told me she doesn't need this and it was just for us both to have some fun I'm not sure what to do here should I put an end to this arrangement and risk a resentment or should I change it.
[40:29] Keith: Just sending pictures and flirting with other people but no sex or should I keep on the course and hopefully become more okay with the situation maybe because my partner's been out of commission I've been a bit jealous I don't know what to do? Thank you for reading this far I have some thoughts but go ahead.
[40:42] Mike: I Find the whole thing confusing. But yeah well I just find it confusing because it's like I Always think the issue is that for the man it would be so much harder to find another person and so the way in which he's saying it was He doesn't talk about that at all. So It's kind of Confusing. It's like okay it was just as easy for you each to find. Partner of course his just had a surgery so maybe kind of kind of it matters a little bit. What the surgery was um in general I would think men would be more excited about this kind of arrangement than women and so the fact that the woman's excited about it.
[41:05] Keith: There's something wrong with her. Yeah yeah, hopefully not guessed her by best.
[41:20] Mike: It seems risky or problematic. You know? yeah.
[41:24] Keith: Yeah I mean I don't really know how this works I mean Elissa and I are E and M but neither of us have had sex with anybody so I haven't had to wrestle with ah this. Particular thing but I I Just don't think it would bother me that much. Um, the the problem I think we would have is that yeah I Just don't think I I don't think I can find other sexual partners easily.
[41:50] Mike: Wait you don't you don't you don't think it would bother you if Alissa told you hey I've got 2 other guys that I'm having sex with once a week
[42:03] Keith: Ah I mean so you're arguing by absolute extreme here right? So she's getting getting plowed by 2 different other men. Ah I'm trying to use strong language here to make it as as uncomfortable as possible. Ah 2 other men.
[42:07] Mike: Next Oh that extreme. Okay.
[42:21] Keith: You know, maybe 1 of them is a porn star and the other one's a firefighter and yeah, it's you know, Maximally ah, potentially sexually humiliating. Yeah I don't think I I don't think I think it would bother me some but I don't think I think i'm.
[42:24] Mike: Oh my lord. Yes.
[42:31] Mike: Exactly yes.
[42:41] Keith: Broken in that I don't feel Actually I think I'm enlightened and that I don't feel jealous about that as much as some people do.
[42:47] Mike: So what if one of them was Pete Davidson and the other was Ryan Gosling
[42:53] Keith: Ah I would be happy for our new financial windfall.
[43:00] Mike: There We go, you'd be like don't please stop using Birth control now. Um fair point. Um, okay so you you would not.
[43:02] Keith: Yeah, yeah, with riot goes like please please do with me Davids and yeah.
[43:14] Mike: But but I thought in the past that you oh right now your concern is that the woman in the arrangement would become jealous.
[43:20] Keith: I think it is unlikely that and I'm curious what relationships with other people that are explicitly and honestly sort of secondary to a primary relationship I don't know. How feelings develop in such a situation but I could imagine Alyssa being uncomfortable with conversation like wanting to audit conversations I'm having with with the third person and yeah, so there's some.
[43:52] Mike: Yeah.
[43:59] Keith: There's some issues there and I yeah I just don't think I feel like I could detect if a lizza wasn't that into me anymore. So like if there if there was a third person and she was like falling for him I think I could detect that and I think if you really care about your partner. You actually should not want to obstruct them from falling for somebody else, right? that kind of thing.
[44:26] Mike: Oh interesting if you love them, let them go so not to bum our listeners out by bringing up the bachelorette again but I will ah so it was obvious to me in this show. First of all I mean so this is a major issue for the men I assume it is for the women in the bachelor as well. I don't haven't watched that fully. Um. But the men like right at the beginning actually one of the men he got kicked off because he ah because it was offensive to the women that he'd even said this he said something like look ah you know and there's like 30 men. He's like look when if I get to the end and I guess there's some date at the end where they are It's like there's a fuck date. It's like a overnight or something there. We go.
[44:57] Keith: Yes, the fantasy suite.
[45:03] Mike: So he said look you know for I fight is virtually when I get to the fantasy suit. He was pretty confident. Um, if ah if what's her name. The girl has sex with another guy before me or whatever at the same time. That's that's it.
[45:09] Keith: Um, this is.
[45:17] Mike: Ah, can't tolerate that. So this guy was very clear like that was one of his primary things and of course he got kicked off for it because apparently you're supposed to be genderless when you're at that stage.
[45:25] Keith: Um, yeah I mean a premise of the show is that the person who you're about to get proposed to by or your but I guess the men are supposed to technically propose. But ah.
[45:39] Mike: That's right.
[45:41] Keith: Yeah, like the woman in the bachelorette. She I think there's 3 people when it gets to the fantasy suite dates and and I don't know over it I don't know if it's over the course of 3 nights or 5 nights or whatever. But yeah, she sleeps with all 3 guys and that.
[45:55] Mike: Well, but in this case in this case, well one of them actually only had 1 guy by that point. So there you go but the other one had multiple and it was very clear that ah one of the guys and it's the guy who's the new bachelor I think I think that's right.
[46:08] Keith: Um, ah.
[46:08] Mike: He yeah I was because he he basically took himself out of the running and that was because during that fantasy sweet day like it was platonic and he's like okay I see what's going on here. Yeah yeah, so she basically wouldn't have sex with him but I guess she had sex with the other 2 guys. Although it's not clear ah point my main point here being that like even in that like sort of.
[46:15] Keith: Oh really, oh wow.
[46:28] Mike: World Wrestling federation version of a relationship. The women are sort of like there's There's a significant problem with the guys like guarding the henhouse.
[46:37] Keith: Yeah, there's always drama around the fantasy suite ah be I mean the premise really is preposterous right.
[46:43] Mike: When it wait when it's the bachelor and there are multiple women is there still drama to the women guard The hen house too. Are they like oh he he stuck it in you too.
[46:49] Keith: I Mean the women always talk about how oh it's really hard for me. You know I'm falling in love with you or I'm in love with you and but I know that you're seeing other women and this is really hard. It's like ok sure. But that's the show. This is what you signed up for.
[47:04] Mike: It just seems more problem. It seems more problematic to me when the penises are all going in the same honey pot than when it's one penis going in multiple places right? But yeah and yet if your a girlfriend were.
[47:11] Keith: Yeah I would not want to go Third that's for sure.
[47:21] Keith: Um, yeah.
[47:21] Mike: In an e m guy with another guy once a week and it was ah the fireman say you you would after 24 hours you'd feel like his semen was gone.
[47:30] Keith: Yeah I probably there would probably I would probably want to wait a little bit longer than that. But yeah I would probably insist she is as condoms too.
[47:36] Mike: Okay I did see a guy on Tiktok created. No, it wasn't couldn't have been Tiktok because it was let me finish this. There was a guy who created it must have been on not I don't know where it was on the internet. It was probably on e fucked. That's the worst but a guy had attached a.
[47:49] Keith: Okay.
[47:55] Mike: He cut. Ah he basically cut he had it hollow dildo and he cut it in half not lengthwise but across the shaft and attached to a vacuum so you could vacuum out a woman's vagina and he he it well I know a guy built it I know a guy built that that's why I say.
[48:03] Keith: Aha.
[48:07] Keith: What did he use this. What did he use this device for why he thought that she was philandering and so he wanted to use this as a precaution with a.
[48:12] Mike: It was it was used on a woman I don't Know. No, he was trying to he was trying to pleasure her sexually. It didn't work So Great now now.
[48:26] Keith: Vacuum.
[48:30] Keith: I'm not surprised. Yeah yeah, but I mean I think most attempts at ethical non-monogamy and like they do with this guy and it might be the man. It might be the woman but 1 1 party gets jealous. And the other party is like this is awesome.
[48:53] Mike: Yeah problem. Well I mean there are 3 parties right? So then there's third party who I guess yeah, someone's going to get jealous most likely I don't know I would not I would like.
[48:56] Keith: Now yeah I'm I'm guessing the third party is often sort of left out the cold like they're sort of hopeful that they can convert or never.
[49:09] Mike: I would like you to do this because there's some things I want to know like for example, you know is it compelling to have 2 women sort of where they do that thing where they lick on the right and the left side of your cock at the same time is that compelling? Um, so.
[49:19] Keith: Okay, well well a threesome is sort of like advanced ethical non-monogamy.
[49:26] Mike: Ah, that's true that's true I think you could I think if you could get a woman to do EM you could get I I actually think it's like if it takes 5 steps to get to e m second relationship I think it's only like another exactly I think that getting it to the threesome.
[49:39] Keith: It's like five and a half I agree I agree and a little and Alyssa and Alyssa's down so
[49:44] Mike: Yeah, would not be hard and so yeah and that's where like the there's some information that I'd like to get about that. Um, get like a fuck licking. You know what that is.
[49:49] Keith: Um, yeah.
[49:59] Keith: Ah, we discussed this a couple episodes but I've already forgotten.
[50:03] Mike: It's where you're banging. You're you're having sex Intercourse Pi V with one of the women and the other woman is like licking kind of the junction of your bodies you know? Um, yeah, and there are various things like that you know that would be interesting I'm not interested in stories about Mmf which is probably what I'll wind up getting So yes.
[50:08] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
[50:19] Keith: No I'm not going to snap pets I've not offered that tool as ah I don't think there's any circumstance I Just don't want a man in the bedroom.
[50:20] Mike: No okay, no no chance of that that interesting.
[50:30] Mike: No, we've established before that if someone gave you a certain amount of money you do it I Forget how much it's not that much. Yeah, so that's the circumstance.
[50:34] Keith: Absolutely absolutely. Well Yeah, but I would do anything for a certain amount of money but the amount of money that it would take to like have a man sodomize me is probably.
[50:44] Mike: Right? Got him got him.
[50:54] Keith: Lower for me than it is for many people but I think many people just aren't realistically thinking about it.
[50:59] Mike: I Also saw a link to ah a thing. It's slash our slash sounding. It doesn't sound like much but sounding is when you stick things down your peehole your urethra of your penis and somebody stuck.
[51:11] Keith: Um, that's different. That's different than that's different from docking.
[51:16] Mike: Docking is when you have 2 penises face to face and you're it's like docking is like that joke from the Tv. Yeah there was a Tv tv show of silicon valley. There's like a whole bit about that about like how quickly you could jerk off like a crowd of men.
[51:19] Keith: Um, yeah, ah your 4 skins go over each other.
[51:32] Mike: And like they're doing all these algorithmic puzzles and it's like well you could stroke back and forth. So basically the net is that like 1 guy should be able to beat off 4 guys at a time because he has them dock head to-head and then he goes back and forth right? And then there's a height differential you have to correct for but ah sounding is when you stick something down the pe-ho yeah, and ah.
[51:33] Keith: Right.
[51:40] Keith: Yeah, yeah I I remember that episode.
[51:50] Mike: The ah the thing that um this persons stuck down the peehold was multiple glow sticks I don't that well you know those little glow stick things you get for like Halloween that you crack them? Yeah, it was 5 in a pentagon pattern.
[51:56] Keith: What do you mean multiple I know what a glow stick is that that I said what do you mean? multiple? Not what are you being glow stick.
[52:09] Mike: Down his urethra. Yeah normal length I mean these guys can get stuff all the way down to the base of the penis are sounding. We'll look for it Maybe post it with the show notes.
[52:09] Keith: I Don't ah know I know how long were they.
[52:16] Keith: I don't. Oh I know what you mean by 5 you mean it was it was 5 they were like this that yeah got it. Got it. That's still quite wide though.
[52:27] Mike: Oh not long, no not 5 long. It was five horizontally. Yes, yes, yes, which is cool because it makes your it's quite wide and it made his penis have this first of all, you could sort of see the internal structure of the penis because it glowed and so exactly.
[52:39] Keith: Ah, this is like when ah like bugs bunnies while I was an anvil or something you can see it. It is in his neck. Yeah oh my lord.
[52:45] Mike: Yes, and there were the multiple colors it was like a rainbow glowing penis. It's great. So I don't know how much it would cost for you to do that. Probably a lot. But.
[52:52] Keith: Yeah I don't think I I think that's the kind of thing you have to train up to like those ping pong girls in Thailand that they don't start putting 20 ping pong balls up there.
[53:06] Mike: Oh that's right? That's right, No, it's definitely something that requires a substantial amount of effort. Yeah people if they're if they're queasy or whatever they have people should stay out of that subred unless you're sure of you. Want to see it sounding s O U N D I N G but with that ah nsl l.
[53:11] Keith: You know? ah.
[53:13] Keith: Um, what is the subrightd again. Yeah yeah, now I'm not that's gonna be a hard pass for me. Okay, this person says I sucked my friend off yesterday and he basically ignored me today. This is from a 18 year old female.
[53:22] Mike: Label on it. Yeah says.
[53:34] Keith: I've known him for almost eight years now ever since he moved onto the block and I always found him cute even if he could be a bit annoying. He got dumped not too long ago and he has been pretty bummed about it. So yesterday I offered to help him take his mind off it. It wasn't my first but it just felt different afterwards. We went on with the rest of our day come today basically acted like I wasn't there. Now I'm unsure that I made the right call rough.
[53:57] Mike: Yeah I mean eight years I mean he yeah you like he doesn't know what to do because he he he's not attracted to you but he yeah I mean you tempted an 18 year old approximately with a blow right.
[54:09] Keith: Yeah yesterday I offered to help him take his mind off it I mean that's gonna be a yes from just about any 18 year old
[54:16] Mike: It would take a lot of presence of mind to say no to that right? I mean yeah.
[54:25] Keith: Oh yeah I well yeah I might project the consequences of such an action more than most but probably not when I was 18 Um.
[54:38] Mike: Now it'd be worth it. You'd say look like this look. We were probably going to stop being friends Anyway, you know.
[54:42] Keith: Yeah I do think I could say something slightly positive about this to her. So if she was 27 and this happened I would be like man. You definitely did something wrong like it was a really bad blowjob or something. But in this case I'm guessing the guy is just like young and sort of confused and yeah, he's probably not that into her but it doesn't necessarily mean that she gave him some sort of terrible blowjob.
[55:06] Mike: Oh no I don't think it means that at all I think it just means that he's He's not attracted to her I mean he he doesn't have access to blowjobs. Basically so he's like oh great, you know like it's not easy for him to get access to and I mean I think in general.
[55:10] Keith: Sure for whatever reason though, it in it. Um, right.
[55:24] Mike: If you take a guy who's below a certain attractiveness level and you offer him make him this offer. He's going to say yes of any age really and yeah and then and then he's not going to know how to react now. The best thing she could do. Of course she likes him so she doesn't know you know that's the problem here. But of course the best thing to do would just be like hey you know that was fun.
[55:43] Keith: Um, yeah.
[55:43] Mike: I'm not I don't expect you to be my boyfriend or something but of course she she does expect that. That's the problem.
[55:48] Keith: Yeah I mean it's I mean she's young enough that this could be actually a fairly inexpensive life lesson right? like I'm not being like you know mean or patronizing here. But this going to happen to her probably a lot of times in her dating life and that it happens now is is is good. It's it sucks. But. But just sort of like what dating is like men can be.
[56:10] Mike: Don't you think most there's thing most women get this lesson in. Basically this way at around that age like they have some guy they kind of like him they are like oh maybe I'll me try playing this card. They play it. It works and they're like great and they thinking about him all the time and then he just goes them.
[56:15] Keith: Um, yes, probably probably? yeah.
[56:23] Keith: Yes I think that's probably a super common pattern.
[56:27] Mike: And it's really hard because like think about it like her last like imagine it's it's got I mean it's really painful actually because her last interaction with him is going to be basically right around his climax. So she's like oh my God he was so into me so excited then.
[56:41] Keith: Right? right? Yeah poor girl. Ah this person says I discovered a clitoral orgasm hack. Did you read this one.
[56:44] Mike: And then yes she just doesn't understand that delta at all actually kind of turns me on um I did.
[56:58] Keith: Remember if you sent this to me or if I found it I'm curious to know if anyone has tried this masturbation trick for my experience in order to come. There is an instantaneous threshold I have to cross like a point of no return and I cross it and as I cross it I know that I'm a second or 2 away from the finish line from there I relinquish control and let the floodgates open. But let's say I'm stuck at the threshold I know I'm really close but I'm not tipping the scale yet. Well one day I accidentally discovered that if I'm in that position I can gently kick my legs in the air to quickly and effectively induce orgasm so far. It's worked every time if you haven't tried this and what to give it a go. Let me know if it worked. I just liked the notion of having to do some sort of gymnastics move to ah, get themselves over the top.
[57:45] Mike: Yeah, makes me wonder if they're like what she's stimulating when she does that I mean first of all, of course I'd like to point out the um I think it's kind of important like how if if if you didn't know the gender of the person here except for the use of the word clit it sounds like a guy right? I mean like this notion of passing a point of no return the threshold.
[57:58] Keith: Um, yeah, yeah, her description of orgasm sounds like she's actually having what it would be agreed upon to be an orgasm.
[58:02] Mike: Etc which.
[58:10] Mike: Right? Which stories like this and there are many many many stories like this or lead me to be skeptical of stories that women tell that sound completely unlike the experience men have that aside though I mean yeah I wonder if um. I mean yeah, she's some muscle is getting clenched here. It could be her her anus but it's probably just some part of her clit is being stimulated keep in mind as the ladies of Tiktok like to remind everybody that the clit is actually a rather large organ that sits on the. Ah, can't remember now like on the pubic bone or whatever you seen it. There's a large internal surface or volume of the clitoris.
[58:43] Keith: Yeah, but I mean the penis is long too especially in my case and ah ah this this is a meme is as old as the podcast and I don't.
[58:48] Mike: Oh yeah.
[58:56] Mike: So just.
[59:00] Keith: I mean but yeah, like there's only a certain area of it. That's actually sensitive or maximally sensitive.
[59:04] Mike: Well, but for women sure I mean but the the G spot is a real thing I mean there's internal internal stimulation like that's why it feels good. That's why being penetrated feels good because there's ah there parts of the clip that run down along the internal part of the vagina there and so yeah.
[59:08] Keith: Um, yeah.
[59:16] Keith: Yeah, yeah I think thinkers can get at it better than the pians. But yeah.
[59:21] Mike: But it's believable to me that like kicking your legs or something like that could stimulate that. Yeah yeah.
[59:23] Keith: Oh I see what you're saying. Yeah she just has something like it's probably at least half psychological which I think is often the case for women so she'd thinks she has some trick that.
[59:37] Mike: It's the case for men too isn't there I mean are are there things that you have to do um like I you can go first I mean there are things oh'll come on. There isn't like some let's say that like it's.
[59:42] Keith: Um, yeah I need to stroke my cock.
[59:47] Mike: You know it's been a while say you're with a partner not doesn't really matter. It's been a while you want to get there is there something that you can like sort of do physically or mentally to get yourself over the finish line.
[59:56] Keith: Um.
[59:58] Mike: When I say it's been a while I mean you've been say beating off or having sex for a while not that? Yeah yeah.
[01:00:03] Keith: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're like all right. It's time to shit or get off the pot here. Um I don't know I don't I don't have like a collated list of things.
[01:00:12] Mike: Okay, so I definitely like I will imagine or I mean it's best if I have a porn that depicts this but like I will use you know nut and a comeshot parts of porn various you know, like so things that remind me of it or imagine in my head That's definitely a thing I do.
[01:00:24] Keith: Yeah.
[01:00:31] Mike: Um, let's see yeah like just sort of yeah I will try I Think that's what I do I try to bring to mind in as evocative a way. It's kind of that that that that sort of moment with a partner or in a porn. It's sort of the opposite of like the thinking about baseball thing which is to Delay Delay yourself like I'm trying to.
[01:00:46] Keith: Yeah.
[01:00:51] Mike: Things to mind now if I if I think to myself. Oh I got a nut I got a nut That's the worst thing I can do right? That's like because then you're stressing yourself out right.
[01:00:57] Keith: Yes, no I I totally relate to this I don't think I have like a classic standby thing that I think of it's probably I probably try to reference a recent porn I've seen or something I don't have.
[01:01:13] Mike: Her.
[01:01:15] Keith: Like a favorite or you know a greatest hits album in my mind that I that I go to.
[01:01:23] Mike: Yeah, it's hard because like there are certain ah porn elements that are particularly useful for me and it turns out they're like not the most common in Porn which is really funny like I think the most useful things for me are um, like missionary internal comshot. And that's not common in Porn amusingly or doggy like just like yeah but that's a cartoon cartoons aren't going to work as well For me Andai is a cartoon right? Yeah, okay, as.
[01:01:41] Keith: It isn't hentai.
[01:01:51] Keith: Um, yeah, but they often show these like anatomically correct. Well not correct, anatomically exaggerated diagrams of like the come Sometimes it's like entering the womb. It's preposterous.
[01:01:57] Mike: Jesus.
[01:02:05] Mike: Are you saying that I need to try this all right I'll take a note not not for that I mean I've looked I've looked at it to find things to like show to a coworker to upset them.
[01:02:08] Keith: I Mean you've really never looked at hentai.
[01:02:22] Mike: Ah, you know? Ah, ah you know some you have though not just not Hentai other sorts of ah yeah, ah yeah, it depends on the particular person. Ah, but ah anyway like I think that what I like.
[01:02:23] Keith: I've never been blessed by such a such a showing. No, that's true. Yeah I've been shown much much much porn by you? yeah.
[01:02:39] Mike: Or or ah internal oral come shots but again like the problem is that like 2 things 1 is that porn typically to tip depicts external come shots for whatever reason because they want to show the nut but actually like that turns me off in the moment because I don't want to see the guy spo.
[01:02:49] Keith: Ah.
[01:02:51] Keith: Yeah, right.
[01:02:55] Mike: Or they'll have him spew in the guy a nut in the woman's mouth and then dribble it out which I hate. Um, yeah I don't like that at all. Ah and let's see or she'll be riding him and I generally that's not my favorite I prefer the guy to be more dominant during the like if I'm if I'm working for the nut there.
[01:02:58] Keith: Yeah I don't like the little gargling party.
[01:03:12] Keith: Yep, heyp.
[01:03:14] Mike: So that's not great. So yeah, it's sort of it's sort of weird. It's like it's like I feel like there's a space in the market for like just more normal come shot porn but whatever it's where we're at as a society.
[01:03:23] Keith: Yeah, yeah, life's rough all right? That'll do it for episode 84 yeah, 84 of your mileage may vary. We can be contacted at Ymmv Pod on Twitter or by email at ymmvpod@gmail.compay$10 for feedback and always enjoy hearing from you so hit us up. Also if you have any questions for the show you can send them to either of those 2 places and yeah, we'll put it on the show with it.
[01:03:51] Mike: Well, we'll pay Twenty Twenty dollars $20 for threesome partners for Keith yeah.
[01:03:57] Keith: People might want might not want to do like explicit prostitution I think it becomes that if if there we go there. We go thanks to Mike first time thanks to you for your decision to listen and we hope you'll join us next week on your mileage may very.
[01:04:02] Mike: Okay, they can pay us $20

YMMVYour Mileage May Vary

Episode 84: Pegging Interrupted, Sugar Daddies, Masturbation Hacks, Hall Passes

Episode Transcript