Enjoy YMMV? Please click the above button to subscribe to the show!
Give us your email for show notes and reminders:  
To participate or give feedback, email us at ymmvpod@gmail.com.

Episode 92: Too Much Nudity?, Is Pegging Gay?, Messy Blowjobs, FWB Demands

Team YMMV | 11-17-2022 | 1:04:04

Read The Transcript

      RSS             S      

A man accused us of not understanding how someone can be completely, totally straight and yet still enjoy being on the receiving end of a good pegging. Now, on some level that may occasionally be true, but it makes sense to me that it pushes you a bit "to the left" on the spectrum. And, it could even be a gateway drug, moving you from MFM land to the world of MMF. But maybe that's just the gabapentin talking.

Next, what would you do if a couple barged into your room and started having sex right in front of you? Would you watch? Participate? Sneak off to the bathroom to masturbate?

One woman enjoys showing up to her boyfriend's apartment completely nude and unannounced. Another wants to know if men are bothered by her looking "a mess" while giving blowjobs. And yet another woman has a list of very specific demands to initiate and FWB situation with an ex.

We get a lot of our questions from Reddit, so for our listeners' enjoyment, here are links to some of the questions we discussed this week:

https://ymmv.me/92/voyeur

https://ymmv.me/92/mess

https://ymmv.me/92/risky

https://ymmv.me/92/ex-list

Episode Transcript

Transcript automatically generated by a robot. Apologies for any inaccuracies.

  • [00:00] Keith: Hello and welcome to your mileage may vary. We talk about sex and relationships with frankness that is controversial but mostly in good faith on today's show we're going to tackle drunken roommate sex watching messy blowjobs, excessive public nudity and more I am Keith my co-host is Mike how's it going mike.
  • [00:15] Mike: Great I'm curious about how much public nudity you need to have it be excessive. Yeah.
  • [00:21] Keith: Yeah, we'll get there but should we talk about this person who's been hate mailing us. Ah I actually didn't realize it was the same person I thought we were just experiencing a wave of.
  • [00:26] Mike: Sure.
  • [00:35] Mike: Ah, yeah.
  • [00:38] Keith: Of people who are upset. But yeah you pointed out that it it was the same person. So ah yeah I mean the the general complaint is that we're not woke or sex positive enough does that sound right.
  • [00:54] Mike: Well, the first ah and let's be I mean I think we have to for this to be useful. We have to reveal that it is um, it does appear to be a a male person but but we did say we would not dox this person anyway, we will keep our word on that. Um, but ah, he.
  • [01:00] Keith: Moving.
  • [01:10] Mike: He seems to be somebody who enjoys receiving pegging and was irritated by our um, our skepticism about how great that would be or that most men and really we were questioning like the masculinity ah a bit of guys who would receive pegging and I actually think that's like a pretty. First of all I think the percentage of men who enjoy receiving pegging is quite low I don't have data on that but I feel confident that it's under 10 percent and maybe under 1% and I think I mean yeah, good ahead. Okay, fair fair I guess I when I said enjoy I meant in the sense of.
  • [01:40] Keith: Um, well but I mean what percentage of people have tried.
  • [01:48] Mike: Enjoy meaning a you know enjoying a beverage. It's like a thing they they do very low prison.
  • [01:51] Keith: I know but the probabilities here are weird because yet if you filter only people who have tried it. It might be that most men like it I don't know.
  • [02:01] Mike: Right? I'm just saying that I was using the word Enjoy is like a synonym for do yeah but but sure you're you're saying that like there there could be this untapped I think there probably is this untapped pool of men who could potentially enjoy it that in the sense in the just in the sense of that they would like it. Do don't want to for various.
  • [02:06] Keith: Okay, fine, fine, fine, fine.
  • [02:21] Keith: Yeah.
  • [02:21] Mike: Physical or social reasons. Um, but yeah, this person and I think I mean look I mean each person's entitled their opinion. But I mean where I think I think we're with the vast vast majority of men in saying that most men view that activity as a little taboo not really something. They're super into. And something that if they found out I mean this is why men don't typically tell other men hey I like getting pegged I mean have you ever had somebody in real life tell you that they enjoy being pegged right? And that's why so we're just reflecting that I mean we're you know I mean I don't know if we're.
  • [02:51] Keith: Ah, no, no.
  • [02:58] Mike: Yeah, and and and we're also reflecting our statement that we haven't now and I actually said on maybe 4 or 5 episodes ago I pointed out that it's true that even if 1 or both of us. Had been pegged or enjoyed it. We might not reveal it to each other because it's pretty taboo and so I think it's sort of interesting to see what the level of taboo around this is yeah sure.
  • [03:10] Keith: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, all right I'm going to read this guy's email just because just because I think we should all right? This person says what a disappointing podcast full of old stereotypes. It's time to realize that where someone finds pleasure has absolutely nothing to do with his sexual orientation. Oh. I didn't know that in addition, if somebody wants to be a temporary sub so be it does someone who wants to have a moment in a receiving place during a sex act mean their entire masculine perception go out the window. What about role-playing it's time for people like you guys to loosen your rigid identity classifications. It was. This writing here is not great. So I'm going to try and fix it. It was as if I listened to 2 men stuck in the 1980 s 191980 s to 1990 s discussing how a man is not masculine after being pegged a prostate is like a clitoris. It has a ton of pleasure prostate. It's not like a clitoris. But.
  • [04:03] Mike: Hurry.
  • [04:09] Mike: No, it's not.
  • [04:11] Keith: And do I I'll go on here if certain men like you are stuck behind old societal pressures and stereotypes. It's time to move into 2022 I'm a strong man physically and mentally athletic boxing past a former military leader I don't think this stuff doxes him.
  • [04:26] Mike: No no, it doesn't.
  • [04:28] Keith: And a great husband father and overall man we can discuss it later and cut this if we think it does your female host. Didn't agree with your opinions either sincerely X um.
  • [04:38] Mike: Yeah I mean I think that the um first of all I just have to disagree on like objective grounds here I Do think that these sexual activities you're involved in do have a bearing on your sexual orientation. I mean you can argue that sexual orientation is a pass a notion and people should just be. Treated completely as individuals and I think there are people who take that position but I mean how do you define sexual orientation if it's not based on the activities. The person engages in.
  • [05:07] Keith: Um, sure I mean the obvious thing to say here is you can receive anal from a woman.
  • [05:15] Mike: Sure But that would change I mean yeah, well the other thing would be. You know how many sexual orientations are there gay straight. But there's a lot in between and I think we would both acknowledge that and look I mean I think a person who receives anal is pegged by a woman is slightly. Different in terms of orientation or maybe significantly different than a man who does not choose to participate in that activity and I think for obvious reasons it doesn't mean they're gay Well well they're engaging in a sex activity. That's the receptive partner. Um.
  • [05:42] Keith: Go on what are those.
  • [05:54] Mike: And essentially an activity that is mostly something that would happen between 2 men and certainly prior to the invention of modern plastics and rubber devices. It would have not been possible in in that environment just like I would say and I've seen.
  • [06:04] Keith: Plastic.
  • [06:13] Mike: Porn videos like this where a woman wears a strap on and a man gives it an Aal and I've seen a man give oral to a strapon in a way that just suggests that he wants to do that to a penis or that like there's some sort of imagination there and I'm I'm not saying that makes him gay I'm not even saying it makes him buy but I am saying it moves him on that spectrum and I think.
  • [06:25] Keith: Um, yeah.
  • [06:32] Mike: And and and the other thing is so like I'm actually not even saying there's anything wrong with that. So the message of this emails a little confusing. Yeah yeah.
  • [06:40] Keith: I think well. Okay, first off I think that many people would argue I think most 6 positive people would argue that enjoying receiving anal play correlates zero with your. Ah, with the sex of your partner preference.
  • [07:03] Mike: I Think that's I Just don't agree with that I mean I can say well I can say it for I can I don't agree it from my own with it from my own introspection into my own brain for me. They're they're related in the in the following sense. The.
  • [07:08] Keith: Um, I know I I hear you I do I I'm I'm just calcifying this or clarifying this.
  • [07:22] Mike: Pretty much the only thing that I find compelling about receptive anal sex as a man is the notion that my partner would receive pleasure from it and so it's pretty obvious to me that like that's the direction you're moving. It's it so that so there is a connection between that you know those 2 things.
  • [07:35] Keith: Well, but yeah, but I mean I think it would be extremely hard to argue that enjoying receiving anal sex is not submissive I think it is extremely submissive but it's 1 of the more.
  • [07:49] Mike: Sure.
  • [07:54] Keith: Generic Submissive things you can do whilst having sex.
  • [07:55] Mike: But I mean but you can look you can you can you can walk down the road here I mean first yes, you'll have somebody who just is always just like my prostate simulated okay, fine then and I believe me there's substantial amount of content on this throughout the internets and I believe it's real content posted by real people. Where people say hey. Ah my girlfriend is using a strap on on me and I want her to receive pleasure from that as well. You know they want a vibrator at the base of it or something so that she's receiving pleasure and and and that's actually quite complicated and not really easy to do. They do have a device that.
  • [08:26] Keith: Um, yeah.
  • [08:31] Mike: Kind of has a bulb that goes in a vagina etc etc. So like there are people who tried to solve this problem. Well, that's another step down the thing down the path and it's pretty obvious to me that like what you're doing is you're moving toward a person with just that appendage and oh and by the way there's also people that are into transsexual stuff.
  • [08:34] Keith: Um, yeah.
  • [08:47] Keith: Church right.
  • [08:49] Mike: Where then they're actually receiving it from a penis but they're saying oh this is a woman because it's somebody who identifies as a woman I don't want to get into that argument but you see there's steps along the way and then the final step is well. It's just a man and there's nothing wrong with that. But I think it's clear that there's some sort of continuum that you're walking down once you begin to participate in receptive anal play and it's not. Strictly, it's not I think it's tricky and and also it's confusing to me why somebody saying this would care so much about being saying hey I'm heterosexual I'm completely heterosexual like who cares.
  • [09:17] Keith: Yeah I mean ah, it's a little bit like I think the lady doth protest too much like it's suspicious to be so outraged by this I did look I can imagine a person who is you know, very heterosexual. And who enjoys anal play. Um, so I think that person exists I think it's possible I just suspect that. Ah, there's at least some correlation between. Enjoying receiving anal play and not being completely heterosexual.
  • [09:56] Mike: Sure I Just think that that I think that definition of heterosexual of hetero and homosexual is too narrow I think that such a person. The reality is the person has moved a little bit on the spectrum which is not to say they've moved across.
  • [10:03] Keith: You sure.
  • [10:10] Keith: Yeah I mean the spectrum. The spectrum is multidimensional right? So on 1 line you have heterosexual homosexual on another axis you have submissive dominant and then there's you know 37 other axes in multidimensional space like it's I agree.
  • [10:12] Mike: You know 90% the other way but they've moved a little bit.
  • [10:24] Mike: Sure but they correlate they correlate right? So yeah.
  • [10:30] Keith: I agree but look this this suddenly got into like a somewhat complicated mathematical proof here but it they're not causal and or at least.
  • [10:46] Mike: You're saying that. Ah, if I if I discovered that I enjoyed prostate stimulation. Ah that wouldn't cause me to become more likely to move toward the homosexual see I think it would actually because then I think I would start I think I would start fantasy I mean this is the thing.
  • [10:57] Keith: Yeah I think you're right.
  • [11:02] Mike: I think I would start fantasizing about okay well now I know that there's this spot inside my anus or Rectum or whatever that feels pretty good. Okay, but it's a plastic thing and it's a girl. She's getting no pleasure and so like I said I know like I actually introspecting know that I would find it more compelling if she if she got pleasure from it. Well you know we'd really get pleasure from it.
  • [11:08] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
  • [11:18] Keith: Right.
  • [11:21] Mike: A guy and I can't even see the person and I'm not really attracted to guys. But I just could see it moving that direction. So I don't know.
  • [11:29] Keith: I agree I think we're we're basically agreeing here. Ah speaking of protesting too much. Should we read? the other thing he okay this one was a pretty vicious attack on me but ah of.
  • [11:30] Mike: Yeah.
  • [11:39] Mike: Sure.
  • [11:46] Keith: I'll read it I um man enough. Ah yeah, you would hard after me says I find it so hard to believe that one of you guys has an Ivy League education. Ouch he has this mannerism about himself where he thinks he's really headed shoulders above everyone else. Big deal. You visited many countries and run marathons.
  • [11:46] Mike: That's right, he spared me a little bit which I was grateful for.
  • [12:06] Keith: Your ego town pal I have news for you, you aren't at all. Ah I think you might say you aren't at all I have an Mba do quite well in life myself I married and listen for fun. But when you sit there and have a conversation saying I wonder if it's more fun to have sex with a big breasted woman. You sound like such an idiot like your dumb frat boy.
  • [12:11] Mike: And.
  • [12:25] Keith: Don't forget Ted Cruz also has an ivy league education. Are you that much of a butt fuck.
  • [12:30] Mike: Right? right? And then there was the the discussion of whether of of it. The irony of a person ah complaining about someone else talking being like a frat boy and then using and calling them a butt fuck and the the double irony of like.
  • [12:40] Keith: Right.
  • [12:45] Mike: I mean I think this is the same person like this is somebody who enjoy who says he enjoys receiving anal sex. So I guess he is actually and I'm not even being derogatory at all here. He actually is a butt fuck right? or a butt fucky right? Yeah, um.
  • [12:47] Keith: Right? right.
  • [12:57] Keith: Yes, that is a ah and an accurate description.
  • [13:04] Mike: But yeah I mean i' yes, it's a little bit confusing but I don't think I think we try to be sensitive to the complexities of these topics but him don't agree.
  • [13:13] Keith: Yeah I mean I'm not sure if maybe 1 episode he listened to we didn't set up our opinions and we just sort of rushed through something and he didn't understand or if he's just being obtuse on purpose I don't know.
  • [13:24] Mike: Yeah, and I mean on the large breasted a large breasted woman thing I mean I'm sorry like I do think that and I actually as I think we discussed last week I don't have like a really really super strong preference here. But I do think that if you if I had sex with the same person but you just enlarged her breasts. Actually I know this because breast size changes over a woman's life and yeah, my like increases like the quality of my orgasm like I know this So just at least for me, it's actually true like I'm sorry.
  • [13:57] Keith: Yeah I mean Ah, apparently it's now controversial to say that people have breast size preference. Anyway, let's move on.
  • [14:01] Mike: Well, but it's very direct and it makes sense to me I mean the more feminine the person for a hetero male I mean the more yeah the more your brain's going to reward you your brain says. Wow You really found a feminine person to impregnate. Okay, yeah, yeah.
  • [14:15] Keith: Yeah, we don't need to litigate this. We. We agree everyone agrees um, okay, there are I have a number of things here I'm not sure if I should start with one of the things that I promised in the intro I think I probably should. Ah. Okay, this person says ah last night my roommate entered my room naked and erect begging me for a condom the girl he brought home followed him into my room. She was naked to boasted that both of them were drunk. What happened next is yup.
  • [14:47] Mike: Wait Can you stop? So I want to guess whether op here is a male or a female because it's not clear yet. Yeah I I think it's a guy So I think it's a guy whose male roommate came in with his dick erect and asked for a condom.
  • [14:52] Keith: Oh yeah, sorry it says in the end the thing but I didn't read it.
  • [15:04] Keith: You got it. You got it? Yeah and the girl he brought home followed him in what happened next is the reason I'm posting I was in bed and my roommate stormed into my room. He was naked erect and drunk as frock. He wasted no time explaining that his condom broke and asked if I could provide him with one of my own I checked my wallet. No condom.
  • [15:06] Mike: So right? Okay, go on. Yeah. Okay.
  • [15:22] Keith: That moment a naked girl walked into my room. She was my roommate's hookup. It was my first time seeing her in person. She laughed at my roommate who for some reason decided to check under my bed for condoms I could tell she was Struk too because all the words coming out of her mouth were lagging for days I had no idea what she was trying to communicate but eventually she also went down on all fours and teamed up with my roommate to search for missing condoms under my bed.
  • [15:22] Mike: Who.
  • [15:42] Keith: Unable to find any condoms. The girl proceeded to go down on my roommate on my bedroom floor I was still in bed awkwardly trying not to stir at the 2 of them being unashamedly sexual in front of me I've never had sex and that was my first exposure to what real people look like when they're intimate I got hard. It was an unexpected turn turn on seeing my roommate come in the girl's mouth and watching her lick him clean.
  • [15:57] Mike: Ah, okay, this isn't real.
  • [16:02] Keith: That sentence I know I I knew you were going to say that that sentence I immediately thought this isn't real. Ah and I actually got ah some feedback from a listener this week who said that they don't like it when we say that things aren't real. Yeah.
  • [16:06] Mike: He.
  • [16:15] Mike: Sorry I mean I can be more specific. The problem is that it shifted in tone from very kind of a reporter reporting the facts over to porn right? That was the problem. You know it's in yeah, the person's obviously aroused and getting excited by that description. It's like in in my in his warm come.
  • [16:23] Keith: Right? right? right? right? Yeah yeah, right? that? Yeah, it's just tonally not not consistent. Anyway, he says.
  • [16:35] Mike: Sticky comes slid down her throat. Okay, yeah. Rain.
  • [16:42] Keith: This might sound dumb but I never knew girls actually do that outside of porn I awkwardly excused myself and went to the bathroom where I masturbated I decided to sleep on the couch when I was done in the bathroom because a post not clarity and b I didn't know what to expect by return to my room. The couch seems safer at the time l lo well all right 1 more paragraph.
  • [16:54] Mike: Yeah.
  • [16:58] Keith: This morning my roommate apologized for what happened. So did the girl Both of them were really embarrassed without thinking I said it was okay because because it turned out to be much better than watching porn my roommate and the girl laughed but I instantly regretted being that honest I'm not going to lie though I wouldn't mind watching them again.
  • [17:13] Mike: Sure.
  • [17:15] Keith: You think it would be inappropriate to ask my roommate if he would allow me to be an audience member in a sex life I'm kind of slow burn when it comes to dating So I don't think I'm going to be having sex anytime soon now that I've seen the real thing porn kind of seems less appealing I don't know what's going on with me and I don't really know what advice I need but I need something.
  • [17:31] Mike: And I mean this sounds I mean if this was true if this is true, sounds like a pretty hot scenario I think I too would I mean the only thing the thing that would worry me in this situation is being sort of assaulted by the other guy you know like just.
  • [17:50] Keith: Short.
  • [17:50] Mike: Yeah, you just never know I mean it's another man I don't necessarily want them watching me beating off he went to the bathroom to solve that obviously be better if you had some other way to obscure yourself. Um, but yeah I mean this reminds me and look I find it like perfectly arousing to watch like cam couple.
  • [17:59] Keith: Yeah.
  • [18:08] Mike: On Chatterbait and the guy nuts. It's great.
  • [18:11] Keith: There's something about it being explicitly voyeuristic versus all parties knowing that makes it not intriguing to me.
  • [18:20] Mike: That's interesting see wait a minute explicitly voyeuristic versus all parties knowing explain that more.
  • [18:26] Keith: Yeah, maybe I misspoke what I mean is I don't want people to be be to be performing sex for me or or yeah, maybe it's not even performing. Performing is okay.
  • [18:36] Mike: So you don't like cam shows or porn. Okay.
  • [18:44] Keith: It's The. Ah, yeah I Guess I Just don't want people watching me masturbate.
  • [18:49] Mike: Yeah I mean for me like my right I don't want my physicality present in the room but like the notion that I could see them more clearly as long as I know look if the girl wanted to come over and blow me. That's great. But if but I don't want to interact with the guy. It's It's all about the guy right? and and actually let me.
  • [18:58] Keith: Um, yeah, yeah.
  • [19:08] Mike: Permute the situation here if it were 2 women cavorting unless one of them was like large enough to like hurt me I think I would be totally fine with this in fact, okay, she could hurt me emotionally too by like making fun of me beating off that would suck but as long as I knew that wasn't going to happen and I've always thought I think I've said this on the podcast like i've. Always been jealous of the scenarios tiger woods purportedly would cook up where he would just like sit on a chair in a room beating off and there'd be just people cavorting I think typically multiple women that sounds pretty awesome like I mean would would that bother. You.
  • [19:29] Keith: Right.
  • [19:43] Keith: Um, ah yeah, a bit I mean I agree that the notion of just having infinite money and being able to set up effectively. A holock experience sounds pretty compelling. But.
  • [19:44] Mike: Yeah, like.
  • [19:53] Mike: Yeah, so yeah.
  • [20:00] Keith: I mean I know when they leave they're going to. They're going to discuss like the nice thing about a holiday is you can shut it down.
  • [20:03] Mike: Oh interesting. So you're worried so wow. So if if ah if it was some sort of combat so for okay, a couple things 1 is switching the man to a woman didn't really help then like or it changed it somehow it made it but it's still bad for you. Making it such 2 women instead of a man and a woman.
  • [20:22] Keith: Ah, ah yeah I have a but I prefer there not to be a man involved and like I agree with your intuition that like yeah, just the physicality and aggressiveness of the man is undesirable.
  • [20:27] Mike: Okay, and so but so then if.
  • [20:37] Mike: Rights. But so okay, so we switched it to a woman which helps some so let's say we switch it to um this is would be an unusual thing but it's Keith's beat off room slash death row. So this is going to happen and then the 2 women will be executed then you'd be Jill with it.
  • [20:52] Keith: Sure I was going to suggest they need to be sufficiently drunk I like that a little better right? right.
  • [20:56] Mike: Okay, yeah, they get right? They could just be drug drugged in such a way that they'll be amnesia Sure So You're not actually killing someone. Okay, so then then yes, that's interesting I don't think I would and you're worried about what that they would like be like why does he have that paper towel spread out on the desk. To beat off likewise.
  • [21:13] Keith: I don't know. Yeah, we discussed this with ah Eric way back when this discussion about shame around masturbating and you seem to have none and I think Eric and I agreed that we both.
  • [21:24] Mike: Well I don't want to be caught doing it in public.
  • [21:30] Keith: Yeah I Just always have this sort of embarrassed feeling after I nut when I'm masturbating and I think that would be amplified by somebody being sort of compensated to be there to assist.
  • [21:36] Mike: Ah, well like.
  • [21:45] Mike: I wonder if I should try a situationally and it probably be actually quite easy to set up. But and yeah I mean you just have 2 women cavort in front of you but the ah ah I think that if.
  • [21:51] Keith: Right.
  • [21:59] Mike: Yeah I think that after let's say they were still I mean if you hired people to do this. They would be convverting. This is pretty far from this guy's question. But if you were hired people to be kind of cavorting. They'd be. They wouldn't be doing it for real so they just continue doing it until you nodded I'd probably want to leave quickly after the ejaculation event.
  • [22:16] Keith: You don't want to do a ah Sports Center replay of of the top moments.
  • [22:17] Mike: Well, they would I would just know that they were hired hired talent. So just dismiss them.
  • [22:25] Keith: Um, are people are people allowed to masturbate in strip clubs.
  • [22:31] Mike: I'm not sure are they allowed to That's a great question I mean so like you're asking if it's a crime.
  • [22:34] Keith: Um I think generally no surely some places let you? Oh yeah, maybe it's actually a crime I'm not sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
  • [22:42] Mike: Let you is sort of complicated right? I mean they like I I was reading something about yeah as I do sometimes the yeah how it works in the champagne room. Yeah, everybody knows of course that there's no sex in the champagne room except there is.
  • [22:56] Keith: Um, right? Yeah I'm sure that if your wallet is deep enough.
  • [22:59] Mike: Ah, depending on the the location apparently in Las Vegas like it there always is um, it doesn't I mean my thought would be it doesn't have to be that deep I mean I I think that the typical going rate for a sex act is say 2 to $500
  • [23:18] Keith: Um, and it might be lower at it at a strip club.
  • [23:19] Mike: And I don't you know that's I mean any think about it I think it might be I mean just going to get a lap dance I think is often 2020 or more dollars. Yeah, okay, yeah, so I mean you just have to be willing to pay a bit more than a couple of lap dances. yeah yeah I mean I guess.
  • [23:26] Keith: It varies. But that's the right order of magnitude.
  • [23:38] Mike: My rule of thumb would be if somebody goes in there and gets say they 4 or 5 songs. They're an idiot if they're not getting gratified because in terms of whether it's legal or not I mean or what look I mean people do it for sure and also you have those adult bookstores with I mean their glory holes. So I've seen lots of I mean the videos are all staged.
  • [23:42] Keith: Yeah.
  • [23:47] Keith: Um, right.
  • [23:56] Mike: Although maybe not all of them are staged I don't know um, but with a glory hold. So there's definitely so and and think about like in a bathhouse and a gay bathhouse like those people are definitely just beating off in public or so must be legal.
  • [24:08] Keith: Yeah I Yeah I don't I suspect that if you were doing it in some sort of aggressive way that you could get arrested.
  • [24:11] Mike: As long as there're no children or something.
  • [24:24] Keith: But they would have to complain which seems unlikely.
  • [24:25] Mike: Like my impression is that at sex clubs. It's pretty common to have voyeur stuff where some beat guys beat off and also at adult movie theaters. Although that was what Pwee Herman got arrested for and that was I guess illegal. So I don't know.
  • [24:33] Keith: Yeah, right? Yeah I don't know if adult movie theaters exists anymore. But man that sounds disgusting like the floor in there my word. Yeah, all right? Let's move on.
  • [24:42] Mike: True sure. Yeah, we you wouldn't want to be the cleaner. It's disgusting for sure. Yeah.
  • [24:53] Keith: Ah, this person says looking like a mess while giving him a blowjob I a 20 year old female was hooking up with this guy I've been seeing so I was going down on him and I kind of wasn't really caring about how I looked because I was so into it. So My hair was a mess I was drooling and I think my eyes were watery because of the gag Reflex. Making all kinds of slobbery noises and during it I did not care but afterwards I felt embarrassed like I probably looked crazy and now I feel stupid I can't help it care. How I looked any advice. Everybody said the same thing which is basically sounds hot as fuck.
  • [25:26] Mike: I Don't think that's quite right I think that I think that this this reminds me of like the issue with ah you know, ah you have a woman in the doggy style position and you withdraw your penis and like some some noises are made you would of course be nice about it.
  • [25:42] Keith: And.
  • [25:43] Mike: But it's not a great thing you like the I think the ideal male experience in a blow would actually be that like her everything stays perfect about her face throughout the entire act.
  • [25:53] Keith: Well okay, counterpoint. You've seen the pictures where you know a girl's like makeup is all running down her face and you know there's a map of Hawaii you know, sprayed on her face as well. Like.
  • [26:02] Mike: Sure.
  • [26:09] Mike: Oh from the seamen. Yeah yes.
  • [26:13] Keith: Right? Yeah, this is like a common ah porn trope. So some people seem to like that. It's like a it's like a dominance play.
  • [26:16] Mike: I think well that yeah I think that yeah I mean there's a couple things there one is that I you'd have to wonder what percentage of guys like that. But even like let's assume it was a high percentage I would still think there. There's there are 2 levels of this There's the one with say mascara running okay, but that's still that doesn't have to be sort of a complete mess that can be on 1 level then there's the level where the woman is just like frothing at the mouth and stuff like that and that one I do feel like is a smaller niche I think that men generally want the woman to look.
  • [26:49] Keith: Organic.
  • [26:53] Mike: Sort of put together through it. It turns them on more because I think part of the male fantasy is kind of deflowering this beautiful thing.
  • [27:01] Keith: Yeah I don't know I mean there was Megan the styion. Do you know that is she's a rapper. She.
  • [27:09] Mike: What if you say I thought it was a rapper I didn't want to get that wrong. Okay I know I think those spelled T H A well. Okay.
  • [27:20] Keith: T H E E I Believe yeah I double check. But ah yeah, she once said, you know her head is weak if she ain't fucking up her makeup. So I don't know Anyway, there's a trope out there.
  • [27:26] Mike: Who.
  • [27:32] Mike: Yeah, okay.
  • [27:39] Keith: I Don't love blow chops generally and so I don't have a strong opinion on this I think Ah yeah I.
  • [27:48] Mike: It I mean this you see these both can be true in in the sense that what Megan the stallion is saying I think is if I can interpret her words is that women need to show like a lot of effort. Exactly.
  • [28:03] Keith: Enthusiasm. Yeah.
  • [28:07] Mike: Um, but right? so so she's saying high enthusiasm is good and I agree with that. But by the same token like I don't think that when when people say in a reassuring way on Reddit or wherever oh don't worry, you know he's.
  • [28:24] Mike: The guys don't care about this stuff in that situation. They do a little right I mean it. It matters some? yeah.
  • [28:30] Keith: Yeah, that's right, yeah like if you if you quive it's fine, but that's right, That's right, It's the same as a fart like it's like all right? you know look you're human. But yeah, all right? ah.
  • [28:33] Mike: We It would have been better if you did it hadn't right? That's right, It wasn't like a positive. Right? exactly.
  • [28:48] Keith: Um, not even going to bother reading this one but it came across the list and we've been through this Abelia dives. It's just sort of funny. It's secure after threesome with my girlfriend and another guy that's that's just the same.
  • [28:58] Mike: Isn't this this person made a point of saying it was an M fm threesome right? So that's good I mean it's good that they got the Termin I've got they got it straight what they're trying to say there. What's the insecurity around the other guy at Bigger Cock or.
  • [29:00] Keith: Yes.
  • [29:11] Keith: Ah, so so so that's what we did and everything was going fine until the actual session when I saw her orgasm from PiVSex with my friend. She pretty much never orgasm from pi iv sex with me only from oral or using a vibrator.
  • [29:14] Mike: Oh God Oh that would so that would really upset you right? Yeah, interesting to what what about if you just knew.
  • [29:25] Keith: Yes, it would.
  • [29:33] Mike: The woman you were dating had had really good orgasms from another guy's cock and she told you about it that would bother you to let's say better.
  • [29:38] Keith: I Guess I mean if if I was in a long term relationship and I was not able to to the extent. It's possible reliably deliver orgasms to my partner that would be bad and and if that were the case I would.
  • [29:50] Mike: Who.
  • [29:56] Keith: Be even more hesitant to get involved in it threesome because you just don't want to pour gasoline on that insecure fire.
  • [30:02] Mike: I see okay, but yeah, there's this fear. It's an interesting because there is like the other side of this which is the ah so so a couple things one is that the really really basic. Failure mode here is the mmf threesome where the woman sees not to bring up Mr X who criticized us from beginning the episode again. But a woman you know if she sees you having sex with the other guy in some way and then is turned off by that. That's like that's a really common one here. It's the.
  • [30:26] Keith: Right.
  • [30:37] Mike: The guy didn't want to oh so yeah, the point I wanted to make is that there is the there is a fetish that goes exactly the other direction right? which is the hot wife or Cuck fetish where people actually want apparently to see their wife right.
  • [30:46] Keith: Oh yeah, the cock cold porn. Yeah yeah, bull they call it a bull The bull comes in and ah the and delivers an orgasm.
  • [30:57] Mike: So that so is does that mean that that must mean that or it suggests that this is just sort of a high beta situation beta in the stock market sense right? It's it's going to. It's going to provoke a strong reaction and different men will have a different reaction 1 way or the other and I think.
  • [31:06] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
  • [31:15] Mike: I Think my reaction would be like yours. It would be negative.
  • [31:19] Keith: Um, up Well I mean just generally if you agree to a M Fm threesome. What like as a man I would never want to do that I might do it if on the other end was a f fm threesome.
  • [31:34] Mike: Okay, yeah I got it right.
  • [31:36] Keith: Or Fmf um, but I think even still yeah I wouldn't sign up for that contract. But yeah I mean that presumably you're hoping that the the girl is hoping to have a good time and so. I'm not even sure what a reasonable expectation of it might be if not for her to have an orgasm.
  • [31:59] Mike: Well I mean I think it would be 1 thing I think my experience would be different if the other man gave her oral versus if he gave her a PiV orgasm that second one the way I mean in this specific situation. This guy's describing is. Probably the worst because yeah, it's basically implying that there's something about this guy's anatomy but did something special and and then it.
  • [32:18] Keith: Yeah.
  • [32:24] Keith: Right? right? It's not his technique. Yeah.
  • [32:34] Mike: Yeah, that would be sort of upsetting or I mean actually in and I think the real thing is you'd have this suspicion that she liked him more just like generally and so then you would become insecure. Yeah.
  • [32:44] Keith: Yeah I mean I've talked in the past about how you know men's brains can be pretty stupid. They'll choose a nine point one over a nine point zero in terms of attractiveness even if the 9.1 is just an absolutely terrible person.
  • [33:00] Mike: So I get the market.
  • [33:03] Keith: And so I think it's hard for men to imagine a scenario where a woman encounters a man that is able to deliver her superior sexual pleasure and not have her mind constantly be polluted with this like what if question.
  • [33:17] Mike: Well keep in mind that those are 2 different things right? I mean the the man it would just be the attractiveness of the woman and I agree completely that guys are sort of irrational about that. But with the woman it's so I mean this is the thing is that it's it's very hard and actually I think I think it's rational for a person to.
  • [33:21] Keith: They are.
  • [33:36] Mike: Interpret the orgasm that another person has as some kind of revelation about their subconscious or unconscious mind. So I think that's what I mean and so I think women I mean I've definitely encountered women having the same trepidation.
  • [33:45] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
  • [33:54] Mike: And there I know that in MFF threesomes it's common for the woman to be pretty careful about where he puts his semen and not just because of pregnancy. It's because she's yeah, she's nervous that like she doesn't want to see him brought to that climax with another woman.
  • [34:03] Keith: Yeah, there's feelings.
  • [34:13] Mike: Which is of course exactly what he wants So it's rough. Yeah.
  • [34:17] Keith: Um, yeah I mean if the whole thing is look if you could be completely jealousy free then threesomes might be compelling but I don't know.
  • [34:28] Mike: Yeah, yeah, would be hard to it to be hard to watch watch your woman orgasming with some guy riding or and be rough but you probably it's somewhat likely would because it's a new partner for her right.
  • [34:31] Keith: Through artic.
  • [34:36] Keith: Right? Especially if the orgasm seems superior to anything you can do yeah because it's a new partner right? Yeah like it's almost certainly going to be better for the guy and yeah, all right Anyway, let's get onto this nudity thing.
  • [34:48] Mike: That's rough. Yeah, yeah.
  • [34:55] Keith: Ah, this person says last night. My girlfriend did something very risky. My girlfriend 19 enjoys being sexual in public I twenty have no problem behaving sexually outdoors as long as we avoid drawing attention or getting caught a few nights ago. My girlfriend and I went to the store to get condoms. She was wearing my hoodie. It was too big for her so it kind of looked like a dress.
  • [34:59] Mike: Microphone Nineteen August twenty
  • [35:15] Keith: Nothing unusual about that not until she flashed me in the store and I realized she was completely naked underneath not going to lie. It was hot as fuck and had instantly turned me on but at the same time I was also really nervous because there were a few other customers and not to mention cameras. My girlfriend said the cameras didn't bother her and encouraged me to touch her when none of the customers were paying attention. Stuck my hands under the hoodie once or twice and touched her butt. She loved it and so did I I didn't expect her to level up from that but she did last night she showed up at my place wearing nothing at all. She decided to drive naked get out of the car naked and walk up 2 flights of stairs naked until she finally knocked on my door still naked. She did warn me beforehand but I didn't think she would actually do it when I opened the door and saw her with nothing on I wanted to fuck her right there but my first reaction was to get her inside and make sure no one saw her thankfully it was quite late and it seems like not many people if it any at all were outside at that time. My girlfriend and I had sex before we discussed her palsy moved to show up in my place like that. I said I thought it was hot but very fucking risky not just in terms of getting seen but also ending up in an unsafe situation. My comfort said she made sure the coast is clear before she did what she did and I should count my ask lucky that I'm with someone who's willing to take risks in the name of hot sex question. But girlfriend going too far with it with her exhibitionism or am I being too protective.
  • [36:30] Mike: Well this sounds like the beginning before the dun done of a law and order s V Episode S V you being you know the it's going to be rape and so forth. Yeah I mean this is I mean.
  • [36:41] Keith: Special victims unit the rape one? yep.
  • [36:49] Mike: Part of the ah rules around women's clothing have to do with just safety because there are men that would just get the wrong idea. Well I mean what is yeah I mean the first question would be what is the right idea here like what's why is she doing that. Um.
  • [37:06] Keith: They're right.
  • [37:08] Mike: Yeah I mean if she's such an attractive hell bushy nineteen. Yeah I mean.
  • [37:10] Keith: Um, yeah I mean she's either going to get assaulted or put on a registered sex offender list. Those are the 2 possible outcomes here.
  • [37:21] Mike: Yeah, and she's saying it was better because it was late at night like that doesn't seem like a reasonable set of behaviors I think I would be if I were him I'd be worried about her mental health.
  • [37:25] Keith: Yeah mean you can't.
  • [37:33] Keith: Yeah, yeah I agree. Ah, what do you have any? ah like some people are sort of exhibitionists and some people are what is it when people voyeurs when.
  • [37:46] Mike: Voyur you want to look yeah like so that's right, yes.
  • [37:50] Keith: You want to watch what is it when you like having sex in public places is that is that exhibitionism. Okay, but most people don't want to actually get caught So that's not really exhibitionist. That's like you want the risk of getting caught.
  • [38:09] Mike: No I mean well no, there are there are definitely people for example on Chatterbait who are say at least that they're exhibitionists. There are there is actually a way to go on there and not ask for tokens like you're not. You can't be given money and ah.
  • [38:09] Keith: That that somehow amps it.
  • [38:22] Keith: Um, whoa sure.
  • [38:25] Mike: Usually they're on the less attractive side but there are be I've seen people do that before ah and of course I haven't looked for this actually which is shame on me I should but I'm sure there's a lot of men on there doing that just beating off just by themselves like that makes sense to me men like to like it when other people watch them beat off. That's a common thing. Um, but sure I mean you know this is a like I have to say that ah, it's not exactly exhibitionism but you and I both run in relatively big cities frequently and I more than 100 times have run past a car where the people were fucking.
  • [38:44] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
  • [39:03] Mike: It's It's just so many that it's not notable to me anymore. And yeah I make I take care not to slow down stop do anything like that. But you do notice because sometimes you can see the woman's but she's usually on top of the man. That's usually what's going on and ah yes, it's not hard to see what's going on and and I assume.
  • [39:03] Keith: Um, yeah, yeah, yeah.
  • [39:16] Keith: Yep.
  • [39:22] Mike: It's probably partly like they don't have a room because they're teenagers or something but part of it might be the chance of being seen.
  • [39:26] Keith: Um, right? Yeah yeah I think I think people have different risk tolerances there like this person is being so Risky. It seems like she wants to get caught. But I think most people don't actually want to get caught. It's the it's the risk of getting caught that that's the turn on not the getting not the actual getting caught sure she may be imagining something different than what.
  • [39:52] Mike: Yeah I think it depends on what the consequences of getting caught would be um.
  • [40:02] Mike: I mean I've seen I've seen at least 1 time a porn where the woman is sort of there in a skyscraper but it's they're kind of on a low floor. Maybe it's a hotel and people you can see that people below see them I think I could see somebody getting turned on by that particularly somebody who's kind of vain.
  • [40:02] Keith: Is probable.
  • [40:14] Keith: Yeah I've seen this as well. Yeah.
  • [40:21] Mike: And they think oh look these people want to see me doing this. Um, although it's a little hard for me to understand why that would be compelling a woman of course they want to see you doing it unless you're unattractive and the guy like no, they don't want to see you. They want to see the woman so it's fairly cut and dried. So I I don't think there's anything really surprising there.
  • [40:38] Keith: Yeah, yeah, okay, all right, let's move on a listener sent us this one. It's also from Reddit though. My ex-girlfriend who is 25 wants to have casual sex with me. He is 22
  • [40:40] Mike: Um.
  • [40:57] Keith: We're both still single. But there is a catch my ex contacted me a few days ago and she said she wanted to have sex with me a no-strings attached situation. A relationship came to an end without drama. We realized we were but her off as friends and now we might be friends with benefits. But first I had to tick all the boxes on the preference sheet she prepared for me.
  • [41:14] Mike: First.
  • [41:16] Keith: Not even kidding she texted it to me this was on her list based on her past experiences with me. Okay, there are 11 line items here I think we should litigate these 1 by 1 Okay number 1 intense eye contact is a no.
  • [41:25] Mike: Okay, yeah, like.
  • [41:31] Keith: So she does not want him to make intense eye contact with her.
  • [41:34] Mike: So she wants dogggie or whatever. Okay gone on you have anything to say about that? yeah.
  • [41:41] Keith: My my guess is that he's sort of creepily was staring into her eyes in some sort of loving way and I mean she broke up with him and she still wants to fuck him but she doesn't want any of that intimacy.
  • [41:57] Mike: So this is hang on this is sorry I misunderstood the story here. It's not that they've never had sex before they have and she's basically giving him a list of like objections to how it's been in the past. Oh ok, um.
  • [42:05] Keith: Um, yes, well it's his ex-girlfriend and now they she wants to switch to a casual sex situation but she has a to do list for him.
  • [42:17] Mike: So 1 thing I would say about that is that um I think ah sadly it actually does make me sad for my own brain looking in the eyes of ah of a woman while nutting can increase the intensity of the orgasm. The reason I say this is that. And this is just embarrassing but with with the with the oculus and the vr porn like I should just look at the point of copulation. But sometimes I look at the woman's eyes. It's embarrassing and so and obviously that's doing something for me and of course with the oculus.
  • [42:37] Keith: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
  • [42:44] Keith: Yeah. Do they look into the camera.
  • [42:53] Mike: Yeah, because the way most of the most of them are filmed. Ah, the guy has like a yeah, the guy has like a camera on his face or his chest or something and so.
  • [42:56] Keith: Is P O v.
  • [43:02] Keith: Um I don't know what the what the oculus camera rig looks like I mean the yeah anyway.
  • [43:07] Mike: I'm sure it's very silly looking. Yeah, you'll be. You'll probably get to know it as soon as all the cam people move over to Vr which I'm sure is coming. Oh yeah, oh oh for sure for sure. Yeah, that she's looking into the camera a lot or at least.
  • [43:13] Keith: Yeah, but but the director instructs the girl to look into the camera.
  • [43:24] Mike: Yeah, it's it's not creepy. Ah meaning it's not. You know it's not you don't feel you don't get the sense that she's looking at your forehead or something you get the sense that she's looking pretty much at you and and importantly in order to do that. You kind of have to lift your neck because your say on the guy's you're on the guy's chest and when you do that You're no longer seeing any anything.
  • [43:40] Keith: Right.
  • [43:43] Mike: Ah, erotic really and yet I still do it because yeah I mean I think there's something that amps up I mean I'm just looking for. Yeah I'm just looking for the yeah, the best high I can get um and yeah of course in in real life I in real life I think you can do both.
  • [43:50] Keith: Um, yeah, human Yeah yeah, okay, but she doesn't want that.
  • [44:02] Mike: Better. That's one of the I think like the field of view or something I'm vr Porn's not quite good enough. It's not quite realistic like you should be able to take in more of a body than you do at a glance.
  • [44:09] Keith: Yeah I think it's hard to make camera lenses that don't have a weird warping at the edges that have the same field of view as the human eye all right number 2 man moaning is a yes so she wants.
  • [44:16] Mike: You know that makes sense. It's annoying.
  • [44:27] Keith: She wants to know that he's enjoying it. Basically.
  • [44:29] Mike: I find that ah this is ah another like embarrassing thing for me I find that ah, if I if I had to pick between a porn where the guy is totally silent when Nutting. Or one where he makes some amount of sound I would pick the latter now I don't want a lot of sound but there's like what totally silent is not great.
  • [44:50] Keith: Um, yeah idea I think there's an uncanny valley there. Yeah, the woman wants the man to bone just because she wants her ego stroked all right number 3 Yeah I think that's it.
  • [44:54] Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
  • [45:02] Mike: You think? yeah, but it's very common in the chick flicks subreddit ah is that right? chick flix yeah, that's the one where that has sort of the it's actually very frequently recommended to people in Nsf W 4 1 one subredit which is.
  • [45:08] Keith: Ah.
  • [45:18] Mike: And one I frequent Xxax yeah, and men are not allowed to post there. But it's pretty frequent that women will look specifically for porns where the guy is making sounds and and those what they're looking for is too much sound for me. So if.
  • [45:18] Keith: Um, yeah, it's spelled weird. It's like FLIX x or something okay makes sense.
  • [45:32] Keith: Yeah.
  • [45:34] Mike: If there's one that they specifically call out as as having a lot of mail moaning. It's going to be I'm not going to like it and.
  • [45:37] Keith: Yeah I think you're merely trying to and to avoid the Uncanny Valley and they're looking for something to actually.
  • [45:43] Mike: But the thing is I don't think it's stroking their ego or it might be doing that I guess in addition to that it's it turns them on. Yeah the sound they want. They want that oral experience. True true. Okay, fair.
  • [45:52] Keith: Yeah I mean well and porn and porn and real sex are a little bit different so incentives may may vary okay number 3 bending me backwards to kiss me during doggie. No, she says she likes her spine intact.
  • [46:01] Mike: Yeah, sure.
  • [46:09] Mike: Um, what does that mean exactly so lifting her up or.
  • [46:11] Keith: I Think this guy must do a thing where he like bends forward and tries to kiss her while he's in doggy style while they're in Dogie style this is but no, it is not.
  • [46:24] Mike: Ah, okay, is that a move you you like to do do you do you prefer her to keep say her hands touching the bed or to.
  • [46:31] Keith: It's pretty that would be pretty awkward I think.
  • [46:39] Mike: Her elbows or to push her all the way down. So her chest is against the bet which of those 3 is your preferred.
  • [46:46] Keith: Ah, arms straight and splayed out elbows down or what was the third option.
  • [46:50] Mike: Just like arms straight in front of her and like her chest is again or whatever like her yeah face down that as up that's interesting. Oh that that makes sense I was going to say that's a.
  • [46:54] Keith: Oh yeah, yeah I think the more the further down they are the better. The angle.
  • [47:07] Keith: I Knew that's where you're going.
  • [47:07] Mike: This is a penis size thing. No it does make sense because you're basically yeah you you can. It's a more depth of penetration in that position that makes sense. Yeah I think my my preferred is ah more up. Yeah, because it doesn't they don't have problems.
  • [47:16] Keith: Sure more upright.
  • [47:27] Mike: Bottoming out causing pain. Yeah.
  • [47:31] Keith: I Don't understand if I hesitate.
  • [47:36] Mike: Oh well, if yeah, so if you're if when the with the with the um face down ass up position. The butt cheeks don't sort of get in the way at all, you can. That's probably like the deepest aside from like well of the doggy style positions That's probably the deepest penetration you can get and oftentimes.
  • [47:42] Keith: Aha.
  • [47:48] Keith: Um, oh I see right? if when you do that you you hit the cervix. Yeah I got it.
  • [47:53] Mike: The problem I have in that. Yeah, it's what I'd cause pain. Whatever it is and the problem is that like in the doggie style position. Naturally, you want to be able to kind of you know, get your business done So you don't want to be carefully metering your depth exactly.
  • [48:04] Keith: Right? needing to worry about that right? Yeah, all right fair enough all right? So yeah, again, she says she wants her spine intact. But I think she just does want to kiss this. She doesn't want into intimacy again.
  • [48:20] Mike: She's like no eye contact. No kissing but it's not. It's not exactly no kissing yet. Although that may be next yeah like okay.
  • [48:21] Keith: Right? Yeah, but let's let's keep going here for biting is a no so that implies that he thought that biting was a yes before.
  • [48:34] Mike: Yeah I mean it depends on what I guess to some extent it depends on what body parts. Although probably I mean I guess nibbling on your ear or something there things you could come up with that would be maybe okay.
  • [48:46] Keith: Yeah I look there's different magnitudes of biting I've been with people that are just obnoxiously aggressive on the biting. Um, yeah, my lip my lips Sometimes it's not great.
  • [48:54] Mike: Like your shoulders or something. Yeah, that's I mean do you ever think? Do you ever think that's just to mark you to make it harder for you to have sex with someone else in the near term.
  • [49:05] Keith: Um, I've considered that I don't it could be that but I don't think so Mike I don't give I just don't give multiple maybe I maybe now that I'm older I do. When I was younger I just don't give multiple partner vibes like I don't people don't worry about that with me.
  • [49:26] Mike: Okay, but but it might just be it might make them feel like they've taken possession of you or something. There might be some turn on there like they've marked you.
  • [49:33] Keith: Yeah, maybe yeah, it could be thrusting when I have your dick in my mouth is a no.
  • [49:40] Mike: Okay, that's too bad. That's fun.
  • [49:42] Keith: Yeah, it is. She's really removing all agency and intimacy from him here. 6 is expecting me a swallow to swallow is a no seven is winking at me when we lock eyes during oral is no.
  • [49:53] Mike: Okay, step 2
  • [50:02] Mike: That's not something that would ever occur to me as a man right? I'm trying to think I mean of course it's a to a significant extent her fault because it's actually kind of interesting.
  • [50:03] Keith: To wink. Yeah, it either.
  • [50:16] Mike: She's saying I don't want intense eye contact but in oral when she's giving oral. It actually be difficult. She's going to have to strain to do this in the first place. So what? Yeah, she should just say I'm not going to do eye contact with you during well you know that's difficult you is Keith is now trying to ah see what you would have to do it's it.
  • [50:22] Keith: To make eye contact.
  • [50:31] Keith: Yeah I'm trying to pretend that I have something horizontal in my mouth and I'm like cocking my head to make eye contact.
  • [50:34] Mike: Yeah. Oh This is a thing women complain about that that men expect to get eye contact during oral and it's actually kind of physically difficult. It's much easier for a guy to give eye contact while giving oral to a woman than for a woman. Yeah, right.
  • [50:43] Keith: Um, yeah.
  • [50:50] Keith: Right? Yeah, the angle's different. Yeah, all right 8 condom is a yes 9 is telling me you're about to come and that's saying or am I was not funny. The first time you did it.
  • [50:57] Mike: Now.
  • [51:07] Keith: And it will still not be funny if you do it again. So that's a no.
  • [51:12] Mike: I'm not yeah that again is a thing that would not have occurred to me. Yeah.
  • [51:15] Keith: Yeah I mean this guy's 22 this seems a little awkward so I guess he said he's about to come and then probably a few moments passed and then he was like or am i.
  • [51:21] Mike: It Yeah right.
  • [51:30] Mike: So I think like when you as a guy choose the words you're going to say at that moment. Um, what I've experienced personally is like in my whatever functioning of my brain that I have at that time like I think that what I'm saying is like. Amping up the situation and making it hotter and I would it would never occur to me to make a joke because yeah, I'm trying to like make it. Yeah I'm trying I'm trying to get that last like point two out of my orgasm you know I'm trying to get it from a 7 to a seven point two or whatever and I if I made a joke. Well so I guess okay here's the deal.
  • [52:00] Keith: Um, yeah.
  • [52:06] Mike: If he makes that joke then the answer is no if a guy says am I I'm about to come or am I Then he's not I think because I don't think well yeah, he's cannonballing his own. He's destroying his own orgasm. He's lowering it. Why would he do that.
  • [52:10] Keith: Right.
  • [52:20] Keith: Yeah I don't think like we've talked about announcing orgasms at length in the past. Ah announcing that you're kind orgasm and then pulling it back. It's not good. You should be pretty sure you're going to orgasm before you announce.
  • [52:25] Mike: Yeah.
  • [52:35] Mike: Right? Yeah, you wouldn't yeah that's a bizarre bizarre I mean it reminds me I mean it. It reminds me a little of the I'm going I get at my wizard hat and and wand or whatever that that thing from the early days of sexting what do they used to call it.
  • [52:54] Keith: Oh cyber 6 yeah cybering.
  • [52:54] Mike: Cyber cyber sex so they call it cybering. Yeah, so yeah, there was that guy got in with one of the the joke I used to do was I would just claim I came really fast right? So we get like they they'd say like 3 things and I'd say I come that was it I did not find.
  • [53:10] Keith: Ah, Mike has left the chat. Ah.
  • [53:13] Mike: Yeah I did not find I did not find cybering compelling at all like yeah, right like.
  • [53:17] Keith: Yeah, though, it's not ah I did it could be but the writing of the weird man on the other side is typically not very good.
  • [53:27] Mike: Did you did I ever tell you the story. So I ah I might have told you the story this was back in the days of aim a instant messenger. So in the the the two thousand S Mid 2000 s probably and ah I was chatting with this girl and ah.
  • [53:33] Keith: Um, yeah.
  • [53:45] Mike: She she She was very hot to trot. But ah I was married and um so I told her look I I can't have sex with you honey. But I have a friend who can and he and it happened yeah worked Yes, yeah yeah I was able to do the.
  • [53:56] Keith: Really. Wow.
  • [54:04] Mike: Ah, aim sexed transfer but is it transfer not a wing man like it was she only knew me and then I was like hey I just you're so hot to Trot I know this guy this guy who can take care of you. She was actually pretty attractive like it was really odd like I don't.
  • [54:05] Keith: But aim wingman. Yeah, that's impressive right.
  • [54:19] Keith: Was there. There was no fallout from this I feel like.
  • [54:25] Mike: Ah, let's see she she came and visited she was in Southern California we were in Northern California she came and visited and had sex with him a bunch of times and then ah he went down there and actually I happened to go with him and so saw her there and it was I like I think that she.
  • [54:29] Keith: I hope.
  • [54:36] Keith: Yeah.
  • [54:42] Mike: Ah, was never how do I say this she she was skeptical that what happened had actually happened in other words, she thought maybe she had been talking to him the whole time. So I think that was part of why it worked is she thought oh this is just a little game. He's playing and then when she and then and then at some point I think she realized that.
  • [54:52] Keith: I see I see.
  • [55:02] Mike: And no, actually we were That's not what happened I did pass her off but by then she was in too deep and I don't know what ultimately happened with the relationship I mean that obviously broke up somewhere. So.
  • [55:05] Keith: Yeah, right, right? right? He marry the girl from aim that's that's a shape I ah I asked out my. First girlfriend using aim in 1997 yeah, it was really really pathetic but I was I was too shy. Yeah I I remember like I don't remember the exact messages but I remember.
  • [55:27] Mike: Wow. But that's a very old am usage did it work. Did you say? Yes, yeah.
  • [55:41] Mike: So this was the first girl you ever asked out. Interesting. Yeah I don't think I asked any girls out this is what have been in high school or something junior high. Yeah I don't think I ever asked girls out in junior high or high school. It just happened.
  • [55:42] Keith: The spirit of the messages. Yeah.
  • [55:55] Keith: Um, yeah, yeah.
  • [56:00] Keith: Right? Yeah I didn't know what I was doing but she said yes.
  • [56:00] Mike: There was no like formal moment like that that.
  • [56:07] Mike: Um, in Junior High I had a girl who ah became sort of obsessed with me which was strange because I was virtually prepubescent and ah she started calling me all the time. Ah, she wanted to talk on the phone.
  • [56:19] Keith: What did your parents think ah mean I wish my parents my parents refused to get an extra phone line I Yeah I mostly needed it for the moat for the modem but it would have been nice if ah.
  • [56:21] Mike: Well, my parents had gotten an extra phone line. This was back when people used landlines for my.
  • [56:33] Mike: That's nerdy So our extra one was for my sister who was a little bit of a wild child and they were just trying to get her off their phone line and then I sort of inherited it. Um, but this girl would ah she just wanted to talk on the phone all the time and I didn't.
  • [56:42] Keith: Ah, yeah, yeah.
  • [56:50] Mike: Was slightly too young to be I was sort of embarrassed by it and so forth and I just felt like I was like look I have other stuff to do which was probably like playing dungeons and dragons or something like not not very impressive and ah so I just stopped talking to her and so I have a yearbook from I think ninth grade or eighth grade. Whatever it was where.
  • [56:55] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
  • [57:08] Mike: She just wrote stuff throughout the entire yearbook complaining like why did you stop talking to me which by the way she was really attractive. So really dumb dumb move.
  • [57:16] Keith: Well I mean you were far away from having a well developed brain at that point. Well.
  • [57:23] Mike: Yeah I know but I I did masturbate at that time. So it's a little hard for me to understand why I didn't connect that possibility with that and I just didn't like I just thought oh this is this girl who wants to be friends. It never occurred to me that like she could blow me or whatever.
  • [57:31] Keith: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
  • [57:41] Keith: She's being frustrating and annoying for sure for sure the wealth if you ever come across a time machine. You know what to do? ah okay number 10 is.
  • [57:43] Mike: Yeah, like I'm sure that I could have converted that into some like kind of yeah, well next next life next time through right now.
  • [57:55] Keith: Death gripping. My tits is a no so I guess he was too rough with her with her chest.
  • [57:56] Mike: 5
  • [58:02] Mike: Is yeah I Wonder if she means nipples or actual like the whole whole apparatus.
  • [58:07] Keith: Who knows or her communication style is a little bit Smug and entitled but this guy sounds like his technique could use some use as well.
  • [58:16] Mike: What is the what is the range. We all know of course that generally breasts feel like bags of sand but ah, what is the range of um squishiness of breasts that you've encountered in your dating life.
  • [58:21] Keith: Yes.
  • [58:31] Keith: Um, they're pretty squishy. Ah.
  • [58:33] Mike: You've not you haven't encountered too many because I mean on you'll read Well I think I think I encountered this information in the last like month because of some crap about Mammograms but you'll read about like different densities different densities of breasts. Um, you're saying that you have not encountered a high density.
  • [58:49] Keith: Yeah fat density. Well I think the highest density are implants. Ah yeah, but I think I think basically it's a ah.
  • [58:52] Mike: Breasts very much. Sure sure but setting those aside.
  • [59:06] Keith: Some sort of distribution but implants are significantly more dense than even the most dense of real breasts. Um.
  • [59:15] Mike: And would you say that? ah breasts are always denser less dense rather than ah but than the fat on a woman's butd I Think that's I think the answer is yes but I'm not.
  • [59:23] Keith: Yeah I think the answer is yes too I have not been with many women who aren't in good shape and so it could be that women who have a little bit more junk down there have less dense less density but I'm not sure.
  • [59:31] Mike: Okay.
  • [59:41] Mike: Right? It does seem like the lack of density of breasts is sort of unique I Guess I Guess maybe a man's balls would be the only other.. Ah yeah, that's they're you somewhat a you. It's unique in in terms of a part of the of the way. The lack of density of breasts. Even even say a fat person in like the fat the roll of fat on their stomach I think typically would be more dense maybe because the skin is thicker I'm not sure why.
  • [01:00:04] Keith: Yeah, yeah, boobs are pretty not tense I mean people talk about Perky breasts and you know presumably That's somehow connected to density. But.
  • [01:00:19] Mike: So right I think it is that I think it's connected to the the skin being taught and firm supple right? Yeah, that makes sense.
  • [01:00:24] Keith: Think I think I think that's right I'm guessing the fat tissue is fairly consistent. Yeah no, which is why that line is so.
  • [01:00:37] Mike: So not not at all bags of sand though. Yeah.
  • [01:00:43] Mike: Yeah.
  • [01:00:43] Keith: Quisitely funny in 40 year old virgin. Ah, okay, and then her last one is 10 percent missionary and 90% everything else. No so I think she's saying she wants more missionary.
  • [01:00:54] Mike: No yes, so yes, so basically this guy would throw her in the dog. Yank her back to do kissing stareing or stare at her eyes and then just and also yeah and then just they get blows from her and what she wants is just like plain right.
  • [01:01:03] Keith: Um, wink at her say he's about to come and then walk it back. Yeah.
  • [01:01:13] Mike: So you'd be yeah, her much Simpler would be she wants kind of basic missionary sex. It makes sense.
  • [01:01:15] Keith: And whatever this guy's 22 I mean he asks at the end I still need to respond are all those nose an indication that I'm bad in bed had no idea she had all these problems with me when we're having sex. Yeah I mean this is why I think young women should date older men.
  • [01:01:23] Mike: Yes.
  • [01:01:33] Keith: You don't have to deal with this.
  • [01:01:36] Mike: I think there's a number of other things. You don't have I actually think that from a woman's perspective that would he might not even be in the top. 5 reasons why an older man would make more sense for like I mean there's a whole bunch of behaviors that are different.
  • [01:01:52] Keith: Yeah, yeah.
  • [01:01:54] Mike: Tolerance for the woman being kind of not stable is also higher probably um, yeah.
  • [01:02:00] Keith: Yeah I mean young men are insufferable. So yeah anyway, ah all right? That's enough I'm going to read us out here. That's the end of episode 92 of your mileage may vary.
  • [01:02:11] Mike: That's not yep.
  • [01:02:16] Keith: For those who are new to the show or for those who have forgotten we pay $10 for all feedback received you can send us feedback on Twitter at ymm and y m m vpod. Let me try to hit again on Twitter at y mmvpod or at y m mvpod at Gmail.com ah, that's also a place to ask us questions. Let us know if we may use your questions on the air and we promise not do I identify you thanks for listening and we hope you'll join us next week on your mileage may vary.