Mike discovers that people on the Internet (and Keith, apparently) measure their masturbation sessions using their step tracking devices. Apparently a "1000-stroke session" is a long one, with the typical male masturbation experience being more like 500 strokes. Stay tuned for the female equivalent (if that can be properly measured).
Is it possible that a woman could enjoy using a dildo on herself that has a fake cum reservoir that, when squeezed, squirts simulated semen into her? We're sort of doubtful.
Keith's out of town, so Ally stopped by to answer some listener questions and discuss her sex life. What I learned is that she prefers a longer penis -- a veritable cervix hammer -- which suits me fine. She also likes some annoying things, like people being nice to each other before, during and after sex. Also, she frequently expects continued sexual attention after the man orgasms. That's a tough one.
The 45-55 subreddit appears to appeal primarily to people who like heavily surgically modified breasts, or so I would say. If you come out of the operating room and your nipples now point directly upward, something has gone wrong. We review the relevant subreddit.
I'm really, really, like extraordinarily interested in my own penis. I think this is likely normal, though I'm not sure.